diff --git a/vars/65f4db31e0536a2e56b7d1f8b1fc252dda9b13bc b/vars/65f4db31e0536a2e56b7d1f8b1fc252dda9b13bc new file mode 100644 index 0000000..82b1ada --- /dev/null +++ b/vars/65f4db31e0536a2e56b7d1f8b1fc252dda9b13bc @@ -0,0 +1,7137 @@ +scalar {{What an evasive answer. I want to know if you have been the parent of a +child who has been terminally or chronically ill. That is a yes or no +answer. What is subjective about that? Do you have kids or not? Did you +have sick siblings as a child or not? If you answer with "I've pretty much +been...." then you are a coward and a pretentious idiot-fuck. Answer the +fucking question. I find your answer pretty condescending to the Robbins's +situation, and it really struck me raw. If you can't empathize, you can't. +Just say that it sounds terrible. Don't say that you have "a pretty good +idea" and that it is "subjective." Would you tell J. that you know how it +is? + +You didn't reflect at all with sympathy; you directed the attention back to +yourself. I'm just curious if you are pathological or if you have a story. +% +That's why when I was wrestling half my training regimen was spent +strengthening my sphincter muscles. One of the better excercises was +sticking a roll of quarters up my ass, then I would slowly and deliberately +push it back out. I got so good at this the guys would hand me a dollar +after practice, asking for change for the soda machine. The first time this +was meant to be a joke but when my muscles became so refined that I could +give the change to them one quarter at a time, the joke was on them. + +The end result was that I became strong enough to lock-in my opponents +finger(s) when he tried to check my oil, thereby incapacitating half of his +mobility and strength. I can't tell you how many reversal points I scored +off this, but it was worth at least two every match. +% +I was at the mall today buying some yugioh cards (tryin' to complete my CDIP +set) & this kid standing next to me in line at the game shop says "Man, that +yugiHO s**t is homo, you shouldn't be wasting your faggot cash on some lame +fucking s**t crap like that. Fuckin' cocksucker." I turned around, saw no +one, then peered down at a child who looked about 10 years old holding many +packs of Pokemon Unseen Forces. + +I then got into a debate (for what seemed like 30 minutes or so) on the +superiority of Yugioh to poke'mon. And at the end he just called me a "fag" +and proceeded to punch my in the stomach. I finally crawled on my bruised +stomach to a nearby mall cop, and pointed to that snot nosed brat, last I +saw of him he was on the mall cops shoulder cying for his mother. Ha...kids.. +% +i'm sick and tired of people thinking being ugly is just "how god made +you"!!! Here's two prime examples of how this statement is false, please +feel free to add yer own. :P + +How one gets fat: + + eating WAY too fucking much + +[or] + + they are genetically HUGE [lol only in very few cases] + +>>Conclusion: lol, fat=no self control to stop fucking eating; no self +control=not very attractive; fat=not pretty. + +How one gets acne: + + oily icky gross dirty skin that isn't washed and has dead skin +clogging pores + +[or] + + genetically gross [lol, in some cases, yet they can be 'fixed' so +it's still no excuse] + +>>>Conclusion: lol, wash yur fucking face! acne=no self responsibity to wash +yur fucking face!; no responsibility=lol not very attractive; acne=not pretty +THUS, /end rant, but yes, people who don't have the self control to be at a +reasonable weight are icky icky gross, and dirty people ho don't wash, lol +ew, yea, gross. +% +Anime isn't just a bunch of cheap American ripoffs of cartoons, it's art. +Next time you American sheeple are watching your simpsons or south park or +whatever mindless American cartoons that have plots, storylines and comedy, +I'll be Admiring the wonderful and superior art of Chinese cartoons. +% +oh and to people who are worried about games looking childish its usually a +good indication that your a just a kid who thinks he's grown up cause he can +shoot hookers in GTA +% +There is very little of value in blogging. There are some real journalists +who have an online newsletter, and real writers who post articles +independently -- that they happen to be classified as blogs flatters the +sycophantic self-indulgent blogosphere at large. Imagine if you serialized +your blog and emailed all your friends with it every time you updated it? +If they wouldn't welcome such a diary, don't bother with your blog. The +people who care are the people no one cares about. +% +The problem is all bloggers have a following -- other bloggers. Should we +allow every member of NAMBLA his own page on Wikipedia because he has a few +dozen acquaintances at NAMBLA? No. Nearly all bloggers who are nothing but +should be eliminated from Wikipedia. Published journalists and legitimate +authors who happened to be classified as "bloggers" are welcome, of course. +% +I'm not trying to brag or anything, but yeah, I smoke weed. I don't give a +damn what anyone says regarding marijuana laws. Go ahead, trace my ip. Tell +the cops where I live, I should be able to put whatever i want in my body, +may it be marijuana, a 10 year olds childs semi erect penis, or cocaine. The +government doesn't have any right telling us what is "ok" to consume. +% +I asked my friend for a sip of his pepsi and he gave me the can. Afterward +he accused me of 'nigger lipping' his pepsi and refused to take it back. In +a rage, I filed a hate crime report with the NYPD and had his racist ass +hauled off to juvee where I'm sure disgusting faggots are anally violating +him even as I type these words. I abhor bigots. +% +Oh great another holiday for christians to force their believes on me. +Christmas is just another day for us atheists, i'll be listening to atheist +radio and maybe watch a little tv. I'll let the brainwashed Christians have +"cheer and good fun". +% +Once, when i was changing my little brother's diaper, i jacked him off. I +don't know what drove me to do it, but I did. now i can't stop thinking +about his little penis. I think i want him to grow up and fuck me. +% +How could Sony betray me like this?!? I waited in line for three +months--yes, I started the very first line for the PS3 way before anyone +else. I endured the elements, the snide comments, and unemployment (I was +fired from my job after the first week) because I wanted to be the very +first person to play what I imagined would be the salvation to all my +dearest dreams. Rumor had it that playing a videogame on the PS3 would be +like injecting heroin directly into your eyeball. I believed the hype and +worshipped Sony as my god. + +Finally, with nearly every credit card maxed out and two debt consolidation +plans under my belt, the great day arrived and I fought my way into the +store to get my hands on this wonder console. Leaving the store I did a +little victory dance and then drove up and down the parking lot taunting +those who did not get a PS3. Then it was off to home to play this little +beauty. + +I hooked everything up while my wife and children watched and applauded at +my direction. It was time to play the first game! After two hours I noticed +that waves of heat were pouring off the console, so I told my daughter to +hold it up in the air in front of a fan while I continued playing, waiting +for the opiate-like ecstasy that was soon to overwhelm me after I shot to +death another video game enemy. Things went fine for awhile; an hour later +the box began whistling and my daughter complained that it was getting too +hot to hold. I figured this was just what they called "burning in" and +continued playing. + +Then, at the four hour mark, my daughter began complaining of blisters and +within fifteen minutes the entire console burst into flames, the plastic +casing scorching and bubbling as I rushed to complete the level. But I was +too late, and my precious daughter burned to death. Wracked with sadness at +not being able to save my game, I immediately called my lawyer to review my +options for a massive lawsuit. + +I am sure we all expected a few "bugs" and "glitches" and "inconveniences", +but that does not excuse Sony for selling what appears to be a blazing DEATH +TRAP. + +Caveat emptor! +% +Nigger? So you think you are superior not only because you're white! it's +because you read! ha! I didn't know they were people like you in this +website, and I hope you learn more about our people, because I'm very +ofended now. Racism is illegal, you know? if they were enough technologies +to know who is behind that "anonymus", no doubt you would be behind bars +now! Please respect others, even if they don't like reading like you do. +% +I m a hindu religious girl. I don't when i got the habit of masturbation.Now +i feeling guilty.? +I have always wear panty while doing it. use pillow to masturbate.I think +some white discharge is there when i do this.doesn't know whether pillow +became wet or not. I have left this habit when i came to know that it is not +good. my problem is now i think if anybody touches those pillow he or she +will become impure. similar is the with the things whom i used to touch that +time.what to do.I m getting mad. how to solve this issue.I promise not to +masturbate again. I cannot wash them all.Plz HELP AS SOON AS POSSIBLE. mAY +gOD BLESS U ALL +% +a rabbi told me the other day the deffinitive prove to demon's existance. +you have to get a black female cat (daughter of a black cat), kill it and +burn it. put your bed in the middle of your room so that it's not touching +any walls, and then spread the ash in a circle surrounding it. sleep there. +the next day if you're still alive you will see the marks of demon's feet: +they'll look like hen claws. and that's it, I really talked to a rabbi +asking him to prove his wonderful religion and this is the best he could +come with (it is written on the guemara wich is like the torah i think). +% +You can spot a Nintendo 64 game from a mile away. If the textures look like +they were photographed with a cell phone camera, copied to VHS tape, copied +to another VHS tape, imported into the computer and saved as a low quality +JPEG, and then the computer was chucked into a fire, you know you're playing +a Nintendo 64 game. +% +I am sick to death of the ludicrous anti-Nintendo ravings of you pissed-off +geeks. Do you really believe the rest of us don't see right through your +mental pathology? Your entire conosole philosophy boils down to this: "The +cool kids picked on me in high school, and I can't get over it. I hate the +Wii" +% +girl you must be the aeon flux movie because i never wanna see you again +% +IM SO SICK AND TIRED OF CHRISTIANS PUSHING THEIR BELIEFS ON ME, i mean every +year i go to buy something at the store and I see HAPPY HOLLIDAYS and it +pisses me off so muchhh i mean christians are everywhere i mean its like +UHHGGGGG but anyway this year its gonna be different. i just got down +purchasing my ANTI-god pin. im going to every place where they sell +christmas trees and all the "happy" (yeah more like BRAINWASHED) familys +will see my anti-god pin and i will silently protest this stupid holliday +yeah go atheists! +% +Tokyo is a great country. I have been there. Its provinces (shinagawa, +shinjuku, roppongi) are incredibly vast and there is an inter-provincial +high speed train that links them all! The best part is that the train also +allows you to travel to neighboring countries, for example if you wanted to +visit the country of Osaka you could do so because they use the same +currency. Amazing, isn't it? I wish Canada would use the same dollars that +the US does. +% +Now disguised fully as some sort of shabbily dressed derelict, I quickly +made off with my shopping cart and ran full tilt back to the park. With no +hesitation I dug through the trash barrel I'd found earlier, seizing every +last can and bottle from the fetid depths of the garbage. I was almost +deterred when my hand plunged into a soiled diaper, obviously unimproved +from the three days of rain we'd received prior, but I had my eyes on the +prize. I rolled my cart down the paths of the park, past the lemmings of our +society as they strolled idly past jackpot after jackpot, lacking sense and +ambition enough to loot them for their own benefit. Many of them could not +contain their envy, looking at me with disgusted jealousy as I filled my +cart with money. One phenomenon I cannot explain: a Catholic nun handed me a +one dollar bill and told me I could get a free meal at St. Joseph's parish +every Sunday afternoon. I took the cash, obviously, and thanked her for the +tip on the new scam. I figure they must make you sign up for some shit +before you get the free food, and that the nun must get a kickback for every +new signup. Slick setup, but I'll just keep the buck, Sister Sucker! + +When I thought I'd plucked the final gem from this treasure chest, I slowly +paced my way towards the most convenient road out of the park. I passed by a +man drinking from a brown paper bag. I wasn't born yesterday, so I knew that +he had a bottle in it (and probably not Chocolate Yoohoo if you get my +drift). I tried to look very patient and unassuming while I waited for him +to finish his bottle and discard it, so that I might add it to my coffers. +After ten or so minutes he did something shocking and unexpected: he walked +into a nearby Port-A-Potty and took the bottle in with him. Seven minutes +later, exactly, he re-emerged without his bottle. The disgusting truth was +obvious, he had finished his bottle while on the latrine and tossed the +empty down into the hole. I nearly wrote that one off as a loss, but then my +inner puppet spoke once again, chiding me for the sheer Hagginsian nature of +my hesistation. Suffice to say, I was shoulder deep in shit before I even +had time to regret my moment of weakness. Was the resulting bottle of Olde +English 800 Malt Liquor worth the effort? You bet your ass, buddy. + +Alright, so even the faithful are probably getting impatient by now. I'm +sure you want to know what my take was after all that time and effort and +both occassions of having a limb thrust into fecal matter. Let's just say +that Andrew Jackson and I have a dinner date tonight (though I'll only be +needing his vagrant friend Alexander Hamilton once I apply my coupon). On +second thought, Kroger's has On-Cor Salisbury Steaks for 2.50, and I have a +manufacturer's coupon which I attained by lying to their customer care line. +In case you're wondering, saying you found a condom in your chicken parmesan +is only worth a dollar off your next purchase. +% +girl you must be a playground slide because i want to go down on you +repeatedly +% +Honestly, I'd like to hear some commentary from someone who hasn't been +caught trying to suck their own dick. +% +YEAH RIGHT SO I STRAIGHT STABBED SOME PROSTITUTE WITH A FORK. IT AINT NOTHIN +THOUGH NAWMEAN. BITCH ASS JUDGE HIT ME WITH 3 YEARS OF PROBATION AND 80 +HOURS OF COMMUNITY SERVICE. 80 HOURS? NIGGA I BENCHPRESS 80 HOURS. NIGGAS +THINK I AINT GONNA WILD OUT AND FORK SOMEONE ELSE CUZ I'M ON PAROLE SO I'M +JUST LAUGHIN YO. I LAUGH AT THESE ACTORS. FUCKIN P.O THINKING I AINT GON +COME IN HIGH AS SHIT OFF THE TREES JUST BECAUSE I GOT PEE IN A CUP. I DO +THAT AND THROW IT IN A NIGGA'S FACE. PUNK LOOKIN OFFENDED AND SHIT I'M JUST +LIKE DAMN SON, YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO BE COVERED IN MY URINE. FAGGOT +DON'T KNOW WHERE MY DICK'S BEEN. IT AINT NOTHIN TO A G LIKE ME NAWMEAN +% +In the 1960s, a student at Harvard Law School addressed the parents and +alumni with these words: + +The streets of our country are in turmoil. The universities are filled with +students rebelling and rioting. Communists are seeking to destroy our +country. Russia is threatening us with her might. And the republic is in +danger. Yes! danger from within and without. We need law and order! Without +law and order our nation cannot survive. + +There was prolonged applause. When the applause died down, the student +quietly told his listeners: "These word were spoken in 1932 by Adolf Hitler." +% +Hmm, are you implying that people with long hair are gay? That's pretty +hilarious if so, seeing as how most gay people have basic short hair. +% +I am a BIG FAT GAY VAMPIRE in the BOSTON AREA. What I am looking for is +other QUEER VAMPIRES to be GAY with and to DRINK BLOOD out of foofy martini +glasses and maybe to use it as ingredients in a cosmopolitan. OR MAYBE ONE +OF THOSE DRINKS WITH ALL THE UMBRELLAS AND THINGS. Then we will go DISCO +DANCING to HOT DISCO TRACKS and talk about how TOTALLY AWESOME Madonna is. I +guess after doing that we will have to get a PLATE OF NACHOS or something +EQUALLY FATTENING and then stuff them into our BIG FAT GAY FACES. The nachos +should have SOUR CREAM on them because that is the best way to eat them. I +am looking for someone who will let me DRINK THEIR QUEER BLOOD. In addition +to being QUEER you must also be FAT, this is very important. Ideally I would +also get fatter from drinking your STUPID CHUBBY GAY BLOOD. You can drink +mine too but only if I get to wear your GAY UNDERWEAR on my head while you +do. +% +hey gurl what kind of sex locations you into? im all about the dorm +room/hotel room/dark corner/men's bathroom/janitor's closet/parent's +bedroom/kindergarten classroom/bus shelter/deserted corner of the park/arby's +% +While many parents are digging deep and forgoing luxuries in order to buy +their children the newest videogame console, I've decided to build my own +interactive entertainment device for my children. It's a desk with a copy of +the holy bible on it. I call it the "Praystation 3" +% +girl you must be a rodeo bull because i want to ride you for 8 seconds and +then get off +% +Keep at it! I'm sure someday you'll be mentioned in a blog. +% +girl, you must be rearden metal because i'd like to run a train on you. +% +windows genuine advantage, created so geeks have a genuine advantage when it +comes to getting in a womans pants. Masterminded by Bill Gates who wanted +to give something back to the community. He devised a plot which would +force women to speak to lowly geeks world wide +% +shut the fuk up bitch u get a lyf dumass ur a fkn hipacrit u sed to keep +shyt to urself well u didnt do that n ur lyk aw get over it well u fkn get +over it 2 then dont go fkn ritin shyt lyk u sed fkn looza +% +I admit, I love the natural smells of a man. Nothing turns me on more. A +healthy funk in a mans armpit or a working-mans sweaty balls are like +nothing else to me. They are easily more effective than poppers, legal and +dont give me a headache. Speaking of armpits, I dont like deodorant either, +mostly because it tastes so terrible. +% +When I was in 7th grade my Social Studies teacher asked me what my favorite +system of government was. Luckily I was wearing my Anti-Flag tee that day. I +cracked my knuckles and reclined in my desk and replied cooly, "Anarchy." +% +Linux Is your wife, I swear. I stride nude in your computer room ; yet you +dont care. Transfixed with penguins on the screen. This Open Source makes me +scream. Im tossing your computer in the trash. RMS is whose genitals you +tongue lash. Enemy of Our Freedom you say? I dont care. You're just gay. +% +Yes I too fell victim to internet cruelty. Only in my case it was IRC abuse. +To make a long story short I was willing to do anything to get +V and some +'people' took advantage of that. +% +Roll Playing (RP) turns into real life tragedies and Real people get hurt or +die. If you want to RP why not try to Roll Play real life situations such as +how to pay the electric bill, house payment, and car payment, insurance and +so on. Roll Play your parents working hard to give you a better education +and life. +% +Yesterday after coming home from an extremely long, stressful day of work, I +plopped down on the couch to relax for a bit. Laying in front of the TV is +great, but an orgasm would really help me blow off some steam. Lucky for me, +I had recently purchased a rabbit, so I retrieved that from my bedroom, +returned to the couch, and brought up some gay porn on my laptop(side rant-- +will someone please make porn tailored to women?) Just as I was beginning to +get that tingling feeling that happens before I come, I heard the sound of +someone trying to unlock the door to my apartment. WHATTHEFUCKISTHIS!? Shit! +I am naked from the waist down holding a loud-ass vibrator standing in front +of a laptop on which a man is moaning loudly and telling another man how he +wants him to "put it in my ass!" SHIT! WHO THE FUCK IS COMING IN THE DOOR +RIGHT NOW? + +I completely panic. My shaking hands try desperately to turn the vibrator +off, but in my excited state I completely forget how to do it..there are so +many buttons!! why did I buy the fancy model??? I rip the batteries out of +the stupid thing after fumbling with it and wasting precious seconds. I +throw everything in the closet of my bedroom, close the door, and start to +look for some pants. Then I remember that gay porn is still being played +loudly on my couch. FUCK! FUCK! FUCK! I could hear the sound of the second +lock unlocking. I dash back into the livingroom and try with my again +shaking hands to at least turn the volume down. The door is opening at this +point so I snatch the laptop and scurry half-nakedly back to my bedroom +while depressing the volume button. Unfortuately, I hit the wrong side of +the volume button and deafeningly loud moans are now emanating from my +bedroom--gay men moans. Shit! People are in my living room now. I yell "ONE +MOMENT!!!!" as loud as I can, trying to try to drown the sounds of Brad +getting slammed in the ass. In a complete state of terror I make the unwise +decision of throwing the laptop as far under my bed as I can, hoping that +the boxspring and mattress would be enough to muffle the sound of my laptop +at full volume. Sadly, it was not. People are milling about in the apartment +now, so I grab some shorts from my bureau and emerge from my bedroom to +greet the realtor and prospective new tenants in a dress shirt and shorts, +flushed, and visibly shaken. I introduce myself over the sounds of an +apparent orgy in my bedroom to a profusely apologizing realtor and a +smirking couple. I summoned as much dignity as I could, smiled devilishly, +and returned to the fake orgy in my bedroom as they showed themselves out. +% +I like to put excessively large ammounts of Vaseline on my cock and fuck +empty toilet paper rolls. I think my parents are starting to notice that +we're running out of Vaseline every 4 days or so. +% +One time I was performing anal sex on my best friends dog like I always did +on the weekends, but this most recent time I must of thrusted too hard and I +think I damaged the internals of the labrador. It then got a horrible hernia +and soon died after my friend was attempting to coax it back to life. It +felt great. +% +i just took a shit and my toilet didn't really flush, i got pretty +frustrated and now im going to masturbate to internet porn galleries. Good +day to you. +% +I bought this book to teach my child about her body, and I was excited about +the opportunity to bond with her in this fashion. However, little did I know +about all of the pictures of nude women in this book. The almost 'erotic' +quality of these photos were not for children! Then when we got to the parts +that involved naked men, I shut the book. She didn't need to see those +pictures. Later, when she was asleep - I looked at the book alone and found +unbelievable pictures of naked men and women performing the strangest acts +on each other with pieces of fruit and a vacuum cleaner! What is my child +going to learn from this? How to be a Kuma Sutra expert? No, thanks. She +gets plenty of that from her father. +% +you walk in( the door will be open for you) you come to my bedrom where porn +will be playing.......you begin to suck this big black dick...no damn small +talk...just walk in and start sucking........i cum on your face and then you +can leave or then when can have small talk.....be ready.....i dont want a +lot of emails back and forth..just let me know if your ready for a +address..... +% +gurl what design patterns u into? i'm into: bridge / command / interpreter +/ prototype / flyweight / strategy / builder / abstract factory / proxy / +facade / composite / chain of responsibility / decorator / adapter / factory +method / observer / memento / template method / visitor / iterator / +mediator / state / singleton +% +i keep baking fucking cakes. this pink wig tart keeps me up nights and +since i can't jack off any more since the operation i just keep fucking +making cakes. everyone at the office thinks that i'm some sort of faggot +becuase i bring in cakes every day. they're all fat forty-five year old +tits-sagging-to-the-floor soccer moms and if they knew that cake-baking was +my masturbatory substitute they probably wouldn't even eat them. probably +also if they knew i pissed in the cake mix. +% +did you guys hear on the news? usually i don't watch the news, i just heard +my friend's brother freaking out about it. it's on right now. North Korea +shot a three missiles at Japan, but MISSED!! XD what would happen if they +didn't miss?? one of them was aimed for America, too. It's on Fox News right +now. THey're talking about shooting back at Korea. STUPID KOREA! dude, +manhwa vs manga. XD awesome. +what if they actually didn't miss?? what would happen to everyone's favorite +mangas and animes. i pray to God this isn't the end of humanity. Wait, i +don't care if humanity ends. Humanity sucks. I just don't want JAPAN TO END! +or the world. i haven't even had a chance to glomp Inuyasha. I DON'T HAVE +PROBLEMS!!!! :ninja: +% +The first step is to heat 3 or 4 hot dogs to body temperature. Don't make +them too hot or it won't work -- about 30 seconds will do. When they're +done, stick all the hot dogs into a condom. Lube your penis and slide it +into the middle of the hot dogs, so they're surrounding your penis. Then +pump the entire package. And don't worry, the condom won't break. +% +Hey /b/, I have a very serious problem. I'm fucking crying because of how +stupid I am. + +Okay, so my girlfriend was supposed to come over to my house today because I +was going to go take her to a movie. She lives about 20 minutes away, and +the movie we were supposed to see started at 4:15, which was in about 40 +minutes. I figured "cool, I'll just play Pokemon while I wait". + +So I'm playing Pokemon, and having a pretty damn good time. Anyway, she +finally does show up, except she's crying as she walks into my room. Instead +of doing the right thing by comforting her, I half-focus on my game and her. +She starts telling me her cat died, and just as she was getting into it, I +get into a random encounter in my game. + +A shiny pidgey. Holy shit. (For those of you who don't know/care, shiny +pokemon have less than a 1/1000 chance of appearing). I stare into my screen +in amazement, yelling "holy shit, YES", interrupting her mid-story. She sobs +more, and she starts to yell "You don't even fucking care! YOU JUST WANT TO +PLAY YOUR FUCKING GAME!" I'm still looking at my screen, still focusing on +catching my shiny pidgey, when she walks over, and tosses the game against +the wall. I run over and pick up my DS hoping that nothing has changed on +screen, and quickly noticed that she broke it. My system and my shiny +pidgey, gone forever. + +I start screaming every obsenity I know, and started flailing my arms +around. I didn't know she was behind me, and appearantly I backhanded her in +the face while I was being a dumbass and swinging my fists around. She yells +out "FUCK YOU", and runs out of my house in tears. + +What have I done? I've fucked up so badly, and I need to know how to +approach her. I don't want a game of Pokemon to be respoinsible for ruining +my best relationship ever. Help me /b/. +% +Over the years, the bathrooms at the Church have fallen into ill repair and +we decided to completely replace them with more conveniently located +bathrooms across the Church. To make a use for our old bathrooms, I've +decided to convert them into novel "Glory holes", where children may +celebrate the Glory of God by speaking to a priest or other spiritual +advisor through a hole in the wall. +% +Well, it finally happened. Women got as horny as us. All it took was five +years of dry humping in high school, one or two boyfriends in college, a +failed career, three giant kids, and a divorce. Now they?re so horny they?re +willing to pay for it. Nice timing, God. +% +FUBU BIG CHAINZ DUBZ $BLING$ $BLING$ FUCK DA 5-0 BITCHES BLUNTS 40Z KICIKIN +IT BLUNTED JARNELL BABY MAMMA CHILD SUPPORT CHICKEN AN WATERMELON KOOL AID +DA RED KIND FOOD STAMPS WESTSIDE $$CASH MONIES$$ DRIVE BY RYDE OR DIE NIGGA +RUFF RYDA 4 LYFE PHAT ICE PHAT BLUNT DENZEL WASHINGTON ROCAWEAR ICE BLING +BLING 5-0 187 MURDA MURDA FOOD STAMPS BLUNTS PAPERZ BLAZED WELFARE CHITLINS +GRITS KOOL AID HOLLA BACK FUCK DA POLICE ROLLIN IN DA BENZ-O +% +Sometims when I feel an unusually large bowel movement coming soon, I'll +weigh myself before and after to determine the magnitude of the feces I'm +shedding +% +I like fucking pregnant women. If they�re having a boy it ain�t fun, but if +they have a girl then it�s two pussies for the price of one. +% +I have put you on a permanent ignore, public and private. I have found you +disturbing, rude and generally not worth talking to. According to the +channels you hang on, it strengtens the effect of wanting to put you on +ignore because of my lack of interest in you as a person. This message is +not meant to be rude to you, just to inform you that i won't see anything of +what you type from now on. +% +one time i found a bum passed out. i thought it would be one hell of a gag +to take him and put him in my roomates bed with him so i did. he woke up to +the shock of a naked bum and couldnt stand the thought of what might have +happend that night. he then killed himself before i could enjoy my little +practical joke +% +She's so fucking cute and sweet. I'd treat her to some fancy restaurant, +then take a long romantic walk with her, holding hands and talking about +philosophy, art and dreams. Then I'd invite her to my home and ravage her +hot ass for hours, and forcing my cock down her throat so she choked on both +the throbbing cock and her own rectal juice. I'd then proceed to cum on her +cute innocent face. Then, as the ultimate love gift, I'd carry her in my +arms to the tub and let my piss wash away the semen and last dignity from +her. I'd whisper "I love you" and give her a tender smile, and cut her +throat from ear to ear with a knife. Covered in her own warm blood, she'd +look straight into my very soul, forgiving, understanding. A bubble from +blood and saliva would burst between her lips, then she'd die. After some +additional lovemaking, I'd stuff her in a bin bag. Three Weeks later, some +playing children will find her mutilated and desecrated body in the forest. +They will be scarred for life. +% +I thought gmail was, like, gangsta mail. I signed up expecting to get g'd up +with bitches, gangstas and guns but it's just an email service. +% +hey girl, what kind of religions you into, i\;m all about Judaism, +Contemporary divisions, Rabbinic Judaism, Orthodox Judaism, Modern Orthodox +Judaism, Haredi Judaism, Hassidic Judaism, Conservative Judaism (Masorti), +Reform Judaism, Reconstructionist Judaism, Humanistic Judaism, Karaite +Judaism, Historical groups, Hasmoneans, Essenes, Pharisees, Sadducees, +Zealots, Sicarii, Ebionites, Elkasites, Nazarenes, Crypto-Jews, Marranos, +Conversos, Christianity, Eastern Orthodoxy, Roman Catholicism, Oriental +Orthodoxy, Monophysitism, Nestorianism, Arianists, Arian Catholicism, +Unitarians, Protestantism, High Protestantism, Lutherans, Anglicans, +Calvinist sects, Reformed, Presbyterian, Low Protestantism, Methodists, +Baptists, Radical Low Protestantism, Anabaptists, Mennonites, Amish, +Religious Society of Friends, Evangelicalism, Pentecostals, Apostolic +Churches, Unitarians, Waldensians, Latter-day Saints, Church of Jesus Christ +of Latter-day Saints, Community of Christ, Fundamentalist Church of Jesus +Christ of Latter Day Saints, Seventh-day Adventist, Jehovah's Witnesses, +Mama Tata, Messianic Judaism, Islam, Kharijites, Shiite, Alawites, Ismailis, +Jafari, Zaiddiyah, Ghulat including, Alevi / Bektashi, Ahl-e Haqq, Yazidi, +Druze, Ahmadi, Sunni, Berailvi, Deobandi, Hanafi, Hanbali, Maliki, +Mu'tazili, Shafi'i, Wahhabi, Sufism, Naqshbandi, Bektashi, Chishti, Mevlevi, +Tijani, Zikri, Mandaeanists, Hinduism, Agama Hindu Dharma, Shaivism, +Shaktism, Smartism, Vaishnavism, Lingayatism, Gaudiya Vaishnavism, ISKCON +(Hare Krishna), Sri Krishna Chaitanya Mission, Samkhya, Nyaya, Vaisheshika, +Purva mimamsa, Vedanta (Uttar Mimamsa), Dvaita Vedanta, Advaita Vedanta, +Integral Yoga, Yoga, Ashtanga Yoga, Hatha yoga, Siddha Yoga, Tantric Yoga, +Ayyavazhi, Shramana Religions, Buddhism, Mahayana, Nikaya schools, +Theravada, Vajrayana, Jainism, Digambara, Shvetambara, Panth Religions, +Sikhism, Nirankari, Kabir Panth, Dadu Panth, Zoroastrianism, Magus, +Gnosticism, Basilidians, Bogomils, Borborites, Cainites, Carpocratians, +Cathars, Marcionism, Ophites, Valentinians, Hermeticism, Vaishnavism, +African religions, Akamba mythology, Akan mythology, Ashanti mythology, +Bushongo mythology, Bwiti, Dahomey mythology, Dinka mythology, Efik +mythology, Egyptian mythology, Ibo mythology, Isoko mythology, Khoikhoi +mythology, Lotuko mythology, Lugbara mythology, Pygmy mythology, Tumbuka +mythology, Yoruba mythology, Zulu mythology, African diaspora religions, +Kumina, Obeah, Santería (Lukumi), Vodou, Candomblé, Macumba, Umbanda and +Quimbanda, Xango, Anglo-Saxon mythology, Basque mythology, Druidry (Celtic +Religion), Finnish mythology, Germanic paganism, Norse mythology, Greek +religion, Greek mythology, Mystery religions, Eleusinian Mysteries, +Mithraism, Pythagoreanism, Roman religion, Roman mythology, Slavic +mythology, Babylonian mythology, Chaldean mythology, Sumerian mythology, +Chinese mythology, Shinto, Oomoto, Tengriism, Yezidis, Abenaki mythology, +Aztec mythology, Blackfoot mythology, Chippewa mythology, Creek mythology, +Crow mythology, Guarani mythology, Haida mythology, Ho-Chunk mythology, +Huron mythology, Inuit mythology, Iroquois mythology, Kwakiutl mythology, +Lakota mythology, Lenape mythology, Navaho mythology, Nootka mythology, +Pawnee mythology, Salish mythology, Selk'nam religion, Seneca mythology, +Tsimshian mythology, Ute mythology, Zuni mythology, Australian Aboriginal +mythology, Balinese mythology, Maori mythology, Modekngei (Republic of +Palau), Nauruan indigenous religion, Polynesian mythology, Church of All +Worlds, Dievturiba, Germanic neopaganism, Heathenry, Odinism, Theodism, +Wotanism, Judeo-Paganism, Maausk, Neo-druidism, Summum, Taarausk, Wicca, +Alexandrian Wicca, Dianic Wicca (Feminist Wicca), Gardnerian Wicca, Faery +Wicca, Feri Tradition, Carvaka, Confucianism, Deism, Ethical Culture, +Fellowship of Reason, Spiritual Humanism, Mohism, Taoism, Dragon Rouge, +Satanism, LaVeyan Satanism, Church of Satan, Order of Nine Angles, +Setianism, Temple of Set, The Storm, Quimbanda, Luciferianism, Syncretic +religions, Cao Dai, Falun Dafa, Huna, Konkokyo, Manichaeism, Unitarian +Universalism, Universal Life Church, Tenrikyo, Theosophy, Seicho-No-Ie, +Burkhanism, Cargo cults, Ghost Dance, Native American Church, Rastafari +movement, Umbanda, Candomble, Pastafarianism, Church of Emacs, Polytheism, +Mysticism, Atheism, you know +% +The relationship between gamer and game is much unlike the relationship +between needle and record-groove (that is to say, the needle loves the +record groove and vice-versa, so says Tamio Okuda); the game has to love the +player even when the player hates the game. +% +im from louisiana.drank killed my boyfriend sippin isnt for everyone so be +careful +% +LAWL I ONCE HEARD AN AOL COMMERCIAL THAT SAID "AOL IS GOOD" AND I LAUGHED MY +ASS OFF AND I LITERALLY PISSED AND SHAT MY PANTS SIMULTANEOUSLY AND THEN I +THREW UP IN MY MOUTH A LITTLE AND IT WAS THE FUNNIEST THING I HAVE EVER +HEARD OH MY GOD THAT WAS FUNNY +% +one time i invited two of my friends (well, my only two friends) over for +dinner at my apartment. i was in a bad mood that day and while they were in +the living room playing sword quest 4, i masturbated into the milk in the +measuring cup before making the mashed potatoes. all three of us enjoyed the +meal, myself doubly so... in part because i secretly knew my friends now +have my seed in them, and also in part because i ate the mashed potatoes too +and the thought of consuming my own seed makes me want to masturbate into +more food. i fear i am in a vicious cycle at this point. someone help me? +please? +% +DEAR ABBY: I recently met a gorgeous woman I'll call "Giselle." After we had +dated for a couple of months and became physically involved, she told me she +had had gender reassignment surgery and used to be a man! I was, to say the +least, shocked and deeply disturbed. I did not punch out Giselle as I would +have liked to -- which brings me to my question. What is the etiquette +regarding physically confronting someone like that? Is it the same as +hitting a girl? We're roughly the same size. -- DISTRESSED IN VIRGINIA +% +I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who +rises and sleeps under the blanket of the very freedom I provide, then +questions the manner in which I provide it. +% +Women make up 51 percent of the population, and because of this, Linux +should be banned in government. Operating Systems like Linux discriminate +against women because of a built in difficulty compared with Windows and +Apple's OS X. + +Women pay taxes, and therefore shouldn't be discriminated against in getting +employment with government agencies. If these agencies had used Windows or +OS X, more women would be able to persue dreams of a full time job in +government. Linux is by its nature a man's domain. Women are designed to use +social interaction and emotions to deal with complex tasks, things the +command line are ill suited. + +OS X, and Windows have friendly and female-intuitive designs that take into +account a woman's understanding of objects, ie. folders, desktops, Clippy, +the XP search dog. These help women operate the computer by giving her a +relationship with these icons, and helpful animated pets. It makes a woman +feel at home with her computer by allowing her to relate to it. + +Linux, on the other hand is designed for command line and programming. Sure, +it may have a fugly GUI to hide its true being, but to get any serious work +done you must know a bunch of arcane commands with hundreds of options that +change with every command. Something like this: chmod a+rwx. Only engineers +can understand this. And most engineers are still men. This puts the female +population at a great disadvantage when applying for work. Men know this, +and that's why they deliberately try to install linux in the workplace. + +How would women's groups react when they read the studies that are being +commissioned by industry on this very subject? Surely, women, when they +learn of this, will outvote men and ban linux from the government. +% +I work for a shipping company that deals specifically with the delivery of +animals, mostly lab animals but we get some zoo business. Occasionaly some +of these animals die during shipping, and we do some paperwork and have them +creamated and no one ever misses them. Once I stole a monkey and marked it +as dead and burned on the paperwork. I took it because it was a very large +monkey and I thought it might make a cool pet. After I got tired of taking +care of a huge monkey I shaved it and took it to a prostitute. I told her it +was my deformed younger brother and that I would pay her extra to take his +virginity. It cost me a lot of money but I got her to do it and let me +watch. She was trying to pretend she liked it but she looked sick and +Manny(the monkey) was confused at first but he really started to get into +it. The whole experience makes me sick when I think about it. The fact that +I watched and that I did that to that girl, I wonder if she beleived it was +really my brother or if she just needed more crack. But also when I think +about it I laugh so fucking hard. I shot the monkey and left it in the woods +afterword, I guess Manny died happy. +% +THERE IS NO JUSTIFICAITON FOR ATTACKING SOMEONE. NOT EVEN IF YOU'RE USING A +COMPUTER TO DO IT. BECAUSE YOU'RE STLL HUMAN, AND THE PERSON YOU'RE +ATTACKING IS STILL HUMAN, AND YOU BOTH STILL HAVE MINDS AND FEELINGS. +% +PS3 is shaping out to be a true status symbol for those who are very well +off. I earn a salary reaching 75k per year and that's without my annual +bonus. + +I'll be getting three PS3 systems (two for back up purposes). The games are +rumoured to be locked $89 and upwards for each copy. The software price is +expected to never go down over time ending the practice of consumers waiting +for prices to fall. Each system can not play used, rented, or borrowed games. + +Having said that, this is a dream come true. This is a true fan system for +hardcore gamers only. No longer will I have to suffer being in the company +of pretenders. Finally we'll have a system to be truly proud to say we own. +Just like the Neo Geo, except successful. + +For those poor people who cannot afford the ride, Microsoft and Nintendo +will accomodate your needs. + +For the rest of us that understand that you get what you pay for... I reckon +we're going to be in for a ride of our life. + +Count on it. +% +Yes, Firefox is for people who like one tab to use 75 MB of memory, since +some people like it when apps take advantage of memory installed in their +system instead of having 800 MB sitting there doing dick-all. +% +Look at that little string of text between my screenname and personal pic. +See that? That's living proof that I donated some of my own money to help +get these boards up. Because I love these boards. And you know what you just +did? You just wasted a handful of bandwith and database storage space to +post that uncannily awful waste of an attempt at an insult. In a sense, you +just wasted a fraction of my money. See that it +% +When my parents were tight on cash, I attempted to save money on our water +bill by pissing in the sink, and shitting on paper plates and dumping them +in the field behind our house. +% +My nephew used to work as a waiter in a seafood restaurant. And we all know +how niggers love "skrimps".....well, there was a huge nigger family one day +and they shared meals (typical) as well as ordering water as their drinks. +When they finally finished their meals, my nephew walked over to the huge +mess on the table. They stiffed him on the tip , and lo and behold EMPTY +KOOL-AID PACKETS !!!!! The niggers made their own Kool-Aid with the water +and sugar on the table. I couldn't believe my ears...but then +again............TNB +% +Well, $600 will buy you a fair amount of fish and will feed a bunch of +people once. However, you could also buy a PS3 and SimFishing then invite +all the starving over to have a competitive game and, in the process, teach +them how to fish which is infinitely more valuable. +% +HI! ANY 1 HERE WAN 2 CHAT??I AM 13/F/BRASIL KEKEKEJUZ LOOKIN FOR SUM1 2 TALK +2.NO OLD GUYSDATS GROSS!!!GOT 2 SEND PIX 2 GET PIXNO PRIVATESTHATS GROSS +TOO!PLZ /MSG ME 4 CHATim actually a 52 year old balding port-a-let cleaner +% +Eat shit, you greasy pacifist hippies. I am sick to death of the ludicrous +anti-American ravings of you pissed-off geeks. Do you really believe the +rest of us don't see right through your mental pathology? Your entire +political philosophy boils down to this: "The cool kids picked on me in high +school, and I can't get over it. I hate America" +% +Why cant the indians be like the blacks, coming to america in white-owned +ships to do our work because we're too lazy to do it. Those cheap ass +indians hoofed it across some hippy nature bridge +% +I see what you are trying to do and I advise you to stop at once. You may +think your Mr. Slick and that you have some kind of advantage over me in +this situation but you couldn't be further from the truth. Just because you +got a higher score on the SAT does not mean that you are intellectually +superior to me. I have 3 degrees in physics and biomedical engineering and I +just can�t believe that you try and pull something like this over on me. Now +stop acting like you�re the king shit and remove that cock from my ass +immediately. It�s my turn. +% +I like to give my self paper cuts on the head of my cock. Then have +ferocious sex to feel the burn. Think about your breathing +% +I get off on sticking my dick into house hold appliances. one day i put it +in a blender, i was really drunk. When i woke up in the hospital my forskin +was gone and they had to put in 50+ stiches. Needless to say, i enjoyed it +thoroughly. +% +Why is the idea of laying in the bathtub for an entire day, naked, pissing +and shitting and ejaculating, and being just filthy, seem so appealing? +% +Oh, Brad Pitt? I don't see what's so good about this old dude. He doesn't +have half the charm of what I got. Lol, I know for sure women are attracted +to him because of his material wealth. Look at all these hideous, butt-ugly +rich motha f*ckas and how many women go chasing after them. + +I'm just tired of all the shallow people, I have never met somebody as deep +as me. All my friends and girls I've been with never think like I do. Well, +baby, I got a spiritual, physical, and mental treasure just waiting to be +discovered right here. I'm like a comet in the sky, passing you by, +vanishing like the twilight at night. You've got to hop on the train before +it's too late, it's like the chance of a lifetime. . + +By the way, to whatever asked me why I was on this forum... Let me tell you +this, man. I've come here to learn more about astrophysics not ASStroholes. +Do you feel me? There's no fear as long as your vision is crystal-clear. +% +Also, what�s with posting your own blog to digg? �Hey, I shamlessly +advertise my own ridiculous existance on the intarweb! Please blogroll me +and dl my podcast!� +% +why dont animated gifs come with sound :( +% +i brush my teeth standing up. i also like to pee or shit standing up while +doing so. sometimes i spit backwash on my penis and let it dry. it looks +like that one time i slept over my uncle's house. oh btw i live in the +freshman dorms. room 310. stop by and see me sometime. +% +I am officer David Green, badge no. 1039283 you are in violation of +Intellectual Property and High Technology Technical Amendments Act of 2002, +Division C, Title III, Subtitle B of the 21st Century Department of Justice +Appropriations Authorization. I must ask that you cease and desist +immediately if not we will take action and contact the server that this site +is on and force them to give us your ip, and we will then contact your ISP +which will lead us to you. This is a very real and very serious threat. +Remove the link immediately. This is your one and only warning. +% +Poop is mostly shades of brown or yellow, but other colors can arise under +certain circumstances. For example, someone with a bleeding ulcer might have +tarry black poop from the presence of partially digested blood. Bleeding in +the intestine, from an anal fissure or split, for example, can stain the +poop red. Bloody poop can also be a sign of colon cancer, so you should get +it checked out by a doctor if you see blood in your stool. Some illnesses in +babies gives them green or even blue-green poop. But another source of blue +poop in children is more innocent: it can come from eating a concentrated +source of blue food coloring such as ice cream. Intense red food coloring +can produce bright red poop. Sometimes brightly colored foods pass through +the gut almost unchanged, and the turd may be speckled with bright red +fragments such as pimentos, or bright yellow kernels of corn. +% +I converted so easily. Just this morning, my nostrils were sneering at a +murky glass of bladder-beverage that I poured out of my penis. "Do it," I +scolded myself. "Transcend the stench; it's cheaper than aspirin." Boldly, I +chugged three gulps of my piddle -- yeech! My esophagus bucked +disagreeably... My pee is too hot and salty! It's icky! +% +I'm extremely liberal, yet I don't mind the government getting involved in +our personal lives in order to keep us safe from terrorism. I'm also ok with +racial profiling. +% +You obviously know little about what's being talked about. We'll see, and +I'll quote you later when you're proven wrong. +% +I eat exclusively from the following list of 12 foods: Almonds/nuts, +Berries, Oats/whole grain cereal, vegetables (especially green leafy), Beans +and Legumes, Nonfat Dairy products, Eggs, Lean Meats (especially turkey), +peanut butter, olive oil, Whey protein, and Whole Grain Bread (which falls +under oats/cereals). My colon is immaculate, and my bowel movements are +enormous, dense, and dry as a biscuit. +% +I've been using IRC for years now, I love it, it is one of the best chat +programs on the internet +% +Sex is a beautiful thing and it should not be restricted to certain age +limits. It should be enjoyed by old people right down to toddlers. And why +not? Yeah, I hear the jokes about Catholic priests. But people should just +shut the fuck up and let others explore the deep, mysterious cave that is +SEX. I mean, don't knock it until you try it. Don't say it's bad until +you've had your stiff PENIS shoved so far up a childs tight little pussy, +you cant say shit. +% +Someone from the ip address "66.103.132.86" has been performing port scans +and other malicious things on my computer such as DoS attempts and intrusion +attempts wich in turn has made my internet speed drop because this person is +doing it so much and it is just destroying my bandwidth. Please tell them to +stop. No, actually, force them to stop. +This e-mail address showed up when I back traced the IP address and +preformed a whois search on it. If you are not responsible for the actions +of this person, please ignore this e-mail. If nothing is done about it, keep +this in mind: I'm a 15 year old hacker with alot of time on my hands. +Therefore, if you don't stop this person, I will. I just thaught I would go +about it the right way before I did anything. +% +Yo what kinda chili u into? I'm all about the Green Serrano, Red Serrano, +Cayenne, Datil, Dried Red Serrano, Ancho, Francisca, Scotch Bonnet, New +Mexican, Banana, Savinas, Pimento, BrilliantStars, Poblano, Red Thai, Hot +Wax, Dried New Mexican, Jalepeno, Dearbol, Tepin, Habanero, Aji-Amarillo, +Bell, Dundicut, Tequilla, Tien-Tsin, Hungarian, Tabasco, Piquin chillis and +don't forget the Crazy Chilli too! +% +My d20 is carved out of a solid piece of pure onyx with ruby inlet numbers. +It was valued at over $2000. It has an operating system (made by Microsoft) +that automatically seeks out any other d20s on the table and crushes them. +Anything larger than a d20, laser shoot out and destroy that useless piece +of plastic. It can track a pewter figure from 1.3 miles away. DMs fear my +d20 because it allows me to cheat without much effort. I simply say "roll a +20" and it does. All other d20s are obsolete. +% +when you make love to a pregnant lady, you get a hand job from her baby, +cold rubbin' it makin' it crazy, till I'm leakin' out all my man gravy ohh +yeah +% +Y0 what kind of crimes u into? im all about a plan to kidnap a person / rape +them / torture them / kill them / cutting off da head / drain da body of +blood / rape da corpse / eat da corpse / dispose of da organs and bones / +finish ff7 +% +The fish I buy are only the finest sushi-grade specimens raised in the +pristine nurseries of Fuji-ura; a lake of pure rainwater which has lay +hidden for millenia in a lush, sun-drenched crater atop Mt. Fuji. Go back to +your newspaper-wrapped already dead for 12 hours vulcanized supermarket +fish. I wouldn't be caught dead with that filth in my immaculate kitchen. +% +Thanks for noticing, for getting an on topic first post I was bitch slapped +into karma oblivion. At least two people with mod points went back and +knocked down all my previous posts to -1 with trolls, off topics and +redundants. I was banned form posting for twenty-four hours and I'm not +allowed to meta-moderate anymore:( There some mean people on /. +% +Would you like my resume? I write code in everything from mainframe COBOL on +OS/360-OS/390 systems (OS/VS COBOL, MVS COBOL, etc) to C/C++ and Java. I +think I know what the hell I'm talking about, nerd. Have you visited my +corporation's website? Feel free to read the article about me. It's on the +front page. Do you have some more inane nerd blather, or is it time for some +Totinos? I thought so. +% +I'm a truck driver and would love to meet other transgendered truckers and +would love to meet any Lady truckers that enjoy being with a transvestites. +% +every guy i hook up with ends up getting AIDS. i tested positive for HIV, so +i think it was me. sorry guys, but maybe you should think before blaming it +all on me. you could have at least used those STD testers on me first, so +dont act like its all my fault. but anyways, sorry. +% +Yes, perhaps embracing your status as a social misfit will allow you to +appear "edgy" and "cool" as you're going through the pile of dirty clothes +on your floor desparately looking for anything that isn't encrusted with +either microwave burrito glop or your rancid dried semen +% +I played diablo for like 12 hours straight on my couch, slowly sliding into +a position that was almost parallel with the floor. At some point I realized +my head was the only part of me still on the couch, and I decided that was a +retarded way to sit, but by that point I couldn't move. I fell over and +dropped my laptop. My back was spasming so bad I almost pissed myself. In a +vain attempt to alleviate the pain I crawled into the shower and turned on +blasting hot water. That was no help, but it did soak my tshirt. After 15 +minutes of crying on the bathroom floor wearing a soaked and freezing tshirt +I found a pair of scissors in a droor and cut the shirt off. I passed out +from pain in a bunch of dirty towels and q-tips. Never felt anything like +that, not before and not after. Awful. +% +Hey girl, what kind of irc chatters r u into? I'm into pimply overbearing +misfits, power-mad failures with an axe to grind, faceless idlers, 'Zany' +wannabees, creepy pedophiles, dickless unix freaks, shit-eating mac users, +clueless windoze faggots, 'professional' web designers, legally blind php +coders with herpes, geriatric lechers on social security, gun nuts on +federal disability, and ambitionless retards working the night shift. +% +My name is Paul. If my name were to be used in a function it would used as +such. Paul > You. I'm an investment banker. I am scared of daylight, so I +stay indoors until 2am. I order in all my meals not because I like eating +take out on a daily basis, but because I am so excited to get back to work +and look at my multiple lcd screens with spreadsheets open all over the +place. Casual friday means I can roll up my sleeves, but I don't because I +don't want to wrinkle my custom tailored shirts I buy from Bergdorf Goodman. +I like to get my shoes shined multiple times a week, not because I want them +to look clean and shiny, but because everyone who is line can admire my +alligator gucci loafers that cost more than their LCD TV. I like business +cards, so I can hand you one and you can hand me one, if yours looks cooler +you better be careful or you will end up like Paul Allen on American Psycho, +but that probobly wouldn't happen because yours says marketing +representative, or senior sales associate and mine says investment banker. I +sometimes wish I had a life outside of the fast lane, but who the hell wants +to drive slow? If our lives were cars I'd be the 911 turbo and you'd be the +Taurus or the Civic SI (for those of you gunners). I like to look at people +and smile and nod, not because I'm a nice or friendly guy, but because they +are just another person that I passed in the race called life. I flaunt +money because, that's the only thing I have that you don't have. You +probobly have free time, a life, hobbies etc. I have money. Money can't buy +happiness, but it can buy whatever the Fuck I want. +% +A buddy of mine actually had both of his computers confiscated by the FBI. +Apparently someone had spoofed his IP (or maybe hacked into his wirless) and +made a whole bunch of fraudulent purchases. About 8 months later, the FBI +decided to give him his computers back? with all his fursona's files +mysteriously deleted. This is an outrage. +% +I was stuck in traffic one day and just kinda thought it would be funny to +masturbate. It was sunny and clear out, so I was worried one of the other +drivers would see me, but my jeep is pretty high off the ground, so I think +no one noticed. I busted a nut and aimed it down, ruining my tweety bird +floor mat. I felt kinda stupid after and my mom kept silent the rest of the +drive home. It was awkward and I regret it. +% +I wish that i was Vegeta from dragonball z. Once while stoned i tried to do +a kamehameha and im sure my hands got hot. Im planning on picking a fight +and while the adrenaline is flowing, im going to turn super saiyan and +punish my opposition. Goku is stronger but Vegeta is cooler, im 38 with two +kids.... my kids are weaklings, my wife left me and i like the way womans +shoes make my calves look. +% +earlier tonight i went into chat and no one spoke to me. i don't know what +i've done to anyone...but i guess whatever it is..it was enough for people +to stop talking to me. some may think 'well, it's just chat...right?'. well +unfortunately, chat is all i have. the only friends i have are online. +% +Three guesses as to who was asked to leave the Starbucks; oh, and told "not +to come back" with my "hateful rhetoric". True enough, I just said I hate +niggers; but the problem is, everything I said WAS TRUE! +% +I am the world's foremost expert on sticking people's treasured items into +my urethra. I have 'gauged' it to the point where I can almost wedge a +piece of celery in there, though no one treasures celery. If anyone can +beat this, I'd like to suck their dick! +% +i like my urls like i like my women...dirty and mangled +% +The message is pretty clear. Whenever two sheep herding white guys get +together, they allow their animal instincts to take over and they buttfuck +each other and fall in love. Then, they live a lie and sneak out repeatedly +to hook up and fuck each other's asses until they bleed. Then the wives find +out and divorce them. Or, the dumb ass bimbos dont know that their husbands +try on their clothers while they are away. The cinetography was beautiful +the soundtrack, etc. But the message (written by a chink) is still one of +deception, love, and faggotry. Sorry. +% +There is no doubt that white boys do play video games well. Having been run +off the football field, basketball court, and track by more athletic black +boys, white boys retreat to their computers and video games. Unfortunately, +this only makes their unathletic bodies weaker, thus seriously harming their +concept of masculinity and making them social outcasts with females. +% +Did you know? The origins of the tooth fairy date back to the early 1800s. +According to linguist and accredited historian Michael Quinion, the "Toothe +Faerie" was first documented in 1825, when dental hygiene was beginning to +gain momentum due to studious work of the "father of dental hygiene", Alfred +C. Fones. Fones solicited young boys for -- at first innocent, but +increasingly violent -- oral sodomy in exchange for their freshly uprooted +teeth, in some cases having been recorded as persuading youths to perform +these acts of love shortly after the dental work. Over the course of his +career, unbeknownst to local authorities, Fones began to encourage large +amounts of subsequent generations of virginial youths to procure payment in +addition to these sexual favors in order to retrieve their dislodged teeth, +thereby setting an example for burgeoning homosexual men of all ages to +come. Due to the local vernacular of the time, the good doctor's casual +title "Magister Dentali" was eventually replaced with our more modern +colloquialism once enough of the population had become familiar with the +tale. +% +Did You Know? After maintaining a vow of silence for almost 7 years, Red Hat +Linux founder Marc Ewing now freely admits that he named Red Hat Linux after +Limp Bizkit frontman Fred Durst's trademark red New York Yankees baseball +cap. +Durst and Ewing met in Ewing's hometown of Raleigh, North Carolina (Durst +was raised in Gastonia, NC), where they became fast friends, sharing the +same passion for low-level system programming. +Durst collaborated with Ewing on the first preview beta of Red Hat Linux +before the demands of his rocketing stardom forced him to abandon his hobby +and tour with his band. +Durst's position on the development team was filled by Damien Neil, and not +many know of his contribution to the popular Linux distribution; however, a +google search through the source code on Redhat.com +(http://www.google.com/search?q=wfd+site:redhat.com) reveals many snippets +of code authored by 'wfd', Durst's initials (William Frederick Durst). +Durst asked Ewing to keep his 'geeky' roots a secret as it would not lend +itself to Durst's bad boy image, but as Ewing points out, it was "only a +matter of time" before the origins of his NASDAQ-100 company's name were +uncovered. +% +If you listen to all of the cds that ICP has put out, and really put some +thought into what ICP is saying on them, there are some very strong +references to all things biblical. I mean you're really gonna hafta look +past all of the "chicken huntin" and things like that. It's not really like +the D.C. is its OWN religion, its more like it follows Christianity very +heavily. As far as the shangri-la (heaven), The Great Milenko (the devil), +and things of that nature, all stand for different aspects of the Bible. I +dunno, im kinda babbling here, so perhaps if i refer you to a web page +you'll understand more. +% +At the age of about 5, in the bath, I was playing with my lego men, jungle +animals, duplo etc. I needed to pass wind, so i did (with a little effort) +satisfied, I returned to playing with my toys. I reached for the black +gorilla king of the jungle and brought it up to my face, only to find it was +my shit. +% +ok, I know i'm married with kids but there is this chick at work who totally +flirts with me all the time. She's not into me or anything but she totally +flirts with me. I don't exactly not flirt back, and I +fantasize about her all the time. nothing will happen between us because i'm +such a pussy. oh yah, shes 6 years old +% +One time I offered my diabetic friend some reeses pieces, which he refused, +saying he would get sick. I assured him that he would be fine and he gobbled +up a whole handful without getting sick at all. The next day he asked me +where he could get more of this special treat, and I told him that he had +not eaten candy at all, but rather "feces pieces". +% +Heh. Don't you guys know that arguing on the internet is like participating +in the special olympics? Even if you win, you're still retarded. In fact, +there's an image out there on this interweb of ours that conveys this +message perfectly... +% +have you ever been squatting down and just, you know, tucked in your neck, +you know? and closed your eyes? and then put your forehead down on the +ground, you know? and then you know, leaned forward a little bit, you know, +shifted your weight? and then just lifted your posterior up in the air, +pushed hard, you know, and watched yourself take a gigantic shit on another +man's chest? man, there should really be a name for doing this. +% +pick on me thru a monitor, i doubt it would happen in rl +% +I know Africa has its own internet connection.. buncha niggers with mailbags +run around for email.. Tech Support is like shakalakuzulu kuntakente cheifs +that speek jigabooese +% +Since you like looking at women, I think it's about time you get your cherry +busted. Yes, you need to get laid. Nursing homes are full of old hotties +that would be willing to give their all to please. Since they are mostly in +wheelchairs, they don't even have to kneel. Think about it, dude! In fact, +think about those wrinkled, diapered old women every time you wank. Think, +visualize, wrinkled dry pussy, depends, gums only, shit breath, saggy +tits........ +% +This is why it is so tough for Microsoft to break into the Japanese market. +They have a different mentality. THe Japanese have a more demure way of +doing business. They always strive for honor in all that they do. +% +Is it politically correct on this list to trash Microsoft and show destain +for money? If so, I must protest. Microsoft is the best thing that ever +happened to computer users, ever. It will never, never be replaced by user +unfriendly software like linux or TeX. Never. +% +no sooner had the last inch of snow fallen in New York when the blogosphere +came alive with myriad sepia filtered grainy photos of the wintry landscape, +long, disjointed poetry about the ruthlessness of mother nature, and +helpless nerds half-joking pleas for rescue +% +girl i must be dick cheney because i want to fire my weapon into your back +% +oh well, I'm smarter than almost everyone I ever met in my whole fucking +life, so I'm not worried about my filthy habits heh +% +Second-best sex? Tell that to a Linux programmer who's got a slice of pizza +in one hand, his hideously empurpled member in the other and a Natalie +Portman tribute website firmly plastered across Firefox... +% +Chinese/Korean/Japanese don't look alike. If you think they are alike then I +guess all white people are the same too. You dumb crackers. +% +I had a dream (nightmare really) last night that the coffee industry in +South America was hit by a blight that made all coffee toxic which caused +death for anyone who drank a cup. The entire Web 2.0 startup scene crashed +and the bubble popped. Flock went under and Yahoo stopped buying everyone. +Not fun. +% +Ookles? I don't know but it's Web 2.0 compliant and has a nice prototype.js +transition when you register for their private beta. +% +By the way, I've seen you play DDR in real life. You didnt know I was a +goon, but I was there. Watching. Waiting. Planing. +% +I like to take a toothbrush and stick it in my anus. I get into the shower +and sit up straight so that it gets as deep as possible. This feels great +and there is no pain. Then you can jack off and move up and down just like +you?re riding a real cock. It feels GREAT! +% +Fuck all authority figures of any type. Now instead of hearing the song and +letting it pass by you I think we should all rise against and do somin about +authority..... and they can feel the rage of OUR generation!!!!!!!!!!!!! +% +lol no 1 has 1 that they will give out to even members here i doubt ud get 1 +i cant find 1 and iv been looking over a month every hour .. u gota look +maby ull find 1 or learn to make i tried and failed so i dono wht to say but +u wont get 1 im sure.. thats just hwo it is i wish i had 1 my self +% +ILYAZAYUZIN.......HAHAHAHA...FIRST OFF TELL ME WHERE IV'E BEEN PRAISING +VANILLA ICE. SECONDLY STOP ACTING LIKE A RETARD INTERNET THUG AND GET OFF 2 +PAC'S NUTSACK YOU 15 YEAR OLD WANNABE WANKSTA.GO LISTEN TO YOUR BONE THUGS +AND HARMONY WHILE I STICK SOME 7L AND ESOTERIC ON YOU CHUMP!!!!!PEACE TO THE +REAL UNDERGROUND HEADS! +% +I'm usually at the club on Sunday night, and they will have Adult Swim +playing on the TVs behind the bar. Having Boo-Boo Runs Wild on at the exact +time every Sunday gives me a good visual clue that the night is starting to +run its course, and that I should make it my last round so that I'll be +sober enough to drive. (So I can get home and watch the night's lineup as I +taped it.) +% +In stark terms, Wikipedia is one of the single most important undertakings +in human history. If we do our job, future generations will look upon +Wikipedia as the cornerstone of the information revolution. If we don't, the +world will lose a tremendous resource. This is why we need to keep the jews +out. +% +You're a huge assblaster. You're like one huge slimey smelly rocket, flying +through space at speeds unknown to man, and shooting off fumes which +slightly resemble broccoli and rotted meat. But it's ok, because your +flaccid asscheeks, worn from shits that rival the titantic herself, will +make up for the kinetic energy lost from your inefficient use of the natural +gas the infinitely spews from your cum-filled stomach. +% +Meth is the shortest word in the English language one can lisp while drunk +and underage at a gay bar. It can therefore be no surprise that homosexual +males have congregated around the substance since its inception. For every +meth mouth, there is an equal and opposite meth dick. +% +Found you folks by accident...decided that underground should actually mean +underground...although pop-up occur from time-to-time. The revolution will +be VOIPed AND blogged. +% +I hope I never have to hear any of these cosplay slangs ever at a +convention. Anime Iowa is a place to have fun and to enjoy being surrounded +by fellow fans. Not a place to treat other fans in a superior fashion. +*Most of us experienced or are experiencing this in highschool* +% +And yeah, I didn't want to get into this, either. It's just that I'm fucking +sick to death of furs bagging on other furs just to blow up their own egos. +This is what the real problem is in the fandom that "gives us a bad rep". +While we're all squabbling over stupid lil mediocre differences like +children on a playground, the rest of the world thinks we're all a bunch of +skunk fuckers anyways. It's all very inane. +% +I hear you brought a prepubescent kid to a "FurBQ" event a while back. I +wonder that that kid's guardians would think if they knew the things you +jerked off over, or that you get an erection mentally undressing kids you +see on the street. I wonder what people at your job would think, or what +your parents would think. Maybe you should wonder those things too. +% +I disagree with the software "Fruity Loops" on the grounds that only 50% or +less of the musicians that use this software are actually homosexual. I +think they need to either change the name of the software, or have some kind +of provision in the EULA that you can only use it if you're gay. Stop faking +the funk already. +% +I used to watch Dragon Ball Z, and it was cool, and Transformers is awesome +too. But one thing I never got about anime is why do they have big eyes? +It's from Japan, that should mean small eyes. +% +I've had sex with a dinosaur, horse, sheep and cow in my dreams +% +Anyone who has taken Linguistics 101 and actually paid attention would be +well aware that English uses no subjunctive tense. For you see, gerunds and +participles aren't tenses, my friend. As much as I enjoy your witticisms +and laughably incorrect "facts", I'd prefer that you research it. +% +Hey gurl what u into? I'm all about the blunt force injuries with no blood +and resulting in blood on body and clothing, blood splattering from wounds, +death with eyes open, cutting injuries with no blood, screaming in pain and +resulting in blood on body, severed limbs, blood spurting from wounds, +entrails seen, and death. +% +I was watching myself everynight. Eventually I found myself very attractive, +and I finally realized my ability to make her love me. So I raped her. But I +later found she was a slut since she didn't want to marry me. So, I raped +her again. I think she loves me now. +% +What kind of anime u into? I'm all about the Inu yasha, saiyuki, get +backers, spiral, furuba, you're under arrest, soul hunter (houshin engi), +tokyo underground, samurai deeper kyo, flame of recca, mirage of blaze, gate +keepers, real bout high school, street figter, fatal fury, dnAngel, +gravitation, yami no matsuei, theif and detective, prince of tennis, +juvenile orion, aporipha0, orphen, angelic layer, shama pita ten, kaiken +phrase, FAKE, himiko den, kiddy grade, lost universe, slayers, burn up W, +for you in full blossoms, fushigi yuugi, gundam wing, yuyu hokushou, hunter +x hunter, sakura wars, cardcaptor sakura, tokyo babylon, magic knights +rayearth, scrapped princess, infinite ryvius, witch hunter robin, mahou +senshi riui, Furi Kuri, gundam seed, vampire princess miyu, king of bandits +jing, rave, E's Ot Gojyo (saiyuki), Sanada Yukimura (samuria deeper kyo), +Hiroshi (gravitation), Inu yasha, Ban (get backers), Akabane (get backers), +Heartia (orphen), Iori (King of Fighters), Taikoubo (houshin engi), Kyou +(furuba), Kazuma (scryed), Larva (vampire princess miyu), Shigure (furuba), +Ken (weiss kreuz), Dark (dnAngel), Kurama (yuyu hakushou), Akabane (get +backers), Touga (utena), Shido (nightwalker), Ryuhou Quatre (gundam wing), +Amon (witch hunter robin), Michael (witch hunter robin), Riui (mahou senshi +riui), Shido (nightwalker), Jing (king of bandits jing), Yuuki (e's +otherwise", Kai (e's otherwise), Eagle (magic knights rayearth), Clef (maigc +knights rayearth), Enba (wildrock), Ken (Mata Natsu ga Kita), Haru (rave), +Magica (rave) +% +I have a cat trap in my back yard and its pretty fun to check the cage on a +friday night and choke a cat to death while you are half snapped. sometimes +ill even follow up with a jerk session and blow my semen all out on a dead +pussy. ohh yeah. +% +dude...listen...pretty much evry one hate him and microsoft, sure he's given +us some computer crap who cares, its all crap, i hate windows so much, its +the crapyest piece of shit ever, i want linux! +% +Everyone who has had sex and said it wasn't that great are people who have +only had sex with people they don't really care about. It's disappointing to +just stick your dick in any girl, but if it's a childhood friend or your +daughter, it's so much better. +% +If your daughter listens to hip hop music, you should caution her against +taking MDMA, commonly known as ecstasy if she plans to go to hip hop +concerts or hip hop clubs. As everyone knows, when you add E to rap, you get +RAPE. +% +Hello. I have a girlfriend. She has long orange hair which she wears with +hairpins. She never removes her hairpins as they are worn in memory of her +brother while her hair is worn long in honor of the promise Tatsuki once +made to protect her. One of my girlfriend's more distinct characteristics is +a large bust. +% +Before I dropped out of college, I strove to be as different from everyone +else as I could be, reading manga and blasting JPOP music in my car. +% +So, I met this fat, skanky nigger bitch who wanted to fuck me, 'cause she'd +never had a white man. I said sure, took her home and got her all hot and +bothered. Then I hit her over the head with a crowbar. Just before she lost +conscienceness, I told her I'd never defile my white cock on a nigger ape +and shit in her face. Then I beat her to death with the crowbar. I ground +her carcass up in a meat grinder and made nigger patties. +% +Ummmm....you are trying to equate "ratings" for fucking PODCASTS with that +of TV? Even digital cable TV? A Podcast is a big hit with a few thousand +downloads. 