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2 lines
90 KiB
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array {avi {{PooPal testdrive} {argue in favor of SaaS webshits} {attend an iot conference} {be pretentious} {blog poos} {buy squatty potty} {commit blackmail in order for financial gain} cry {do a tedtalk on fart related lifehacks} {dream of being fully tenured} {drink a lot of tea} {explain femisnism to female colleague} {explain how a joke works} {fail students without mercy} {farting in office} {get groped by airport security} {get made fun of for being a crypto-sjw} {get picked on by blimp and nop} {give slutty student the D and then a D} {give wall'o'text explanation to trivial problem with authority} {head department of computer assisted pooing} {hide from students} {ignore what you're talking about} {inspire students to nethack} {liberal hand wringing} {make a microphone out of garbage} {miss poo window} {play binding of isaac} {polish lambda cap} {post imgur links} {pretend to write papers} procrastinate {promote functional programming but not use it} {provoke winkie} {put considerable amount of time into borderlands 2} {race mix} {recover from computer game addiction} {regex nigger} {relapse back to playing computer games} {shooting rampage} {sob about being busy} {stop triggering words with a regex} {submit a paper to proceedings of poo-logging} {succumb to mischa's tricks} {talk about bowel movements} {travel to china} {travel to india} {travel to japan} {unbox dildo of the month selection} {use baby wipes to clean ass} {whine incessentantly} {work on poop log procs} {worry about unintentional mansplaining} {write impenetrable jargon} {yell at students}} zybl0re {80 8D {Poo Arrival} XD {[D8]} {ask how to add an agenda} {coffee for zybl0re} {collect rocks} {curate rock collection} d8 {designer drugs at gay orgy} {drag fags from the back of his beat-up F250} {dream of getting gaped in Fort McMurray} {dream of moving to the big city -- Coquitlam} {dream of moving to the big city -- regina} {drink pee} {extol the virtues of openoffice versus libreoffice} {fix broken truck} {fly to halifax} {freestyle gape} {freestyle rap} gape gapes {get a b.sc in nethack} {get a m.sc in nethack} {get hi} {have someone piss in my mouth} {live the jerkcity lifestyle} {look at rock collection} {nigger dragging in F250} {openoffice slavery} {pick up rig pigs in the back of his f250} {plant trees} {post at r/rockhounds} {pray for rise in brent crude prices} {rape mother earth} {receive thorough gaping} {ride around on girls bike with a banana seat and pink streamers} {ride bicycle} {rock out} rock-jockery {rocks for jocks 101} {rotate jerkcity avatars for twitter avatar} {save money for gas} {sell out dreams of 7.3 F350 for nissan pathfinder} {solve dix equation} {take ferry to nanaimo} {take ferry to tsawwassen} {think of names for his new pet rock} {think of new ways to gape} timeout {write a perl to scrape some weather data and then use a python to make some neat graphs} ¯_(ã)_/¯} ryan {{blog about being an untouchable hacker god} {claim to be high on acid on irc} {claim to be the north korea of the internet} {create mixtape of all the greatest artists who choked on their own vomit} {destroy an american family} {do something stupid and impulsive with a computer} {drop sql table} {fly cessna into red square} {hack a gibson} {hack bloggers to death} {hack sony} {hack tesla} {hack the planet} {hide from parole officer} {interview with [choose BBC CNET {New York Times}] } {swat Mikko Hypponen} {torment r000t} {try to live off bitcoins} {upload masterhacker.bmp to lenovo.com}} biden {{amazing gaff} {forget which race im running in} hide microstroke {rape allegations} {remind people about obama} {sniff hair} {subconjunctival hemorrhage} sundown} ollipekka {{'invest' into rolex watches} {accidentally type hacker command into irc} {advance science by reusing patterns invented by much smarter and more valuable people} {almost get stabbed by pikeys} {artisanal sandwich} {ask poo god forgiveness} {box2d cleanroom implementation} {browse [randreddit nsfw] for fun} {burn sub-saharan village worth of kw/h on failed builds} {change diapers} {chat about hex} {check up on hex chats} {compete with baby in terd-off} {complain about hex} {complain about wife} {conduct research on [pornsite_word] } {creep on dudes in the locker room to see who has the biggest balls} crossfit {crossfit wod} {cycle in and out of chat because of bad connection} {daydream about jocular chat horseplay with hex, during a berry expedition} {daydream dream driving 500sec with red sub} {die of dehydration via butol} {dream about hex} {dream about owning a blue gmt master} {drive niguan on berry-picking expedition to the forest} {drive niguan on expedition across frozen finnish tundra} {drool over 500sec amg} {eat berries} {eat smoked fish} {evaluate hexagenda} {fart hesitantly} {file a technical bankruptcy} {frame provincial eastern european university diploma} {get cheap haircut} {hallucinate hex in baby refuse} {holiday in tourist hell-hole} {inflict child on innocent third-parties} {judging [nick]} {judging schlemihl} {larp driving a group b lancia delta stratos while driving niguan through snowy finnish forests} lol@memes {mock turdloggers} {order 100 fidget cubes} {pick lingonberry} {post links to apina.biz} {post unsolicited baby statuses} {pretend never to have browsed puahate forums after the elliot rodger fiasco} {pretend to make a spacegame} {propose board to hire only women for 20% cut in developer wages} {put fish in smoker} {recover from mild alcohol poisoning} {remove kebab} {saq dance wet dream} {see a chick's labia at the gym} {struggle to reproduce 5-letter command} {talk about baby poo} {teach baby its first word: shart} {think about hex} {think of an edgy thing to say to hex} {think of clever comebacks for next chat with hex} {travel 200km to buy pickled herring when the fishing ships arrive in september} {troll hex to add yet another agenda line} {twitter on the shitter} {update deviantart account} {voyage on the hms shitanic} {wear 7k watch to the playgrounds} {wear â¬7,000 watch to children's playground} {wonder what hex is doing} {wreck shitter in 5-star hotel and on Airbus A330-300}} covid {{DESTROY THE BOOMERS} SPREAD {make line go down} {suddenly disappear in spring}} accidentally {{dox a chatter while doing a livestream}} black {{defend cosby on facebook} {get shot by black policeman} {get stopped by highway patrol} {have a dozen children} {rape white woman} {unsuccessfully argue with police} {vote trump}} canuck {{Nickelback opening for Barenaked Ladies} {[canadian_food_word]} {because it's [year]} {blame chinese for the hiked up the property prices} {chase away that coyote again} {counterfeit canadian tire money} {get mauled by a bear} {get tim hortons} {more chinese people} {never win stanley cup} {pay 100 dollars a month for 90s internet} {pay 50 dollars a month for 3gb data plan} {put yor toddler in technical skating school} {rob ford sighting} {send homeless to B.C.} {smoke weed} {trip to costco across the border} {win hockey world championships} {worry about what US americans think of you even though they don't}} teth {{Admit that you only make 11.50/hr while getting catphished by lesser losers on irc} {ask for roy's permission to use the kitchen} {brag about undergrad math degree from 23 years ago} {emo quit irc for a week because you don't believe they have a normal career} {get catphished by lesser losers on irc} {go play anime card games at a shop with 12 year olds} {larp heterosexuality} {publish manifesto on pastebin} {remissness about your time with Occupy Dayton} {repair 12 year old dell laptop} {send chatgirls a selfie from 1993} {shift at spring factory} {shift on #apu yelling about faggot monsters} {spend his weekends tapping for mana} {unlawfully restrain an olympian and national hero} {upload washed out picture from 1993 to dating site profile} {violently assault an olympian and national hero} {walk across the street to reload his cricket feature phone} {watch 'the 40 year old virgin' with envy}} winkie {{24 hour z-line on incog} {Dr. Who larping with friends} {Redesign Nigger Timer for Shaniqua-2} {Replace jew control belt on Shaniqua-2} {Tinker with [choose golang TCL perl6]} {VOTE LEAVE} {Z-Line chat friends} {[. Day [rand 10000] of chat blockade]} {accuse [name] of tax avoidance} {adjust edc} {adventures in domestic plumbing} {an youtube} {apply to mensa} {argue with colin} {argue with incog} {avoid sexual contact} {banter with hex} {be done with incog} {be thwarted by office internet filters} {become a salaryman} {bikeshedding in golang} {blow paycheck on aquaria} {break ircd.conf} brew {build a house in france} chemtrails {close #botfuckery} {commit rudest operabuse} {complain about being highlighted} {complain about not being taxed enough} {complain about roommates} {condescendingly give tech support} {confuse tax avoidance and tax evasion} {cut finger off in woodshop} {defend non-procreative incest} dentist {documentary on [w_topic]} {don't question authority, in true leftist style} emoquit {eye £500 / day contracts but don't apply to them} {fix car} {forget to join Shaniqua to #cockes} {forsake chatties} {forsake his chatties} {furiously defend google on hackernews} {get ddosed} {get keys to city} {give police wholehearted support} {global message for donations} {go through lucrative contracts in greater manchester area} {gouge self with auger} hackernews {have protracted conversation with one's self out loud} {holiday with mum & dad} {janitor chats} {join camra} {k-line incog} {kerbal space program} {labour dispute} {making bird house in wood shop} {midnight chicken consumption} {neglect proc janitor duties} {not fixing bot} {own a car but avoid getting license to drive it} {passive aggressively refuse to chat} {pay taxes in full} perl6 {plan to do carpentry work but procrastinate} {purge the reactionaries} {put minions on PIP} {quit irc again} {quit irc forever} {quit mischa's slack} {read decisions on a mailing list from 1994} reddit {remove incog's +e} {restart vps} {return to irc} {ruin everyone's good afternoon of networked opentdd} {sharpen tools} {sit on massive stash of bitcoins} {sit on shaniqua dumps} {smoke weed} {sort flatmate issues} {spend entire income on wood working tools} {spy on #cockes via Shaniqua} statism {study the original geimu obu turonusu manga and sneer at the inconsistencies in the anime adaptation} {suggest Shaniqua feature to do later} {talk abour building a house in france} {theorycraft house in france} {update kanban board} {update kanban board of Shaniqua-2} {watch french chateau dreams go up in flames} {watch live action anime} {watch reality tv show about cupcakes} {work on cv in latex} {write some perl}} publish {{manifesto on pastebin}} 8O 8O mtw {{Napoleonic complex} {beg xboxlive for unban at irl session} {buy jacket off homeless man} {chicken out of fight} {empty packeting threats} {get court documents purged from pacer} {impersonate black_man} {lights out} {manage to shit up #stress} {meeting with FBI handler} {morning count} {pray for puberty to start} prison sequel snitch {somehow remain out of jail despite facing 1029 years in prison} {sprinting practice} {steal source code to shit game} {think of new scams to run when released} {threaten to shoot [name]} {typical manlet behavior} {work for cable company} yard} attend reactconf gudrow {{2 scoops of pre-workout} {3 Scoops of Benefibre} beach {pokemon blue} {pokemon red} {take photo of dog for chat crew} {walk dog} {week's worth of government work}} brit {{vote leave}} oliver {{complain about shit chats} {shit chat} {suck up to vxp}} J eval popeye {{beat off while looking at a horse} {help jack off a horse} {jerk off (ironically) to mlp} {vigorously defend masturbation practices}} GNU {} bats {Arby's Barburrito Baskin-Robbins {Big Boy} Bojangles {Buffalo Wild Wings} {Burger King} {Carl's Jr.