99% of hte wolrd doesn't gie a fuck about Podcasts. OK, maybe not +99%, since the world is about 10% homosexual. But 100% of heterosexuals have +NEVER listened to a podcast, or read a blog in their lives. +% +You're really a failure at life, you're 290 pounds, you've got horrible back +hair, you sweat profusely, staining all your white clothes yellow, and +you've killed 3 dogs by anal impaction. +% +Little known fact: "Chimney Sweeps" from Dickensian literature actually did +not clean chimneys in a literal sense, as soot would take centuries to build +up to the point where airflow in a typical chimney was obstructed. Instead +these young boys were paid for performing analingus on as many as 30 wealthy +gentlemen per day. +% +When I masterbate I fantasize about strange things. Like shitting in other +peoples mouths while I watch them slowly drown in quicksand. I wish I wasn't +so fucked up. What's worse is that seems like the only way I can get off. +% +The average man's body in this country is an absolute embarrassment. Mother +Nature has got to be ashamed. The average man is a flabby, frail mess of a +joke, a complete and utter mockery of a physical sham. The average man is +feeble, fat and functionless. The only time he ever moves his engorged, +slovenly body is when he shoves another slice of pizza down his throat, +scratches his ass or belches out the national anthem. +% +My data are extrusively and exclusively sorted, indexed, and metaindexed. My +indices are stored and accessed on a plethora of nodes over an ultra high +bandwidth optical pipe; any item of data in my vast collection is instantly +accessible by myself from anywhere on the planet. Go back to bubble sorting +your recipe card database. You cannot possibly compare with me. Good day. +% +So I'm sitting at my xterm in KDE hacking some kernel code, and this bitch +comes up to me and says "Do you know which of these computers runs Windows?" +Well that did it. I flipped up my shades and looked her straight in the eye +and said "Fuck no I'm open source bitch". I picked up my 10 lb IBM Model M +keyboard and said "I can kick your ass at 120wpm" and broke it over the +cunt's head. She dropped to her knees and I kicked the jewel case out of her +hand and into her teeth. Next I grabbed her by the neck and said "How's your +uptime" before suplexing her backward through the air and into the server +room. Some smoke that smelled like burning hair started to drift out so I +jumped on my razor scooter and rode off into the sunset. +% +Hello. I am interested in various things, which include: Finding out your +real life info(s), prank calling you every day, stealing your IRC +nickname(s), and finding flaws in your website (i.e. loading popups, etc). +% +girl, i must be cervical cancer because i'm totally eating your pussy +% +Furcism is just as bad a racism jackass, if you dont have anything +intelligent to say shut the fuck up.... Obviously furry is in demand if the +mod created a board for it, therefore he needs to fix the link, and you can +just avoid it with your furcist ass. Geez im getting tired of lil pricks +saying stupid shit. May a tiger eat your entrails..... +% +My Fleshlight massages my penis at a rate of 2700 RPMs and feels like 250 +preteen girls giving me a handjob simultaneously. It's encrusted with +flawless 36 karat conflict diamonds straight from the heart of Africa. It's +powered by an experimental plutonium alloy battery and has a constant +run-time of well over 3 years. It has 4 settings, as opposed to yours which +has only 2 settings (on and off). No other fabricated orifice can compare +to my Fleshlight. +% +woke up around 3pm pretty hung over - i got a new pair of jeans they are the +brand wild ass which is pretty good has alot of places to stash shit like +knives,hammers leathermens drank a pot of coffee and read the drudge report +and huffington post sat outside near some fresh dog shit and smoked 5 +cigerettes as my dogs barked at me put on my boots and off we fucking go to +clean out the swamp coolers of rich college kids who live a block from the +campus - you gota first get on the roof then you unlatch these metal clamps +on all corners then fuckin valium hits you hard you undo the belt so it +doesnt break w/ frost bite - then you drain the water out of them and turn +off electricity and water routing to the swamp coolers - any one of you +fucking fucks out there with a swamp cooler your gona die some day fucking +disgusting you stash some shit up there like a piegeon or a wasps nest n let +it soak and blow fuckin air and whatever the fuck i let into your swamp +cooler soak in your room - you better fuckin belive it if i sweep up anymore +cig butts outside the f uckin final fantasy soundtrack lovin fuckin failed +frat boys yard im gona put a bag of kimchee and chicken grease fuckin sars +in his face and ass from sucking the wind of the d - low blood sugar valium +and a hang over i fuckin put the shit back together as hot fuckin college +ass walks by constantly so i start to head down off the roof theres a sort +of ledge then a fence then the ground - but then i see into one of the +neighbors yards and it looks like a sort of stable? so i kinda jumped from +the roof into their yard but my boots fuckin get stuck on the rain gutter +and i flip forward face into the wall upside down kidna fall back onto the +floor it smells really bad and the pain is unbearable and i hear a sort of +weird snorting sound the door to the stable is open and allthough im hurt +pretty bad nothing is broke -0 i just sort of limp into the stable to see +whats up and theres this beutiful donkey there - a great ass/mule im not +sure what kind of breed it was but it wsa really friendly and let me pet its +mane it said my leg would feel better soon cuz of the valium and i thought +that was funny i sorta sat down in the corner cuz of the leg pain and +noticed i was sitting in a pile of the donkeys shit - wet dry all together - +my wild ass jeans were soaked and there were flies everywhere - the pony +donkey thing just sort of looked at me and smiled like horses/donkeys/bears +do and i smiled back cuz wtf im allready pretty fucked so i start to stand +up but the girafe sort of moves its ass so my head bumps into its really +toned ass - i cant help but notice that its massive cock is in fact a +donkeys vagina - i look up at her pretty pony face and she smiles back so i +just dove into that pussy where you at dog you know what im saying - fist +into ass pushed in pretty far so i could feel around in the mule's stomach +and slowly i felt that she had a sort of hernia? so i pushed a lil farther +(my jacket was fucked at this point) and i found that the hernia let me push +my arm all the way through to her beutiful unicorn vagina for the first time +i have fisted someone through both hinde sex cavities - but something +spooked that old black man and he started to run with me attatched my +girlfriend who works with me on the landscaping saw me from over the wall +and my arm slurped out of the small scotty dogs ass it was disgusting and +embarrasing +% +I'm new to this channel, but I would just like to tell you that you are an +inspiring individual. I appreciate your efforts. I'm not a pedophile myself, +but I happen to enjoy viewing lolicon on a regular basis, so I'm well aware +of the prejudices you face. Never stop fighting for what you believe in. +% +GET TROOPS OUT OF IRAQ BUCK FUSH CONSERVATIVES ARE GAY NO BLOOD FOR OIL +WRONG WAR WRONG PLACE WRONG TIME FRIENDS DONT LET FRIENDS VOTE REPUBLICAN +BUSH&DICK: GOOD IN BED BAD IN DA WHITEHOUSE my brother raped me when i was 6 +% +You know, I find it hard to say that something that has freed 50 million +iraqi people from oppression and death is a bad thing. +% +My friend, I bet you haven't read the terms and conditions for this +forum.... Take cover, you are about to be flamed! +% +My new XBOX 360 controller is one out of ten collector's editions ever made. +Handcrafted from a block of pure platinum, the buttons are various precious +and semiprecious stones, expertly cut and polished to brilliance by noted +Japanese philosopher and artisan Inazo Nitobe. It can operate in wireless +mode from over 3km away, and the force feedback is powerful enough to slice +through a four inch pane of glass. +% +While the argument does not really say much being on a PG-rated television +program, Data never reveals his genital region on screen. This makes +confirmation fo genitals by direct examination impossible. +% +Japanese is such a sound poor language... it's impossible for them to say a +lot of english sounds, LET ALONE German which is much more complex soundwise. +% +I think now is a good time to honor ourselves with some put-ups. You know, +instead of put-downs? +% +Rather than being birthed like a normal child, Norris instead punched his +way out of his mother's womb. Shortly thereafter he grew a beard. Before +email was invented Chuck Norris would attach messages to kittens and +roundhouse kick them. The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain. Chuck +Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried. When Chuck Norris has +sex with a man, it is not because he is gay, but because he has run out of +women. Chuck Norris does not have AIDS but he gives it to people anyway. +Chuck Norris has yet to get a Jeopardy question wrong. Jesus has missed two. +Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and +unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was +finalized, Chuck roundhouse kicked the devil in the face and took his soul +back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he +should have seen it coming.. +% +A plane is standing on a runway that can move (some sort of band conveyer). +The plane moves in one direction, while the conveyer moves in the opposite +direction. This conveyer has a control system that tracks the plane speed +and tunes the speed of the conveyer to be exactly the same (but in opposite +direction). +The question is: Will the plane take off or not? +The answer: Yes! +The plane will take off if there is enough difference between the speed of +the air and the plane. The plane speed RELATIVE to the air speed over the +wings is half that of the plane relative to the conveyor. +Basically, it depends on how fast the conveyor moves, consequently how fast +the plane moves forward. If it reaches (about) 220 mph, it will take off. +% +Carefull there friend, posting a blog message claiming that my users are not +mature might just cause the masses to come over here and attack your site. +Next thing you know, you will be dDOS attacked, and spammed in your comments +section. +% +Did You Know: As late as 1987, instruction booklets included in the classic +Parker Bros. board game "Monopoly" contained directions for appointing one +player as "The Jew"? It was not until the early 90s that references to "The +Jew" were replaced by "The Banker" in all game packaging and accompanying +material. +% +Haha. Whatever. I'm in an animation college, and when I was in high school +girls used to BEG for picture from me, and it was the most attention I got +in school. Now everyone draws so it's not a big deal. If someone compliments +you, take it, because chances are I'm better than you, and would mock you +when you left the room. +% +I'm clicking your link, n00b, and nothing's happening. I'm clicking, bitch. +What's supposed to happen, fag? I'm clicking and nothing's happening, +fucktard. +% +I bet you think you're actually amusing. You were giggling to yourself as +you typed that line out, and are eagerly staring at your screen hoping that +someone will give you a zany quip in reply. Go on, you can laugh. It's okay. +Just remember that you're the only one who thought that comment was in any +way entertaining. +% +I bet you think you're actually amusing. You were giggling to yourself as +you typed that post out, and are eagerly refreshing this thread in the hopes +that someone will give you a zany quip in reply. Go on, you can laugh. It's +okay. Just remember that you're the only one who thought that post was in +any way entertaining. +% +Presumably you're either joking, or you're not a web designer. +% +I'm very sorry to hear about your situation. I'll write a post about it on +BlogSpot and Xanga. Maybe we can also start a social bookmark campaign to +highlight your story. +% +For those who doubt the authenticity of these facts, note that I have a +doctorate in the Social Sciences from the University of Phoenix online, and +I have over thirty volumes on the subject in print via on-demand internet +publishing. Good day. +% +guns work like this - u buy the deagle at the spawn point and u get the +headshot +% +girl i must be the u.s. senate because i'm totally rejecting your timetable +for withdrawal of my troops +% +The government is too bureacratic and corrupt to accept the opinoin of an +average American. They don't care about us, and we shouldn't care about +them. We need a revolution right now. Start it with Linux. F**K the +government! +% +It should be extrusively notated (and annotated) that my imago has been +ensnared in the viscosity of time. That is why my transcendent self has been +importuned (but not without resisting) despite the hydraulic pressure to +limitate and delineate those theotons (the untimely microscopic, particulate +hydrole) whose essential god-like characteristics have been laminated into +an irreducibly minisculate, atomized, and indeed lionized cannister. Such is +the enraptured entrapment of my condition. +% +Boo hoo! So their PROFITS are down. That only means they're not stealing as +much from the poor. I call that a move in the right direction! Let's face it +folks! Companies only profit by exploiting the poor. The very existence of +poverty is all the proof you need! What do they need all of that money for? +They have a civic duty to share their ill-gotten fortunes with the society +they exploit to create their riches. Companies should be forced to operate +at a break-even limit. Any excess profit proves that they are charging too +much for their product, and exploiting the poor. Such immoral profiteering +should be illegal! There are so many people that need that money more than +those greedy, racist executive robber-barons! The slavery must end, people! +If we don't stick up for the poor now, who will fight for us when it's OUR +turn to be robbed? +% +I work for IBM. +So I am really getting a kick out of most of these replies. +Some of you guys are very good at making it sound like you know what you are +talking about. +But trust me.... You don't. +I think you just want to make yourself sound smart, when in reality you dont +know what you are talking about. +This is how bad info gets passed around. +If you dont know about the topic....Don't make yourself sound like you do. +Cuz some Slashdotters belive anything they hear. +% +I am pleased to inform you that I am currently drinking pure nutrients and +dense anti-oxidants in the form of fortified pomegranate nectar. During an +average meal I will drink no less than six liters of steeped oolong tea +imported mere hours before from his Holiness the Dalai Lama's private +garden. In short, the ratio of free radicals in your bloodstream as compared +to mine is immeasurably high. Good day. +% +I like to say these following words: 1.tit balls 2.penis nipples 3.doodie +poopy 4.pickleweasle 5.testicle poop 6.shit whore 7.shitless tit 8.penis +shrimp 9.loomis 10.super weiner discharge +% +i think this guy likes me. evertime we hang out, and do the least bit of +touching, he gets a boner, or atleast i thnk he does. but a boner is pretty +hard to miss. so im guessing yea.excepts ints ot thru hsi pants, he jsut +kidof tucks it in the part wiht tbuttons... the part were the belt goes. but +it still goes up, and im not hallucinating +% +put down that joystick, son, and get yourself to the bar; there are all +sorts of women out there waiting to take your money in exchange for a +pittance of shallow affection +% +Chimpanzees start mating immediately after menstruation has begun or +ejaculation becomes possible. Considering that we are animals, maybe it +wouldn't be strange for humans to start having sex at 12 or 13. +% +To most, it seems obvious that there is a God. If true, the universe has a +definite purpose. God made science. The old flat earth and geocentric +beliefs prove that the scientific community has been wrong before, and could +be again. Because of insufficient evidence to produce an objective finding, +many scientists have realized that much more faith is required for +Darwinism, than for Intelligent Design. +% +I went straight for the animation section in hopes of finding the newest +Prince Picha Picha tape, but unfortunately found the aisle littered with +shit like Yuko Hiba and Haldi Daldi Sucking a Penis. I go up to the stock +grunt that's in the aisle over and ask him why there are adult anime videos +taking up space in a family video store. He tells me to lower my voice, and +I tell him not to disrespect me like that again. He tells me that if I talk +back to him he'll have me thrown out of the store because he's the manager, +so I lower my sunglasses, look him in the eye and say "I guess you'll have +to MANAGE this" and hit him with a flurry of dragon punches straight in his +gut. Then I grab him by his collar and lift him straight up in the air and +ask him where the Kimba the White Lion tapes are, he says love you man, i +had my man back there trigger the silent alarm. "I may not be a lion, but +hear my roar" and I throw him 20 feet in front of me into the cash register, +"You're due back in six days". Three of his employees come running out of +the back room with nunchucks in their hands and I jump up on the counter, +latch onto the ceiling lights and twist their necks with my dangling legs +"Heh, talk about a light fixture". I leave the store, hop into my red +camaro, and blaze off into the sunset as Moni Hima's Chiba Chiba Surprise +plays on the radio. +% +Well, I walk in to buy some tissues, and at the counter, I hear the manager +talking about some skateboard punks in the back by the garbage bins. The guy +said he was about to have to call the cops. I told him there's no need to, +I'll take care of it myself. So, I walked to the back of the store, and lo +and behold, a couple of good for nothings were tearing the place up. A +couple of them asked me what I was doing here, so I took of my shades, +looked them straight in eye, and said, " Well boys, I'm here to take out the +trash, then I grabed one of their skateboards, and broke it over my knee. +Then, one of them threw a punch at me. I caught it, and looked thr punk +straight in the eye, and said " I'm afraid theres no need for you to be +recycled, then I threw him straight over my head into one of the garbage +dumpsters. Then, the rest of the kids ran away in fear. I was glad I could +help my community, and look good doing it. +% +So, I bought a couple of dvds off some web site a few weeks ago and I was +pretty upset they haven't come in the mail already. So today I stuck around +the house until the mailman came, he brought me a package but it wasn't the +dvds I was waiting for. I asked him what the problem was and he told me that +he had no control over when the company sends me the dvds. He said I should +try to contact them. That did it. I couldn't belive this guy, I pay my taxes +and this guy thinks he has the right to sass me in front of my euro mansion, +in my freaking driveway? I lifted up my shades, took the cigar out of my +mouth, looked him straight in the eye and said " I'm afraid this package is +marked return to sender", and then I threw the package in the air and +sidekicked the package right into the guys face causing teeth to go +everywhere. I then saw one of my ederly neighbors walking toward me so I +assumed he wanted trouble as well so I gave him a swift round kick to the +ribs, I then looked at him and said "time to take out the garbage" and hip +tossed him into the garbage can. I then picked up the crying mailman and +threw him into the garbage can, after I had my "garbage collected", I picked +up the garbage can and said "let the good times roll" and threw the garbage +can down the hill. I didn't see those two guys again but I don't really +care, I took the mailbag and threw it in my fireplace since it was a little +chilly here today. +% +I was in town with one of my girlfriends today, and I decided to play one of +those scratch off games again, I was very suprised when I won 1 million +dollars on the spot, this was like the second time I won the lottery. I was +about to claim my prize but then I thought to myself I'm already rich why +not have some fun with this one? I told my girlfriend I was tired of her +already so I left her at the gas station and went to find me some poor +suckers. What better place than wal mart? I went up and down the aisles +until I found a bad dressed man and wife along with their kid. I went up to +the guy and showed the guy the ticket, and told him since I didnt need the +money I was going to give it to him and his family, when he started to tear +up I tore up the ticket and threw the pieces on the ground. I then started +to walk away but this spinless punk then took a swing at me when my back was +turned. That did it. I turned around, took off my shades, looked him +straight in the eye and said "feeling lucky". I then gave him a swift kick +in the ribs and threw him into the pet section, I then caught a wal mart guy +coming at me so I took a knife out of my jacket and threw it toward a chain +holding up a sign, I then looked at the guy and said "watch out for falling +prices" and then the sign fell on him and knocked him out. I left the store +but not before I complained to the manager about the kind of people they let +in there. +% +So I was sitting in the back corner of eat �n park a restaurant in the +northeastern region and I hear this group of punk kids terrorizing their +waitress, and I stumble over there and ask the beautiful lady what the +problem seems to be. The kids being the adept punks they are give her a +glare that tells her not to talk or else therell be problems but I know +better than this and I tell them that if they don�t apologize to this +beautiful belle theyre going to have to answer to me. I pull my shades out +of my back pocket, slip a comb through my wet hair, and tell them they have +10 seconds to apologize. The leader of the gang a chubby kid tells me to get +loss and then throws the peg game on his table at my face. �I pegged you as +the wise sort, and I don�t play games!� says I, and I grab a tonfa from the +cop sitting at the table next to them and tell them today�s special, punks +served sunny side up, with a side of hollandaise. I crack the tonfa over two +punk heads, do a roundkick, and then hiptoss the runt of the crew into the +pie fridge. �Creamed or Key Limed? � I ask the cop as he slips me a fiver +and gives me a back high five. He tells me Ive done a good job as a citizen, +and I kiss the beautiful waitress on the cheek, run my comb through my hair +once more and leave the restaurant on my harley. +% +It was a nice day today so I went for a walk outside. As I was walking, I +heard somebody crying out in pain so I went to investigate, when I turned +the corner I saw a kid that had fallen off his bike and he was grabbing his +leg and crying. There was this guy already there and he told me that he was +a doctor and he thought this kid had a broken leg. I could tell this guy was +lying because he didn't have any white coat, I don't like liars so I pushed +him out of the way. My training in medical school showed me that I had to +get the kid's leg straight again, so I started pounding his knee to get the +bone straight again. Thats when the guy that claimed to be a "doctor" called +me a moron and pushed me out of the way. Well that did it. I got up, took my +shades off, looked him straight in the eye and said " open wide doc" and +then I gave him a swift kick to the mouth. I then grabbed him and said "time +to make a house call " and then I threw him through a window of a near by +house. The kid stopped crying then, I guess my pounding earlier worked. I +told the kid not to thank me but I did need 20 dollars for my time. He only +had 14 so I took his bike as well. I feel pretty good about fixing the kid's +leg. +% +Me and my friend went to fill up my corvette last night and there were these +two punks there sitting on the sidewalk of the gas station with their radio +blasting. I was trying to think as I pumped gas but their radio made that +hard to do. I was not pleased. So I went in and payed for the gas and then I +went up to the two punks outside. I said excuse me but I think you need to +turn your radio down. They told me to chill, they were just hanging out and +having a few smokes. I then looked them in the eye and said " I'm afraid +this is the no smoking section boys" and then I kicked their radio up +against the side of the gas station. Then one of them stood up and took a +swing at me, I ducked it and then gave him a roundhouse kick to the stomach. +Then the other one took what was left of the radio and threw it at me, I +blocked it with my left hand which caused it to go sailing back and knock +him out. Then a middle aged man which looked to be in his 50's came up and +asked what was going on. I wasn't sure if he was with me or against me so I +assumed he was against me, I then gave him a swift front kick to the groin +and hip tossed him on top of the other guys there. I then walked back to my +car where my friend just stood there in awe, I asked him why he didn't help +me and he said it looked like I had things under control. I slapped him and +pushed him to the ground and told him to walk home. I then got in my +corvette turned up the radio to full blast and much to my suprise welcome to +the jungle was playing. I then sped off with that song playing full blast. I +felt pretty good about standing up for my rights and I looked good doing it. +% +So, I was at work yesterday, and I happened to walk by this guy's desk. I +noticed on his computer screen that he had his personal E-mails pulled up. I +asked him who he thought he was to do this on company time, and then, he +told me that his daughter was sick at home, so he was checking up on her. I +then punched his computer screen out, and Look him straight in the eye and +said, " Who do you think I am? Jerry Lewis? I dont want to hear your sob +story, so get back to work before I get you fired." He then said a few +cusswords, and then, then He tried to punch me, I blocked it, then , I gave +him a swift, round kick to the groin. I asked him if he wanted some more, +and he came at me, again, so, I slapped him, then I hip tossed him into the +nearest filing cabinent. I looked Over my should at anther worker who was +standing near by, and I said...." File him under G..... for garbage." +Needless to say, I was quite pleased, because now, that means there one less +person in the company for people to look at. All eyes should be on me. I'm a +stud. +% +Me and one of my friends went out today for some dinner so we stopped at a +pretty nice restaurant. I don't smoke and most of the time I sit in the non +smoking section but I didn't feel like walking to the back of the restaurant +today so me and my friend sat at the first table we came to in the smoking +section. Since most ppl should be aware that I don't smoke I didn't think I +would have any problems. I was wrong. This jerk lit up a cigarette right +next to me. I couldn't belive this fat jerk was disrepecting me like this so +I turned around and looked him right in the eye and said " you might want to +put that out fag..........That is,if you value your health". The guy said a +couple of cuss words and told me to go to the non smoking section. Well that +did it. I got up went over to the table and said "excuse me fag but you +didn't clean your plate", and then I took his plate and bashed him over the +head with it. Then his friend that was with him got up and took a swing at +me, I ducked it and then gave him a swift round kick to the ribs. I then hip +tossed him on the table and then I turned around and looked one of the +waiters right in the eye and said "this orders to go" and then I tossed the +table with the guy on it a good 14 feet across the room. As me and my friend +were storming out the manager apologized to us but I told him it was too +late as I would never eat there again. +% +Hah, then you're depriving yourself of one of life's simple pleasures. +Picture a cool Saturday evening.. lights down low, the sun is setting, Mom +went out with her friends. You have a slice of pizza in one hand, a Guinness +in the other, and a fresh Gentoo install on two screens in front of you. +Nothing quite like it, my friend. +% +I came home this afternoon after picking up my copy of gta and I smelled +something funny from my neighbors house. I went over there and the door was +unlocked so I went right in. Sure enough there was my neighbor and two of +his friends smoking to their hearts content. I told them they had two +options, one- they could put the joints out or two- I would put the joints +out for them. My neighbor had run ins with me before so he knew I meant +business so he threw his joint down and told me to leave. I said you made a +wise choice but I'm still calling the cops and then I turned to leave. My +neighbor then got up off the couch got behind me and said a few cuss words +and told me to mind my business. His other friend ran into the kitchen so I +went after him. He was in the corner crying so I said "this is your brain" +and then I grabbed a frying pan and said "this is your brain on drugs" and +then I hit him in the head as hard as I could with the frying pan. After +that I called the cops and they came over and arrested my neighbor and his +friends. As I was leaving the sarge shouted out to me thanks. I then threw +my shades on the ground to let him know I meant business. I feel pretty good +about what I did for my neighborhood today. +% +This thread is just a remake of a thread I read months ago on an exclusive +forum you're too poor to have even heard of, which counts among its members +such superstars as Tiesto, Paul Van Dyk, Kenny Loggins, and Afrikaa +Bambaataa. Maybe someday you can come up with something original. +% +I have like 50,000 shells/vhosts/bncs. Bans won't do a thing except fill +your list. And 'get to where i am today' is a sad testament to your life +apparently. On a side note, I used to op other chans that are far bigger +than this chan. I didn't get ops by k/b'ing everyone in sight or anyone that +carried a touch of annoyance to me. I reserved k/bs for spammers and +flooders, that's it. Everyone else I /ignored +% +Swadi Ghilan's two sons were dropping their sister off at high school +earlier this year when a carload of Sunni Muslim insurgents pulled up and +emptied their AK-47s into their bodies. In broad daylight his children were +torn to pieces, their blood splashed against the windshield as they screamed +and died ohh yeah +% +excuse me, but i politely ask you to cease your torpid attempts at +manifesting versimilitude through your crude preferences of internet +lexicon. my comprehension of the english language is brobdingnagian, +effortlessly micrifying your picayune and odious disposition, of which has +already saturated me with a pullulating impression of ennui coupled with +execration. good day. +% +Some advice to you gentoo users out there: Why don't you emerge yourself +from that closet already you damn homo. +% +My computer typing skills surpass any of your so called 'talents'. I can +type 'internet relay chat' in the time it takes you to type 'IRC' (by the +way, acronyms are so pass�). I have 6 custom developed Das Keyboards +programmed to a vast array of languages. They are strategically placed +across my 3 tier, Mahogany desktop that I had customed ordered from France. +I can communicate with 3 different people simultanously while coding the +README updates for my unix distribution. Did I mention I have the all-time +high score on Mavis Beacon? You have nothing on my impressive typing skills. +Thought so. +% +The way I look at it, you atheists are basically like this: "Look at me, +world...I can debunk your faith in God and leave you applauding my +perception and intelligence to bring forth the truth." Sorry, I've already +forgotten your name, but the name of God will stand forever. +% +I am pleased to announce that, in addition to having spotless tiles and +grout in my bathroom, my hands are several orders of magnitude cleaner than +yours. My fingernails all but sparkle in the daylight, due to their highly +polished status. Upon examination under a scanning electron microscope, you +will notice that the crevices of my hands are quite literally free of germs +or other bacterial growths. Your hands, in comparison, are a veritable +wasteland of urine, dust mites, blood mixed feces, skin cells, and pet +dander. Your hygiene cannot even begin to compare to mine. Good day. +% +A military-grade GPS transponder is integrated into my brilliant blue HUD +which is projected stereoscopically onto the inside of my windshield giving +the effect of a gentle, and indeed quite entrancing, box of luminous +information about my own decadence floating 10-15 meters in front of my +exquisite sedan. Good day. +% +Overweight, rubber-faced men lurking near commercial business centers or +shopping mall food courts during the morning hours? Stay away from these +people, they could be hamburglars. +% +People totally underestimate children's sexuality. Did you know even babies +can get erections? +% +That 'I work my ass off' shit is so 90's. Here in the 0's robots do our +work, Cletus. Get the fuck back to Amish country with that work ethic shit. +% +My blog is utterly inundated with trackbacks from across the globe. Past +commenters on my posts include U2 frontman Bono, His Majesty King Mohammed +IV of Morocco, and former UN Secretary-General Boutros-Boutros Ghali. I've +written over three thousand mind-stimulating and thought provoking entries +dating back to 1995, and I've received over ten million comments, all from +unique ip ranges.There has never been a single spam comment post that lasted +more than 0.25 seconds due to superior spam detection software which I have +written myself and ported to several popular blogging packages. You cannot +even begin to compare to me. +% +Sorry to burst your musical bubble, but the bands you listen to were +overwhelmingly influenced by the bands I listened to four years ago. Try to +keep up. +% +My musical interests are so vast i cannot even begin to explain them using a +keyboard. Go back to reading Pitchfork everyday trying to find the song that +describes your life to a T; it won't be hard I'm sure. +% +Excuse me, but that troll you just pasted is over ten years old; i've +perused my logs and found myself referencing said troll over two hundred +times. Thank you. +% +You see that crystal salt cellar in my Amazon wish-list? That will set you +back $27,000 at Hammacher-Schlemmer. Incidentally, I own four. Go back to +your Livejournal and post about ordering twenty five cent Chinese Food +takeout with your drunken frat friends; you're quite out of your element +here. +% +My digital music library is vast and unrivaled, consisting of only the most +pristine lossless audio files ripped from the original DAT/DDS recordings +(with pre-mixdown and pre-master sister copies, of course). My inside +sources supply me with copies of the newest albums before even the artists +themselves have heard the final cuts. Incidentally, you've never heard of +99% of these bands, nor could you ever hope to comprehend their genius nor +appreciate their obscurity. +% +Guys that are uncircumcised are repulsive to me. People go in and out of +public washrooms so fast you know they didn't wash their hands with soap. +Can only imagine how much stinky smeg must be down there. There was one guy +I was with that was uncut. He was only four inches and that didnt last. The +first to say it doesnt matter are small men. Its brilliant luck the guys +I've been with have been 8-10 inches so far. Uncut is such an aversion, it +makes me want to ask right away to weed them out. +% +i tried to commit suicide so i took a bunch of pills but i was upset when +the pills i thought said "die" actually said "diet" :(( i lost 5lbs tho :))) +% +I use the latest versions of Adobe Photoshop as soon as they are released. I +have 5 versions of Macromedia Flash installed on my computer. My computer +syncs with many 'blogs' to find out the latest release information on new +products that I immediately download from a p2p (Peer To Peer) server which +I have exclusive access to. I am a website designer; I also do myspace +website designs with skillful grace. I listen to a lot of indie music but I +was the original indie fan before it sold out and got popular. I also like +emo (emotional) music. I went on a drug binge when I was 16 and lost my +virginity to a truck driver behind a Pak'n'Save. Brb, I gotta cut myself. Do +you want to see my blog? PS. How do I make those clouds? +% +You know what pushes my buttons? You know what makes my bubbles pop? You +know what raises the hairs on my ass? You know what tickles my fancy? You +know what thaws my ice cubes? You know what gets my cripples standing? You +know what formats my hard drive? You know what drains my fluids? You know +what ticks my clock? You know what shoots my target? You know what +neutralizes my pathogenic agents? You know how much I paid to get you into +college? You little shit. +% +Gentlemen, I am pleased to announce that in addition to having leech access +to the most elite 0-day courier FTPs, I have thousands of shell accounts, +each of which are capable of running an unlimited number of processes with +eggdrop/IRC support. My botnet is unfathomably large. +I have access to hundreds witty IRC vhosts, using every existing TLD. I +connect to them using an unreleased version of mIRC with every feature you +could possibly desire, including the most powerful WARTOOLS. This is all +powered by my $5,000 premium Dell computer system. You cannot even begin to +compare to me. +% +THE PURPOSE OF LANGUAGE IS COMMUNICATION AND IF YOU CAN UNDERSTAND IT +DESPITE SPELLING/GRAMMAR FLAWS AND YOU ARE ABLE TO CORRECT IT THEN SAID +COMMUNICATION WAS EFFECTIVE AND YOU ARE A FAGGOT. +% +So I was having lunch with my good friend Jerry Bruckheimer at a local +restraunt, and we were discussing Top Gun. One thing that struck me about +Top Gun that I never really knew why Goose died. So Jerry, or Jerr-Bear as +he's known by his friends, let me in on a little secret. He told me that at +the time of Goose's death, he was chewing gum and that the excessive juice +that was being excreted from his chewing the gum caused him to lose control +and die. And this just wasn't any chewing gum, it was Bubblicious. And this +just wasn't any Bubblicious flavor, it was a flavor called Lebron James' +Loopy Lemonade gum. So if you see this flavor of gum at the stores, please +do not buy it because it killed Goose. +% +is it possible i could have bought a bootleg pci sata card? it says +siclicon image 3112 but its not working right and the bios has grammar +errors. wtf? +% +Anyone who says "F/OSS" is a tool. Free software hates Open Source because +Open Source is the little sell out movement that doesn't give a fuck about +the ideals. It's like True vs. Nu metal. Stop associating Free Software +even remotely with Open Source because those of us in the Free Software +movement probably hate you. +% +I scoff at your claim that your windows environment can even begin to +compare to mine. I have thousands upon thousands of fonts, and my wallpaper +is a massive 2GB at a whopping 14,000 dpi in glorious 128-bit color. My +onscreen text is antialiased with the latest ClearType technology, and +remains brilliantly legible even behind 10, nay, 20 transparent window +panes. Clicking my Start button triggers a fanfare and a choir of haunting +angelic voices as you stagger back in awe of my stunning 45,000 item Start +Menu. +% +This is discrimination! Just because I have a -job- I should have tax +dollars taken away from me and given to slovenly brutish underclass, who +refuse to work and instead attempt to mug me every time I pick up a male +prostitute downtown?? +% +one time i was in my friends bathroom taking a shit and i was reading a +maxim magazine that was by the toilet and saw some semi nude shots of some +model (i dont even remember who) and i had the sudden urge to masturbate. i +continued to do so and cleaned up and went out as if nothing happened. it +was exhilarating and i wanted to do it again. so i did. several times. i +even asked to use his shower so i could secretly masturbate in there. i like +doing this because it's a top secret that only i know, and i can laugh about +stuff and no one will ever know. i also like to masturbate on days in which +key events happened. 9/11 being my TOP yearly ritual. "never forget" about +christmas and thanksgiving. sometimes mark-paul gosselaar's birthday when i +can remember it. +% +Recently, as a reward for getting straight 'A's I took my son to a CompUSA +and told him he could have any computer he wanted. Imagine my disgust when +he selected a mac mini. It's as if I took him to a whorehouse for his first +lay and he wound up getting head from the bouncer. Where did I fail as a +father? +% +Pepsi generation refers to the generation of free radicals in your system +when you imbibe this caustic brew. Parents, if you have any regard for the +health of your children, do not allow them to drink this devil beverage +which promotes among other ills: skateboarding, loud music, drug (caffine) +use, disrespect to elders, race mixing and in general, the kind of eXtreme +living expressly forbid by the our lord and savior, Mohammed in the holy +Korang. (PBUH) +% +I was recently made the victim of an ICMP "flood". After hurricane Katrina, +it is inexcusable that this kind of thing should happen. It is now crystal +clear that Bush doesn't care much about net people. +% +I'D LOVE TO BE THE ONLY FEMALE AT A "SUPER-BOWL" PARTY MADE UP OF 4-6 MEN! +THE MEN TALK ME INTO MAKING A FRIENDLY WAGER ON THE 1/2 TIME SCORE. IF THE +FELLAS TEAM IS LOSING AT 1/2 TIME...I GET $1000.00...IF THE TEAM THEY CHOSE +IS WINNING...THEY ALL GET "ME" TO DO AS THEY PLEASE!!! +% +The government today announced that it is changing its emblem from an Eagle +to a CONDOM because it more accurately reflects the government's political +stance. A condom allows for inflation, halts production, destroys the next +generation, protects a bunch of pricks, and gives you a sense of security +while you're actually being screwed. +% +Linux was never "free" in either sense of the word. You may have had +downloaded Linux onto your computer for free but someone paid for it. In my +case, does anyone know how I can trade child porn with other Linux +enthusiasts. Hit me back. +% +I believe that racial profiling is another necessary evil. Its existence is +the fault of the G-Unit, a popular "hip-hop" artist, whose name is clearly +the subliminal message "GUN IT". He is reinforcing the concept in the noble +white mind that rappers today are the tool of satan, coaxing the young and +uneducated nigger into a life of violence by instructing him to deal with +his problems using firearms. +% +Linux is an OS where files have no association to programs; all +configuration and settings are stored "wherever" in text files that grow to +be megabytes long; most shell commands are so abstractly named that you +would never be able to use them without knowing how they work.. or first +reading its "manual page". +Linux is an operating system of inconsistancy. Theres over a thousand +distributions of linux, and over a billion different modified versions of +it. Programs come shipped as source code that you must compile and configure +(by way of large scripts that attempt to figure out how your system is +running.. since nothing is standard). +% +Linux is a form of mental sickness; a security blanket left over from the +childhood of the Computer Age. The sooner "Tux" and his travelling freak +show pack it up and move on, the better. +% +Any east slim/lean chinese nsf/nsreg/sec/jc/scouts/npcc/ncc uniform boys +intrested roleplay kidnapping/tying up fun in full uniform attire? 23 chn +male 171 100 fat guy here in Bedok North. Pls mesg me if intrested, thanks. +% +Surprisingly, my healthy pussy emanates a fragrance EXACTLY like steaming +hot french fries from McDonald's. Days when the smell is particularly +strong, it makes me long for a large Dr Pepper with plenty of ice. And it +makes my stomach growl, particularly in the mornings. +% +girl, you must be a basic land card, because i just tapped you and now i got +mana burn +% +I just got back from my trip to Africa and man was it great! First we landed +in South Africa and while there I actually got to meet Nelson Mandela. He +was a very gracious and interesting host. +Then we were on to Kenya. While there I got to see lions and elephants in +the wild. A rhino actually chased the hummer we were riding in, but I think +the driver prompted it to. I also saw a few giraffes and crocs. Then we went +up to Nigeria and saw the different cultures of people that were there. I +actually got to visit and internet cafe and check my emails! Then we got a +guided tour down the Niger River. Man that was the funnest part of the +entire tour. I saw several large snakes hanging from trees and lots of +crocodiles. Then we saw a gang of Ubangi-Lips rape a 6 year old girl and eat +her father afterwards. It was awesome. +% +one time i tried to stick an egg back into a chicken, i think it gave the +chicken an orgasm because all this liquid came out all over my hands and the +chicken started to squawk and flap its wings. maybe im weird but this was a +major turn-on! +% +I need pictures of your fingernails for a research project I am doing for +Columbia University. Preferably extreme closeup of your cuticles. If you +could cut them slightly open with a razor blade, just so a little blood +leaks onto them.. that would be awesome. +% +girl, you must be gasoline because even though you're pricey, I'm still +going to pump you in my van +% +Whoa! If flames were an alternative power source, this would be a nuclear +reactor. Very good trolling, sir! I laud your recent accomplishments and +expect to read of your exploits in the latest trolling journals. +% +girl you must be Six Flag's newest roller coaster because some rednecks told +me that they have been saving up their money all summer to ride you +% +girl you must be a black market organ harvester cause you just stole my heart +% +girl you must be Doom 3 cause when the action starts the lights go out +% +girl you must be open source because the entire fucking high school class +has seen your internal workings and tinkered with them +% +Your "guess" is completely wrong. Just because animals can't talk doesn't +mean they can't give consent. Animals have teeth, claws and can give audible +warnings (growling, hissing, etc.) to voice their opposition to a sex act +being performed on them. + Also, many animals are quite intelligent and have a much faster +neurodevelopmental rate than humans, reaching mental adulthood at extremely +young ages by human standards. Finally, many animals are fully grown at much +younger ages than humans, so they're physically prepared for sex at younger +ages. + Comparing animals to children is absolutely ridiculous, and in some ways +even insulting to animals. Please do your homework before adopting a stance +on an issue you got from a blatantly-conservative source. +% +I hate this hypocritical bullshit. So I can can take a cow, shoot it in the +face, cut out its tongue, gut it, cut it into million cubes and eat them, +then wear it's skin...but I can't love one? I can't make one feel special? I +can't physically express all the love I have for it? Fuck America. +% +I prefer to open the conversation with light banter about my wardrobe and +jewelry, then I like to discuss my collection of expensive cars. This is +more than enough to convince you to have sexual intercourse with me. +% +Go back to jacking off to your anime girls. Leave the real women to real men. +% +There's something hypocritical about a country that fails to establish +adequate limits to medical testing on animals and adequate guidelines for +treatment of fur and meat animals yet makes the sale of all crush videos +(including those depicting the extermination of bugs, worms and rats) +illegal. +% +girl you must be herpes because every time I think i'm rid of you, there you +are on my dick +% +girl you must be ghonorrea because you're totally eating my nuts +% +Y'ALL HURD ABOUT DA HEERRIKANE? YO KATRINA WAS CAUZED BY WMDs YA HEARD? +DAS RITE YO. WEAPONS OF METEORLOGICAL DESTRUCTION. DA INSURGENTS ND DA +TALIBAN R BEHIND ALL DIS. ND FEMA IS RACIZICALIST TOO. BUSH DON'T CARE +ABOUT BLACK PEEPLE. +% +No, actually, I am not fat. I have about a 10% bodyfat, actually. I lift +weights all the time that I am not playing video gamez (ps2 sucks). +% +Thank you for giving me a glimpse into the wonderfully vivid and imaginative +world that you occupy. I feel...honored...to say the least. Words can not +express my gratitude that you would grant upon us put a peephole into the +glorious universe that you are so priviledged to occupy from 9-5 every +single weekday. I am envious but I know it is because God has favored you +above me...you are TRULY worthy. +% +I love both dog cock and Negro cock, but that is hardly any reason to make +either dogs or Negroes American citizens. Just as there will be ways to +enjoy Chinese food without flooding America with Chinese asylum-seekers, +there will be ways for you to enjoy Negro cock without allowing large +numbers of Negroes to roam about destroying American infrastructures. +% +one time this guy showed me his 'drug free' tattoo so one day me and my +buddies pinned this guy down and injected him with heroin. he was kicking +and screaming and we all laughed and the next day we found out he killed +himself LOL +% +Fuck them boo boos I guess some of those jack asses should have cashed their +welfare check and gotten some swimming lessons instead of blowing it on +hennessy, spinning rims, and crack! +% +The cowardly, girly-men faggot Muslim and Arab subhumans are quite another +matter. Islamists do not accept the United States as it is, and actively +want to change it into a majority Muslim country where the Quran replaces +the Constitution. The lib-dems run "PC interference" for America-haters, +obscuring the true details and the important dialogue on all issues. We love +"diversity" and "multi-culturism", don +% +Last weekend I slept over at a friend's house, but forgot to bring an extra +pair of underwear. He offered to let me borrow a pair of his. Well, we went +for a long car ride, and long story short...I shit in his underwear. Not a +lot, but whoever did the laundry would definitely notice. When we got home, +I pulled him aside and told him about it. "Pull down your pants. I want to +see the damage," he replied. I was somewhat taken aback by this response. It +was his underwear after all, so I obliged. I pulled down my pants, and then +carefully lowered my underwear. I was surprised by how much shit there +really was. There were streaks all over my legs from when I had pulled the +shorts down, and my penis was covered in shit. How had it even gotten that +far?"Jesus," he exclaimed. "That's a lot of shit." Then he got down on his +knees and licked the underwear clean. When he was done with that, he slurped +the shit off my cock and balls. What a day! +% +How on earth do i open taorent files? when i try openoing with winzip or win +rar it tells me teh file is damaged ?? +% +jesus I spent the formative years of my childhood masturbating to a shemale +sprite +% +My hole day in skateboarding is just wake up when ever you feel like it eat +then go meet a few friends skate chill skate get something to eat then skate +chill run from the pigs and skate then go to sleep about 4 or 5 in the +morning. +% +Jeff's balls are about 3 inches in diameter. They are green and hairy. When +in public, Jeff will often expose his balls as a way of calming a crowd. +Often in a fit of anger Jeff will whip one of his balls at someone who is +misbehaving. Most people prefer not to come in contact with Jeff's balls. +% +It is indeed a cruel twist of nature that the most wonderful sex coupling in +the world ?is illegal - made so by puritanical Adults determined to limit +child rights. +% +im a computer geek?? im not the one who spends his time on multiple forums, +im not the one who comes here day and night for almost every day of the week +and talks about making fun of people on the internet. christ, get a life +% +As someone erotically attracted to balloons, a question close to my heart +is "to pop or not to pop?" Flame wars over this very issue take up a +significant amount of space on the balloon fetish chatrooms I frequent. I +find that while non-poppers feel an emotional attachment to balloons and can +get quite protective of their inflatable friends; poppers such as myself see +no point to jerking off with balloons unless they explode. Your thoughts? +% +When the female of a species is more promiscuous, the male has to work +harder to keep his woman, and thus reproduce. It is easier for him to keep +her entertained if he has a more impressive dick, which means that the +better endowed male can reproduce more than another male who is not so well +endowed. In a species where the women are more loyal, this isn't so +necessary. So if the coons have the biggest penises, all that tells you is +that the blacks have humanity's most slutty women. I'm prepared to believe +that that is true. +% +Wow you're life is so complete. Havning to use a drug to have fun and +listening to sucky music must make you so cool. Partying with women who have +been passed around more times then your mom must make you a pimp. +% +if you want people to think you know what you are talking about, just put +".com" at the end of everything you say.com +% +so i get home from work, ready to cook some chicken things in the microwave +(oven is broke), i read the instructions to see about how long to put them +in for.. the damn instructions say, for microwave cooking, to put them in +the microwave for 3 minutes AND THEN put them in a oven for 15. hey +stouffers you lame retarded fucks, if i had a god damn oven i would use the +shit to begin with. it's called microwave cooking for a reason. THANK YOU +COME AGAIN +% +At first, the idea sounded unthinkable. Use my hand to wipe my ass? +Disgusting! But after 10 minutes of waiting, I decided that it was my only +option. I slowly lowered my right hand under my butt and scooped all the +fecal matter from my bottom. Not only did it feel gross, but now I had a +whole new set of problems. One simply does not walk out of a bathroom stall +in a public restroom with one hand covered in shit. I sat there petrified, +hoping for a miracle. But no miracles came. I was alone. Or so I thought. A +knock on the stall door sprang me into action. "One second," I called out, +and in one quick movement I shoved the defacation into my mouth. When I tell +this story, what most people find most surprising was that I didn't gag +immediately. In fact, the stuff tasted rather good. Scratch that...it was +orgasmic. And the texture - there is nothing like it. After swishing the +poop cusisine around my mouth for a few moments, I gulped it down. Up until +that moment, I hadn't realized how hungry I was. Suddenly, I wanted more, +and fast! With my pants still at my ankles, I threw open the stall door and +grabbed the elderly gentleman who had been patiently waiting. "Give me all +your shit, and make it fast." By the end of that glorious day, I had tasted +the shit of more than 100 men, and a few women too. +% +As I was reading that, my cat rubbed against my leg, and it surprised me. +But it felt kind of good, so I let her continue. After about five minutes of +this, I was feeling pretty horny, and from her erect nipples, I could tell +my cat was too. I picked her up and put her in my lap. She purred as I +unzipped my pants, revealing my enormous boner. Then, without warning, she +bit the head of my penis with her sharp fangs. Blood was everywhere, and i +stared in horror as she began to claw at my blood-spattered testicles. I +grabbed a pair of scissors and snipped off her tail. She meowed loudly and +scurried away. I guess we were not ready to take our relationship to the +next level. +% +Is it not weirder to drink cow's milk which is truly intended for baby cows? +The answer: Hell no! The only thing weirder than me drinking breast milk, is +the fact that milk is coming out of my wife's chest in the first place. It +sure as hell didn't do that when I met her. I'm telling you, the whole thing +is lunacy. I love my wife, but does she really have to be such a mammal? +% +Some say that I am the king of trolls. Of course, this is ridiculous because +trolls have no king and accept no authority. +% +Don�t let anybody ever tell you that Japan is just another foreign country. +It is much more than that. My story begins in the summer of 1983. I was an +expert negotiator, and that was what brought me to an exclusive resort +outside of Tokyo. Two large Japanese electronics companies were attempting a +merger of some sorts. After two fruitless days of negotiations, I figured +out a way to make everybody happy. I made some phone calls, and pretty soon +all the executives were standing in the conference room, glaring angrily at +me. �Gentlemen, may I present, Ling.� A buxom young Japanese schoolgirl +entered the room. What she lacked in age, she made up for in sex appeal. The +room went silent. I was terrified. Had I made a mistake? Suddenly, the +executives all burst out laughing. Then, one by one, each executive removed +his pants and began furiously masturbating over the young female, while I +stood watching. Even now, as I write this, I am getting an erection, +thinking about all those precious little penises waving wildly about. +Finally, after the last load had erupted onto the face of the girl, whose +slanted eyes were almost completely covered in goo, I walked up to her and +lapped up every last drop of milky goodness. Oh, how I love Japan. +% +Every time somebody starts hating on the president, it really bothers me. +Don�t get me wrong, I hate the current administration as much as the next +politically minded citizen, but it�s really self-defeating. You see, the +president is not really who you think he is. He�s not the guy who makes +these decisions that piss you off. He looks like he makes the decisions. He +sounds like he is making the decisions. In reality, he�s just the guy that +has to sell them to you. He is an actor, pretending to care about the +country. He probably even believes he is actually the president. That�s one +of the reasons why people like him at all. Another reason is that he sucks a +lot of dick. And when I say a lot, I am not kidding. Like, we�re talking +millions of big, wet, floppy cocks getting shoved in his mouth over the past +month alone. +% +Let me get this straight: the oil companies pressure the U.S. government +into invading Iraq, and then they expect us to be grateful when they donate +a measly $4k to the hurricane relief effort? An effort, by the way, that has +been severely hampered by the fact that most members of the national guard +are currently halfway across the world. There's no way for them to come back +to help out, and even if they could, those guys are exhausted. One of my +buddies from high school joined the national guard and ended up in Iraq, of +all places. He told me that between the constant bombings, the desert heat, +the buttfucking, the cumguzzling, the gangbanging, and the surprise +circumcisions, there is hardly any time to sleep. +% +last night i had this dream that i was going to the bathroom, like pissing +in a full size urinal (all the way from the ground up, like 4 feet high), +when all of a sudden i look to my right and there is this old lady standing +next to me doing like the fake pissing thing, holding nothing, and staring +at my wang, which is now hard. all of a sudden she jumps into my urinal, +note i am still pissing, and shoves my cock into her mouth and starts giving +me head. don't forget i am still pissing. so she's goin down on me like +she hasn't had cock in 40 years, which she probably hasn't and i finish +pissing all over her, so i reach over and flush and just leave. she sits +there in the urinal as i leave and there is this indian couple, the wife is +pregnant, who is just coming into the bathroom wondering what the hell i am +doing. i wave and smile and say hello, at which point i casually walk out +of the bathroom. when i get out of the bathroom my company is having a +meeting so i sit down and all of a sudden this retarded guy who works here +starts beating me up, at which point i wake up. +% +I often find myself contemplating what it would be like if an elephant threw +up but its mouth was closed. Would it throw up out its trunk? And if so, +that leads me to my next question: Would it make that elephant noise when +the throw-up comes out? I have played this scenario in my head every day and +night for the last ten years and the more I think about it the more firmly +convinced am I that the answer to both questions is in the positive. Discuss. +% +I'd love to have a man as my girlfriend and who would greet me each morning +in a new an refreshing way. A spray of hot piss, a dick up the ass, an ass +pressed against my face, farts in my face, all the while waking up to a +beautiful man on some dim morning sunrise, light shining through the +curtains onto his perfectly formed pectorals and the silk sheets layed upon +his body reveleaing enough of his penis to make me realise how lucky and how +wonderful i am. I prefer men and I date exclusively black men. +% +The first thing you need to understand is that the government does not +represent the people. It represents the corporations. The second thing you +need to understand is that hurricane Katrina is not a natural disaster. It +was a product, paid for by the U.S. government, and created by a +Chinese-built weather device. Think about it: who benefits from a natural +disaster like this? First and foremost, construction companies. New Orleans +needs to be completely rebuilt. Second, the government. Every moment of +airtime that the president gets to talk about saving lives rather than the +war in Iraq means another vote in the next election. Lastly, mankind +benefitted a little from all those niggers drowning. +% +The existence of "foreigners" is a common liberal myth. The self-styled +intellectual elite, attempting to push their own petty agendas on the rest +of us, invented the idea of "foreigners" to lay a guilt trip on the rest of +the country. + +FACT: Nothing exists outside the US! There is only vast ocean, we occupy the +entirety of Pangea. (The existence of multiple continents is yet another +liberal myth, which we'll discuss next time). + +FACT: Although the "foreigners" lie was created and popularized by liberals, +it has recently been picked up by conservatives. The Bush administration +relies heavily on scare tactics involving hostile "foreigners" as a way of +grabbing unconstitutional levels of power. + +FACT: You may meet people in daily life who claim to be "foreigners" and +illegal "immigrants". These people are merely telling you that false story +because they're trying to get out of paying taxes. + +FACT: "Foreign" languages are simply elaborate codes used by spies to talk +in secret. These spies are everywhere, and they are determined to steal your +genes for use in horrible cloning experiments. Don't trust anyone who speaks +a "foreign" language! + +FACT: The word "foreign" comes from the combination of "for" and "reign". +The word was invented for reign-for perpetuating the reign of dishonest +liberals and unconstitutional governments. Don't let them fool you! +% +There is no reasonable expectation of privacy in the world because there +never was one to begin with. You can't lose something you never had. + We live in a web of interconnecting lives. Our actions have +long-reaching effects on others, as theirs do on ours. The idea that a +single man may live as a hermit in the midst of the civilized world is both +absurd and problematic for being such a popular idea. + Privacy doctrine in this country has existed for one purpose: shielding +domestic violence from public scrutiny. The whole +private-sphere/public-sphere distinction arose so that some men could +prevent other men from interfering in what they manage to pull off behind +closed doors. Marital rape and worse violences have always been justified as +located in the mystical private sphere. + As you cling to the arbitrary notion of privacy, you're doing little +more than empowering men to rape and torture women. + It's time we got rid of the private/public distinction. No one ever had +any actual privacy; merely artificially imposed curtains that conceal +malicious actions by some against others. If this does anything to undermine +public respect for such a morally bankrupt institution as privacy, then I'm +all for it. +% +Gimp is perfectly usable. I know. I use it to add a mosaic over the faces