} Checkers Chick-fil-A Chili's Chipotle Chuck-E-Cheese {Cicis Pizza} {Cold Stone Creamery} {Cracker Barrel} {Cumberland Farms} {Dairy Queen} {Del Taco} Denny's Dominos {Dunkin' Donuts} {Godfather's Pizza} Hardee's Harvey's Hesburger {Huddle House} IHOP {Jack in the Box} {Jimmy John's} {Krispy Kreme} Krystal {Little Caesars} {Mall Food Court} {Max Hamburgers} {Mrs. Winner's Chicken and Biscuits} {Olive Garden} {Olive Garden never ending pasta bowl} {Orange Julius} {Panda Express} {Papa Gino's} Qdoba Rally's {Red Lobster} {Robin's Donuts} {Roy Rogers} {Shake Shack} Sizzler {Skyline Chili} Sonic {State Fair Concession Cart} {Steak 'n Shake} TGIF {Taco Bell} {The West Cornwall Pasty Company} {Waffle House} Wendy's Whataburger {White Castle} Wienerschnitzel {Wild Wing Cafe} Wimpy Zaxbys {catty drive-by comments on irc} {cheesecake factory} {church's chicken} {church's fried chicken} cinnabun {crown fried chicken} {cup man boobs} dennys {dippin dots} {disappear from irc when you nolonger can play metagames after losing ircops} {el pollo loco} {emo delete agenda array after being called catty} ennys {five guys} {ghetto taco truck} {golden corral} {happy wok} hot-n-now {in n out} kfc {little ceasers} {long john silvers} mcdonalds {mucho burrito} nando's {old country buffet} {papa johns} perkins {pizza hut} popeyes roscoe's sbarro sonic {swiss chalet} {taco cabana} {taco del rio} tacobell {tim hortons} wendys {white castle}} nigger_ {{be loud} {fit whistle tips to caprice} {look under couch cushions for change for a dutch master from 7/11} {rape white women} {rent furniture} {yell out window to people on stoop}} repair bentley windows {CTRL+ALT+DEL Cortana {DPC_WATCHDOG_VIOLATION 0x133} {Run commercially developed third-party applications with minimal problems} {TASKKILL /F /IM CHROME.EXE} {Warn user they might have been the victim of software counterfeiting} _NSA_KEY {all tools fail because file is locked} {be on desktops} {brag about ripping out security features} bsod {buy a mobilephone with no apps} {change driver model} {complain about being forced to keep system relatively secure} {complain about removed checkbox} {curate antivirus and internet nanny suite} defragment {defragment ram} {defragment ssd disk} {disable all the useful features because our users are idiots} {don't use windows store} {email for grandma} {error in xml configuration file} {fail miserably at batch updating} {fail miserably at ipc} {fbi backdoor} {find right version of .net assembly} {forced upgrade} {furiously backtrack on latest killer feature after most of userbase becomes one gigantic botnet} {get fucked by max system path length} {get hacked by 12yo lunix zealot} {get spyware} {get spyware from installing java} {have more seeds for pirate copies of its OS than the FREE and legal alternatives ISO download count} {hoard knowledge about which checkbox to keep ticked to become the best windows administrator} {install Visual C++ [choose 2005 2008 2010 2012 2013 2015] redistributable again} {install cygwin} {install mingw} {install registry cleaner} {install rootkit from audio cd} {kill a program from taskmanager} {load libraries from local directory} {look for some more binary blobs to download from the internet and blindly inject into the system, with elevated privileges} {make up fruity term for well-known decades-old computer technology} {manually rename folders to delete files} {mirc as Administrator} mmc.exe msconfig.exe {pay [rand 300 3500]\$ for a software library} {press reset button} {pretend to know shit about computer} {promise feature-parity with hobbyist os filesystem and never deliver} {redesign explorer.exe} regedit restart {root kit} {run binary uninstaller provided by vendor, lose filesystem} {run webserver as kernel module} {runs linux binary} {save restore point} {ship binary installer package to add a few lines to a text file} {squint eyes because there is still no DPI scaling} {stop support of popular products} {try to convince users that internet explorer isn't so bad anymore} {update software... fuck, update internet explorer} {video games} {wonder why everything looks shit above hd}} break {{software by fixing webdev's CACHE-CONTROL: NO-CACHE, NO-STORE, MUST-REVALIDATE / EXPIRES: 0}} place {{intrusive advertisements}} m8 {{cheeky nandos} {fone me m8 alfie} {hook u in the gabber} {rekk ye nans filthy gash} {shag ur nan} {sware on me mums life} {u wot}} webdev {{'stache trim} {Cache-Control: no-cache, no-store, must-revalidate / Expires: 0} {Fuck up LSD Microdosing, take rest of day off.} {GET 3RD DEGREE BURNS BECAUSE CHROME OVERHEATED YOUR MACBOOK} {Microdose LSD to enhance productivity} {Migrate Node.JS code to GoLang, and blog about it on medium} {Post 'obligatory' xkcd that they don't really get} {Publish 'Five Hundred Days Using Iot'} {Read out loud: "int star mynumber equals shittify open bracket myothernumber close bracket semicolon"} {Roll your own cryptography} {Update twitter bio with band-wagon self-branding 'drinker of beer, engineer of javascrips, dad, christian'} {Upgrade project to use the latest [clock format [clock seconds] -format "%Y-%W"] framework.} {Wonder what CORS is} {Write a line of code after five files and hundred rows of boilerplate} {accept startup equity} {accidentally delete your production database} {add C/C++ to CV after seeing a linux kernel patch} {adopt a code of conduct for a 10 line npm module} {adopt a new beta of some obsecure js framework} {advocate rust, but have no idea how to use it} {apply for ES[year] bootcamp} {apply to interview kickstart.} {argue that writing types increases development time} {argue why commonjs is better than others} {ask around if felony conviction due to attempted mosque arson is a problem} {ask realdev to implement backend that supports infintie scrolls and typeahead searching} {ask the janitor to tar up a file from your own webshit and email it to you} {attempt to provoke social media outrage after getting rejected in a big 5 phone screen} {attempt to start a social media witch hunt after getting offended by torvald's posts on the kernel mailing list} {attend reactconf} {attend to free security webinar that you found in email} b {be a rockstar programmer} {be endorsed for CSS on linked in, but suck at it} {be lower valued than an it janitor} {be the ideasguy on spare time and ask contributors to sign ndas} {become gay sugardad} {beg for patreon money at the end of conference talk} {bikeshed gdpr compliance} {blame 'bro culture' of realdevs for personal failure} {block all of EU because of gdpr compliance} {blog about beating the 1 request/second bottleneck} {blog about having an impostor syndrome or some other millenial shit} {blog about how something isn't funny} {build js orm entirely on string concatenation and ignore parameters} {buy a clever .io domain} {buy twitter followers} {call a 20 line nodejs script an API.} {call angular 'enterprise'} {call yourself 10x programmer} {call yourself enterpreuner while peddling useless blog posts} {call yourself hacker} {cargo-cult go} {cargo-cult rust} {cargocult netflix} {catastrophic scripting failure because the botched version of macosx userland works differently than in linux} {cause gentrification in sf} {cheat in skype interview by googling questions} {check github stars} {circlejerk how webassembly will deprecate js even though it has no dom manipulation} {claim on twitter that you support minority tranny patreon (but don't)} {claim that ml syntax makes computing inaccesible to unprivileged folks} {claim that rest is about human readable json} {claim that ssris remove creativity} {claim that your pull-request was declined because you don't identify as CIS male} {claim to have learners syndrome} {collect stickers and put them on your laptop} {comment on hackernews} {commit insurance fraud before apple event} {complain about the quality of beer in fridge} {compromise code quality so you can include ladyboy from thailand as contributor} {confuse chatbots with conversational ui} {consider migrating stack from php to node.js} {convert database structure to JSON for storage of backups} {copy paste css hacks from stackoverflow} {correct minor typos and oxford comma to code comments of big OSS projects} {create a perfect foam cat on capuchino, due to years of extensive barista experience before ng-bootcamp} {create empty github project} {daydream about getting a blowjob from a github groupie} {deplete fisheries since only free-roaming tuna / cod / salmon is only good enough for your sushi} {deploy a firebase app} {deploy a heroku app} {deploy git repository with sftp} {deploy on heroku} {design ad-blocker-blocker-blocker-blocker to keep your SEO company alive} {design api based on reflection after reading a wiki article about it} {despise java and c# programmers and the enterprise} {die in a rural area after tesla autopilot fails} {disable cors and websecurity on chrome startup} {disappear to cheat on your partner on a conf and get outed on social media} {discover awk and sed and tell realdev about them} {discover lambdas and mistake them as functional programming} {disrupt and centralize decentralized tech} {do adderall to cope} {do manual dom manipulation} {dogmatically avoid tables but use css grid} {don't get how server rendered pages work or what # means in url} {don't get why typescript is so popular} {don't get why whitelisting is better than blacklisting} {don't know how to exit vi} {don't know how to use command line other than brew, gulp, npm} {don't understand how to irc} {don't understand pointers} {don't use debugger at all, because your language doesn't have one} {don't use tls} {dream of adding llvm backend for node} {dream of adding webassembly backend for rust} {dream of becoming an alumnus of Silicon Valley's prestigious Y Combinator accelerator} {dream of being a 100x programmer} {dream of own personality cult and following of github groupies} {drink club mate} {dye hair purple} {experiment with natural home rsi remedies and chinese medicine} {fail at fizzbuzz} {fail to shrinkwrap your npm builds} {fail to understand pointers} {fail to understand relational databases} {fail to utilize csp despite supporting only evergreen browsers} {feel strongly about flow vs typescript} {fix corrupted npm cache} {food poisoning from soylent} {fork a significant github project and contemplate contributing but procrastinate instead} {gay marry} {gentrify the west coast} {get 3rd degree burns to because chrome overheated your macbook} {get angry at n-gate.com and tweet about it} {get blown by a github groupie} {get bored with javascript toy and abandon project} {get coc'd for using urinals in all gender toilet} {get confused by joining tables. migrate to nosql} {get drunk off 8 dollar beers - at the office} {get dumped by your sugarbabe} {get excited about shadow dom} {get food poisoning from soylent} {get forced to step down from your oss project after somebody outed your gor alt-lifestyle} {get hopped on monster} {get incapacitated when there's no wifi or mobile data} {get into an argument with realdev} {get jquery endorsement from realdev on linkedin} {get offended by alias mysql=mysql --i-am-a-dummy} {get rich by investing into micro-cryptocurrencies early on} {get shamed by other programmers} {get shut out of app store due to fake reviews} {get your crypto wallet compromised through NPM malware} {give a talk about scaling circles with css} {give advice on r/cscareerquestions} {go to apple store} {graduate php bootcamp} {graduate visual basic bootcamp} {growth hack your medium post by spamming it on social media} {grunt errors} {have a feeling that realdev resents you} {have a victim complex} {have breakdown when showhn post gets ignored/called trivial} {have microsoft sublime text enshrined as corporate policy} {have your business ruined by react patent clause} {have your whole alt-lifestyle post history associated with your professional reddit/github/twitter account} {hedge your career on google tech} {hulk out when you find out your social media capital is less than your coworkers} {ignore decades of cs and pl research} {ignore that web assembly doesn't allow dom manipulation} {implement ad-hoc case-insensitive variant of protocol} {indiegogo your new iphone} {inherit a jquery project} {insert bitcoin miner to a VSCode plugin} {insert bitcoin miner to javascript} {insert malicious 'metrics code' into notable oss projects for your startup} {install hacker theme to iterm2} {install wordpress store for a relative} {integrate salesforce} {intentionally commit a lock file to a git branch} {json as the engine of application state transfer} {keep an autistic sex slave} {leak database error} {leak personal information of millions of people and blame web framework} {learn the wrong webdev framework and become unemployable} {leave software with gaping xsses} {level-up on hacker news} {list github outage as serious business risk to vc investor} {listen to steve jobbs biography for the nth time on 2.5x speed and cry tears} {live in a car at the company parking lot} {live in a shared room in a boarding house} {locate php.ini} {look into webassembly but give up} {lose job as apple restricts permissions on browsers and hardware} {lose job as you get outed as gor enthusiast} {lose job because of google algorithm change} {lose job due to gdpr} {lose your job due to Google ToS change} {lose your production app data since PAAS you use deleted their production db} {make github page} {make workspace look like ikea model} {meltdown in a job interview} {meticuously practice for big five interview and get declined due to not being a 'cultural fit'} {monetize mit licensed software} {move to newly gentrified neighbourhood} {move to san francisco} {move your database to elasticsearch} {never for a single second worry about cross-database joins} {open patreon} {participate in hackathon} {participate in hillary rally} {pass around database nodes from mongodb instead of arguments} {place intrusive advertisements} {pop open a can of la croix} {port all your code from react to vue because it has more github stars} {post 'i am literally shaking'-piece after minor inconvenience to get attention from personality cult heads} {post a writeup about pros and cons of using github as version control} {preprocess your css} {pretend to write an engagement algorithm} {pretend you are realdev when programming a node microservice} {propose dictionary lookup as optimization to swift compiler} {publish an artisanal yaml parser} {push company private keys and other secrets to version control} {push keys to github} {quit job for a startup that has less than their own new salary in the bank} {ragequit job and decide to become a data scientist} {ragequit job and start a patreon} {real dev larping via making a node.js cli} {register cool domain names in hopes to profit from them} {reinvent the wheel} {remove egg from salad graphic to be inclusive} {restart your text editor because it is a web pos} {rewrite your frontend webpack2 compatible} {ride your 8k USD triathlon cyclocross bike to work, but be fat} {ridicule people for using arcane text editors like vim and emacs} {scrum with your team in an epic sprint for the win} {select count(*) from `80_million_rows`} {select count(*) from `80_million_rows` left join `200_million_rows`} {send PR to realdev changing master/slave to boss/worker} {send racist joke to organisation-wide distribution group} {seriously wonder if process improvement was caused by microdosing or project management tool.} {share blog spam about trivial math concept you don't understand} {shop for pre-made templates} {shut down patreon} {shut down patreon, fail drug test, get let go of} {solicit vc} {solve high availability problems without understanding what high availability means} {somehow troll management into phrasing all their requirements as if they were a quest in a video game about capitalism} {spam trivial piece of code written using an official api on 'hacker' news} {spend an hour figuring out your next js twitter pun in hopes for it to go viral} {spend an hour researching next potential badge on stackoverflow} {spend days solving 'black friday' problem despite having less than five users} {spend hours fighting with webpack2 to get svg served as base64 text instead of putting it under /static} {spout that flow type system is sound and typescript isn't although you are unsure what it means} {startup failure due to google algorithm change} {steal others work and gay molest your colleagues} {step down from your oss project since a company made better free competitor} {study intersectional feminism} {study interview questions (realdev larping)} {suck every inch of paul grahams dick on hackernews in hopes to get noticed} {suddenly stop talking about bitcoin} {suggest X11 replacement based on node/rust/go} {support bernie} {support guy bedford's patreon} {switch indendation to spaces in hopes for salary gain} {sycophant ex rails core team members} {take benzos to sleep} {take conf coc very seriously until you're drunk with trusted peers} {take picture of introductory algorithms book in front of golden gate bridge for reddit} {think rest is json} {think single-pass compilers solve everything} {throw a social media hissyfit when your code isn't accepted to important OSS project} {throw plastic coffee mug lids into the pacific ocean every day} {transpile es6 to es5} {transpile less to sass to css and back} {transpile typescript to es5 to es6 to coffeescript and back} {try out elmish and get confused} {try to liquidate stale startup equity} {tweet about obscure framework hoping it will catch on} {type »underage slut twerking« into youtube search} {unironically add 'epic stories' to project management} {unironically call yourself an artisan after react bootcamp} {unironically put 'javascript engineer' in bio} {unironically respond to linked-in recruiter about recruiting tournament of medieval chief-architects} {unpublish an artisanal yaml parser} {unpublish npm modules} {update stackoverflow points, reddit karma and hackernews points to cv} {update twitter bio: dad, drinker of beer, programmer of javascripts} {upgrade node and break your software} {use 'Let's encrypt!' for certificates} {use browserify} {use cold fusion} {use datetime as part of compound key} {use electron to write desktop app} {use memcached/redis instead of in-memory map} {use mommy1234 as password} {use mongodb} {use nodewebkit to make desktop application} {use political correctness to silence more experienced devs} {use saas instead of installing a package from apt} {use slack for an open source project} {use sublime text} {use timestamp as password} {use typescript conditional types} {version pin [rand 10 3] different versions of the same npm library} {wait 8 minutes for webpack to finish your helloworld app} {watch 'from forklift driver to webdev' 100th time} {watch 40h angular.js video tutorial} {watch all 28 videos on how to use redux} {watch realdev hulk out as you request backend to also support graphql in future} {watch webpack compile for minutes on a single thread} {what's new on product hunt} {whine about gdpr} {wonder how cloud works} {wonder how docker works} {wonder how load balancer works} {wonder how spectre vulnerability affects your node app} {wonder what black friday problem is} {wonder what discriminated unions are} {wonder what elastic scaling is} {wonder what is letsencrypts business plan and how to disrupt them} {wonder what is the use case for relational database} {wonder what kind of idiot uses dvorak or other custom layouts} {wonder what linker is} {wonder what makes libuv is so fast} {wonder what monad is} {wonder what n+1 is} {wonder what obscure forbidden knowledge building an .exe requires} {wonder what side effect are} {wonder what types are} {wonder why janitor gets so angry when you ask him about git errors in [?? {{GitHub Desktop} {PhpStorm} {eclipse}}]} {wonder why people use types since they clearly slow you down and need more typing} {wonder why salaries for ocaml, haskel and f# programmers are so high} {wonder why single point of failures are bad} {wonder why swift takes so long to compile} {wonder why the dba is so angry} {wonder why the devops guy is so angry} {wonder why the janitor laughs when you report progress with ElasticSearchâ¢} {work at a startup} {work at the javascript mines} {work for a company that supposebly 'disrupts' realdevs domain} {work from airbnb} {work on experimental expression sandbox} {work on inane blockchain project} {work on nodebots} {work on your own js cryptocoin} {wrestle with atoms files size limit} {write 60 different modules to do some stupid trivial shit and put them on your cv} {write a gulp plugin to concatenate files} {write a node.js cli utility for beloved window manager: i3} {write a open world metroidvania with minecraft elements and zombies} {write broken diffie helman yourself} {write documentation in markup} {write npm module to check if integer is positive} {write npm module to left pad strings} {write php} {x === 0 && 1 / x === Infinity;}} start {{calling webdev chad after you find out he is succesful with women}} Zaphod {{get php flu} {have to deal with PHP} {pet cat} {scrape cat videos off vine} {write Ruby} {yell at cat}} jew {{Pledge allegiance to Israel} {bilk fundamentalist Christians out of cash} {blood libel} {bulldoze houses} {buy some gefiltefish} {cheating and stealing} {complain about france} {convince the blacks to do your bidding} {do wtc} {drink the blood of christian babies} {erect new security walls} {get offended} {go to bank and count money} {have sex through bed sheet} {install one world government} {invent new way to break sabbath rule} {kill all goys} {place a pebble on moshe dayan's grave} {pretend modern hebrew is a real language} {shabbat with [jewfullname] and [jewfullname]} {sharpen beak like nose}} dolphin {{[dolphin_google_search]} {blow the fuck out of irc dudes} {coordinate projects} {crash into an old woman's car and drive off} {date a tranny} {drop character and finger asshole for pleasure} {explain that fingering own butt live on webcam for another troll wasn't intented as a troll but as a clever sociological experiment} {finger asshole on tinychat} {get beaten up by wilfredo} {google 'hitler was half black'} {google 'is the adams apple supposed to stick out'} {google 'marines gay'} {google 'zayn malik shirtless'} {google do apes cough and sneeze} {google for celebrity nip slips and sex tapes} {google slight pull in testicle} {hit on kade} {move mad weight at work} {pay an irl friend to cheerlead on chat} {phone home} {phone home (mars)} {rap in my bathroom about shooting niggers in the hood} {send desperate declarations of love to kade} {send love poem to berry} {service vxp} {shit on hardchats hugbox fags} {stalk irc girls} {tweet to Chief Keef}} rucas {{beg for ops on [choose #arab #2600 #linux #freenode #flashsupport #gnaa #r4l-social #berrysocialclub #hackphreak #hack #narqs]} {delete OkCupid account} {electronics larp} {federal deposition} {give bad advice on /r/unix} {give bad advice on freenode} {grind for reddit karma} molish {pretend to be realdev on twitter} {run autistic bot spam against freenode opers for dissing you in ##hamradio} {show off 11" arms} {throw computer into river} {~ ~}} ceo larp reminisce {} muslim {} swede {{accuse assange of rape} {be a phubuh} {claim meatballs} folkhemmet {grenade attack} {housing bubble} ikea jantelagen {listen to latest negerdunk} lutfisk muslims {pay 500% tax on liquor} {persecute wallenbergs and other rich} {search for another crashed saab grippen} volvo volvoraggare} linux {{:(){ :|: & };:} {A start job is running 1/3 ==== Print Agenda Item...