of +my many preteen rape victims. +% +you don't understand,you don't realise that the internet is a form of +communicating and it's just as serious as talking in person or on a phone. +Stop with the bullshit. +% +I've been in the feceshape hobby for a good three years now. There's just +something about being able to manipulate the shape of my poop by squeezing +my bowels that appeals to me. Plus, when I'm 80 I'll have such control +there'll be no need to worry about messing myself. +% +Nigerians make me so mad I wish someone would round them all up and send +them to a country where people starve and get gunned down in the street +% +My son has always been a fan of Captain Planet. He has every episode on VHS +and watches is roughly 12 hours a day. Recently I caught him licking Captain +Planet's wang on the television screen while massaging his penis with a +Captain Planet action figure. Is this normal? What should I do? +% +I am a substitute teacher for grades K-5 and I was awarded a gold star for +starting a movement in my school for "story holes" in which any student +could go into a bathroom and sit down and someone read them a story through +a hole in the bathroom wall. +% +I'm an Apple zealot, I'm typing this on a Mac Mini, and I'm going to be +clicking submit with my one mouse button. Eat your hearts out you gaggle of +pock-marked, basement-dwelling, subhuman F/OSS advocates. +% +whistle core is actually popular in japan it caught quite well and know +where seeing various new whistle core bands come out of the country like the +blue mist dogs, fire in the attic, lazor beem, robo boy vs the laviathan and +various others its just a matter of time till they hit the charts here +% +Dude you have to own one first to understand, people that hate them haven't +owned them. I owned two and flipped them both, luxury eddie bauers one had +20s on it and a TV inside with a ps2 man, flipped them both nearly killed +me...But I still fucking love suvs +% +BLACK MOE YOU FILTHY SILVER TOOTHED SUBHUMAN NIGGER SCUM-TELL YOUR CUM +SUCKING 550LB MOM TO CLEAN THE HORSE CUM OFF HER SCABBY MOUTH OR I WONT SHIT +DOWN HER CUM SLURPING THROAT-THEN WHEN SHE BLOWS YOU-YOU CANTASTE MY SHIT +% +I have two fetishes that sort of scare me. No it's not dog sex or +pedophilia. First is facesitting. I want a girl to sit on my face, +preferably while mostly clothed or something because an asshole that close +to my nose would probably make me vomit. Secondly is something called WAM. +It's girls getting hit with pies or having chocolate pudding poured on them +or rolling around in creamed corn. Anything Wet And Messy, thus the name +WAM. I'm pretty sure it comes from watching You Can't Do That On Television +as a kid. I was shocked to find out that there was actually a pretty big +internet community devoted to it where I can find grown women getting slimed. +% +"Shh," Snape said, their mouths very close. He lifted his hand off Harry's +erection and smoothed it over his cheek. It was a breathless sort of moment, +in a series of moments. Harry looked at Snape's face, enjoying the sensual +transformation. Features normally so severe softened by desire, flushed, +glistening. Harry didn't have time to wonder what Snape saw in his own face, +for Snape was kissing him again. +% +Remember when morgan freeman played that high school principal with the bat +and he caught the kids singing in the bathroom and he made them sing the +school song and the fat kid was a crack smoker. when he called all the +trouble makers up to the stage during that assembly and they are all raising +hell and shit and there is one white kid on the stage, well that white kid +turned out to be none other than new jersey�s own recovering addict of the +mafia in the Sopranos: Chris Moltesante. +% +I have always fantasized about being a doll. like one of those real dolls, +only my owner doesn't know I'm in there. They think I'm just a doll, when +really I am enjoying everything that is bring done to me. Having no control +of my body, being dominated completely, and then being put away when I'm not +being used. However, I know that this is not possible in the real world, +which saddens me. I however I'm sure there is someone out there that would +gladly own me and treat me like their doll. Change my outfits daily, use my +for their own sexual desires. and then when their not using me, keep me in a +locked box in the closet, sometimes for days at a time. Only to be taken out +when my owner wanted to use me some more. +% +The strangest blow job I ever experienced was when I went to visit Shaq and +friends in the locker room when he was still playing for LA. They held me +down while Kobe held my mouth open and Shaq rammed his elephant trunk man +hammer into my mouth. I immediately started gagging and throwing up but the +meat missle was so big it held the barf back and it went into my stomach +instead. Then they took me into the shower and proceeded to turn me into +the team pin cushion, it was like I was a tapestry in a sewing maching I got +skewered for hours and I loved it. They finished off my visit with Shaq +punching me in the throat and taking a huge dump on my forehead and making +me lick his balls while he decorated my skull. It was great. I love black +cock, I can't get enough its like catnip. +% +Fly catching is a hobby of mine. Whenever I successfully catch a fly, I go +into the bathroom and I fill the bathtub up with warm water till it's deep +enough that only the head of my penis sticks out of the water. Next, I rip +the wings off of the fly and place the fly upon the tip of my Cock--the +penis "head". Not having anywhere to go, the cute lil fly runs around upon +the tip of my Cock, creating a most arousing sensation.Try it yourself !! +% +I heard this story from an M.D. in Japan. It was during WWII. A bunch of +Japanese soldiers had rounded up 3 or 4 Korean women. They proceeded to fuck +them in every orifice, but there weren't really enough to go around. So one +of the soldiers bayonets one of the girls in the stomach so that he can have +a place to fuck too. The feeling was so great that the others all start +taking turns in her stomach too. +% +no not really i just see them as mentally ill ..something thats encoded in +their brains to love the opposite sex is backwards..and their phormones are +fucked also..i hope science can find out a way to fix it....not because i +dont like gays but because if u see a kid throw a baseball the wrong way +dont u wanna help them throw it properly? +% +Before my last job interview, my hair was really messy, so I went into a +washroom to tidy it up. But the plumbing wasn't working right, so I couldn't +get water out of the taps. My only solution was to urinate in my hands and +use that to do my hair. I got the job. +% +You don't think Bill will include the multiple tab feature in IE with +Longhorn's release? Hopefully when that happens it'll shut you Fire-fags up. +% +girl you must be harry potter because my dick is slytherin +% +Did you know that us niggers werer the first people on this planet and that +every race in the world evolved from us we were the first developed primates +and there were and still are great black minds like Plato, +Shakespeare,Socrates,W.E.B dubois,Fredric Douglas........ you fail to +realize we created you and we can take you away just as easily,we once ruled +this world and this world shall return to its original owners like it was +before you devils came along and fukced it up . We had great civilazations +in Africa such as Timbuktu,Kush,Egypt,Nubia, ek cetera who taught Mathmatics +and liturature to the greeks,Arabs,Romas,s and of course caucs after we +civilized the world they turned around a stabed us in the back and clamed it +there selves and take credit for what we started and every time a nigger +moves up in high ranking yall get scared coz you know what we are capible of +doing but our day is coming soon when that black man you know as jesus comes +back you"ll see. oh yeah Hitler was a Fa9et and part jewish crackers!!!!!!If +you white you aint right. black pride world wide +% +What did the recycling bin say to the garbage can? "YOU'RE A PILE OF FAGGOT +TRASH!" , because the garbage was filled with gay porn mags. To which the +garbage can replied, " You are a bucket of thoroughly-washed juice and milk +containers, populated by an eco-friendly mid-20's socialist/liberal +democratic couple who no one will ever listen to" +% +I have been blessed and cursed with two hot ass cousins. Damn what I +wouldn't give to hit it. But I never will be able to without consequences. I +remember one time when she was 8 she wanted me to sleep in her bed with her +and we were going to touch each other. But I still believe in that God +fairytale so I turned it down. I still regret it. +% +there is a gay guy in my office, and he referred to hemmrhoids as speedbumps +% +For the record, If a guy wants to rape you by combining something with +Roofies, He's going to use something much more efficent than horse +tranquiler or whatever you think us frat boys are using these days, a good +rapist is going to use something along the lines of a brick. A simple slab +of concrete is actually the most dangerous killer in the sex crime kingdom, +one shot to the face with a brick and you will be ugly for life, and those +effects AREN'T TEMPORARY. You will also not be able to have children for +life, because they will be so afraid of their brickface of a mother that +they will cower in the womb forever. If you're worried about Progesterex +breaking out soon on campus's everywhere you should be even more worried +about being hit in the face by a brick while sitting in your neighborhood +bar, because unlike Progesterex, bricks are already here....BEWARE!!!! +% +whatever... come talk to me when -your- site wins a Webby +% +Go back to listening to your "Rich Dad, Poor Dad" book-on-tape in your 1989 +Honda Accord on your 25 minute commute to your dead end job. +% +So, I just got a job at Starbucks. It's part of my plan for global +domination. I'm going to tear the system down from the inside. +% +TIP FOR IRCERS #51: Bathe often, as personal odors are offensive to others +% +Actually, it is incorrect to call me a 'know-it-all' because God is the only +one that knows everything. +% +The case against marijuana legalization:Marijuana is not dissimilar to other +drugs, except in that its users seem to be rather slow witted after heavy +and extended use. You know the type. Tobacco and alcohol have their +disadvantages too though, so really marijuana is not too different. Except +that for some reason, marijuana users have been unable to make a convincing +case in favour of marijuana. They haven't won the argument at all, and their +lack of success can only be explained by the negative effects of marijuana +on their ability to put forward convincing and sophisticated arguments with +the charisma and social nous required to carry the day. This leads me to +think that marijuana is perhaps not as innocent as its advocates claim. If +it was it would be legal, wouldn't it? But the bumbling ineptitude and +stupidity of the typical stoner campaigner is a damning indictment of the +negative effects of marijuana. +% +You are either for the expansion of growth of the human population off the +earth and into space or you are for mass murder and restricted personal +liberty to control population growth here on earth. +% +Are you wealthy? I'm just curious if this influences your thinking. Is +your household income above the median of $51,000/year, or closer to the +90th percentile of household income of just under $125,000/year? +% +I was staying in this guy's apartment and I heard people having sex above +me. The moaning turned me on so I whipped my tool out and whacked it. Later +I found out the girl upstairs was being raped. I masturbated to a girl being +raped. How sad is that? Should I feel guilty? Who knows. It's not like I +knowingly did anything wrong. +% +Y'know, I may be a lame furry faggot but I bet you I can do stuff you guys +can't do. I'd like to see any of you guys make it as a professional poker +player :) +% +I started using Linux as a total n00b. I've done nothing but fixing, +adjusting, fixing, updating, trying, fixing, and oh, ... fixing - AND I LOVE +IT!!! +% +you have to be on malt liquor to fully appreciate it. To the average +american negro, slightly buzzed on malt liquor and dazed by the media +stimulus of sports and bigscreen TV.. The phone, and the ability to +communicate, even in the typical monosyllables of the subculture, is a +complete novelty. Thus, the "wazzup" commercial represents the wonder and +happiness that a group of young negroes finds in using the technology +% +GET ME TWO HORSES WITH THE BIGGEST FUCKING DICKS YOU CAN FIND, AND THEM IM +GONNA SUCK OFF ONE, WHILE JACKING OFF THE OTHER, AND IM NOT GONNA STOP TILL +IM BATHING IN BUCKETS OF CUM +% +the only solution is to go up there with your katana and show them who wears +the kimono in your dojo +% +My uncle works for Capcom and he let me play Street Fighter 4: The +Wreckoning and it has Sheng Long in it and he can do Guile's Handcuffs and +his wife is Blanka's birthmother and you can do uppercuts in the AIR (also +Breakfastalities) +% +RIP klerck!! :-( +% +Stone Cold Steve Austin just took you in his arms and superslammed you in +your bed, then read you a bedtime story and turnbuckled you into the shower +the next morning while suplexing the milk into your Captain Crunch cereal +% +fuck ya dude, ya site sucks crap, you be dissin us clowns u gona git beat +DOWN, u fuckin wit da Juggalo NATION straight up ya hatah biatch u betta +xplain youself becuz u gotta a lotta clownz ready to beat ur azz +% +i dont like the way you try to act like you're too smart or you're above +everything and hatred makes you stupid... no it doesn't and ur not above +this. ignorant is nothing but a word.... fake ass mother f-ucker is a mood +that you portray. gay is an expression used by us nowadays doesn't mean +literally gay. i should smack you for not knowing that. and yes it does make +them gay +% +I've spent far too much time absorbing bullshit ideals from anarchists. The +truth of the matter is, I just don't want to pay for anything whatsoever. +Britney CDs should be free because I think that somehow the constitution +protects my illegal copying and distribution under some freedom of speech +law or fair use act. Even though I don't have to go out and buy luxury +items, I'm gonna whine and bitch anyway. +% +Oh u FUCkIn RaCISt BItCh Dont b TalkIn To mA Kuzin LIKE DAt. u FUCkIN +TRiFoLIn IrISh diCK SUCkER...~N~ 1st of all i dont Why u tALkIn ABOut pEopLe +WHen UR Azz Iz ugLy Azz FUCk..1st U NeeD 2 b CheckIn ur Self den Talk BOut +PeopLe..! Dont hate Juz BEcause oTha PEOple COuld Eat MOre Than u Can n not +get F-A-T .. n because people are Prettier dan U..! +% +hi, i recently read about sex with insects and fine it fasinated me.i went +to a pet store and bought crickets. taking them home i put some in a jar and +lowered it over my cock and balls. the sensation of them crawling all over +was overwhelming and i orgasmed quickly. is this normal??? +% +I was wondering if anyone knows of surgeries that can correct elongated +labia, or if there's anything you can do to make them look more normal. +They look disgusting to me. I'm not a chick or anything, I just really hate +this. My girlfriend's "axe wound", if you will, looks like a bloated sea +zombie. Thanks in advanced. +% +girl you must be real networks because i cannot get at your media without +installing this ridiculous software +% +What's up with black people and sandwiches? It seems like every time I see +some illiterate welfare monkey jiving his ass down the street, he is busy +cramming half of a submarine sandwich into his ape-maw. Is this some kind of +nigger code for the imminent helter-skelter racewar? +% +I KNOW I JUST GOT HERE BUT YOU ARE ALL JUST THE COOLEST PEOPLE IN THE WORLD +AND TOTALLY JUST LIKE ME!! WE SHOULD BE FRIENDS FOREVER AND THEN I GET OPS +% +Why fuss with KDE when you can buy an Apple? Why futz around with this? If +you want state of the art GUI, why not just buy a Mac? KDE may emerge as +great interface for your cell phone; but at the end of the day, it's just a +toy. Serious Unix developers are switching to Apple. +% +Of course you can get sick from eating poop. But you can get hurt and die in +an automobile wreck, too. Do you plan to avoid cars in the future? Of course +not. Knowledge of the consequences deters few cigarette smokers.You can not +catch any disease from the shit you eat that the donor did not have. My +"quality control" standards have served me well and I don't even know who +the donor was much less which diseases he had.Remember, not all shit is +created equally. Some shit really smells and tastes bad! More specifically, +a harsh acrid "smoky" odor and very bitter taste I consider bad. If it looks +bad or lacks the classic grogan appearance, I'd say lose it in a hurry. The +problem with being a bottom is that you can not be selective about the shit, +it comes prepackaged :-) Not always [usually not] the kind we'd like to +have. If you decide to proceed anyway, the most dire health consequence is +probably hepatitis, of course you can't get it unless he has it, in which +case you may get it from kissing, sucking, or rimming, etc.; so don't just +blame the shit. You can also pick up parasites and amoebae. If you get an +upset stomach, Tumms will usually help. I'm HIV negative, even after all +these years of eating shit from thousands of guys mostly anonymously, but I +have to admit that I have had to take Flagyl once or twice, and even now, I +clean myself out a couple times a year with Noroxin [one tab a day for 5 +days].If you have a problem and it lasts for more than five days or have +very severe symptoms: see a doctor and don't be bashful about telling him +what you did. It is wise to establish a good relationship with a physician +before you need one! You can avoid a lot of expensive diagnostics by just +suggesting he prescribe Noroxin or later if that doesn't work Flagyl.A final +thought here. Your toilet training and societal taboos are frequently +sufficient to cause you to worry or feel guilty after your first scat +experiences. This can cause you to conjure up psychosomatic illnesses +limited only by your imagination. Know yourself and be aware that this may +be a problem. +% +Need to be taken to dark side, expermented on, brought down to sub human +level. Have swallowed dog shit. Gotten into extreme pain. Had balls severly +abused and tortured. An y other sub humans out there need it as bad. Any +evil tops really into bringing a guy down? any other guys into blood? +% +girl u must be muslim cause im jihard as hell +% +Mathematically speaking, it would appear that you were a 2:1 favorite to +find the page you were looking for. Your click was questionable though given +the odds and the fact that any content on this site is likely to be crap +anyway. I wouldn\'t say that you.re a poor web surfer but I think it.s +highly unlikely that you could be a long term winner at higher stakes web +surfing. +% +go back to tabulating your ultimate apple dream machine on apple.com then +playing snes all night +% +Never clean up or shower here. The dried shit flakes off my body and +sometimes i'll brush a bit out of my beard. My head is shaved so it just +flakes off there too. Hell yes, I STINK. And my mouth smells like a sewer. +That's theway I like it! I may clear a few people out of a room when I walk +in but I haven't been thrown out of a Wallmart yet. +% +I shit into a tupper ware. I also like metal containers like the ones you +use for camping or in the military. then i freeze them or keep them in the +refrigerator for a few days. if you really seal the container tight, the +shit can be stored much longer. Have you ever tried to shove a frozen turd +up your ass? that is really hot, fuck yourself with your own turd. cool +% +I, too, prefer anyone I'm messaging to be literate and admit to a sneering +contempt for people who can't seem to break out of the "cute" Internet +misspellings and shortcuts. Children, grow up. +% +I got my 10 year old niece drunk and then penetrated her with a sharpie. I +later found out that the penetration had ruptured her vaginal walls, and her +mother accused my broher of being a child molestor as grounds for divorce. +He lost the case, and is now serving 20 years. +% +I'm not really gay, I just act that way to annoy/creep out people. +% +There is no god, because if there were, when my time of sorrow began, he +would have been there to help me. Why do I have an illness such as +depression, if supposedly god makes everyone that loves him happy? Fuck him +and his false offers. Fuck religion! +% +Greetings nerds. As you can clearly see, my Slashdot ID is far lower than +any of you can dream to have. Therefore all comments to this interesting +and controversial article will have to be replies to my comment. If you +fail to do this, I will search out your every post and mod them accordingly +with my vast amounts of accumulated mod points. You have been warned. Good +day. +% +BLOGGABLES ??? THE BLOGOSPHERE ??? BLOGOMATIC ??? SIMULBLOGCAST ??? ECOBLOGS +??? METABLOGS ??? BLOGS OF BLOGS ??? MEDIABLOGS ??? CATABLOG ??? UBERBLOG +??? BLOGSERVATION ??? RADIOBLOGS ??? BLOGSPIRATION ??? BLOGDEX ??? +BLOGDIGGER ??? BLOGLINES ??? BLOGPULSE ??? BLOGRUNNER ??? BLOGSNOW ??? +BLOGWISE ??? BLOGBRITY ??? BLOGS OF BLOGS TALKING ABOUT BLOGGING BLOGS ??? +% +woah! way to be sexist. i'm a girl hacker and exclusive linux user since +1998 and i'm certainly not alone +% +IMPORTANT NOTICE: anybody that has Windows XP 5.1 2600 release from +Devilsown, FCKGW-RHQQ2-YXRKT-8TG6W-2B7Q8 - GET OFF THE INTERNET NOW!!! +MICROSOFT IS ABOUT TO DO A SWEEP! +% +son, if you were a true music fan you would know that no good songs are 4/4 +go play with your fucking casio. +% +I got a 5+ on all 23 of my AP tests, a 2400 on the SAT, a 1337 on the ACT, +but it's not a big deal since I have a 270 IQ. I was drunk, high, and +getting a blowjob during every test, and I didn't study for any of them or +sleep in the prior weeks. +% +I dont even know what indie rock is, but it sure as fuck isnt going to get +you play with any of the girls I hang out with. +% +Okay, let's break it down, people.If you're a guy there is no such thing as +bisexual.There is only straight and gay.If you willingly touch a dick then +you are gay.If you willingly let a dick touch you then you are gay.If you +score anything other than zero on the Kinsey Scale: Gay.If you experimented +once when you were young and got married to a woman and had children and +lived a happy productive life forever after: Still gay.Yes, we know that you +don't like to be called gay but you chose the dick, now sleep with it."Bi" +is not different from gay it is just what homos call themselves.You can call +yourself a "striped bass" for all we care folks, you're still filthy faggots +and you're going to hell!!!! God isn't fooled. +% +Why must you trolls come to our forums and post stupid shit trying to rile +us up? Your posts don't even bother 99% of us, so just quit it. Any one +who agrees with me post the number "1" in this thread. +% +I am a node of server. Born of flesh and blood, but enhanced by the power of +its web. I have no use for pain or fear. My scripts are a focus of my will. +My strength is my knowledge. My weapons are my skills. Information is the +blood of my body. I am part of the greater network. I am host to the vast +data of server. My flesh is weak, but my connection is eternal; And +therefore, I am a god. +% +TO ALL THE BITCHEY 12 YEAR OLD SLIPCOCK FANS..PLEASE SHUT UP BEFORE YOU HURT +YOUR SELVES CRYING BLACK EYE SHADOW TEARS OF RAGE OVER MY +COMMENTS..OBVIOUSLY YOU NO IM CORRECT OTHERWSIE WHY WOULD YOU SHIT THAT MANY +TIMES IN YOUR PANTS OVER MY LONLEY COMMETNS!!YOU FUCK HEADS SHOULD SHUT UP +,QUIT SCHOOL(if you havent allready cause the kids dont ''get'' your +wigger,crack smoking nigger/jew fucking, garbage smelling italin ass) AND +GET A JOB AT THE CARWASH QUICK BEFORE SOME SPIC WITH A BETTER TASTE IN MUSIC +GETS THE JOB!!!I CAN JUST SEE IT NOW THE SLIPKNOT CONVICT IN HIS ORANGE +OVERALLS PICKING UP MY USED RUBBERS ON THE SIDE OF THE HIGHWAY LOL!!!!ONE +GROWN MAN CAN TAKE OUT 20+SLIPCOCK WORSHIPERS MOST OF THEM ARE GIRLS ANYWAYS +SO MAYBE THEYLL GET A NICE RAPE!!!AND THEN GET THROWN OFF A FUCKING BRIDGE +ONTO YOUR FAGGOT GHETTO SHIT HOLE OF AS HOUSE!!!I WILL MAKE SURE TO TAKE +PLENTY OF SHITS ON THE HIGHWAY AND LEAVE FILLED RUBBERS FOR YOU FAGS WHEN +YOU GET ON ''JUVEY''FOR ONE OF YOUR PETTY CRIMES!!!ENJOY YOUR FREEDUMB WHILE +IT LASTS YOU FUCKING NIGGERS!!!YOU WILL BE SITTING IN SOME JAIL SOON WRITING +TEAR FILLED LETTERS TO COREY TAYLOR OR YOUR GRANDMOTHER!!!HAHA ..IM OFFF TO +WATCH SOME FRESH PRINCE OF BELL AIR..YOU CUNTS IM SURE ARE OFF TO GET +''BLAZED''AND HAVE CRACK ADDICTED BABYS AT AGE 13 GOOD LUCK IN YOUR SHIT +HOLE LIVES NIGGERS!!! +% +fuck you sXe faggot ass niggers. yeah i said faggot and nigger i guess and +racist and a homophobe huh. yall are all fucking scenesters that probally +fucking stand on the out side of the pit with you little Xs on your hands +trying to be hXc but really your just stupid as shit. do we walk around with +fukcing Os on our hands if we do drugs. give it a break its all a fucking +trend arent you just so rad to claim edge i wish i was that cool oh well to +bad me and your mom did heroin last night together. so all in all i guess im +saying FUCK YOU TRENDY ASS PUSSY BITCHS. sXe is not cool dont claim it be it +you fucking anal cunt. +% +Hey guys, I'm protesting those starfield screen savers. Aren't screen savers +supposed to protect your monitor from getting the image burned on? What if +you permanently get stars flying on your monitor, that seems like it'd be +worse than something useful like your taxes. Morons. +% +Watermelon represents the ripe breasts of white women which the negro wishes +to rape, while the green color represents the money he wishes to steal. The +dark bands on the melon represent the bars of a jail cell, the negro's +ultimate destination. +% +Hello my name is Brad. I am gothic, and proper. I dress in all black all of +the time. I talk very intelligently by using large well articulated words. I +really don?t like Internet ?lingo? that much. I never understand what the +fuck it means, and really, ?l8ter?? Come on...LATER. Is it really that hard +to type? I do also wear makeup which includes eyeliner, eye shadow, +lipstick, etc, etc. +% +Girl you must be London because I want to explode inside your tunnel +% +out all day, in a series of events culminating in MY BAND'S FIRST +PERFORMANCE AT HAMILTON STREET... holy shit dude.. i am gunna be so nervus +lol. ever sense the two weeks wwe have been practicing in my stepdads +garage are band has ben waiting for this night and my entire 3rd period +Algebra class is totally coming i hope we score some pussy and some weed lol +lol fukkin kickass.... we are playin all of our originl stuff including song +titled "Party Party Party" in D minor, "The Song About The Girl Who Wouldn't +Dance With Me At Homecoming" (tentative title) in D minor, and "Beer Is Good +Girls Are Gay" in hmmm in hmm well lol ok that 1 isnt in a key lol im not a +fukkin musik queer how shuld i kno anyway i hope to see u all their to +experiense the thrill of our decibles +% +If there is one thing that OSS has shown, it is that full time software +teams do not produce better quality products than the amateurs (example: +Linux v. windows) +% +If Microsoft gets rid of that millions lines of spaghetti code in Windows XP +(expect the same in Longhorn 2006 & Blackcomb 2112) and comes up with a +brand new efficient system that equals the Apple, Apple can finally be laid +to rest. After all Microsoft is the standard, like the Qwerty keyboard. You +are going to have to live with Microsoft and those millions of lines of +spaghetti code for some years to come. +% +I went to some IP that should have taken me to a warez server and it took me +to one with a lot of porn and banners :( +% +It appears as though Robert Hanssen, the American FBI agent accused of +selling American secrets to the Russians, was a registered Linux user!!! +This is further evidence, as if any more was needed, that Linux and +communism are inseperable, and that anyone using Linux is supporting the +communist murder of millions! +% +Final Fantasy? Please. The game is slow and repetitive. Meanial tasks such +as just finding your way out of a cave can be extremely difficult. Also, you +must power up / gain levels buy engaging in mini-conflicts throughout the +game. These conflicts require NO eye / hand coordination, are extremely +tedious and occur about, oh, every 1.5 seconds. If you enjoy games that keep +you moving and require "gaming" skills, stay away from this game. I enjoy +the idea of a "Fantasy" concept, but, personally, I would much rather read +Tolkein than spend 5 hours running around in circles trying to find an exit +from just one screen of this game. +% +Longhorn? More like shoehorn, the way they're trying to cram all these new +"features" into it. +% +Haha, you NSYNC lovin' assholes really got burned this time. Why can't you +just shut your mouths and accept their demise?? They are all losers.. JC +has to share that woman from Desperate Housewives with 3 other guys. And +Justin, oh my gosh, he isn't even man enough to hold on to Britney (and +judging by her new husband it shouldn't be that hard). I'm just glad Back +Street Boys have released their new album. They were the original band that +every record company cloned. Just goes to show you the true acts are the +last acts!! BSB 4ever!~ +% +One time I was masturbating in the closet and my brother walked in but he +tripped and his mouth landed on my cock and he was yawning but I was almost +done and at that point the burglar alarm went off and I came and my brother +tried to get up and run away but his pants got caught on the door and tore +off and he fell backwards onto me and my mom walked in and saw it it was +horrible. +% +I swear i must be the only person that can use IE and not get all that crap. +I bet its because i know not press the X button on a popup...Yeah i bet +thats it. Oh and i dont go to a warez sites like an idiot. +% +im poor by choice fag. living in the mud just to get away. if i want money i +can get it peice of piss +% +ObjC is able to use C code directly without change. That's why MS is pushing +C# - it makes it harder to port code to OSX. With Windows projects done in +C, most of the code can remain unchanged. You just add a little ObjC to +handle the system stuff. With C#, most of the code must be completely +rewritten. +% +only furries have faggoty butterfly and angel wings, us gargoyles have real +mans wings +% +girl, you must be herbal essences because masturbating with you is a totally +organic experience +% +Hey guys. I just came from Best Buy with my dad and saw this a-ni-me called +'Neon Genesis Evangelion' and my dad let me bought it, so now I have it with +me but I've been reading about it and they say there is nudity in it. I'm +not sure if my parents will allow me to watch it, last time they found my +Hentai folder they changed my parental controls to Young Teen for a month. +It's not fair. I'm 19. I'm hiding my Hentai in Documents and Settings now. +% +there are 2 bits in bathroom binary. a number 1 (01) is taking a piss. a +number 2 (10) is taking a poop. a number 3 (11) is a shitpiss where you poop +and pee at the same time. +% +How about the enviroment? Canonical clearly does not care much for +enviromental protection. The amount of Ubuntu CDs they have dumped in the +past is unacceptable. They have reached AOL quantities. +% +Don't obscure the topic at hand with "facts". History has always been made +through quick, instinctual choices. Intellect is nothing but a distraction +when it comes to life shattering situations. Look at how it has defined our +history. Do you think I am about to turn away from the legacy of generations +before me? Alternative methods take longer, and never completely solve the +problem. It is easier for the mass populace to attack a problem +straightforward. Consideration for things slows down the pulse of results. +% +Oh man oh man. There was my dad, pissed as all hell dirty and oily in his +work clothes yelling at the little pimple faced manager. "Sir we can't +replace your monitor because you did not purchase it here." "I BRING MONITOR +IN AND YOU FIX, THEN YOU DROP AND EXPECT ME PAY, I DO NOT THINK!!!!!!!" +After about 15 minutes of this we walked out of there with a brand new 15 +inch packard bell. Then I went home and played wing commander 2 till I got +tired, masturbated to sailor moon porn and went to bed. +% +Everyone else in the classroom was laughing at me. Due to my weakness, I was +unable to push him away. I tried to wiggle my mostly ornamental white velcro +shoes but that only encouraged him. I was thrown from my wheel chair and +rolled onto my back. That's when the torture started. That day I was +violated with every pen, pencil, crayon and glue bottle those insufferable +retards could lay their malformed mitts on. +% +faggot! get the fuck out of here. we don't take kindly to you people around +here. you're worse than the niggers. at least the niggers are predictable - +they just want to make illegitimate children, eat fried chicken, and steal +cars - you faggots, who the fuck knows what you're going to do next? +% +I have been testing Longhorn prereleases for weeks now and I have to say +that it's extremely buggy. Micro$oft has a long way to go before they +catch upto Apple. +% +i have a girlfriend who was raped when she was in high school. not only that +she got molested by family member. even though it has been 8 years since +that happened, she is still disturbed and when she sees something on tv or +movie that remind her, she cries. at which point i rape her. what a whore! +% +Wee! Look at me! I'm a faggot masochist with my faggot masochists' OS! Look +at me! Look at me! Look at me! I can't play WMVs! Ain't I cool! +% +I can't believe I just took a shit in my Wookie costume at the Star Wars +convention. What the fuck? I can't stand up and take it to waste chute +because I am literally wading in a feces-filled fur suit at this very +moment. Any change in battle stance would send this rancid bantha poodoo +spilling down my legs and into view of every Jedi Knight within 30 feet of +me. There is no way I can play this off as a fart. It doesn't help that I've +eaten nothing but doritos and pepsi for the passed 3 days. I can hardly +think straight! How am I possibly going to explain this to my mom when she +comes back from the store to ask me what the fuck I just did in the presence +of Boba Fett. She'll make me drop trau in front of everyone again. There it +is. The Ewok at the signing booth to the right of me just asked if I could +smell 'that'. I gotta go. +% +Christianity was founded and propagated by Jews. It is also the source of +Western art, morality, and science. +% +Your argument is not very compelling. Everyone knows I'm not here to "get +down", I'm here specifically to crush you in debate and I'm not going to +spend much time here either as I am quickly dulled by this sort of thing. +% +A note to the idiot who keeps sending me anonymous emails claiming to have +"f*cked" my mother: 1) Do you really think i don't have your IP address and +have a relatively good idea of who you are? 2) Do you really think I care +about your weird sexual fantasies? 