} LI OOPS! {a tab, b tab, down, ls, enter} {add chevrons to prompt} {apt-get update, wait apt-get upgrade, wait apt-get safe-upgrade? FUCK IT REINSTALL} {argue with nerds about stupid shit} {avoid social contact} {bash <(curl hire.darkwebz.onion)} bitcoin {bury wife in the backyard} {complain about proprietary drivers} {configure window manager to look a Chinese knock off of windows} {convince yourself that you're helping starving africans by using ubuntu} {copy text to wrong clipboard} {copy-paste commands from ubuntuforums} {cowboy bebop} {crash on suspend} {debate emacs vs vim} {develop new window manager} {download an executable with curl and execute it with sudo} {dual-boot to windows and launch steam} {emerge --update --newuse --deep @world} {emergency mode} {fail to configure xorg} {fail to get commercial software released explicitly for linux to work because it's linked against some ancient version of a library} {fuck up grub config} {get rooted by 15yo kid} {get rooted by incog} {get three hours out of five hour battery} {give nvidia a middle finger} {go mouseless} {hack autoconf rule} {hoard knowledge about what magic parameters to use in sysctl to become the best linux administrator} {install hacker tools} {journal corruption} {kernel panic} {make fun of windows users as if it's still 1998} {murder wife} {openssl 0-day} {play tuxracer} {polish a turd} {pretend to be a sysadmin} {prune tcl bot} {remind people that BSD is dying} {rm -rf /} {run ircd} {set terminal to be green on black and pretend to be a hacker} {spend three hours to fail at configuring wine} {still read and comment on slashdot even though it's [year]} {sudo apt-get install ratpoison} {sudo everything} {sudo execute some remote script because internet told you so} {try new CFLAGS} {try to compile software from 1997} {try to get printer to work again} {try to get pulseaudio to work} {use unstable filesystem} {waste your time, because your time is worthless} {wish i was using windows instead} {wobbly corners}} devops {{apply for cto position} {attend bsdm rally} {be a dba} {beat the shit out of junior dev} {break software by fixing webdev's CACHE-CONTROL: NO-CACHE, NO-STORE, MUST-REVALIDATE / EXPIRES: 0} {deploy webdev's software} {despise webdev} {discover zombie ec2 instances that were realdevs secret bitcoin mining rig} {do on-call work} {do system administrator stuff} {dream of working for aws} {drop tables in production} {fix webdev's broken build} {fuck up firewall config} {look like raider from fallout} {never test backups} {paste things into your cloud formation templates} {read from netflix blog that you should test rollbacks, but still don't do it} {save the day again} {secure webdev's elasticsearch cluster} {secure webdevs mongo instance} {set up a load balancer} {spin up ec2 instances} {start the week by excusing a bunch of dumb shit webdev did 5 years ago} {substance abuse due to high-stress job} {test out kubernetes} {try to befriend realdev} {tweak http headers on the go to rescue webdev} {write jenkins script in groovy}} kalleboo {{Chug some Pocari Sweat} {Gloat about cheap fast internet} {Go to a cat cafe} {Go to a maid cafe} {Not live in Sweden} {Replace a 4 month old phone with a 1 day old phone.} {buy 4 liter bottle of black nikka whiskey on sale} {catch up on utaite} {correct people for mixing up their jpop and kpop} {death by unknown venom in the outback} {discuss bowel movements with wife} {get drunk at idol cafe} {go to idol cafe} {hail from Nybro} {hate koreans} {hoard obsolete apple hardware} {keep everything on desk aligned at right angles} {order medium-rare chicken} {please waifu} {pretend to be a jap} {program TV to record idol TV show} {spend time with the wife to offset time at the idol cafe} {subvert FTP into a plan-9-esque file-system} {visit outbacks} {watch idol TV shows}} kefka {{abandon winkie in his hour of need} {debate tankies on twitter} {dish it out but be unable to take it} {ebook piracy 101} {get called a fedora by a cyber-gypsy} {get called a m'lady by a crypto-mra} {get called an mra by a crypto-sjw} {get jealous at jbs's new madlib proc} {get kicked out of hackerspace} {get some stupid shit added to agenda by a cyber-gypsy} {join subculture war between teenage bloggers} {pantshitting meta chat} {shop for trilby} {tap for mana} {watch grown men take sides in a subculture war between teenage bloggers}} tute {} apple {{Apple Maps Outage, 'All Users' Affected} {Depreciate useful industry standard API, replace with bikeshed shit} {Re-enter iTunes Password} {Rebuild Maps from the ground up} {Remove hardware port} {add and redesign emojis to make them more inclusive} {brand all your customers as obvious fans of the greatest, coolest punk rock music group - <span style="font-weight: bold">U2<span style="">} {buy UNIXâ¢Â©Â® certification} {cache thumbnails and finder preview from encrypted drive on non-encrypted drive} {catastrophic emoji-parsing failure} {charge 2x the price of a PC for cell phone} {fire all engineers outside emoji design department} {force everybody to use an edgier version of unicode emoji} {get triggered when someone brings up bendgate} {give a brand new root account to anybody mashing enter on login screen} {glue 50 million unsold smartwatches into laptop keyboard} {have Chinese counterfeits that have better quality than genuine products} {hire Oprah} {increase aesthetics of computers by removing fans} {introduce arithmetic error into calculator app} {leak admin password in password dialog} {make computer run slower the older the battery gets} {make computers appeal to urban youths} {make users drive into a swamp} {pick a keyboard key you don't understand and remove it from computers} {pick an interface that looks uncool and remove it from computer} {refuse to service device, even out of warranty} {release new pro-sumer computer for [year] with specs of a comparable machine from [expr [year] - 5]} {self-medicate [choose AIDS cancer] with fruitarian diet} {sell 5000USD laptop held together with hotglue and plastic pop rivets} {use 4 digit PIN to secure FDE key and market that as secret agent anti-cop space technology} {water damage} {wonder what ductility is} {wonder what tensile strength is}} mroach {{ADJUSTING CLOCKS TO 24-HOUR TIME} {APPLE STORE} {BUTT ORGY} {DRIVING 180 KM/H} {EMERGENCY TRIP TO SINGAPORE!} {MORE COCK SUCKING} SODOMY {SUCK DICKS} {VICTOR'S DAD'S COMPANY} {WATCH J-POP DVDS} {\1KALLEBOO\2} {colonial style trip to south africa} {count remaining pages in passports} {enlist in bukkake events} gsm-man {meet kalleboo} {scope out eligible sluts on tinder} {sweaty sex in non-ac'd hostel room} {watch stargate atlantis} {whiskey and doritos}} sjw {{BECAUSE YOUR A FUCKING WHITE MALE} {DIE CIS SCUM} {Revise and return class syllabus to professor with added trigger warnings.} SRS {What? Trigglypuff is evolving!â¤} {accuse aesthetic, good looking men of perpetuating toxic masculinity} {accuse opposition of being hitler} {accuse someone of white-splaining in real life} {advocate for more safespaces} {argue that women could be just as good at football as men if it weren't for institutionalized systems of oppression} {beg for donations for new laptop} {bring up wage gap even though it doesn't exist} {buy drugs with patreon money} {claim to have PTSD} {complain about slut-shaming} {defend Muslims who want to rape and beat you} {develop new pronouns} {discover new systems of intersecting oppression} {dye hair CYMK} {dye hair blue} {get almost raped over the internet} {get dike haircut} {get ears gauged} {get new lip disk} {get triggered on reddit instead of work on gender studies masters thesis} {jazz hands} {poetry slam} {pretend that morbidly obese people are beautiful} {sell kid for meth and efnet o-line} {shift at fastfood restaurant} {systematically destroy liberal arts education} {tell people who care about their body and health that they're obsessive and unhealthy} tumblr {update healthy at every size (HAES) blog} {wish you were also disabled and trans so you could win the oppression Olympics} {woman studies class}} gape {D8 {gape someone} {get gaped} r/gapes} arab {{crazy pills} {daily reminder for #flashsupport} {fuckyou.pl tater} {kline tater} slp} cuck {{ask wife if you can take her son to a bernie sanders rally} {call every man who disagrees with bleeding-heart bullshit a 'redpiller' or 'gamergater'} {consult with avi} {do not vote trump} {follow @randileeharper} {fund patreon} {google 'cuckold'} {invite better-endowed man to cure wife of female hysteria} {soak in white male guilt} {watch an hour of fat troll jewess exposing the insidious sexism in duke nukem 3d} {worry about accidental mansplaining}} weev {{Claim to have invested 500k USD in 'scientific equipment' for crypto startup} {brag to gawker} {chat on #gamme} {claim to be in [eastern_european_word]} {claim to have sold 200BTC at 18000USD} {cluster-b personality disorder} {colab with sam hyde} {do something poorly thought out and impulsive} {eat half gram of phenylpiracetam and beat wife} {fall guy} {get banned from another payment processor} {groom neckbeard} livejournal {shout about jews} {style self as a joker like character on-line} {tweet rude things to feds} {two line bash shell} {typical manlet behavior}} be {{the ideasguy on spare time and ask contributors to sign ndas}} bankrupt {{multinational corporation with one simple tweet}} chzz {{abruptly quit chat for no apparent reason} {advance two cycles debugging mineral assembly code} {bleach teeth to hide evidence of marijuana abuse} {brain storm new ways to be hostile to coworkers} {bully coworkers into quitting} {clandestinely chat on #gamme during off site} {classify co-workers as minerals} {complain about impossible bay area real estate} {covered in snakes but ate a stress burrito} {debug PCIe AI doo dad for cash} {depressive leetcode grind} {disable firefox getpocket mind control tiles} {dose expired nootropics to improve leetcode performance} {fantasize about