3) Have you even SEEN my mother? HAHAHA +4) Keep it up. The messages are being logged, stored and passed on to the +relevant authorities and, of course, your ISP... 5) I know where you are. +% +I masterbate using a Johnsonville 'Cheddarwurst' in each hole and a vibe on +my button. I have acheived 48 orgasms in two hours with this technique. +% +I used to find ways to jack off around my mom while she wasn't looking. I +have even shot off onto her while she was asleep at night and my dad was at +work. She was a heavy sleeper and it wasn't any problem to gently uncover +her and wack off right in front of her. I have even gotten completely naked +and stood on a kitchen chair I pulled up next to her bed and blew my load +completely across the bed, never hitting her with any of it all. The time I +remember most is when I came home drunk (again) and she was already asleep. +I got totally naked and went to her room. Luckily, she was completely +uncovered and snoring like a cow. It was like I had special ordered this +because she was laying flat on her back with her knees folded out like she +was expecting me. I looked at her tight little panties and could see the +split plain as day. She kept a letter opener on the night stand next to her +bed for when she opens the mail each night before she goes to bed. It was +the kind with the razor blade in it. I used the letter opener to cut her +panties right across the crotch. I jumped when they snapped apart. I wasn't +expecting that. Mom never moved. She just laid there snoring like a bear. I +thought to myself this was too good to be true. And since I was already +naked, I thought about how I could slip over top of her and try to touch my +dick to her open pussy. I knew I couldn't actually stick it in her without +waking her up. I must have tried ten times to get on top but couldn't do it. +I did, however, manage to actually lick her pussy(very lightly at first). +After a couple of licks, I got brave and put my toung inside a little bit. +Once I did that, I knew I was pushing it so I eased off the side of the bed +and jacked off standing as near her face as I could without waking her. I +wanted to shoot my load on her face but I chickened out. I turned toward her +still open legs and tried to blow it on her pussy. I did manage to get it +all over her leg. She never budged. Sometimes I think she knew the whole +time and just let me get myself off because she may have actually liked it. +I sometimes wonder if she had always known when I was doing my thing around +her. I got away with things you could not believe sometimes. I even put my +throbing swelled dick in her hand once while she was sleeping in the +recliner watching television. I didn't keep it there long but it was enough +for me to go to the bathroom and beat off like a fool. +% +I was sitting alone at home one night, curled up in a blanket on the couch. +I was watching "Sex in the City" and I heard a knock at the door. I got up, +and looked out the peephole. It was Kobe Bryant. I was very surprised, I do +not know him personally. I opened the door and let him in, because hey, its +not like a huge NBA star is there to rob you or anything! After he stepped +in the foyer, he grabbed me and made me swallow my chewing gum. I +immediately blurted out that was a horrible thing to do because it will stay +in there for 7 years! Kobe began laughing incredibly hard, then grabbed me +again. Before I could even scream, he was ripping off my pants and lowering +my panties, "jamming" his enormous dong into my tight, but willing cunny. He +truly began raping me viciously in every hole, but it wasnt rape. I hadn't +had sex in the past year, and I really needed this. Especially from such a +well endowed man. As he thrusted in and out, he picked me up and moved me +into the kitchen. I didnt have any idea why. He opened the freezer and +removed my frozen pre-made chicken nuggets. He popped them in the microwave +and continued his sexual escapade. Kobe began sniffing loudly, pulling in +immense amounts of air through his huge negro nostrils. "Whats wrong, Kobe? +Keep Thrusting!" I yelled, as I was nearing climax. But he continued +sniffing uncontrollably. He then dropped me on the floor, reached in the +microwave and grabbed the plate of nuggets. The worst thing ever happened +next. He grabbed each nugget, smelled it, licked it, and then jammed it +right into his anus. Before long, Kobe's anus was full of Tyson's very best +nuggets, and I was masturbating to my second climax (I, however, did not +notice him doing his thing with the nuggets). The next thing, however, was +what shocked, surprised, and scarred me for life. Kobe walked over to me, +and said "Ya hungry?" I said "Were you cooking those nuggets for us to eat? +How thoughtful of you!" To my surprise, he said "No way bitch! Now eat up!" +and he sat right down on my face and began to shit the nuggets, one by one, +into my mouth. He exhibited amazing anal control, and surprisingly the shit +encrusted nuggets tasted fabulous. Kobe has been coming over whenever the +Lakers are in town for the past year ohh yeah. +% +i hacked into an airline's computer systems and stole a huge bunch of +frequent flyer points then traded them in for merchandise and got a sony +playstation 2 +% +HEY BABE WHO WOULD WIN PIRATES.... OR NINJA??? ALSO NOTE I DID NOT USE AN S +BECAUSE NINJA IS JAPANESE AND THEY DONT HAVE PLURALS DO YOU LIKE JAPAN +% +It was only -after- I took the lethal dose of aspirin that I realized I +couldn't find my Evanescence CDs anywhere!! My elaborate suicide plans were +ruined, but as you can imagine I am quite used to disappointment... so +sleepy... +% +Don't you dare talk to me like I don't know my profession. +% +Congratulations, prick, you've just made my ignore list. Was it worth it to +you to make your "witty" comments and snide in-jokes to your irc pals about +me if it meant you are now disappeared from my online experience? Have a +nice life. +% +A computer scientist? what are your credentials as a scientist? How have +you furthered scientific knowledge? I am a scientist. PhD in space science, +as a matter of fact. A veritable rocket scientist. I have also developed +software for the last 25 years. I have headed software projects and +delivered software to some important customers, including the DoD. So +forgive me if I take exception to some programmer hack calling himself a +scientist. +% +"Star Wars" was the highlight of my abusive childhoo. My father brutally +belted me frequently, and the rest of the family, a term which I use very +loosely, just hid what he did to me. +% +Doesn't matter. Once the US housing bubble collapses there will be a total +economic collapse. Companies like Netflix and Amazon will go bankrupt as +Americans just try to save enough for food +% +I think that the present lack of comments on this article, combined with the +subject matter of this article, speaks volumes about the so-called open +source community. +% +girl you must be Frogger because I would cross rush hour traffic and +cascading rivers in order to hop in your hole 6 times in a row +% +If you want to make full use of your hardware use Windows. If you want to +waste days trying to get an alpha OS to work with hacked drivers and +illegally reverse engineered applications mostly written by ugly teenagers +who stop doing it once they get laid then by all means use Linux. +% +it's so weird seeing Obi Wan Kenobe playing Alfred +% +girl, you must be an HTTP status code because all i'm getting is: 402 +Payment Required +% +I hate when people think they're saving the world just by riding their bike. +It's like those black and white couples that think they're fighting racism +just by fucking each other. +% +Your a stupid fucker. You know no one gives a shit about what you say. Pipe +down and go check on your emerging gentoo box -- ooh i think your +_ricer_kernel_ just finished building. +% +one time i killed this hippie and scraped the resin off his lungs and i died +of a weed overdose +% +For instance: throughout all of my time in elementary school there was this +one kid who would go to the bathroom so he could poop. But he had a phobia +of water splashing up his crack or something like that. I say this because +he would go into the stall, take down his pants, and while still standing, +proceed to shit on the floor right in front of the toilet. It was weird when +you would go to the bathroom and you would see a burgundy loaf on the floor +of the bathroom. And it was always in the same bathroom. +% +I'm not perfect in english, but I was on college forums when I was in +college, and you wouldn't have lasted two minutes with anyone with your +kiddy type gibberish. +% +Stupid internet faggots get obsessed with the most inane things. If it's +from Japan or runs on Linux watch the fuck out cause these losers will act +like Jesus appeared on Earth. +% +there is no such thing as hardcore gaming, anymore then there is anything +extreme about mountain dew livewire +% +Sometimes when I get bored I stick screw drivers in my piss hole (preferably +phillips head) Then I thumb around my sphincter with my womenlike finger +nails scraping the days left overs and sniff it for 10 minutes. +% +since blacks have bigger wangs... do black chicks have bigger holes? +% +As a professional shrink, I was appauled while observing Tom Cruise as he +underwent a complete alteration of personality on national television. +Although his aggressive display did not make me think him gay, I certainly +wondered if he was forgetting his Lithium or if we were watching one of his +alternate personalities! Truly mindboggling behavior! +% +Her lips bit onto his, opened, and began force vomiting shit down his +throat. Her fingers dug deep into his flesh and John struggled as Kihnda +pulled him down. Into the toilet, into her kind, warm love, where they could +be forever. John tried to break free. He didn.t make it. The shit was too +strong. His penis still erect, a die-hard pervert to the end, loving every +last fucking minute of it, John drowned in his cannibal leavings. +% +i wipe turd on my tallywacker. im not happy, sometimes i touch my mouth +after playin with faeces. i think i have syphalis or scruvy..god bless +triffle, i put my balls in triffle....my pubes are 4 inches long. +% +Fucked in the ass non-stop, ream my hole, with a helicopter prop, I love ass +fucking, yes it's true, I douche my ass nightly, so there's no poo. I'm a +fanatic faggot, I love to get raped, got my dad's camcorder, to get it all +on tape. My sphincter's so loose, all my movements are butt juice, in the +war of fists and my ass, there can never be a truce. +% +Liberals deserve to be KILLED. Shot dead. Hit in the head with baseball +bats, hatchets, axes or even ice picks. Hung by their necks from the +nearest lamp post or tree. Liberals are the scum of the earth. Whether +they're in the UK, US or anywhere else, I advocate extreme violence against +liberals! The only good liberal is a dead liberal. +% +I shat on my keyboard today. So I was vaccuming my keyboard to remove the +dried up man juice of my past expeditions into trannybooth.com. I was +playing with different settings on the cleaner, and noticed how it produced +keystrokes when it was blowing. It made me wonder - was my own fart strong +enough to type something? Being the experimenting type, I went ahead and +pulled down my pants, positioned my ass right above the keyboard and let out +a thunderous one. Turned out my bowel had decieved me, for along with the +gas came hot chunks of shit. My computer started beeping like crazy as a +huge log pressed down on the function keys. My keyboard went friggin +shit-brown. There it was, a steaming turd right across my home row. I had to +use fucking motor oil to clean away the fecal matter. I don't know what I'm +going to tell my sister when she finds out the keyboard smells like crap. +% +i don't care if you premium member, i will ctl+alt+dlt u / you little fuck, +i've got year old posts bigger than u/ before i lost weight, back in +ninety-eight/ you was wack posting over at gbs i seen u/ then you came to +FYAD, switch your demeanor, well - we don't believe you, you need more +people/ troll phds of the game, we passed them classes; nobody could read +you 05 dudez like we do/ don't let 'em gas you like lowtax; he'll harass +you/ trust me on this one - i'll e-detach you/ hand from keyboard, eyes from +screen/ they'll have to hold a cybervigil, put your webcam live stream/ no, +you're not on my level get your mouse tweaked/i posted what ya did all year +in my first week/ (chorus) niggaz'll hijack your post, make you report to +admin/ your faggot topics i'll unpin, make your drives spin and spin/ we +bring - humor to ur thread, kill your bullshit drama/ too much bytes for ur +modem, go run to ya momma/ +% +Flopping and flailing, tugging and yanking, rolling my micro-burrito between +my thumb and forefinger, I desperately Google "Hairy Asian Pussy"... "Big +Black Tits"... "Shaved Mature Naked"... but am unable to focus on any single +image long enough to construct a suitable fantasy. I click rapidly from one +photo to the next, accidentally smearing vitamin E oil on the keyboard and +mouse, all through the night until morning's cruel rays mock my soft, +greasy loins. +% +one time i smoked so much weed i got to like level 99 of being high then i +kept smoking and my high reset back to level 0 and i was perfectly sober +except my hair turned yellow +% +STAR WARS EWOX JEDI X-WING GREEDOO DEATH STARS ANAKIN VADER JABBA HUT + LIGHTSABERS VULCANZ HAN SOLO AT-ATs PADAWAN YODA ITS A TRAP CP30 +CHEWIE +% +Your theories interest me and I wish to subscribe to your newsletter. +% +Also, if you have ever billboarded a request (posting a request more than +once in order to have it more visible) then you are in my killfiter as well. + This is nothing personal, I just need to filter abuse in order to enjoy +Usenet. +% +Do you really think that KDE is completely under GPL? You are either +uninformed or a troll. I think you are a troll who tries to say "If KDE +was under BSD license, Apple had not given any modifications back." +% +Did you know? There is scientific proof that bipedal creatures similar to +modern day wolves, cats and horses existed and even had their own +proto-languages. It is theorized that today's "furries" are the offspring of +these ancient races. +% +The lolly is a phallic symbol. It was invented by man in his eternal quest +to subjugate women and dominate them by teaching children the act of +fellatio at a young age - especially female children. To have equality among +people, we should eliminate such travesties of recreation. But lollies are +too deply entrenched in our society for them to be removed without much +harm. Therefore I propose to balance the situation by introducing a new type +of lolly - it shall contain two sticks instead of one and to consume it, +people must spread out the sticks and lick in between, symbolising +cunnilingus. +% +I can't believe that you banned my firneds computer along with my work one. +What the fuck dude. Can't you fucking deal. I really have no Idea waht the +fucking beef is with me.Really you fucking one. I no longer post during the +day. I look at the site once a week if that. Really. If you see that fake +persona only had 12 post over 2 months. THat is rediculus for me. So really +fuck you. I can't believe that you banned my friends computer cause i posted +on it. What did you want me to do.Worst part is that I have had convoy's +with you on the other board and I know you have had no IDEA who I am.Man +dude get in touch with me and lets hash this shit out. I am sick of this +shit.Better yet call me so I can bitch you out over the phone and get this +over with..Ps. I am not crunk right now just drunk and go ahead and bann +this IP addy wile your at it you fuck head. +% +This has to be the most pathetic attempt at flaming I've ever seen. I was +laughing, so if that's what you intended, congratulations, otherwise, +perhaps it would behoove you to find out what autism is before make stupid, +unwitty posts about sufferers of the disease. Now, if you'd like to try to +flame me, make it a real flame. +% +Well, I can't waste all day in this IRC. Gotta go to a T5 meet for some +training. Gotta place high in this years TiT and Evo2k5 tournaments. (Tekken +5.) See ya guys. :( +% +I've been foruming for ten years, been a moderator / admin of forums and all +that. It gets old after awile. I enjoy trolling shitty websites more than +anything. +% +When I got home, the dog looked like it needed some more sex, so I unzipped +my cock and inserted it into the hound. We had sex all night. When it was +dead in the morning, I was still raping it. When I was 80 years old and the +corpse was decomposed and crawing with maggots, I was still ejaculating my +seed into the empty shell. Later, I died. +% +Don't rely on risky conventional aphrodesiacs. Our patented formula +harnesses the power of a biochemical reaction to create controlled +explosions in your testicles, propelling you into the INCREDIBLE SEMEN-FREE +EXPLOSIVE ORGASM of a lifetime! She'll never cheat on you again after she +feels the POWER of our patented testicle exploding forumula. +% +BETTER NOT HEAR OF ANYONE BREAKING THIS ONE OR SEE DELETED. This is a ribbon +for soldiers fighting in Iraq. Pass it on to everyone and pray. Something +good will happen to you tonight at 11:11 PM. This is not a joke. Someone +will either call you or will talk to you online and say that they love you. +Do not break this chain. Send this to 13 people in the next 15 minutes. Go +% +do you ever get these weird urges to jerk off.. and then after you do you +get this sick feeling in your stomach like you're going to throwup and +passout ? +% +Okay, so you want to mack it with the ladies, but don't know where to start? + How about you groom yourself you fucking pig. Here's your first lesson: +WOMEN HATE MEN WITH BALL HAIR. There are some common technique for removal +(i.e. razor, electric razor, nair) but my favorite is the time proven method +of plucking. Start by sitting in a chair. Now, stretch your penis between +your testicles and hold it there. This will decrease the electric signals +being sent to your brain everytime you pluck, bye bye pain! You should be +done in about 10 minutes, and after that, you're on your way to Fellatio +Farms. Go getum Cassanova. +% +Emoticons are useful, since they can at least partially take the place of +facial expressions, gestures, and tone of voice, all of which give clues to +meaning beyond what your mere words convey, in face to face dialogue. They +can easily be overused though, or used in a far too cutesy fashion, somewhat +like a girl dotting her i's with big pink hearts. If your email has more +than one or two emoticons in it, yo +% +Frankly, I am appalled at the way that members here treat the underground +furry community. It seems to me like nobody here really understands anything +about the furry way of life. I mean, seriously, do you know how freeing it +is be honest about being encased in a human body whilst having an animal +soul? +% +What the fuck does it mean? What's the point? Is that sticker telling me to +drive more carefully because you've spawned, and you're carrying said spawn +in your auto-mobile? Why should I care? You're obvously an idiot, so why +should I have any regard for the waste matter that sprung screaming from +your idiot loins? I'm gonna drive how I'm gonna drive. Just because you've +gone out of your way to inform me that you happen to be transporting your +worthless Shit-Factory doesn't mean I'm going to alter my driving style in +the least. And that's another thing. That shit automatically assumes that +I'm the shitty driver. What about you? Shouldn't you be the one driving more +carefully because your squealing tit-sucker is in the passenger seat? Why +are you telling me about it? If I'm walking to the post office to mail a +priceless Ming vase, I don't shout at every person on the street "FRAGILE! +FRAGILE CONTENTS HERE, BE CAREFUL WALKING AROUND ME!" No, that would be +stupid. However, buying some stupid-ass 99 cent sticker that says "Baby on +Board" is supposed to magically transform everyone on the freeway into +perfect drivers. +% +I am a 15 year old guy, I am 5'7", and HATE humanity. I despise every piece +of life around me, and I understand that this might classify me as insane, +but so what. I HATE christians(well most of them, but not all) because all +they do is shove there religon on you, why don't they just let me believe +what I want? But anyways, just come on in, and see what I have been feeling +like today. Later... +% +u all people are goddam nigger fucktards! fuck u all! nigger fucktards! eat +my shit motherfuckers! goddam nigger fucktards! fucktards all! god damn you +nigger fucktards! +% +girl you must be the recently cancelled television show "enterprise" because +no matter how many fat sweaty nerds profess their love for you, you are +still just a piece of shit whore that no respectable man would allow himself +to be seen in public with +% +girl, u must have a 2d20 spell resistance because you are resisting my magic +missile +% +Face it, you just want an ipod so you can hack the firmware to make it +vibrate then stick the smooth case up your ass you big FAG!!! +% +You don't me, but I was looking through yahoo profiles and I saw that you +are in Texas City. The reason that I'm writing to you is I'm a handsome, +goodlooking straight male. But lately I've been getting the urge to know how +does it feel to suck a cock. I'm very serious about this, this is not a +joke. If you havent' figured it out yet, I'd like to suck your dick. You +might look at this email and not be interested at all, and I'd understand if +you don't. If your not interested, you can write me back and tell me to go +to hell, and I won't bother you again. To let you know, a guy sucks better +cock than any female, cause only a guy knows what a guy likes. If you're +interested, it will be secretly and discreet. If you are interested, just +write me and let me know. If your not, like I said, just tell me to go to +hell. Let me know. +% +Linux Scat Ode : The chat has moved off this mortal coil. To replace the +entertainment , my pants : I'll soil! Turds smashing into the boxers all +nite. I'll take them off and sniff. Ohh yeah. Dats rite. The smell is +divine, the taste is great. Now all I need is a paper plate. Going to +Butch's with this fresh poopie. I hope he's thirsty. Because this poop is : +soupy. My bowel movements are incredibly loose. Thats ok, I lo Its a shame +that my body is nothing but lard. Oh the life of a Linux Fatty Shit-eating +Scat Fiend. Oh no mom is comming!!! This chat session : screen'd +% +When I installed Linux it asked me for my credit card number. Two days later +I got a call from Wachovia asking me if I had purchased $400 worth of +Totino's pizza rolls and Mountain Dew (I hadn't). Let this be a warning to +all of you out there in the Internet. +% +didnt ben franklin invent lightning or was that edison? +% +So I'm out with my niece at our local shopping mall here in Philadelphia, +called the Gallery, we had just gotten some delicious banana yogurt +shakes...and who do we see but Mr. Hasselhoff! He was signing sneakers at +Foot Locker, apparently he has a new line of Sketchers out or something (?) +and there he was. I told him that I used to wish i had a car like Kitt and +he laughed and then i laughed and then he got really serious all of a +sudden.He leaned close and whispered to me that Kitt was real. He said he +could press a button and Kitt would come flying into the mall right there +running over people and causing massive havoc. I'm not sure if he was +kidding or not but my niece got real scared and spilled her banana yogurt +shake. Is this unusual for Mr. Hasselhoff to act like this? This is our +first David sighting and to be honest i was a little nervous. +% +YOU ARE THE BIGGEST FUCKING GROUP OF UTTER. FUCKING. IDIOTIC. SHIT EATING. +CIRCLEJERK. FAGGOTS. EVER. TO. WALK. THE. EARTH. NOTHING YOU SAY TO ME CAN +HURT ME AT ALL! YOU ARE NOT INTELLIGENT, EDGY OR COOL, YOU ARE JUST A +PATHETIC FUCKING PIECES OF SHIT WHO LIKE TO BELLITLE OTHERS OVER THE +INTERNET TO FEEL BETTER ABOUT THEMSELVES. FUCK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! +% +So you're working out and getting buff so you are strong to do what? +"Getting women" as if they are objects to do what? Fuck them and forget +about it? Some life. "Getting women" improves your social status amongst +those who hi-five people for being "playa"s. Who gives a damn about being +more social amongst those vapid wastes of food and employment? Video games +are a great way to have fun, and enjoy things that are availible to you in +life. Not only this, but the making of a game is an art form - by playing +through, say, an RPG, you are treated to a grand story that is just +overwhelmingly more fufilling than going out, fucking some chick, hi-fiving +yourself and calling it a night. +% +for the past several years I've been mailing all my feces to Ralph Nader. +Every time I defecate, I do so in a zip lock bag, which I then send to Ralph +Nader's home address via USPS priority mail. Though I always clearly write +my name and address on the return portion of the envelope, I have never +recieved a reply, nor have any of my mailings been refused :| +% +I lick my own fecal matter from time to time, it's not as bad as you'd +think. I even got my old girlfriend to try it, I talked it about it for so +long, I actually convinced her to wipe me after a dump with her tounge. She +got stabbed by some guy 2 months later. +% +A beautiful young lady is on her knees sucking my cock. I am leaning forward +and bracing myself against the wall. I can feel her spreading my ass cheeks +to allow her boyfriend to enter me. He's in and starting to stroke in and +out. Every forward thrust pushes my cock further and further into her mouth. +I can feel her reaching under my balls to feel his cock going in and out of +my ass. +% +just went to micro$ofts web site to get some drivers for my cousin and it +locked my machine - Of course I am using unbuntu and firefox - funny thing +is when I unplugged my network cable I got my mouse back and disconnected +from their site - seems everything works fine now but I sure hope they +weren't trying to put sypware or root kit on my computer. they will hear +from if I find anything. piss off microsoft - what are you now keeping +people that don't run your os from your web site. +% +Did you know that the first knights in Medieval times were actually Negroid? +Indeed, the word "knight" comes from the Old English "niht" meaning night or +darkness. As time progressed, more and more Caucasians were accepted into +this sacrosanct brotherhood, but many historians agree that, while King +Arthur was definitely a white man, his entire round table of knights were +exclusively colored! +% +I'm gambling that Apple is expecting to keep profit margins up by keeping +return/repair rates extremely low by using quality components +% +i need dank nugs, smoke roach bugs, bird-man lugs, tree smokin thugs, i'm on +a mission to secure a blunt, don't be pullin no bogartin' stunt, hoardin +that shit ain't really kind, absorb that herb into yo mind, smokin' and +tokin' until you're blind, what out for 5-0 or you gonna get fined +% +All this "linux dependabilty uptime unix lol" bullshit is just that, a crock +of shit. How fucking hard is it to hit a goddamn reset button, you fat +fucking sysadmins? I realize your just about to hit level 87 in everquest +and you're already sweating from reaching for that jolt cola but for the +love of god PLEASE stop using these stupid, unusable operating systems! +% +My favorites: Maxell 80 Minute Pro (blue) for solid robust low end, detail +and clean immediacy; Maxell Music 80 minute gold for a balanced +hight-to-mid-to-bottom and wide sparkle; Fuji 80 Minute Audio for a wetter +sound (smoothes out the edges). Memorex Music 80 minutes is very nice, Taiyo +Yuden 700 MB are close, the Mitsui and BASF are in there, Sony could be +better... +% +Ecstasy, also known as MDMA, is popular in raves as a drug that promotes +tolerance. An empathogen, ecstasy gives its user heightened acceptance +towards other people. Why not use this power to pacify racists? My idea +calls for the forced injection of MDMA into racists, or risk the loss of +property. After developing an initial addiction to ecstasy, users will be +required to fuel their addiction by purchasing more of the substance. +Government-run vendors can sell their wares to give wealth back to minority +communities. This scheme will allow the racists to become normal, productive +members of society while putting more money in the hands of those that need +it the most. +% +Don't the greedy boneheads at Thompson Multimedia and Fraunhofer +Gesellschaft see that they are poisoning their own water supply by causing +the Open Source community to develop better, and free, codecs like Ogg +Vorbis? +% +So there I was zipping through the skies of Iraq in a helicopter my +associates had rented from Blackpool. We had been sweating it out as we were +forced to maintain a low altitude to stay under the AAF radar, which kept us +safe from missile batteries but exposed us to any ground troops we happened +across. We were almost home free to the green zone, when we heard the +telltale WHOOSH! of a shoulder-mounted ground-to-air missile. The pilot +screamed and in a flash we were spiraling out of control and the ground was +rushing up to meet us. When I came to, I thought I must be in heaven, +because the wind was gently rustling the green grass that seemed to be +cushioning me. I smiled at the feeling of the warm sun upon my face. Then +the Arabic men came. While a thin wiry one waved his rifle and screamed +unintelligibly at me, one of the fat ones pulled me up by the hair to my +knees and unzipped his khaki reliefs. Out sprung the largest cock I've ever +seen on a dark-skinned man. It smelled of couscous and camels, and when he +forced it down my throat I could taste a hint of Brut. They all took turns +throat-raping me, and they all had a good laugh when my screams abruptly +stopped as one of the larger cocks dislocated my larynx from my throat down +into my stomach and I began to bleed from my nose and ears. After they were +all satisfied, they pointed their barrels at me and I felt hot lead tearing +through my body. As I lay prone on the ground, just before I blacked out, I +felt something hot on my back and realized that the fat one was urinating +all over my broken American corpse ohh yeah +% +i was going through the logs in my toilet today and i found a letter. i +don't remember eating a letter. funny thing is.. it was a letter from my +colon telling me to eat less fiber. ps: i'm shutting down until you have +sex with men. after plowing the fields of the nearest 12 guys i could find, +my brother walks into the room. he says, "haha jokes on you i put that note +in your turd. you just fucked a bunch of dudes for nothing, homo!" this is +why i hate procreation. +% +girl, you must be from stdout because i'd like to pipe you +% +We've got Justice Kennedy writing decisions based upon international law, +not the Constitution of the United States? That's just outrageous. And not +only that, but he said in session that he does his own research on the +Internet? That is just incredibly outrageous. +% +is it gay that sometimes when i take a shit i get goosebumps all over my +body? +% +You sick, sick butthole licking UNIX fags. How DARE you use the disgusting +and fecal OS that is Linux. Windows is BEST! You fags get raped in the mind +by Tux. His fag penguin guise makes you shreik out in terror for Windows, +but he fuckes you so much you are forced to use Linux. I bet the fags who +reply to this are being ass raped as we speak. Linux is buggy, slow, bloated +and turns you into a fag. Windows is best! You huge fruits and your lies +about bill games must cease. +% +YOU KNOW, YOU NEEDLE-DICKED PANSIES COWER IN FEAR WHEN I WHIP MY TOWERING +CYCLOPS OUT. MY PENIS CONSUMES LIGHT AND WHOLE ASTEROIDS LIKE THEY WERE +NOTHING. ONE TIME I GOT AN ERECTION AND WELL THAT CAUSED A WHOLE GALAXY TO +BE SHATTERED BY THE SHEER FORCE. WHEN I EJACULATE IT CAUSES THE +GRAVITATIONAL CONSTANT OF THE UNIVERSE TO BE ALTERED BECAUSE OF THE SUDDEN +INCREASE IN MASS. AT THE END OF TIME THERE WILL BE NOTHING LEFT IN THE +UNIVERSE BUT DARK MATTER AND MY PENIS. MY PENIS EXISTS IN FOUR DIMENSIONS, +EXPANDING OUTWARD AT LIGHT SPEED LIKE TIME ITSELF. MY PENIS COMPOSES THE +UNIVERSE AND TICKLES AZATHOTH'S OMNIPOTENT BUNGHOLE WHEN THE STARS ARE +RIGHT. ENTROPY IS BUT A FART IN THE WIND FOR MY PENIS. MY PENIS CAN BREAK +MATHEMATICS! IT IS ABLE TO TRANSCEND REALITY AND DESTROY HUMAN THOUGHT WITH +ITS SHEER VOLUME AND MASS. MY PENIS HAS A PENIS, AND THAT PENIS IS STILL +BIGGER THAN YOUR PENIS. +% +Remember the Alamo! Shoot 'em! To show you how radical I am, I want +carjackers dead. I want rapists dead. I want burglars dead. I want child +molesters dead. I want the bad guys dead. No court case. No parole. No early +release. I want 'em dead. Get a gun and when they attack you, shoot 'em. +% +I use Firefox sometimes, but it really isn't that good. I'd rathewr use IE +than Firefox because who knows what these open-source people can do with +your credit card numbers. Not that Microsoft needs anymore money, so they +won't try to scab it off me. And at least they patch their browser +automatically with Automatic Updates +% +I'm saying to all the rappers keep it real. Not everyone on your road crew +likes pussy and you know it. The stylists that lean in your face, do your +make up, braid your hair may just have your body guards dick on his breath - +while he is all in yo grill. +% +picture yourself at college. she's the foreign exchange student from ... not +china, the other one. in any case her english is poor and she laughs at even +your shittiest jokes without understanding. you know she likes you. the only +guys after her are skinny adenoidal fags that she gets enough of back home. +she laughs at their jokes too, but it's not them she sits by in class, you +come to associate that class with the smell of her. late one night you're in +the library. she's there because you're there. you take her skinny wrist and +wordlessly lead her to the carousel you booked. there are cameras, and +neither of you care. her breathing flutters and she looks elsewhere as you +pull her close. you slide a hand down there, gliding on silken skin. she +leaks like a swollen sponge that has absorbed all it can. she's never been +fucked in a library before. but she's never met anyone as big and black as +you before. +% +You know how sometimes when you poop, it's a blue color? Well, I had one of +those poops on Friday because I had been eating artificially colored animal +crackers. After pinching a couple out, I thought it would be funny to trick +my girlfriend. I placed them on the coffee table and told her they were +novelty candies. Before I could tell her I was just joking, she took a +bite! Well, after a long weekend in the hospital, my girlfriend died of +spinal meningitis. God's going to punish me for this one, I just know it. +% +Check this shit out. Sucks pubic hair from your furniture and sextoys +without stopping every 5 minutes to douche. The Dyson DC 14 Animal features +a telescopic vibrating dildo that instantly releases semen 17 feet at the +touch of a vein. In addition, the DC 14 Animal features a wide vagina that +picks up large hookers that other trick ass niggas leave behind. A mini +turbine head-sucking dog and cat combination saves you from tight spaces +like ass, pussy or lips and a low reach faggot tool simplifies the task of +felching under pressure. The DC 14 Animal also features a carpet care kit to +keep your camel toe looking like new. Available at your local zoo. +% +If Jesus was Jewish, then why did he have a Puerto Rican name? You Stupid +Faggots. +% +Dear Sir,With due respect and humility I am writing this mail letter to you +which I believe that this letter will not embarrassed you as we have not met +or seen each other before.My name is Pastor Steve Camara, from republic of +Benin in west Africa region, pastor in charge of Revival Church Of God +Mission (RCGM) here in Abidjan Cote D' Ivoire.I am writing you in regards of +money transfer which late Pope John Paul II reviewed to me a week ago before +his death through feeding tube after his long ill health, that his late wife +who is Mrs. Esther Benson deposited the sum of US$ 4.000.000.00(four Million +Dollars) with a finance house here in Abidjan for the two (2) remaining +children PAUL III AND MARY for there future.Before the death of Pope John +Paul II he told me that this money US$ 4.000.000.00 Dollars wasacquired +genuinely, that his late wife has a diamond shop in there country which was +destroyed during the war that leads to his husband death two year ago +through heart attack.It is because of the confidence he had on me as his +pastor, he told me about this deposit and his last request to me before his +final breat is that I should try as much as I can to look for foreigner, +either individual, company or organisation who can handle this transaction +with care and confidence for the future of her two children that is +presently staying with me as there parents for now as she cannot make it for +them.Finally, if this letter touches your heart and you are willing to be of +assistance to this two children, I will like you to indicate your full +interest to enable me give you more details on how to proceed with this +transfer. Also note that all the deposit document of this money was on this +woman name as the beneficiary that made with the finance house +here.Expecting your urgent mail to this effect.Thanks and remain bless. +% +that is the nerdiest thing i have ever seen aside from my girlfriend and i +wearing matching firefox tshirts +% +girl, you must be in the kkk because i think we'll have a lot of fun once we +get under the sheets +% +Girl, you must be Snort because I'd like to trigger your intrusion detection +systems +% +I'm going to be taking a long vacation in a couple months and I want to take +a sheet of acid over with me. I'd really rather not bring it with me on the +plane as I've seen the security measures at the airport I'll be flying to +and they're pretty strict, so I was thinking of faxing it over before hand. +Anyone know if this would work? +% +girl, you must be grand theft auto: san andreas because once i get inside of +you i'm going to do all sorts of illegal things +% +girl, you must be tiger woods because no matter what you do, you'll still +just be a nigger +% +girl, you must be a dialup internet connection because every time i want to +do something useful on the phone i have to shut you up +% +girl you must be an o'reilly technical manual because despite your high +price tag, you never say anything meaningful +% +girl you must be charles barkley because i want to take you to the hole but +i doubt you would be impressed with my full-court press +% +girl, you must be a rare warez release because after i get my hands on you, +i'm going to pass you off to all of my friends +% +Did you know? Timothy McVeigh conspired with Terry Nichols to destroy the +Alfred P. Murrah Federal Building by exchanging messages using the popular +"Bit Torrent" internet program, which quickly and anonymously allows users +to exchange large volumes of confidential documents. +% +###### REFUSE RACISM & POLITICAL GARBAGE ON OSS #######UBUNTO IS AN +ANTI-WHITE RACIST OS FUNDED BY AN AFRICAN-AMERICAN WHO USES LINUX TO THROW +HIS AFRICAN PROPAGANDA DOWN OUR COLLECTIVE THROATS!!REFRAIN FROM ABUSING OSS +TO PEDAL POLITICAL PROGANDA!HAVING AN OS THAT PEDALS MULTICULTURALISM, +MISCEGENATION AND INTERRACIAL RELATIONS IS THE EQUAL OF AN 'ANTI-JEW OS +BUILD' - UNNACEPTABLE, DISGUSTING AND ANTI-OPEN SOURCE.MR AMERICAN BLACK +SUPREMACIST - OPENSOURCE DOES NOT NEED *NOR WANTS* YOUR MONEY.