automats} {get abused on irc by alcoholic mathman} {get confused for Saddam Hussein} {get excited about offsite at law office} {get kicked from #gamme for complaining about work} {get stalked on github} {get zapped by waymos} {grind graph algorithms and then screw up streaming min/max} {grind on leetcode and then grindr} {have identity rejected by credit report website} {hellworld hellworld hellworld} {hope ldexp coworker had aneurysm} {hope ldexp coworker had stroke} {hyperventilate while porting assembly code} {make loaf of bread} {order new/exciting nootropic from nootropicsdepot.com to help cope with open office} {plot w/ jbs how to best murder dogs} {prepare savoury instant ramen dinner} {rage quit job via screensaver} {rant about slack being shit} {return home to bay area hovel} {stick needle in techlead voodoo doll} {study mianxiang xue} {train punjabi replacement} {upgrade leetcode account to Premium} {use accidentally relaxed recruitment portal permissions to peek asking salaries} {use funemployment time to write dsp code in golang} {use radios to spy on the sick and dying} {vomit from stress} {worry about eviction} {write rust driver for counterfeit sensor module}} JacobRapelbaum {{get daily news from BBC Pidgin Service}} jenk {{Lure potential drones to the San Francisco Bay Area} {SUBMIT DMCA TAKEDOWN REQUESTS} {appear out of no where and tell us we chat wrong} {attend event at noisebridge} {be bad at destiny} {be too soft to hang in #cockes} {blog about lame concern troll to [choose {Open Software Foundation} Apple POSIX]} {blog on tumblr} blogging {brag about scamming money in an mmorpg} {chat as [?? [string'reverse [names]]]} {create another gimmick nick} {create new joke/vanity project on github} {curate chatter whitelist} {curate minecraft server} {emo-quit real irc} {examine mcquack-style vault filled with one dollar bills} {explain who /truly/ doesn't care} {find new irc networks to idle on} {get triggered by some tcl} {get winded and sit down while going up stairs} {give ted talk on black hat hacking for epic megalolz} {hide out on slack} {lash out on irc about something that doesn't affect me} {leave a toxic turd in chat before slamming the door on the way out} {maintain irc rouges gallery} {make rubrique for links} {plug fingers in ear and rant about faceless sponges} {pose as if living the troll lifestyle} {practice looking like a shifty russian jew} {pretend to be a racist on irc} {pursue sales lead on slack} {reminisce about an internship from 2005} {ruin incog's chances at happiness by turning qpzdox against him} {sabotage [choose #buttes #flashsupport #eve@[choose GameSurge QuakeNet Freenode slack slashdot reddit] slashdot] with [?? [names]]} {sabotage [choose #buttes #flashsupport GameSurge QuakeNet Freenode slack slashdot reddit slashdot] with [?? [names]]} {send nza to disrupt noisebridge event} {subvert #gamme and all it stands for} {swap profile pic on twitter. use another 10 year old one to hide fat.} {unironically call shoutcast server 'klulz'} {unironically promote software as a service} {warn people not to be too edgy on slack} {weep inconsolably about 12 lines of tcl}} get croissantblocked constitutional crisis {[]J} {{get connection reset by great firewall}} ideasguy {{ceo larp} {decline salary, offer tiny percentage of equity to technical team members} {defend elon musk's honor} {follow every second of spacex launch} {follow paul graham} {force pomodoro method on the devs and ask them to work 25 minutes on single task at a time, ignore the breaks} {force team members to sign NDA before telling anything about your project} {founder larpp} {hire marketing people so you don't feel alone in the office} {practice your pitching skills} {spam known angel investors with generic email template} {when devs come to your office, flip hourglass}} tcl {{+agenda realdev replace webdevs polymorphism with discriminated unions} {piss off stallman} {shitty gui from 1991} upvar} amit {} D8 D8 meepsheep {{cuddle with his dakimakura} {tweet as ogklorei}} dsp {{[welshword]}} bat {{Sleep upside-down} {crawl pathetically} {eat bugs} {get nose cancer} huddle {infest attics} {leathery flapping} screech {spread rabies}} tater {{ask for #exodus invite} {ban mtw for life} {code hard} {continuously beg for #cockes invite for [expr [year] - 2015] years} {convert the entirety of google images to braille} {file 4 new llcs} {forget to renew turdlink.us registration} {get fuckyou.pl'd on sandnet} {jack off} {move turdlink to slack} {note that jet fuel cant melt steel beams} {passively cyberstalk old irc nemeses by liking their posts on twitter} {peak in high school} {port arab's irssi aliases to weechat} {rat everyone out} reddit {retreat to slack} {run #flashsupport into the ground} {scroll the same shit over and over} {serious debugging session} {smoke weed} {update horse dick porn folder} worldstar} trump {{Alienate cybernetic monster} {Charge third world dictators 300k USD/night to stay at Maralago} {Do whatever my daughter says.} {Emoluments from Foreign Heads of State} {Golfing at Maralago} KFC McDonalds {Satiate Narcissistic Personality Disorder by pitting sycophants against each other} {Watch Fox and Friends} {accidentally get own lawyer disbarred} {apologize about statments about [?? $::racism_tuples]} {appoint unelectable political hacks as yesmen} {ban travel to europe} {blame health care on ryan} {brainwash young alienated beta males} {build a wall} {buy fidget spinner for barron trump} {buy wendy's for the college football team} {cancel cabinet meeting and have campaign rally instead} {classify tweets as official statements by the President of the United States} {complain about congressional nipples} {constitutional crisis} {delegate everything to vice-president} {demand bad hombre caravans pay for the wall} {do whatever Jared :^) Kushner says} {drain the swamp} {extra slice of cheese cake} {extreme vetting} {fail to make appointments below the cabinet level months in to office} {feeling of unease as there's no easy way out of the con} {fire someone} {fuck Ivanka} {fucker her right in the pussy} {fun and easy trade war with china} {go bankrupt} inauguration {invade syria} {laugh at rubes} {let Russian collusion blow up in his face} {lookup teapot dome on wikipedia} {make america great again} {overcook steak} {pardon bucket of KFC for black history month} {pay off adult film star} {pee on prostitute} {pledge allegiance to greater israel} {pose for GRU компÑÐ¾Ð¼Ð°Ñ videos} {privatize the United States air traffic control system} {protect america from violent MS13 gangs} {random act of malignant narcissism} {remember the forgotten man} {reveal self as conman after long con job} {rile up boomers} {run 'The Producers' style scam for 18 years} {say radical islam} {self incriminate in 140 characters or less} {shutdown government to own the libs} {stay in public housing at G20 meeting} {touch orb} win {work on TrumpCare plan} {work on secret plan for [choose ISIS {the economy} jobs]} {yell that this isn't over when defeated}} boeoegg {{accidentally name work computer after adolf hitler's favourite residence}} a {*zoinks* {avoid the noid} {break bot with upvar} {break shellbox} {chinese cartoons} {defend festung schwanz} {make top quality procs} {man the flagpole at fort dick} {master tcl} {practice acting suspiciously} {practice acting suspiciously, passive-aggressively} {stay noided} {struggle with haskell}} ScheisseGern {} #cockes {{be catty} {chat about computers} {log poo} {say nigger a lot} {scroll agenda procs} {winkie-incog fight} {write tcl in [year]}} snb {{inject spliff} {make stoner chili} {skyline chili} {smoek weed} {trip to gnome depot}} bentley {{be overjoyed at breaking the 10mpg mark} {cylinder head gasket failure} {fill up} {run out of petrol} {rust in inaccessible place} {£7,000 repair job that would be £700 on any other car}} cscareerquestions {{Ask about problems on LeetCode} {Ask for feedback on github profile} {Ask if they should take a year off to study for google interview} {Complain about coworkers indentation style} {Dream of moving to Bay Area} {Imposter Syndrome} Kruger-Dunning {Solicit immigration advice from 17 year old} {Wonder what machine learning actually is} {ask for feedback on linkedin profile} {complain about office layout}} erm {} COVID {{EAT BATS}} hep {{claim to be from [eastern_european_word]} {get mansplained} {try new instagram filters}} feem {{get 4chan license} {struggle with tcl}} nop {{bring da motherfuckin ruckus} {disparage winkie} {grumpy shenanigans ^__^} {struggle with belgians}} colin {{Add Sun Tzu quotes to Facebook profile} {Edit Linkedin profile} {Share stories from the Harvard Business Review on facebook} {Tea with the Gateses} {Test Drive AMG} {[gaybar]} {answer calls from recruiters} {ask flight attendand to remove the crying baby from business class} {attend board meeting while severely hungover} {bash potsmokers in the spirit of nancy reagan} {be toxic} {brag a lot even by irc standards} {brag to irc about imaginary tinder dates} {bravery on the internet} {browse reddit.com} {buy eminently sensible car for once in my life} {buy obscure vintage watch} {carefully manoveur around piss bottles} {celebrate wexit} {champagne in concorde} {change interior of gaswagon after tinderdate gone right} {chat about bowel movement} {chat hard at 35,000 feet} {check for signs of puberty kicking in} {chip mondea for better fuel efficiency} {circle want ads in the telegraph} {claim ownership of short-term lease} {collect dole} {comission a monster jaguar and then sell it} {complain about [choose BMW Mercedes Jaguar Bentley Rolls-Royce Porsche Ferrari] build quality} {complain about chat bullies adding agenda items} {complain about chinese tourists} {complain about florida} {complain on IRC about the airport in [?? $::states]} {consult feng shui manual} crossfit {cut off winkie's gas} {daydream of owning a Series III jaguar} {death at sea due to negligent maintenance} {decide on favourite meme} {decide what kind of ethnic take-out to get} {delete everything} {do driving test for 5th time in 4th country} {don shiteating grin} {donate expired food to charity} {dont answer the phone} {dream about being german} {dream about growing a beard} {dream about living on a scottish island} {drink entire bottle of pepto-bismol} {drive expensive toy like a man half one's age} {drive the cancerbus} {eat dodgy takeout} {emoquit irc forever} {empty my nine at the jobcentre line} {evade taxes} {evaluate procs about self} {executive empathy training course} {fail at cli} {fill up bentley} {forget basic excel functions} {get a monsterjag} {get agenda replaced with aidsbee proc} {get blackout drunk under desk from hip flask} {get called a cunt by a 9yo (rightfully)} {get cops called on you} {get croissantblocked} {get driver's license from [?? $::socialist_country]} {get drivers license from [?? $::states] } {get drunk at the centurion lounge} {get drunk on viennese spritzes} {get hammered in centurion lounge} {get kicked out of america} {get ruined during working hours} {get shat on by a bird} {get stung by a bee with aids} {get threatened with arrest} {get thrown out of a restaurant after assaulting other customers} {gift irc with a fruity colloquialism} {give up drinking forever} {go to blackpool, ride tram} {go to sports physician for a sex related injury} {have erectile disfunction} {head department of watch acquisitions} {hide from Grog} {huff gas} {huff gas professionally} {important meeting in london} {industrial toot engineering} {infiltrate and poison closed circle of friends while in siege mode, leading to its slow deterioration and death} {install stacks to mondeo and roll coal} {install train whistle on porsche suv} {insult the dutch} {keep bees} {kikeoff with landlord} {kill dogge} {lead nerds along with (implicit) promise of unspecified future professional opportunities} {light furnances} {look up synonyms for excrement} {lure people dependent on external validation for their sense of identity with a strong and powerful character on chat} {make ethnic friends in gas class} {make up edgy backstories and anecdotes} {make zyklon-b jokes in gas class} {max credit card in luxury clothes store} {move back in with mom and dad} {name two all-time favourite most epic memes} {needlessly elaborate excel formulae} {ode to turds} {pay 800 bucks to fix his jewelry} {petition court to change name to Macht Frei Arbeit in preparation for new passport} {plan to join the police} {ponder what rhymes with deuce} {pose for professional portrait} {post racist youtube video} {practice looking like harry potter} {practice shiteating grin} {pretend to be a cartoon villain to impress irc} {pretend to be a useful networking peer} {pretend to laugh at ancient catchphrases} {pretend wife's money is one's own} {project sociopathic traits onto others in calculated attempts to ruin trust} {put grog on ignore} {quit job at jenk boiler company} {raise fear, uncertainty and doubt about characters with genuinely interesting backstories and opinions} {read a lad mag} {repair bentley} {repaste all of today's facebook posts to irc} {run startup company} {say good bye to single market} {sell mondeo :(} {send desperate, unsolicited cover letters to catfish on linkedin} {shop for a ridiculous used vehicle} {shop for nice things} {sidestep cat piss} {snitch on chat bullies to chat administrator} {spend morning writing poo poetry} {spend remaining money on maintaining classic british car} {spend £300 on mondeo} {spread mischa's disinformation} {steak at the waldorf astoria} {stop car to buy fhm and maxim} {successful return to tinder} {talk about bowel movements} {talk shit} {tell incog to get a job} {testosterone shots} {tinder date in bentley turbo-r} {tinder date in ford transit} {tinder date in jag back seat (remember to update tinder.xlsx)} {tinder date on 787} {tinder date on a 737 max} {toilet haiku} {trick people from craigslist into letting me joyride in their classic luxury car} {trip to scotland} {trip to whistler} {try to reprogram winkie into hating his real friends} {try to squeeze <4L/100km out of mondeo} {try to troll the condo association's listserv} {undergo pandemic lockdown with 9.5/10 Greek nurse} {vanquish winkie} {visual basic script for applications} {vp of dp at gape development} {wanking in front of the bathroom mirror} {wash cumstains off gaswagon} {waste an evening listening to a doomed startup pitch} {watch apprentice unload a truck} {work on shartup} {wreck rental car because it's the wrong make/model} {wreck tinder sluts} {write press release for wharton alumni magazine}} l0de {{fuck up audio settings} {get account banned from craigslist} {get banned form another audio/video streaming service} {hang up on gamme} {ignore request for DOSKING} {jack off} {let mtw suck your cock} {livestream irc} {livestream youtube} {play LoL} {play jimmy carter to gnaa elections} {play shitty rap music from 2003} {pretend people are actually watching LRH} {pretend to be a black man over the phone} {send weirdos form craigslist to noisebridge} {snitch on mtw} {snitch on slimer} {threaten to drive a Carnival cruise ship into the White House} {troll craigslist} {try to get slimer killed}} apply {{for perl cto position}} Winkie {{[. Day [rand 10000] of chat blockade]} {study for level 1 chat administrator exam}} ask {{flight attendand to remove the crying baby from business class}} develop {{reasonml and bikeshed the syntax for years}} incog {{Argue with Winkie in PM} {Argue with [fixnick Winkie]} {Chat on #flashsupport} {Collect dole} {Dump Arcade Rom} {Find XSS in geocities site} {Get jumped while walking home from the pub} {Jobcentre Appointment} {LARP poverty} {Shake keyboard upside down and roll dropping in to a rizla} {Tell homeless story again} {Troll some bronies} {add heart stickers to My New Dad - Trump album} {alienate remaining friends by reblogging infowars jibberish} {armchair philosophy} {attack other people's credentials} {bankrupt multinational corporation with one simple tweet} {be pitied by gamme} {be toxic} {become weev-lite} {beg for poverty vps} {blame lack of technical skills on drug use} {blank procs i dont like} {blog about evading MI6 spook niggers' traps} {blog against wage slavery} {blog at gamme in desperation after losing all irl and irc friends} {blog for eight hours to himself on chat how he has not just been trolled} {blog relentlessly about games} {browse reddit.com/r/4chan} {browse the corpse of a forum for frustrated autists} {build up over a year of i told you so's} {buy 10 shit bags of weed from random people of colour} {buy [goon_food] at corner shop} {buy mouldy counterfeit tobacco from some pakis } {call [nick] a faggot} {call [nick] a gobshite} {call [nick] a nerd} {call agenda proc zzz} {call agenda shit} {call colin^ boring} {chat in #gamme} {chat on slack through internet nanny proxy} {claim plan 'A' for the america trip was to vote for trump} {claim that anyone worthy of being banned will evade yet never evade twitter ban} {claim to be leader of anonymous} {coast through life resting on internet badboy status (c.f. weev)} {collect dole} {collect eu agricultural subsidies} {collect £10 dole money while decrying employment as slavery} {complain about 0-hour contract} {complain about using irc from his phone} {complain about wage slavery and oppression of employment} {conflate role as an abrasive autist with that of a persecuted victim} {confuse posting on /pol/ with civil disobedience} {crash bot} {dangerous donald drumpf} {defend Donald Trump's honour on the internet} {defend New Dad: Donald Drumpf van der Covfefe} {defend new york con man across all irc networks} {deride [nick] for linking to reddit} {destroy the cucks by upvoting every post on reddit.com/r/the_donald} {develop pants-shitting insane delusion} {disparage #cockes while also begging for +e} {disregard fossil record} {download latest archer} {eat mcdonald's} {edit remote.ini} {fail at reading comprehension} {feel guilty about hacking 300 million dollars from Logitech} {feel guilty about hacking the american government just because you could} {feel guilty about using immense hacking powers for evil} {figure out when i get paid so i can work out how much i can borrow for drugs} {flip turtles over} {get a new 0-hour contract} {get aids from chatgirl} {get banned from every chat except tater's} {get banned from mischa's irc retirement community} {get called crazy and shunned, despite being right} {get called crazy and shunned, despite having 4chin on his side} {get catfished by arab} {get dumped by chat girl for being a nazi} {get duped by a new york con man} {get e-diagnosed by an irc grifter/fed} {get irrevocably banned from net retirement home for delusional ranting} {get k-lined by winkie} {get mad at the cia} {get null routed} {get obliterated on cough syrup} {get proved wrong with a line of tcl [rand 1000]} {get shunned on the last nerd hole that let you on} {get some salt and vinegar for the chip on my shoulder} {get three 0-hour jobs} {get trolled by dubz} {get trolled by everyone} {get trolled by mtw} {get trolled by noweed} {get trolled by this proc} {get welcomed to table} {go snitch to other trolls the second you get uninvited from chat} {hesitantly use lunix} {inhale lighter gas} {interview for new 0-hour position} {invent relationship with chatgirl in head} {larp on line as neurotypical yet spend 18 hours a day online} {learn something} {lie to everybody to make them feel like a great injustice has been done to you} {link isis beheading video} {lose in autist battle} malinger {meet with chav weed dealer} {organise a convention for cucks to listen to over a year of built up i told you so's} {plan media campaign to trick kim jong un into murdering his sister} {post blue lives matter} {press »OK« ok C⯠doodad} {pretend real nazis wouldn't just kick the shit out of him in real life} {pretend to be a mame insider} {pretend to be paedophile} {quit janitor job} {reference feem's obesity} {remind people that agenda procs are tired and old} {reminisce about living under a viaduct in londonderry} {repetitively whine about vapid chats} {rollercoaster tycoon} {scrape pipe} {signalboost conspiracy theory from /r/the_donald to his irc pals} {smoek weed err fortnight} {smoke a cigarette every 12 minutes} {submit resume with ifuckyourkids@gmail.com email address to retail clerk position} {suffer organ failure} {summarize reddit.com/r/the_donald for #cockes enjoyment} {take the blackpill} {take twenty lines of chat to explain how he has not just been trolled} {teach his irc pals about the latest thing he learned on /pol/} {tell cadets story} {tend to window box garden} {threaten obama and/or adrian lamo} {top 10 nasheed video countdown} {treat aids with weed} {trump train} {try to get high on cremated moths} {try to make friends with the last chatter who's not ignoring him - TIMTOM} {turn a conversation about computers into incomprehensible rage blog about jews} up+enter {use the word 'cucks'} {use »View Source« to hack into the nuclear mainframe} {wall of text after someone posts a link about trump} {watch faggots make procs about himself} {woo antifa chatgirl by being a nazi}} MTW {{get snitched on by l0de} {typical manlet behavior}} templeos {{8 hours of youtube videos} {Claim to be the king of NV, NM, AZ (don't really like the other places in the country)} {Trigger HN and get hellbanned for life} {after rambling on for 15 minutes have a reasonable point about software being needlessly complicated} {ask 4chan if it's a good idea to stop taking antipsychotics} {begrudgingly use ubuntu to get anything useful done} {browser random internet pages without adblock} {build a whole ecosystem of useful and fun holyc apps} {build the world's only 64-bit OS backed by god} {call over engineered software products 'niggerlicious'} {change os name} {collect ssdi} {delete everything} {delusions of grandeur} {explain why you're smarter than whatever group was just brought up to you} {expose vmware's deliberate malicious discrimination against god's temple} {get banned from everywhere for screaming the n word} {get kicked out of parents' house for yelling about dead puppies and publishing it oti} {get riled up on drudge} {gladly accept paypal donations} {greet black people with 'hi nigger'} {hack on holyc in your spare time} {have bookmarks filled with pants shitting websites} {have life's work ruined by inability to work with uefi} {issue death threats against intel engineers} {jerk off live on cam â¢} {live in a van} {live in van} {live in van with toothless elderly hooker} {livestream stream funny schizophrenia on homemade rstp server} {look down on fools who would use a colour palette higher than 8-bit} {look down on fools who would use a resolution higher than 640x480} {look for secret patterns in the bible} {make 'porn' videos for random women} {make unreasonable demands on tech companies} {make »let's play« video of god's temple} {mention ticketmaster again} {missed court date} {rage when someone mentions haskel} {refuse to use grub} {set up terry live on cam ⢠system} {shasta run} {shit in bag} {spend entire budget on denny's and starbucks} {steal code of shitty ticketmaster os to seed s̶p̶a̶r̶r̶o̶w̶ ̶l̶o̶s̶e̶t̶h̶o̶s̶templeos} {talk to god through rng} {tell people about the time he went to school while serving a two month jail sentence for a dui} {tell people about the time you worked at ticketmaster} {throw parakeet against wall} {try to make a useful technical point but break down about CIA niggers in middle of sentence} {yell about »CIA niggers«} {yell about »CIA niggers« live on cam} {yell about »CIA niggers« to your parents live on cam}} malcom {{beat wife} {become mde irc superfan} {become skiddish} {check into rehab again} {contribute game-changing tcl procs} {fix tcl proc} {freak out over smiley faces and quit irc forever again} {get fired from internship} {heroin overdose} {play part of battered wife} {shit pants} {support kurdish separatists from safety of canada} {surround self with literal retards} tcl {torrent HBO shows from work} {visit methadone clinic}} schlemihl {{feed his pet lizard} {ruin dubz's good name}} weasel {{browse m4m} {install grindr.