###### REFUSE +RACISM & POLITICAL GARBAGE ON OSS ####### +% +Punctuation marks that look like smiley faces express happiness on a new +communication tool known as "Internet." The computer network is already +being used by 15 million people worldwide to chat or do important research. +% +Did you know: Google Inc. was the original corporate investor in 50 Cent's +career, advancing him $15,000 to produce his first album "Get Rich Or Die +Tryin" (Interscope 2003). 50 Cent gave Google a grateful nod when he named +his side group "G-Unit" (Google Unit), and they maintain a healthy business +relationship to this day. +% +Russel Simmons is truely a hero amongst us. He owns his own music label, +shoe company, and even a clothing line, rightfully named PHAT FARM! The +clothes are hand stitched together by hundreds of obese naked women sitting +in tubs of sperm. Their only form of payment is cunnilingus performed by +farm animals, hence the clothing name! Simmons is a brilliant man! +% +alright im not a freak lyk you....i dont put little periods after my +sentences..aportophes in my sentences or fricking commas :-D so i'd say you +back the fuck off because your the kind of person NOBODY likes cuz your a +fatass loser with no friends and is a stuck up freak:-) +% +girl you must be the warp core of the starship enterprise because if you +ever start acting up i will dump you +% +All the guys in this IRC channel I hang out in are really profane and gross. +They talk about child porn and act racist a lot of the time, and every night +before I go to bed I pray for God's forgiveness, and for God to forgive +them. Then I remember I'm wiccan. Blessed be! +% +Can anyone tell me how many times these high and mighty evolution scientists +have already backpedalled and changed their version of the truth to fit some +new finding? I've already lost the count... pathetic, really. +% +I am amazed at all the scientists who think they know "facts" when their +theories are not really anything more then a "best guess". And their guesses +care changing all the time. God's story has not changed at all. I believe we +should teach creationism in schools, it will serve more people better. Out +of a high school graduation class of 1000, how many will go on to a career +in science? Say that 700 of them go on to college and that 300 go into the +work force. Of the 700, 100 decide they want to major in physics or +chemistry. Of them 70 get weeded out. You now have 30 people who will +continue. The other 970 people will be better served with an education that +focuses on creationism. We are living in a time with relative ethics. We are +living in an increasing secular society, where life means little. We all +watched in horror as the Teri Shiavo in Florida was starved to death. That +never should have happened, in the light that there is information that her +husband might have beat her the night she collapsed, and the uncertainty of +her wishes. Even our most prized and well written scientists believe in God. +Einstein believed in God, he was quoted as saying "I want to know God's +thoughts, the rest are just details". +% +Growing up in the Deep South you are exposed hunting and trapping at an +early age. I will never forget the time my father got so drunk on Robitussin +that after beating me repeatedly with a rake he went outside to place traps +to ensnare wild animals that we could use for food. After a few ours of +stalking about he came inside and found me lying on the floor half conscious +he chastised me for being a little wuss and kicked me in the kidneys +claiming while shouting something about Jesus before passing out on the +kitchen floor. The next morning the department of fish and game came +knocking at our door asking if we knew anything about the bear traps that +were placed all over the apartment complex. Apparently he had ensnared +several negroes, and, while it was negro season, he was over his bag limit +and had to cut some of them loose. Man, those were the days, sipping +lemonade on the porch while dad skinned niggers in the back yard. +% +girl you must be a game of texas holdem cuz i just wanna go all in +% +You can't talk that way about EverQuest you fag! OMG Just you wait till I +pry my ass out of this chair and lose 400 lbs to climb out of my parents +basement, asshole! You're are SO getting prank called! +% +I watched this whole program on National Geographic entitled 'The Dark Side +of Dolphins' and let me tell you, dolphins are total assholes. So here's +the deal, male dolphins travel in packs of two. These males want to get +laid, and so they trap a female between them and keep her captive for up to +a month, having sex with her as they please. If she tries to get away, they +will beat her with their snouts and fins. When you see large groups of them +it's just a bunch of these two packs of males joining together to keep +captive a few females so that they can gang rape her. The females hate it +and try to get away but then get beaten up. If and when the female gives +birth she won't want to have sex while protecting her young, and so males +will gang up and try in some instatnces to kill the baby inorder to have sex +with the mother. Bottom line, dolphins are assholes. According to marine +biolgoists dolphins could have normal courtship and sex, but the males +choose not to they prefer gang rape. Dolphins are assholes. +% +what did you have for breakfasT? your mom? what did you have for lunch your +dad? .. what did you eat between that a fucking pig fuck man eww ur so nasty +whatcha gunna eat for supper your fucking neighbors family and all your +fucking pets +% +I AM GOING TO SHIT IN YOUR OWN ASS SO FAR IT COMES OUT OF YOUR MOUTH WHICH I +WILL THEN SWALLOW AND THEN SHIT INTO YOUR MOUTH SO YOU WILL BE EATING MY +SHAT SHIT WHILE SHITTING. +% +girl you must be my shitty internet service provider because you're going to +kick me off of you after approximately 5 hours +% +I am a nose-picker. I cannot stand having crunchy snot clinging to the +insides of my nostrils, or feeling something dangling there in the back. So +I dig it out. I'm also like this about cleaning my ears; I cannot stand +feeling that there's something in there. Yuck. A bonus to all this is that I +get a slight rush of euphoria when I dig out a really big booger, or find a +lot of wax in my ear. It's similar to the rush of having squeezed out a +prize-winning poop. +% +girl you must be OSX because you're beautiful and alluring but mostly +worthless +% +any 1 got the move tripple x with vin deasal, not pr0n +% +girl you must be a free porn website, because after one 10 minute visit i'll +never see you again +% +girl, you must be internet explorer because you give me popups all the time +% +girl you must be a hydroponic grow system because i cant wait to introduce +my seeds +% +girl you must be a micro$oft product because when i find your holes i'm +going to exploit them +% +girl you must be java bytecode because you let me use you anywhere I want +% +girl you must be a .bin with no .cue file because I have to wrangle with you +for hours only be burned in the end +% +girl u must be an NES cartridge because i will blow on your slot until you +start functioning +% +girl you must be ieee-1284 because i can tell that your port is bidirectional +% +girl u must be aol instant messenger because i'd like to see all of my +buddies on you +% +thats why i prefer anime hentai then real porn.... majority of porn is +usally ugly both the body and faces its rare which you dont get the ugly +(usally comes with alot of air brushing)... and its usally the non nude +models which offer something close to hentai in cuteness/hot and non-old +porn models. +% +fuck shit bitch ass tits. Lets suck some cock get knocked up and pass out in +a ditch. 9911 emergency room party. smoke dat hanger into yo womb. <3 my mom +had so many abortions im surprised im not in a jar of formaldehyde <3 you +dumb fucking p r e g g e r s +% +BREAKING NEWS: THE RING-LEADER OF THE INFAMOUS INTERNATIONAL PEDOPHILE RING +"THE CATHOLIC CHURCH" HAS DIED, HE WAS 84. +% +I leaned down and smelled the seat where the super hot girls amazing ass sat +for at least 5 minutes straight... It smelled like pure girl farts... a +strong fart essence was present in the felt padded seat cushion, I started +buggin out. I kept smelling the cushion for as long as the smell's odor +retained it's embodiment. I was in heaven with the sexy fumes that only +lasted a couple of minutes. I buried my face into the seat cushion smelling +this HOT girls candy farts. I was so happy that day. +% +For like several years I have been afflicted with a really smelly crotch. +It's like I sweat a lot down there and it just has a really sweaty vaginal +odor. I bathe regularly but nothing really helps; by the end of the day I +always smell funky. This wouldn't gross me out if it was just an occasional +problem, but it happens every day. What can I do? +% +girl you must be a sata2 hard drive because you are modestly increasing my +pipe +% +girl you must be a 0day topsite because I just wanna max out your slots +% +You should connect your graphics card directly to the mains. You can buy +molex connectors from any good electronics store and then splice it into the +lead from a hair dryer or toaster. This should deliver the correct voltage +direct to your graphics card (the molex also functions as a voltage +regulator and AC rectifier). It's the equivalent of having an Antex 3kW +power supply. +% +girl you must be haggis cause you make me want to stuff you with old meat +% +Ladies and gentlemen, against my better judgement, I allowed my teenage son +to install line-ucks on our compaq presario. Now I can't make heads or tales +of what's happening on my computer machine, and he is continously making +disrespectful remarks about Bill Gates and 'Micro$uck". I guess my only real +question is: How long should I ground him, removing all access to his +friends and activities in order to cull this anti-social behavior? +% +ONE TIME I GRABBED A FAT GOTHIC BITCH BY THE EARS AND SLAMMED HER GODDAMNED +HEAD AGAINST THE TABLE AND YELLED, "WHY ARE YOU SO GODDAMNED FAT AND UGLY?!! +WHY!!! WHY!!! WHY!!!" AND WHEN SHE STARTED TO CRY AND MADE HER WHITE CLOWN +FACE PAINT RUN AND ALL THAT THICK BLACK EYE LINER I SAID, "IF YOU ARE SO +FUCKING FAT WHY THE HELL DO YOU WEAR ALL THAT GODDAMNED SLUTY CLOTHES YOU +FAT FUCKING BITCH?!!!" +% +yo think if i got a real doll and had a voodoo priest do shit to it, and +attached lindsay lohan's soul to it, that if fucked it she'd feel it and +shit? +% +My Nazi fetish makes my boyfriend uncomfortable.I NEED ADVICE. You appear to +be experienced in these matters, so I'll give this a try.My boyfriend told +me that he finds my Irma Grese/ Ilse Koch-style Third Reich dominatrix +costumes to be disturbing; he seems reluctant to participate in Lebensborn +roleplaying and even Auschwitz guard/ male prisoner roleplaying. He also +suggested gently that I take down the Hitler Youth propaganda posters that +are currently hanging over my bed.Is Nazism a 'turnoff'? If so, why? +% +It is well known that apes are close relatives to human beings. What isn�t +so well known is just how close relatives the two species are. Apes and +humans share much of the same DNA. For instance, the North African +Short-Haired Baboon shares over 99% of its DNA with mankind. This particular +species is highly adaptable and like chimpanzees, they are able to make +crude tools and even utilize rudimentary communication skills. The +adaptability of the North African Short hair is evidenced by their lives in +captivity, while most species dwindle on extinction and have trouble +breeding; the Short-Hairs thrive, often neglecting their offspring, food +gathering, and even grooming themselves in order to mate with females. First +introduced into captivity sometime in the 1700�s, the North African +Short-Haired baboon was utilized as laborers in small farming communities. +Today, they enjoy life in urban centers, often living 10 to a den. Sadly, +captivity and inbreeding has caused their learning ability to be suppressed +and their baser instincts to be more pronounced. Often, they will rely on +the gatherings of other species to survive. Utilizing their natural +nocturnal abilities, they stalk, undetected, through the habitats of these +other species, procuring what it necessary to survive from them, often in +the form of Televisions and Hi-top sneakers. +% +Making headlines across America is the Terri Shiavo case. This poor woman is +in a persistent vegetative state and the husband selfishly wishes for her +feeding tube to be left removed. This is appalling, not to just me, but to +the many Americans that feel she should be allowed to live. +www.terrisfight.org is a prime example. The husband seems to be missing the +larger picture here, she is still biologically functional, meaning that her +vaginal orifice is capable of self-lubrication even if she is unresponsive. +This make her the perfect mate. True, she cannot perform fellatio, she is +more than capable of being a semen receptacle for the husband that has loved +her for years. Please stop this madness and contribute to her cause! +% +Today, they enjoy life in urban centers, often living 10 to a den. Sadly, +captivity and inbreeding has caused their learning ability to be suppressed +and their baser instincts to be more pronounced. Often, they will rely on +the gatherings of other species to survive. Utilizing their natural +nocturnal abilities, they stalk, undetected, through the habitats of these +other species, procuring what it necessary to survive from them, often in +the form of Televisions and Hi-top sneakers. +% +My partner and I were having intercourse when his penis came out and we +heard a weird sort of pop noise and then he experienced a lot of pain and +when he looked at his penis he noticed there was some blood coming out of +the tip. After about 5 minutes there wasn't pain anymore, but because of hte +blood I am afriad it's broken. Thoughts? +% +hey everyone remember that one time when klerck shot himself directly in the +face with a shotgun and killed himself and we all were like "whoa" and he +was like "drip drip"... that shit was awesome +% +girl you must be an internet forum because i am about to try and impress you +using my stale in jokes from 1998 +% +I need a patient guy who will realize that I am just flustered when I belt +out something stupid when I am nervous like "your such a cute little guy" on +a first date. never heard from him again, hha. whatever. +% +girl you must be a taxidermy lab because you make me want to stuff a cock in +you +% +Intel isn't bad, but AMD's is just misleading. If I'm building a 64-bit AMD +system and I look and say "Hey, it's an AMD 64 4000+! That must mean it's +4000MHz which is 4GHz" Oh no! It's only 2.4GHz. At least Intel has the sense +to put the processor speed right in the name of the chip. I know someone is +going to chime in and bring up some obscure reason why the 2.4GHz is called +the "4000+" and declare it's there for more than a marketing ploy, but Joe +Consumer isn't going to think that. An AMD-64 4000+" sounds wayyyy cooler +than an "Intel-64 2.8GHz", right?Now, proceed to mod me down because I speak +ill of the underdog, right? Go on, I know you want to inject your bias into +moderation, it's okay. +% +I, personally, have a special connection to the video "Basic Training: San +Francisco Style." It was my bridge from Fisting to Scat. There is a scene in +it where a pretty young blonde boy (who I later learned was Dave, himself) +gets fisted with a very full ass. Needless to say it gets wonderfully messy. +I was so disgusted I couldn't stop watching it. I must have nearly worn out +that spot on the tape. +% +Basically my question to you is based on everything you've seen concerning +the character of Bardock and Goku, what would happen if Goku had an actual +meeting with his father? What words would they exchange? What would cause +such a meeting, etc? It can be any continuity you choose. Now that you know +what to write about, be creative and come up with what in your view would +happen if father and son were to meet. +% +girl, you must be an einstein-rosen bridge because i'd like to come inside +of you and then be somewhere else +% +I'm all about girls who have dicks coming out of their nipples with dicks +also coming out of those dicks and shit coming out of those dicks +% +YOU SPICAROONIS HAVE A WHOLE DAMN COUNTRY SO WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU WANT WITH +OURS? ONCE YOU FILTHY FUCKS FINISH YOUR SILENT INVASION DO YOU THINK THIS +WILL STILL BE THE AMERICA IT ONCE WAS? FUCK NO. YOU FILTHY BEANERS WILL TURN +IT INTO ONE BIG FUCKING BARRIO LIKE YOU HAVE DONE TO THAT PIECE OF SHIT +MEXICO BECAUSE YOU BEAN EATERS ARE TOO FUCKING STUPID TO RUN A FUCKING +COUNTRY.YOU BEANERS TOOK OVER CALIFORNIA AND TEXAS. AND WE FUCKING GAVE YOU +NEW MEXICO. SO KEEP YOUR FILTHY ASSES THERE AND JUST HAVE THAT SHIT AND STAY +THE FUCK OUT OF THE REST OF THE COUNTRY. YOU HAVE YOUR WHOLE SO CALLED +COUNTRY DOWN THERE AND THREE BIG FUCKING STATES. BUT YOU FUCKERS REPRODUCE +FASTER THAN RABBITS AND HAVE MORE DAMN RELATIVES THAN A COCKROACH. AND ARE +TWICE AS FILTHY. SO I GUESS YOU NEED MORE ROOM. SHIT YOU PACK 50 OF YOU +BEANERS INTO A 2 BEDROOM APARTMENT SO YOU SHOULD BE ABLE TO MAKE DO WITH +THOSE FUCKING STATES.DAMN I HATE TACO MUNCHERS. +% +When you see porn and your dick gets hard, try to touch your dick head with +your lips. I have licked many times my cockhead in this way. +% +Hey guys, if a Jedi perchance met the Wolverine in armed combat, who do you +think would win? Could Wolverine's mind resist the Force? Could the Jedi's +lightsaber cut through Adamantium? Discuss. +% +i think i may have roids but i don't know what they look like and i don't +have anything protruding out of my ass. everytime i go poop there is a +little blood on the toilet paper when i wipe. its not super painful and +pretty much feels like minor irritation. my buttcrack has been really dry +and flaky too almost like my crack wants to get deeper. wtf? i've been using +preperation h suppositories and the medicated pads for weeks now but nothing +has helped. i don't have money or insurance to see a doctor so if anyone has +had symptoms like this plz tell me what the hell is wrong with me and what i +can do to fix this. thx. +% +A romantic dinner with a large table cloth so you can go under the table in +the retaurant and blow me without the other customers seeing what you are +doing. Not that i am ashamed but I am just thinking of your dignity and all. +% +I'd like to get her on a bed, rip off her pants and her grannie underwear +that I just know she wears and then I'd like to flip her over and spread +those fat smelly cheeks apart, shove peanut butter in her bunghole, stick my +tongue in there and move it around like I am having an epileptic fit eating +the creamy treat from her ass. I'd also like to choke her by shoving my +schlong down her throat to the point where she is gonna pass out and then +pull out my cock and jerk off on her face while she is still delerious and +then squirt all over her cute face. +% +Not following the chat room rules will at the least get you a reprimand or, +at the worst, kicked or removed from the chat room. The Operators are here +to assist and make sure the chat room is a fun and friendly place to visit. +Channel Operators are not guards, but they take their jobs seriously. In the +event of unacceptable or disruptive behavior, you will be asked to leave the +room. +% +it's time for lunch. you'd like to chow. Fraid I've got some bad news right +now. The fridge a box of empty space, no sign of eats, not e'en a trace, oh +how you'd like a tiny taste, your stomach hurts, you find some Certs, +they're gobbled, gone, but breath is fresh, you're nearing death, you're +flailing on the kitchen floor, no more! just make the hunger leave, your +stomach grieves a SNACK you NEED you've GOT TO FEED YOUR CHEETOS ARE ALL +GONE OH GOD YOU'RE SORTING THROUGH THE TRASH: A WAD! USED PAPER NAPKINS +QUICK, YOU LICK! DELISH but what a TEASE just PLEASE I need some CHIPS you +weakly WHEEZE try empty KETCHUPs upside DOWN you LICK THE CRUMBS right off +the GROUND it's LUNCH LUNCH LUNCH and YOU MUST CHOW the trickling sweat +drops off your BROW from FRIDGE to SINK you madly DASH where did you hide +that CHEETO STASH O! during LAST WEEK's ENterPRISE you ATE THOSE CHEETOS not +so WISE so AS A DESPERATE LAST RESORT you GNAW your left hand's ugly WART +the TASTY FLAKES of DEAD DRY SKIN have turned this LOSS into a WIN but +STOMACH LETS his anGER KNOWN it GRUMBLES IN AN ANGRY TONE a FAT GEEK HUNGRY +ALL ALONE--HELP HELP THE FOOD ! THERE IS NONE HERE! EMPTY BOTTLES OF +CHEAP-ASS BEER YOU WRITHE ALONG THE GROUND AND FLOP! RELEASE THOSE BOWELS +WITH A *PLOP* oh GROSS YOU SMOOSH the TURDS so WARM and with a FBLURT out +trickles MORE but crazed you are. in NEED OF EAT you reach and get some +BROWN POO-MEAT. YOUR SHIT ALL OVER HANDS AND FACE YOUR TONGUE AFLAME WITH +POOPY TASTE the DOOR swings WIDE: NERD FRIENDS, a BUNCH "Hey, Asimov! WE +BROUGHT YOU LUNCH :O" +% +your mom is so fat that if planck's constant were 1 Js, she STILL wouldn't +be able to quantum tunnel through a potential of any significance +% +i had a great time last night. thanks for tying me up with carpenters rope +around my mantits and through the crack of my asshole and then facefucking +me while pouring candle wax all over my areolas, your spiked-toe boots +digging into my side while i am on all fours, back arched like a frightened +cat, begging for mercy as the thick bands of the rope run back and forth +teasing my grundel and burning my semen-encrusted pubic hairs, the smell so +engulfing i vomited all over your bed and then you vomited all over me and +then i shit myself and the rope made it split into two streams all over your +knees, running down to your ankles and toenails. i'd love to do it thursday +night again! +% +You give liberals a bad name. You give women a bad name. You give fucking +everyone who has the title "HUMAN BEING" a bad name.Go outside once in a +while and stop stuffing your bloated mouth with stale cheetos and flat +mountain dew. You might feel sexy in that thong but that thick and musty +smell wafting up your crotch proves that the best thing you could do for +your sex appeal is to do your laundry, and maybe take a damn bath.Tap, tap, +tap, your keyboard receives your idle, insipid wanderings. People care! you +tell yourself. Just look at your comments. There...are a few of them. +Proving that someone reads your drivel even when you post 5 pathetic little +vignettes about a tediously pedestrian life in a single day.teh_enchantress. +A pleasingly clever mixture of an internet in-joke and fantasy archetype? Or +a slavish parroting of the same tired memes that lonely boys and girls use +to try to find a place on an internet that refuses no one, least of all +pedophiles and hate groups?I know, I know. It's something to do when you get +to your room. YOu know, after a long trip to the bathroom, or having lunch +with your mom, or going out with your other fat friends. You can come back +to your computer and rant about how outrageous your recent bland adventures +were.Well, do yourself and the world a favor. Shut the fuck up forever, you +wanna-be slut. Your opinions aren't worth listening to, your life isn't +interesting, you aren't attractive. Live some of life and meet some human +beings. You're a social bulemic and you've been binging on the paper thin +personas of your internet friends, most of whom are probably overweight +engineers working at IBM in sexually frustrating marraiges.You think you'll +look back on this time of your life and laugh? I dare say you'll look back +and your lips will become a thin bloodless line as you realize what a +fucking waste it was. The relationships you could have had. The friends you +thought you made.And please avoid any real issues. Your understanding of any +political or social problems in the world is about as thick as your hymen +after you popped your cherry with a hello kitty dildo you bought while +tittering on instant messenger with your friends. Wau~~~ so cute. You +fucking shallow little wretch.In short, you are a female piece of refuse. +The cigarette butt that your parents smoked for the love they thought you +could give them, and then had stamped out as soon as they realized what a +piece of shit had erupted from your mother's vagina, which happens to be +rather overly-familiar in your neighborhood. Just shut the fuck up. Get out +of that goddamn chair in which you've spent so many needless hours.I +guarantee that unless you do something drastic, you should acknowledge that +this is truly as good as it will ever get. Because from this point on you'll +begin to realize the gossamer nature of any joy you might have thought you +were feeling--and that infintely deep well of loneliness will erupt so +sharply it'll cut your wrists.No, you're not complex. You're not deep and +you're not thoughtful. The pain torturing you isn't inscrutable and your +problems are not unresolvable. You're just stupider than you think, and that +will always frustrate you. You know you're not attractive, but your tenuous +grip on self-worth demands a lie. And your decrepit social life has the +prospects of a bumblebee in a Scandinavian September.Good luck doing the +unlikely. Some steps to help you on the way: plan your diet, start working +out, find a hobby, and read the newspaper. That is all. +% +Now go back to what you do best, which is apparently poking your nose into +others business because you're too bored with your own life. *pets joo* +% +We're the math nerds. Uh huh, that's us. Our glasses are thick; our skin +bleeding pus. Chalkboards are out and computers are in... Mathmatica, dude! +WTF have you been? We're crunching some primes while chatting on forums; +Star Trek and Star wars; the Great Pauly Shore--Um, this math problem's +simple to solve, can't you see? You need to brush up on your pi, roots, and +e. +% +The nigger is a subhuman monkey, ape, Fat lips, kinky hair, VIOLENT, RAPIST, +SMALL BRAIN (have you noticed how dumm most niggers are)and broad monstrous +noses, car jacking saucer-lipped, ignorant fecal colored, ghetto-living, +welfare-leeching, crack-smoking, hub-cap stealing. fried-chicken and biscuit +eating, watermelon-stealing, 6-yr-old-white-girl-shooting, serial-killing, +rapist, robber, murderer, adulterer, liar, fat-assed, white-woman-wanting, +loud-radio-at-2:00-a.m.