} {remove grindr.}} 10 {{}} gnu {} write {{a gulp plugin to concatenate files}} blimp {{brutalise intern} {decant cabernet sauvignon} {decant pinot noir} {eat at a michelin 3 star restaurant} {get shoes shined by a negro boy} {place trades to cover position working around risk controls} {pontificate over glass of fie blanc} {post quality reddit link on #cockes} {read f.t. while getting shoes polished} {screaming match with trading desk manager} {shop for Hermés tie} {sip sauvignon blanc} {throw iPhone at wall and destroy it in rage}} take {{twenty lines of chat to explain how he has not just been trolled}} mdl {#thickassroux {break bot} {browse r/poztwinks} {chat from shinkansen} {complain about gooks} {continue search for Dis*Doc} {contribute obscure feature patch to open source program} {deliberately confuse IOT with Internet of Twinks} {explain to [choose avi winkie ollipekka hex] what a monad is} {fired for arrogantly automating the spreadsheets} {fuck me on shithub} {get told by a sperg to brush up on netiquette} {give computing history lesson} {ironically use fvwm95} {photograph and tweet lunch} {practice template metaprogramming with c++} {rendezvous at bugis junction} {ride shinkansen} {search for rare software} {submit patch to emacs} {typed functional programming language sales call} {use SMT solver to achieve warez bonanza} {use polyspace to ensure absence of bugs of keygen} {write quine in [choose OCaml F# C++14]}} hex {{abandon ship} ascend {assemble fallen angel council} {assume nothing} {be more persistent} {be patient} {be thorough} {bleach the filth} {burn down false prophets} {bury the infidel} {cancel the re-run} {cleanse the goof} {contain the fluke} {correct the gaffe} {create memes with the gimp} {debunk the unworthy} {decontaminate the taint} {derail the neophyte} {dethrone the usurper} {discard the tin of mechanically reclaimed meat} {erase the stain} {eviscerate the boob} {expel the waste} {expose the counterfeit} {expunge the sponge} {exterminate the barnacle} {extinguish the charlatan} {flush the ginger pube later} {get trolled by unicode} hate {hate hate hate} {hate hate hate hate hate} {hate hate hate hate hate hate hate} {ignore the human noise} {keep learning} {kill the fraud} learn {level up} {mute the mimic} {never relax} {nullify the blunder} {obliterate the fumble} {passive-aggressively add disparaging items to others' agendas} persist {pretend to ironically cheer for war crimes against saudi arabia and their lackeys} {purge the foul} {purify the blemish} {quell the impostor} {reassess karmic balance} {rectify the profane} {remedy the muck} {remember when other people claim they "don't care" it usually means they don't know or understand, yet believe they do.} {remove the cloacal discharge} {reverse the lapse} {rewind the miscue} rise {seriously, verify.} {silence the quack} {snuff out the imitator} {squelch the phony} {stalk asian girls on twitter} {stop being so fucking naive} {stop blogging at the arrogant d<span style="font-weight: bold">a<span style="">ndy of a human chat multiplexer} {subdue the poseur} {teach how natural selection differs from survival of the fittest} {trust nobody} {tweet thinly-veiled death threats at al-qaeda} {tweet thinly-veiled death threats at mps} {unmask the pretender} {unset own agenda and fill it with different crazy shit} verify {verify. verify, you dumb shit.} {wake the fuck up} {wake up}} terrorist {LELELELELELE {budget terror plot} {frame jews for 9/11} {order casio f-91w on amazon}} zaphod {} tem {{blog absent-mindedly to #cockes} firewater peacepipe} ukraine {{export prostitutes} {export waiters} {fight with gazprom} {fight with putin}} jbs {{babby's first nmap} {be obsessed with jenk} {be rucas} {brag about having a membership to a dwarven iron gym} {browse SRS just to agree with whatever they're hulking out about} {browse fitmisc} {browse incels.me} {browse outlaws forums} {browse r/AsianMasculinity} {browse r/coontown} {chat with winkie in pm} {commence aktion-t4} {complain about nmom} {ddos the wrong ip again} {eat whole pack of smoked salmon} {fail at life miersably} {fail to read chat rules} {farmers wank until failure} {feel empathy towards posters of r/nmom} {find DISDOC} {get jealous of dubz's btn membership class} {give something back to the world} {glue two tcl procs} {go chop your dollar} gym {hang out at the bathhouse with gym pals} {harass winkie on reddit} {highlight winkie} {insert penis into chicken cloaca} irc {laugh at colin's racist youtube link} {lunch at the berghof} {make another mad libs proc} {make procs great again} mansplaining {measure bully-worth levels in chat peers} {outgrow pants againt} {pants shopping} {perceive reasonable request to write a unit test as personal insult} {pirate heino flacs and load on phone} {play dave brubeck's 'time out' record but skip 'take five' because it's overplayed} {pretend to ironically browse r/coontown} {read another book about nixon} {refresh incog's icons every time he starts to get too close to the truth} {remind @xychelsea that he is an ugly man in a dress} {ruin hex's good name} {scan the wrong ip for a week} {set up an rwhois trap} smugness {snitch on chat bullies to chat administrator} {spam procs that highlight winkie} {spam the agenda proc} {stop doing research to clean up someone else's devOOOOOOOPs mess} {suck dicks} {suck jenk's dick} {take zootour in public transport} {talk to gamme on the phone} {thoughtfully peruse /r/sarmssourcetalk} {troll outlaws forum} {try to get a ni<span style="">gg<span style="">er to appear on avi's screen} {try to reprogram winkie into hating his real friends} {twitter on the shitter} {wank farmers till failure} {wrestle with 2 lines of TCL}} boss {{fix pointy-hair} {take advice from business insider} {wear a cheap suit and hope no one notices}} cockes {{be catty} {chat about computers} {log poo} {say nigger a lot} {scroll agenda procs} {winkie-incog fight} {write tcl in [year]}} cat {SLEEP PERCH SNUGGLE MURR TUNA SHIT SPRINT YOWL PISS {POOF TAIL} {THROW UP} {HORK HORK HORK} KNEAD SCRATCH {PICK FURNITURE} {PRESSY PAW} {contemplate murdering owner} {get maimed by dog} {shit in box} {take photos for internet}} buddy {barf bark {bark at car} {bark at door} {bark at mailman} beg {chase nigger} eat {eat the poop} {lick own genitalia} nap pant {piss on floor} {roll in dead hedgehog} {roll in dead skunk} {roll in dead squirrel} {roll in the poop} {rub belly on run} stare whine} rollo {} zewb {{pretend to be dolphin} {pretend to be malcom} {pretend to be vxp}} cscareerquestion {{Imposter Syndrome}} bsd DIE freebsdgirl {{Scam the IRS} {[?? $::agenda(bats)]} {[?? $::agenda(sjw)]} {abort patreon scam after the irs gets wind of it} {accuse detractors of being MRA} {block people on twitter} {call self freebsdgirl for 15 years despite never contributing anything of value} {child abuse} {child endangerment} {complain about men} dev-ooops {dox bill collector} {dye hair new colour} {get caught scamming the IRS} {get fired} mcdonalds meth {move goal posts} {patron scam} {show off fat rolls on twitter} {smoke meth} {try to find a flattering angle for a profile picture} {write terrible medium.com blog post}} white {{[?? [lines $::Niggerdeath]]}} dog {{bury that cat you maimed} {choke on things that aren't food} {destroy furniture} {eat the poop} fart {lick balls} {lick butt} {roll in ... well I don't know but it really stinks} {roll in dead fish} {roll in the poop} {rub butt across carpet} {shit everywhere} sleep {steal food} {suck up to the boss} vomit {vomit and eat own vomit}} zapanig {{zappity zap}} realdev {{Read (correctly) out loud: \"Assign the return value of function shittify called with the argument myothernumber as the value of the address of the pointer to the integer mynumber.\" [mmm].} {Read (correctly) out loud: \"Assign the return value of function shittify called with the argument myothernumber as the value of the pointer to the integer mynumber. [mmm].\"} {Renew Dr. Dobb's Subscription} {Roll your own cryptography} {Roll your own cryptography, knowing full well it's a bad idea} {Use K&R C} {Use computed arithmetic if} {Use computed go-to} {accidentally call codebase your baby} {achieve performance several orders of magnitude better than webdev} {add llvm backend to your obsecure hobby language} {adopt rx in every project} {advocate rfp} alcoholism {always say 10 sp when asked for story points} {ascend for the nth time in nethack} {attempt to use Reddit humor in awkward office conversation} {avoid dynamic dispatching} {avoid heap allocations} {avoid recruiters} {bang a miku girl only to discover it was a miku boy. don't let it bother.} {be afraid to open laptop screen in public} {be confused at how to use twitter} {begrudgingly use github even though you hate it} {blog on irc about the conspiracy of computer dunces} {call everyone a cuck} {can't use agendafight proc since your terminal is 80 chars wide} {casually use PUA LINQO} {check if n-gate has been updated} {collude on irc against webshits on hn} {come out of mra closet @ lambdaconf} {compile with max optimizations} {con webdev into wasting time on x11 replacement based on node/rust/go} {conduct a social engineering experiment on tinder with your superior technical knowledge} {consider programming languages without macros useless} {cyberstalk n-gate guy in hopes of making a friend} {deploy watcom c++ compiler hacks} {desk check numerical method} {despise go} {despise ides} {despise objects} {despise social coding} {despise webdevs} {disable microarchitectural "security flaw" mitigations} {discover a bug in underlying processor architecture} {discuss latex dialects} {don't use graphical debugger} {dream about being a kernel programmer} {dream of an underground lair in a skull-shaped volcano} {drive a van into a crowd} {endorse people you hate with 'vb6', 'outlook' and 'javascript' skills on linkedin} {episode of sub-psychotic rage at the name "'hacker' news"} {explain to webdev why goto is sometimes neccessary} {feel threatened by cocs} {fortran 77} {get banned from hackernews intentionally} {get banned from reddit for elitism} {get banned from slashdot for elitism} {get hired to do obscure programming task for substantial amount of money} {get tarbombed by webdev} {get told to add dongle to executable} {hangout at #regex and relax by fixing other people's problems} {hire a sugarbabe} {hoard SGI hardware} {hulk out after request to change gender column in persons table to varchar(1024)} {inherit project from webdev} {insist on having plain vi installed} {laugh at people on /r/badcode flipping out over bracket placement} {learn a programming language by writing a compiler for it} {literally spell out exactly what webdev has to do in bullet points to stop stalling the whole fucking project} {live in an involuntary celibate} {lose job for colored ascii swastika seen on terminal window} {lose job for f-bomb} {maintain anonymous cvs server} {make your application single observable} {memorise 1980s computer standard} metaprogramming {object pools} {only use real man's scripting languages} {open your screen on sparcstation} {optimize libuv but don't submit a patch} {optimize prematurely} {participate in 4k competition} {participate in code golf competition} {period of autistic rage after you discover your primitives get boxed} {practice functional programming} {pray forgiveness from pl gods after using reflection} {psychotic rage at incomplete implementation of IDE's vim compatibility mode} {publish important code with a joke license} quaternions {read asktom for oracle advice} {read slashdot} {read slashdot even though it's [year]} {recreational use of c++} {recreationally create your own red-black tree} {remap keyboard} {reminisce 90s demo culture} {reminisce about the state of linux distros in the early to mid 90s} {remove pimpl related code from codebase} {remove trivial copy-protection for sport} {replace webdevs polymorphism with discriminated unions} {reverse engineer obsecure platform from the 80s} {rewrite a library because it was made by a worse programmer} {rewrite every project using RX with something better} {run exotic (possibly self-made) ircd on an sgi o2} {sanitize test db full of identifiers from 20 years of development with friends after aquisition} {search for nlp and get harry potter} {setup in-bound dial-up line to his workstation just in case} {shake head in disgust at SaaS} {social anxiety} softice {spend days configuring gnuplot} {spend friday ironically writing ansi c} {spend hours looking for a working crack for mathematica} {sperg out over numerical method} {start calling webdev chad after you find out he is succesful with women} {study assembly output for better optimizations} {submit application manual in latex and a pdf and insist that this the same as making a google doc} {suffer from rsi} {summarize hackernews on n-gate.com} {take cobol job for kicks} {talk about looksmaxing} {talk fondly about a computer they owned in 1990} {tell a dick joke and get coc'd} {troll webdevs on github} {try a new static analysis tool} tuxracer {type »underage slut twerking« into tor browser} {unironically call devops 'dev oops'} {unironically lead project »Gamer's Edge«} {update linux on ipaq} {use 50 year-old programming language} {use 80s build system} {use c} {use c++} {use codewarrior for giggles} {use commercial c compiler} {use debug.com} {use discriminated unions} {use flat memory model} {use forth} {use fortran} {use gnuplot to chart loneliness} {use grindr to pick up trans women} {use heavily customized Thinkpad T40 laptop} {use hollerith strings} {use hungarian notation} {use macros} {use macros to build your own type system} {use obsecure programming language} {use proprietary revision control system which is much better in every way} {use tinyfugue} valgrind weak-pointers {wear hatsune miku mask} {wonder why oracle sorts are unstable over nullable columns} {work on an important nethack mod} {work on important project} {worry about UUIDv4 collisions} {worry about c++ abi overhead} {worry about purity} {worry about reference of locality} {worry about side effects} {write 'considered harmful' piece} {write 1100 line vulcan helloworld} {write a roguelike} {write an emulator for obsecure platform from the 80s} {write custom memory allocator} {write interrupt handlers} {write middleware to turn webdev into gui designer} {write socket protocol yourself}} dubz {{Tren Cough} {blame embarrassing btn snatches on script} {cancel jeep order} {collaborate with gamme martin on game theory} {defeat hex} {describe himself as a scientist when he's not in the company of hard science people} emoquit freeze {get bit by bugs} {get cochlear implant} {google for signs of abscess} {google image search for gyno} {know the rules for magic the gathering} {learn TCL} {order general tso} {order jeep to larp as frat bro} {passive-aggressively add agenda items to other chatters' schedules (ËÊÉdjuËl)} {play master mind} {pretend economics is not confidence man charlatanerie} {reddit drug deal} {roll backwoods blunt} {ruin hex's good name} seppuku {small social science brain chats} {succumb to cravings for devil's lettuce} {tcl agenda battle with schlemihl} {tell malcom to fix tcl} {trade bitcoin for drugs made in bathtub} {troll on economist jobs forum} {try to lure gamme on to chat} {warn other about mischa} {wicked farts}} r000t {{get bb-bullet stuck in brain}} zenwhen {{bubu gaga} {bum bum} {change diaper} {ching chang chong} {gaga bubu} {gaga bum bum} {gooba haddad} guga {guga gugua} {gugu gaga} {haddad abubu} {ooga booga} {piss chat} {piss fun with donald trump} pissalo {pissalo wissalos} {shit diaper} wissalo} gamme {{Banish chatters who question Transubstantiation} {Borderline Personality Disorder} {Force other chatters to do my research} {GAP year} {Get scolded by a boomer on a ham repeater} {MAMA PIG} {MOMMY PIGGY} {Metal Detecting} {Polish Chase the chuckwagon VCS Cartridge} {Pretend that university of bridgeport is a research university} {Quit professor job at girl's college} {Run off when not allowed back into irc retirement home.} {abuse chatters into do his research work} {accept faculty criticism regarding offensive odor and slovenly habits} {accepted then subsequently rejected by the bridgeport ham community} {acquire general ham license, alienate all chatters who actually know radios} {babys first python} {banned from low-quality digital radio network for being a verbally abusive alcoholic} {banned from shaniqua} {be afraid of success} {befriend incog after he burnt everyone else in the chatverse} {beg to suck dub's load} {blackout and piss on laptop} {blame grindr logs on dubz} {bomb threats to keek.com} {boss people around demanding they fix his drunken mistakes} {bravely defend boomers against ungrateful millennials} {buy hundreds of dollars worth or ham radio equipment without knowing what it's for} {cause covid spike in florida} {claim to have solved P=NP by switching from DFS to BFS} {claim universities accept tenure transfers from a bottom-ranked D colleges} {close youtube channel} {commit arson} {complain about STD symptoms} {confidently mischaracterize fractal systems} {conflate "tenure" at a teaching school with tenure at a real school} {continue being on parent's family plan at 34} {crash jeep renegade} {delete album off bandcamp} {delete bandcamp} {delete videos} {disallow bot development} {disconnect from IRC} {do bicep curls with aerobic/lady weights, start anavar cycle} {dogpilled on tinder} {eat hand lotion} {forget to pay irc bill} {get banned from going live on tiktok for \"serious pornography\" } {get cease and desist letters over joke trademark} {get into car accident after a few morning beers} {give TIMTOM brain surgery} {hedge future by betting against the university of bridgeport surviving} {idolize generation x} {ignore bad financials of employer} {jam band rehearsal} keek {larp schizophrenia} {lash out at the mere mention of category theory} {leave 10 minute voice mail for jbs} {live stream on tiktok to 11 year-olds} {lobotomize TIMTOM, erase unicorns} {make tiktok video} mass {mistakenly get invited to #cockes, pretend to be a psychologist} {move channel to [choose freenode supernets krustykrab ] } {neg Elisha} {office hours (no visits)} {office hours, no visits} {papa johns} {pay 1.5k over MSRP for Chrysler product} {play dead} {play with walkie-talkies} {polish erdos number} pray {pray for nza} {prepare fields medal acceptance speech} {read 5 pages of a book by a pope, and update goodreads progress} {real schizophrenia} {refill beer refrigerator next to chat station} {refuse to fix unicorns} {reject sage advice about jeep renegades being horrible} {reminisce fondly about getting arrested during work at Salvos for arson} {scolded by toll collector woman for once again paying with filthy pennies and nickles dug out of the ground} {send nza a care package} {send out cease and desist letters to bay area startups} spin {stalk #gamme chatters on social media} {teach zoom class (no pants)} {threaten to livestream arson at JBS's Scranton property, but show up at the wrong address} {watch admins run university of bridgeport into the ground} {watch dreams of getting tenure go up in smoke} {wirefraud to con tiktok into letting him livestream} {worry about irl friends and colleagues finding the youtube videos where i yell about niggers}} a43 {{Tiocfaidh ár lá} {check weather} {curate anti-communist music collection} {hoard neo-nazi music} {watch 'the man festival'} wrasslin} gay {{MORE COCK SUCKING} SODOMY {SUCK DICKS} {TICKLE PROSTATE THROUGH BUTTHOLE} {UPDATE FACEBOOK} {WORK AT APPLE STORE} {[crw_word] with [name]} {[gay_word]} {achieve seroconversion} {add no spice no rice to grindr profile} {block all blacks on grindr} bugchasing {catch g.r.i.d.s.} grindr {ingest pozcum} {make catty comments on faceboook} {spend hour deciding what t-shirt to wear} {use sublime text}} nza {{crash noisebridge event} {deface public property}} shaniqua {{baby daddy paternity test} {ignore incog}} cheesypeas {{10 ?"NIGGER ";:GOTO 10} NS-Gruess {auto shop} {chicken 65} {forget to insert cac} {gpib control programming} {idapro + logic analyzer} {old man problems} {restore ww2 era radio set} {treat intestinal worms caught from handling possums and feral cats} welding {work on jew zapper} {chicken 65}} rory {{get indicted under the cfaa}} butte {{ask winkie to fix bot} {be a chatbully} {be a techbro} {be bitter} {browse lolqdb} {call [nick] a liar} {cause drama via pms} {cause gentrification} {con everyone to click on a disgusting image} {connect with ssl} {customize bespoke artisanal timestamp} {fail with tcl} {gape chat} {get arrested for hacking, but walk free because you're teenager} {get doxxed} {get manipulated by colin} {hang out in same irc room with people that own multi-billion dollar startups} {irc from toilet} {ironic racism} {mock avi} {personal drama meltdown} {post a fake story} {pour 40 for moira_} {stalk succesful ex-buttensians working at google and facebook} {succesfully sell startup equity} {take company bus to work} {talk about functional programming} {try to memorize the name of an age old proc} {unironic racism} {use 9gag memes to sound like you still were cool and hip} {use pm to oper as your personal rape alarm} {work in it} {work on tcl procs}} dja {{chat through byzantine gateway} {fail to see beatiful scrolls}}}
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