-in-the-morning-playing, undisciplined, +tree-swinging, flat-congo-nosed, greasy afro-sheen, baggy-pants, and +side-ways cap-wearing, maya angelou-reading, Jesse Jackson-worshiping, Al +Sharpton, Louis Farrakhan and Malcum X-believing, disco doo-wop playing, +non-athletic, non-musical, shoplifting, non-political, trashy, nasty, +filthy, junk-around-the-house and litter-in-the-yard-keeping, incestuous, +hoe-beating, unfaithful, dice-shooting, numbers-playing, lottery-wishing, +roach-and-rat raising, lice-keeping, crab-farming, graffiti-tagging, +gang-banging, drive-by shooting, corner-hanging, unemployed, VCR, +television, and radio-pawning, cardboard-box-under the-bridge-living, +pork-rib three times-a-day-eating, buck-toothed, knock-kneed, semi-bald, +illiterate, cross-eyed, get-it-up-so-you-can-masturbate-to-gay-porn, +viagra-taking, connection-frequenting, jungle-visiting, cock-kissing +AfroInfectedDickSucking, spawn of a fat, greasy, nasty, sweaty, unwashed +slutty bitch whore that should never be trusted or allowed to free range in +Human areas. +% +Would you leave an otherwise perfect relationship if you found out your +partner was interested in children sexually? +% +There was this one time when I was so constipated from lack of proper diet +and opiate abuse that I strained so hard I passed out and hit my head on the +bathtub. I guess my bowels released when I was unconscious because I was +awakened by my dog licking a mixture of blood and feces from my swollen and +prolapsed rectum. To this day the muscles are so atrophied that I must wear +a special harness to keep my bowels from spilling into my rubber underwear. +% +WELCUM TO MY CHANNEL ON MIRC. READ DA RULES.TXT OR FACE A CONSEUQENCE!! +RATIO FTPz ONLY 0DAY 0HOUR 0LAMENIZ. DOWNLOADIN FILES OF DA INTANET. SUME1 +SEND ME A KEEJEN FOR DIS PROGGIEZ. ANYONE WANT TO SHAR PUBZ?????????? my +brother raped me when i was 6 +% +Does anyone else find it ironic that, as your virtual character gains +experience, wealth and social stature, your reality character is losing the +exact same things at the same rate? +% +The night begins, so sets the sun, but chatting now has just begun. T'will +yet be hours ere I am done, for I'm the chat world's favorite son. Although +by day I am made fun (they say that I weigh nigh a ton, they say ten feet I +cannot run), sour regrets; I have yet none. They may laugh and they may +shun, but words cannot match my shotgun; as fast and far as they may run, +I'll pick them all off one by one. +% +Fuck my ass 'till my ass is filled. Thrust that cock up to the hilt. Ours is +the house that Shepard built; all cocks hard and none shall wilt! Splatter +your jizz all over my face. Rub it on in like grade school paste. To my ass +your cock has laid waste; Mom still thinks that I am chaste ;) +% +Blog People (or their subclass who are interested in computers and the +glorification of information) have a fanatical belief in the transforming +power of digitization and a consequent horror of, and contempt for, heretics +who do not share that belief. Given the quality of the writing in the blogs +I have seen, I doubt that many of the Blog People are in the habit of +sustained reading of complex texts. It is entirely possible that their +intellectual needs are met by an accumulation of random facts and paragraphs. +% +they call me the King, of downloading THings, got bandwidth like no one on +Earth. My modems are hot, but the warez I got, adds to my collecting-stuff +mirth. I can't burn enough, CD's that are stuffed, with rars, zips, and +tars of all kinds, but I must be strong, download all night long, ignore +telltale OCD signs. +% +Guys, what I don't get about plane crashes and falling elevator deaths is: +why don't the victims just time it so that they jump straight up in the air +right before the plane hits the ground? The jump would be a little high, +yes, and you might break your ankle or even your leg, but isn't that better +than getting smashed to smithereens? +% +Me and my buddy were in downtown chicago and were walking to where he dad +works and we came across this bum in the walkway. All fucking sprawled out +across the sidewalk like it was his. My buddy pushed him with his foot and a +couple 40 oz'ers rolled out from underneath him. Fucking lazy ass bum so I +kicked him in the gut as hard as I could and he started puking up beer, +corn, and something that looked like it came outta some gay dudes ass. Some +security guard saw us and tried to chase us down but we were gone. Then I +went to see my dad and go to GOLDS GYM to bench press!!!!! +% +I like to show off that I freeball. I love to have my pants just so so I +show major butt crack also when I am at a urinal at a rest stop or sport +event I unzip and unbutton my shorts so that when I am pissing the shorts +drop down and everyone can see my bare ass! I love the feeling of guys +knowing i freeball. what do you guys do to show off? +% +girl u must be grouphug.us because i would make up any ridiculous story just +2 be on u +% +Seriously, I have the greatest respect for blacks. One of my best friends is +African-American. These people put up with so much hardship, just like +sufferers of Down's syndrome and mongoloidism. I'm just so proud they've +earned their place in American society. +% +why would I want to participate in your lousy conversation, you demagogue +clown. i find no interest in you. you used to be a good friend of mine, and +but you turned your back on me. you stabbed me right in the heart. the court +has found you guilty. you have been sentenced to death. +% +oh yeah you're such a dirty girl arent you year girl why dont you jack off +daddy yeah take daddy's hard cock in your tiny little doll hands oh yeah +that feels so good now jerk daddy's cock off back and forth you little whore +oh yeah +% +ur a very ugly jew thats thinks ur all that .. hope ur reading this cause u +look like a fukin whore with that nazty ass makeup... U fukin peice of shit +i hope ur dad rapes u till u cant move a muscle ... wat are u 14 and ur dads +like 60... ur parents sure like to get it on ...Blink Blink...I hope u and +ur jappy ass girl friends and boy friends die in hell where they will meet +hitler and have some fun with him in bed .. if u kn ow what i mean +% +Pudge Picnic : chubs on chubs with flab to spare. "No condoms!" yelled, +but we don't care! Dude's be fucken, dudes be fucked, dudes be shittin, +dudes be sucked. Writhing on the concrete floor, these chubs are sluts. +They're obese whores! And gross! They've never taken baths. Too much +chili! Awful gas!!! +% +PENIS in BUTT. SPERM mixed FECES. FASTEN your SILVER COCK to my GOLDEN +HOLE. My STOOL is the SATIN SHEET for your VISITING HARD-ON. Ejaculate +RAPIDLY and REPEATEDLY on my BACK and ANKLES. DELICIOUS. +% +a little squirt of doody came out when I was picking up that heavy jug of +milk, when i took of my spideyman underoos to check it out there were little +squiggly things in it.. they were moving : ( +% +Holy lord you are being duped. Napster is really run by the MPAA and when +you download the music it tracks you on a FEDERAL GOVERNMENT server and it +begins to hack ur toonz. Then the service goes under and the files self +destruct leaving your HDD as a pile of googabits. Cant you FOOLS see that +this is just a plan to get you to JERK your DUMB NUTS while wearing ASSLESS +CHAPS so that the MPAA hax ur data and enters ur base to kill ur doodz. If I +see anyone using CRAPster or iCOONS i'll be sure to beat their head in using +my engorged dong for their own safety ohh yeah. +% +I cut myself because I find it an artform, just like tattoo's, but I LIKE +cutting a beautiful drawing into myself, as I did it and I drew it. But I +did cut along time ago so, that might be it. Anyway, I only cut when it +fades and needs touching up, but it sure feels good! +% +Sometimes I cut my penis when I get depressed...Unfortunatly, I managed to +half-circumsize myself last night, after I got incredibly depressed about my +girlfriend leaving me. I was devastated. +% +In all the outcry against them, too many people are forgetting the +contributions pedophile catholic clergymen have made to our society. Did you +know that the term "Joshing" someone, meaning to kid actually comes from +Joshua Fairbanks, an altar boy famous for believing Father Jacob Cooper's +laughable claim that he could perform the miracle of transubstantiation if +Joshua allowed him to ejaculate in the boy's mouth. ohh yeah +% +Shut the fuck up, you fucking hippy. No one cares about the fact that you +don't own a TV or think TV is only for idiots, or whatever other attitude +your elitist comment is about. Take it to the coffee shop, asshole. +% +Dr. Huxtable broke into the clinic and held me at gunpoint. I was his +patient, in for my yearly pap smear. I couldn't believe it when he came in +the door for the exam with a machete in his hands. He demanded that I take +off my clothes, and begin to fellate him. He waved the machete around like a +madman, so i complied. I was forced, at knife point, to take his entire +penis into my mouth. Then I rubbed my clit and got off ohh yeah +% +Dude's fucking dudes. Everybody on the floor. No condoms No condoms! +% +yo what drugs u into? im all about the opiumnitrous / dxm / ketamine / acid +/ weed / hydrocodone / ultram / oxy / demerol / morphine / codeine / +dihydrocodeine / heroin / mdma / salvia / 5-meo-dipt / 5-meo-amt / amt / +rohypnol / ghb / mda / hash / kavakava / adderall / dexedrine / ritalin / +ephedrine / caffeine / alcohol / cocaine / shrooms / tobacco / xanax / +klonopin / valium / ambien / soma / flexeril / zanaflex / zoloft / paxil / +ether / spraypaint / phenobarbital / ativan / air duster +% +girl you must be alan greenspan because you have just raised my interest +rate by several percentage points +% +wiggle thatass.pop a tab and smoke a fatty. happy everyday until we crash at +your dads. boom tisk in our ears and amphetamines in our blood.giving +blowjobs in the stalls to pay for $10 water.this moment will last +forever.mom and dad broke up because of me +% +Again and again and again, I grow weary of junior high school English +teachers trying to correct people's speech only because they encounter +language forms they aren't familiar with. For the love of Mary, face it! +Your English is only good enough to teach the average Mexican or Cambodian +refugee to put together three-syllable words into coherent sentences used to +beg for money, alcohol, drugs or shelter. Stop pretending you know English +better than God and everyone else. Comprehend that the mere fact you were +teaching English in the first place means that you weren't smart enough to +do anything more productive and therefor your language skills are firmly +confined to the mediocre. STFU. +% +These goddamn trolls interrupting my flow. These niggas don't respek us with +a +o. They gotta color spam and fake invite, bombing with asciis in yellow +on white. Shit yeah. it's bright, you 12 year old kiddie. You ain't got +pubes and you ain't seen titty. I'll jupe your chans and ban your ass. +Don't message me with plz unban, your chance has passed! Other opers +crappin up our relay net. Why haven't you delinked your 386 yet? ircd needs +xeons and dual cpus. When it comes to irc hardware, you can't be a jew. +Shit, nobody knows the trouble I've seen. On invites for websites with +naked teens. Begs for ops and packet attacks. Shit from users who use vi, +not emacs. Another long day of patrolling the IRC. Eating my doritos, and +having a jerk, I chat with TheWalrus and #nanog faggots. All this niggas +do is complain "the lag it's-- bad, chat is slow, and we're getting +harassed." Shit, trolls, this k-line is your last. Once more and it's "G" +and you're gone for good. Banned from the internet chatting neighbourhood. + It's lonely at the top. Just me and CHANFIX. Day in and day out. Banning +trolls with my linux. We give safe harbor to chatters world wide. From +pedophiles to hacker thieves. Yeah, I won't lie: IRC is a cesspool of +e-misfits. EazyCheezes and bagel-cutters like that nigga BitS. But at +least we're the best. Disagree and you're gone. BRB, mom just told me +gotta mow the lawn. +% +but dont 4get 2 take ur pills ok GUY'S dumb bastards.....LMFAO..and yes i +can spell un like u DUMB-EEESSSS .and i like caps 2 +% +I enjoy black butts, butts in my face, butts which haven't been wiped, black +dongs in my rectum, big sweaty black balls in my mouth, thick black dongs +slapped across my face. I enjoy pressing my face into asses and sniffing +them. I can take 2 cocks in my asshole and 3 in my mouth. I lick cocks and +butts. I shake my ass in front of people's face before they fuck it hard. I +wear a cock ring and enjoy letting people chain me up and piss on me. +% +i'm going to jump through my screen and through the internet and into your +face +% +im gonna lift you with a forklift so high you'll beg to come down +% +Hey website administrator, suck my motherfuckin' dick, you shit-lickin' +asswipe. You probably fuck your mother up the asshole, don't you? What a +little, wet, wimpering vagina you are! P.S. Herbert Mantooth, you are the +love of my life and I want to ram my shit-covered cock up your juicy +rump-hole and then suck your balls raw, you big-city bad-boy bitchass +buttfuck!!! Then I want to piss in your ass... +% +I'm so sick of all this "digital" vs analog crap. Guys, if you ANAL-logue +people want "Warmth" just mix white noise into the sound file, or use shitty +cables. That's what you're paying $5000 a preamp for, suckers! +% +i heard some wolves dig up natural cannabis plants and get thc in their +paws, but i never thought it was true until a wolf was hit by a car in front +of my house! i smoked the paws and was six different kinds of fucked up +% +Dumb Dongs, Dumb Dongs, Why Have You Left Me. How I miss those long nights, +when you raped me so deftly! As the rain pitter pattered the shanty's metal +roof, and my back felt the sting of your biting tooth. a single tear down my +cheek, the pleasure of pain. Dumb dongs, won't you come back again? Again, +I pray...please, to me! Dumb dongs is what I want to see! And if you'll +never come back to nest, I can't be blamed for what comes next. Now I +furiously scrape my Mach3, on my wrists for from life I flee. My skin +getting all irritated, but I fear my dumb-dongless death is fated. Dumb +Dongs, we had good times, and we had bad. From that first fondle when I was +a lad...to teenage cockparties where semen was drunk. But I'm left with no +Dongs and I'm utterly sunked. Dumb Dongs, au revoir, my lovely stiff pal. +Fuck this suicide shit. I'll jus t fuck gals. +% +DING DONG WONG GOT A RAP FOR MY CLOWNZ IM FAT AND UGLY; DEY PULL MY PANTS +DOWNZ AT SCHOOL, AND ITS CRUEL AND DEY TINKS DEY IS COOL BUT NIGGAZ GONNA +GET WHOOPED LIKE A NON-CLOWNY FOOL WHAT WHAT DONT MESS WITH JUGGALO DUDES +OR ELSE WE WILL SIT ON YOU AND YOULL BE DOG FOODZ IT'S NOT THAT IM FAT--MOM +SAYS MY BONES' BIG SHUT DA FOOQ UP BEFORE I SPLITZ YA WIG FOOdongs +% +Now, what do you kids expect from an operating system coded by a man named +Linus. You expect complete compatibility? He always has to carry a blanket +with him wherever he goes, and asks Charlie Brown (hes a clown!) for help. +He's supposed to be the saviour of the computing world? I'll put my money +and my computer in good hands with Bill Gates and Microsoft. Because even in +this review, you have to make reference to Windows XP, proving your +inferiority complex. Good day. +% +The Fart Fantasy: Expel your gas, I deeply inhale. The fresh fart from an +athletic male. Ohhh yes it's good, sweet and pungent. An aromatic fecal +luncheon! with delicate bouquet and wispy taste, this fart's among the best +I've faced. Your nose wrinkled in abject disgust? Oh no, it's good. Try +it--you must! Farts are nature's true delight. If you want some, theres no +need to fight! Form a line right at my ass. Just wait for me to pass that +gas. Your taste buds exploding, flavor extreme. I dont know about you, but +it makes me cream. My pants that is, spurting now. Theres only one proper +response - WOW. +% +OMG U WILL NOT GET THE TRANSIENT DAMPENING U NEED U MIGHT AS WELL UZE UR +RADIO SHAK EARFONES 2 MIC UR DRUM KIT WHICH IS MADE FROM 5 GALLON BUCKETS +WHILE PLAYING UR MILK CARTON UKELELE AND INSTEAD OF RECORDING IT JUST HAVE +SOME GUY PROMISE TO TRY REALLY HARD TO REMEMBER WHAT IT SOUNDED LIKE SO HE +CAN TELL EVERYONE LATER +% +i gobbled up turds. Yes. it was me!! I creeped into the mens room of my +local mcd's. Murder is wrong, and sodomy's a sin, but there ain't nothin +wrong with this shit eating grin. Shit eating grin! Shit eating grin. I'm +a fecal feasting faggot, always have been. Shit eating grin! Shit eating +grin! Well hey you guys, what's happenin? :) +% +Folks, as we reflect on this massive tragedy, it behooves us to consider +another giant wave sweeping the globe killing indiscriminantly, a wave of +zionist oppresion. We need to divert funds away from this piddling natural +disaster to fight the REAL threat: the Jewnami +% +the only reason they are fighting for the marriage thing is just to bitch +about something, if they get the right to marry theyll bitch about something +else nothings good enough for homosexuals and various forms of coloreds. not +only do they have forced equality but they have extra benifits and weak +minded people tiptoeing around them trying to be PC. and then they try to +force beliefs onto people. its ok for them to disagree and feel and think +what they want, but then they try to enact various forceful tactics on +people who are equally but oppositely off the norm as they are, such as +racists. they have just as much right to feel the way that they do as a +homosexual does to feel the way they do. marraige is not a civil right, but +the ability to hate something is +% +Anime characters gone wild. Non stop hardcore erotic anime moments captured +on film, Shockingly hot steamy scenes of famous anime characters exploring +wild sexual fantasies. Warning: Anime Fiction contains explicit raunchy +content (yeah baby!) and is definitely not suitable for a candlelit romantic +evening with a loved one, unless you both like watching anime characters get +it on! +% +why dont you linux users just shove all this open source bullshit up your +own ass. no one cares about compiling or configuring or any of the bullshit +you constantly jack off about. we normal people just care about chatting +and sending email to our friends and viewing the www so please shut the fuck +up about foxfire or whatever the fuck tangent you're going off on. thanks +for reading this. dongs. +% +Chat. Chat. Till the sun is gone. Chat till your eyes sag and your cheeks +are wan. Quickly sip that fizzing mountain dew. Pop a few cheetos in your +mouth and chew. Pimply fat nerdlings huddled on the puter. #Chatterz: +Final Destination for those without a future. +% +The Flu Fuck: blow that snot into your hand. wipe it on your tongue oh man. + crunchy crunch, the boogers go. Gulp! you swallow. Down they go. Uh-uh-uh +here comes sneeze. Achoo! You're bent, hands on your knees. A prodding's +felt, betwixt your cheeks. What the heck? It's a linux geek With cock +unfurl'd, he rips your pants. Nothing can stop this fag's advance. In it +goes, his cock doth plunge. Your memory will never ever expunge: this +terrible memory of assrape uncouth. Why didn't he wait? Only 10 feet from +glory hole booth +% +It's about time I told the truth. The reason I don't like gays is that when +I was in the navy I had several homosexual experiences and so i know what +faggots get up to is the devils work. This black guy in my dorm used to make +me suck his dick and then he'd pump my ass full of his vile semen and there +was nothing I could do about it. The shit eating faggot had me trapped there +for months at sea so I had to suck his rancid sambo dick until we got back +to port. That's why faggots will burn in a lake of fire and why I now have +to wear a colostomy bag. +% +MTV is responsible for brainwashing the youth into thinking that niggers are +gods and that rap is music! The garbage that they pump into kids heads +should be punishable by death via anal electrocution! And has anyone seen +the advertisement for the video game called grand theft auto-san andreas? +Isn't that special? A game that glorifies niggers selling crack and running +the streets with rocket launchers, shooting at cops and speaking ebonics! +God I hate niggers so much I can taste blood! +% +Perhaps the hottest thing to do with Ashlee Simpson would be to +(consensually) punch her in the face as hard as possible, busting her nose +and lip, licking her bloody face all over, sticking your tongue down her +throat and swapping blood and saliva for hours whilst playing with her raven +hair and rubbing your hard-on against her thigh and crotch. +% +I can't yawn loud enough. Every person has met you. The "crazy guy" who +comes up with half-inspired shit. +% +TAKE THE RED PILLTAKE THE BLUE PILLTAKE THE RED PILLTAKE THE BLUE PILLTAKE +THE RED PILLTAKE THE BLUE PILLTAKE THE RED PILLTAKE THE BLUE PILLTAKE THE +RED PILLTAKE THE BLUE PILLTAKE THE RED PILLTAKE THE BLUE PILLTAKE THE RED +PILLTAKE THE BLUE PILLTAKE THE RED PILLTAKE THE BLUE PILLTAKE THE RED PILL +% +hahahah shit face, yes i'm so jealous of you!!! i wish i was some ugly ass +kid who lived his entire flaccid existence for the joy getting hits on some +internet forum. it must be better than getting hits to the face that your +alcoholic step father gives you, right? you fucking piece of miserable shit. +i feel sorry for your shit parents. +% +Still dialing 911 for emergency police services? If you're like many people +in the New York area, these simple numbers can be a painful reminder of +loved ones lost in the terrible tragedy of September 11, 2001. +% +Trolls of trolls. You don't get this. We make jokes that you're sure to +miss. LOL at LOL, Rolling on the floor. Laughing or Crying? You ass-ruined +whore. This troll's so meta you choked on a chip. Too much ranch dressing, +you slant-eyed nip. Go back to Everquest and pretend you're a girl. We're +the royalty of trolls. Kings, dukes and earls. +% +For those of you who dont know: The south beach diet consists of eating the +moist turds from the discarded bathing suits abandoned at the beach. +% +People, am I the only one who realizes that binary packages are almost +useless? Except a few basic packages (as in USE independent, e.g. gcc), the +result depends greatly by the USE variable. Let's take for example the +mod_php package. How useful a binary mod_php will be? +% +buddy, if you were a girl i would take u out to a nice steak dinner (w/ +plenty of steak fries) and a movie (has to be matinee tho) +% +hi my names jimmy and im 13 and the other day i was playing with myself +while watching showcase and i realised i couldnt quite reach my fireman with +my mouth. so what i did was i took a small straw and shoved it down my +urethra. and i started to blow really hard.. now i have a small bubble like +figure on the side of my fireman.. could this be from blowing into the +straw??? +% +Algebra is the class today. All these numbers are making me gay. Square root +of this, cosine of that. Goddamn the math teacher is fat. Equations and +proofs, I can't take any more. She might be fat, but hey : She's a whore. +I'll calculate the angle to ruin her cunt. Drive in my protractor, for a +calculator I hunt. Need to calculate this math bitch's weight. Oh fuck I've +been crushed ; too late. +% +Uhm, excusez-moi, but as a regular on the richest channel on EFnet, I think +I have the authority to deem you a pusillanimous troll. Go back to dipping +your stale cheetos in your ramen, you white trash +too-poor-to-afford-neutrogena too-stupid-to-know-Biore-is-better pizza-faced +nerd. I'm going to go ejaculate into a fresh silk scarf, hand made by a Thai +company in which my father has a controlling interest. I'm just glad your +inane blather only took a small portion of my glorious 30" Apple LCD. +% +I also like to eat poop. One time my girlfriend came over and i just ate her +poop. She got very very angry wehen i tried to kiss her she like said " you +are the sickest person in the world you sick fuck" then i said what you +don't like to eat poop. I mean i don't see the big deal i mean i have been +doing it since i was a kid. I nevver had any friends because i would always +eat there poop after they pooped it out. Since i never had any friends I +just made friends with my poop. I would make racecars out of my poop and +burn my penis with cigar buds. I think you should just live with it +% +fuck with me and i'll instant message you with text size 25 +% +I flogged my engorged penis in a manic phase. My scrotum, hairless and taut, +basked in warm rays. Glistening with sweat, Oh how it did shine. The helmet +of a gladiator from olden time. Two bronzed eggs, such a glorious sight. A +symbol of manhood and all that is right. You may choose to snicker or call +me queer. Make no mistake; I don�t take it in the rear. +% +Look here "dad", the thing you need to understand about your daughter is +that she WANTS to be raped. She LIKES it. Look at the way she dresses! If +she wanted to be left alone she would wear the burqa allah so wisely +dictates. Instead she dresses like a western harlot, she desires to be +beaten and raped like all sluts of the west. If you were a better father to +her, this wouldn't have happened but that was then, and this is now, and I'm +not going to let you stand in the way of her happiness any longer. If you +want to get untied any time soon, I suggest you quit screaming and let me do +what must be done in peace. +% +You wouldn't think it to look at me, but I am a serious badass and I will +mess you up if you so much as look at me funny. A lot of people were +executed last year in this state for that deadliest of crimes: Fucking with +me. So step back off of my IRC channel if you know what's good for you, +BITCH. +% +Earlier today, while talking to a client about her policy, I accidentally +said "I'm pro rape" instead of "I'll pro-rate your account". She tried to +ignore the slip up, unfortunately I complicated matters by gagging her with +my necktie and repeatedly raping her. Sometimes I think I must not care +about Geico shareholder value at all. +% +I cant believe this. I bought this Radeon X800XT and I'm only getting 70 FPS +in the latest action game. The manufacturer's drivers are shit, and the +programming for the game is sub-standard. I spend my good money, and I +demand 72 FPS for my entertainment pleasure. I will attempt registry hacks, +extreme overclocking/cooling and DLL replacement to achieve the necessary +result, but if I am not successful, this game is the worst in history and +should be consigned to your recycle bin. Good day. +% +This fucking faggot just pisses me off becuz he and I were internet dating +and he broke up with me for some other fuckin newbie. Ima tell you what +don't internet date him cuz he cheats on you and he is mean. Im going to +hack him soon and hes going to wish he never met me that fuckin faggot. +% +Insane Clown Posse MegaRap - We're da Insane Clown Posse. We're overweight +and bossy. Oh shit you gotta know what's up. To be hardcore you need +make-up. Closet faggots all are we. Fiddle my balls and my pee-pee. Insane +Clown Posse? More like Loony Queer Gang. One dude who's more attractive than +us: Shredder's pal Krang. We're weird and we're angry and we don't conform +at all. Of course we've never faught before, we'd run from any brawl. You +coward! You goddamn pussy. Can't you handle us? It's not our fault cheetos +taste good and we've got ample guts. Raw raw, I'm Violent J and I play the +trombone. I march in the school marching band; I've got a loving home. My +life sucks bad and I kill cops and shit on toilet seats. I curled my hair +and did my face and now I'm selling beats. For legions of you fat-assed +fucks think I'm the coolest thing. But all I do is amplify my farts and +yelling, sing. In secret I buy Eminem to study up his rhymes. but I don't +get it, how he does, I cry to Mom and whine. My favorite sport is Ninja and +I always dress in black. It looks a little awkward in gym class when I run +track. I never bring the proper clothes--of changing I am scared. What if +the jocks see how my tighty-whities are all teared? I only wear one pair, +of course. For more would be a waste. And after a long day, well, I just +LOVE it how they taste. That sour sweet of sweat and shit forever on my +lips. It's not my fault if briefs well used will in time, rip. Wash my +clothes, you dare suggest? Hygiene's invoked my ire. I scrub myself with +oil from a pack of Oscar Meyers. Dead people, gore and blood. It's shocking +is it not? Check it out, my older brother might get me some pot. Once my +dad gave me some beer and yes, I took a sip. Let me say, it's good! I +couldn't even handle it. And tuesday after school my friend named Mike +gave me a cig! But I was scared of smoke-caused cancer. Maybe when I'm +big... Instead I wrestle with my pals in first or second grade. I want to +beat those little punks, but in truth, well, I'm afraid. They pin me down +and kick me in the head so violently, and when I lay, a sobbing heap, they +squat on me and pee. Juggy Juggy Juggalo two four six. This is Linkin Park +produced exclusively by hicks. I'm the terror from Vermont, the danger +state with trees. Yeah, I'm from the cuts. It's practically LBC. I'm good +at mathematics but I don't like history. but more than doing homework I read +Nancy Drew myst'ries. So you see it doesn't get any more hardcore than this +clown. You better watch yourself or--OOPs O shit! I just made brown. I +don't have such a good control of muscles in my rear. Just one drawback of +being an HIV plus queer. Sometimes Dad dresses like Gandalf, does me up as +Frodo. My mom watches--she kind of looks like hunchback Quasimodo. The +ring of power tween my cheeks; his middle in my earth, his burly arms fast +wrapped around my rarely-cleansed girth. I try to tell my teachers of my +plight, my awful tale. But when I get to Frodo: "Holy shit I DO NOT CARE." +A juggalo cannot exist if Daddy is a-rapin. But in truth, you get to like +it so there's no escapin'. What's it matter that my songs completely lack a +tune? My customers are tone-deaf pusillanimous poltroons. They listen in +the desperate wish that they'll become less nerdy. "I can't go to parties," +they say. Bed time is seven thirty. Rebel they will, alone in a bedroom +with door a-signed. "No girls allowed," boldly proclaimed. I don't think the +girls mind. Sipping mountain dew and with a pop a new can-Pringles, they +protest online. Forum posts. these fags: forever single. I'm ninety pounds +above the line. They say I'm overweight. So what if I could never ever ever +get a date. Yo! I'm a clown and I'm crazy and I sing scary shit. I've got a +gang of white kids who in front of Linux sit. The white screen pales their +faces which are pocked with pimples many, they spend their nights with pants +unzipped, jerking to Brain and Penny. This you see's my posse and you betta +represent. Don't be male or have a cock--our pants'll be a tent. This's +Violent J now, signing off, concluding this show live. It's time to show my +true ID! Love, Mega Man 5 I LOVE PEE +% +hi, i came across a picture on 'rate my poo' a few weeks ago, of a female +bent over in a forest or something, with a long 'log' coming out of her +backside. it's since been vanished from the site - any chance of it being +re-posted, or getting a copy of it emailed to me? that would be great! +thanks....... +% +I'm a Vietnam Vet. I don't like gooks, Islam and all that shit. It is a just +war in Iraq. Those son of a bitchin Iraqi's are trying to make other people +live like them, including you. Look at what they did to the Kurds, the +invasion of Kuwait and the beheadings of the internationals who have nothing +to do with the war. They're cowards and eventually will be eliminated if for +anything, their oil. The John Kerry liberals of the world are also your +enemies along with the fuckin' U.N. Koffi Annan is nothing but a +lying/stealing thief with interests in the middle east. Fuck 'em all. I'm +glad we went to war without 'em. Remember, it wasn't too long ago that we +were at war with G.Britain, Germany, Japan. North Korea is next. Kim Il Jung +has shit for brains and will also meet his fate. Don't trust those fuckin' +Russians either. The history of war always repeats itself. I would rather +fight and die, not for the liberal fagots of this country, but for my own +piece of mind and revenge. Fuck all that talk about colateral damage. How +much colateral damage was done in New York? +% +Just as there are warnings on cigarette packages that smoking will give you +cancer, White people should be warned that their risk of getting AIDS is +increased dramatically by having sex with Negroes. Not that a National +Socialist, or any racially aware White person, would ever in a million years +have a desire to have sex with a Negro! However, many of our racial brothers +and sisters are victims of anti-White propaganda and actually believe that +race-mixing is a good thing. These people should be made aware that their +chances of getting AIDS is increased by such actions.Negroes, who only make +up about 13% of the US population, now account for more than half of all new +H.I.V. infections, according to the Centers for Disease Control and +Prevention. Negro females account for 72 percent of all new cases among +women. These facts should shake the racially numb White into reality! +% +You have all been brainwashed. Yes the airwaves taught you that hating +blacks is wrong and they do not stop there. They are telling us that we must +accept faggots rights. They tell us when we are preaching the word of God +about how God hates the HOMOS that we are commiting hate crimes. Another +buzzword for you simpletons to use to make yourself think you are a tolerant +intelligent person. I guess you folks think you are smarter than God. You +tell the semen drinking feces eating faggots that they have a right to do +what they do even if it kills them with disease. You say I cannot preach my +bible and warn these filthy faggots where they will spend eternity should +they continue this vile lifestyle. Does anyone have tolerance for a person +living a Christian lifestyle. Who sticks up for us? +% +I always told myself I would try anything once but this was a total failure. +Was smoking some killer hash in denmark and met this american african woman +named shawna. She seemed to be educated and we hit it off. One thing led to +another and then She gave me a BJ which was really good and when I went down +on her I vomited. I lied and told her I had a cold with post nasal drip. I +have sores in my mouth. After wiping the vomit off of her and a couple lines +of coke I entered her doggy style. Good thing she would have made me +dismount after the expression of the stench I experienced. It was a terrible +diareah stench which from what i hear is normal. I had to take yet another +line of coke to finish the job. The sex was below average and dismal if you +consider the hideous odor I went through. Just got back from the Doctor and +I have the clap. I thought Americans were clean. WTF? +% +FUCC ALL U DAYM HATERSZ..U CAN JUX EAT DIS FRESH LAO PUSSY RYT HER NIGGUH!!! +I DONT GIVUH DAYM IF PPL CALL ME A FUCCIN HOE CUZ I NOE IM NOT. DATS ALL U +GUYS FUCCIN DO IS 2 TALK SHIT ABOUT ME?? IS DAT ALL U CAN FUCCIN DO? U NO +WAT? I DONT GIVUH DAYM CUHZ! FUCC U NIKKAS DER AINT ROOM 4 HATERSZ IN MAH +LIFE AND SOUL NIGGUH FUCC U! DIE N GO 2 HELL BITCH! ALL U DO IS JUDGE ME BYE +DA WAY I DRESS AND U DONT NOE DA WHOLE STORY. DONT JUX JUDGE DA BOOK BY DA +COVER! READ DA WHOLE STORY FIRST! I FUCCIN HATE ALL U FUCCIN HATERSZ! U +DONT NOE WAT IVE BEEN THREW! U NOE WAT! FUCC ALL U HATERSZ! U FUCCIN DISGUST +ME! U MAKE ME WONA SPIT AT CHU! NiKKuH FuCc aLL Da HaTeRsZ uP iN DiZ ShiiT! +% +Well, what else is open? Besides your mouth...when you're like kissing on +some gay dude and like holding his muscles, cuz his arms just are like +wrapped around you...and you feel like so safe cuz you're like, you know, +not like you're gay or nothin' but God you just want to like bury yourself +in his chest and just live there forever. +% +Mac supporters are always criticizing Intel processors for their deadend +CISC processors. Well, I just have to say it's not worth the weight gain. +So what the G5 has a more promising future? I've seen the obesity figures on +Mac users. Is using a Bisque processor worth the risks of being overweight? +% +Computers affect almost every aspect of our lives, from driving to alarm +clocks to music to refridgerators to our leisure time to our social lives to +ad nauseum. These things are intertwined with our lives in ways that are +often unnoticed, yet they affect us directly - so directly that I think that +when we are talking about the latest Mac product, we're not talking about a +"product" but about a way of life. +% +your a little bitch..all you do is sit at home on ya comp looking for free +homosexual website...................come to arizona mother fucker.the +desert juggalos will be waitin.hows bout you o to every state and walk up to +some real juggalo killas and tell em to they face icp sucks..then we see +whos tough....your talking hit through a fucin creen......HA HA HA HA HA +pussy +% +White women simply can't get enough black dick, it's a proven fact. You may +think your wife is faithful, but this is generally only the case if she's +not attractive enough to land a black cock of her own. Don't believe me? +Think about how many black men your wife or girlfriend interacts with EVERY +DAY. Odds are, she's fucking at least one of them, maybe more! +% +I've been running Windows XP since beta2, and it really kicks ass. I don't +have to recompile my kernel when I want to install an ethernet card, it +automatically detects it and installs the drivers no matter who the +manufacturer is. Dual monitors? No chore with windows, get two video cards, +two monitors and it's set up! I don't need to edit config files with editors +that are 20 years old, and show it. Intellimouse custom buttons? Piece of +cake, with my Intellimouse software.You want to run games? Great! Choose +from an array of tens of thousands of games that run great under DirectX and +the NT subsystem. Stability got you down? Not in this version, I have had +uptimes of over a month (and then the damn power goes out). Good internet +browser? No need for Kommunist shit, you've got the great Internet Explorer +6 a click away. Doing some development? Nothing but the best for Windows +users, choose from a suite of Visual Studio products that suits your needs, +with one killer IDE. Or, pick up a beta edition of Visual Studio.NET if you +have 200 megs of RAM to spare! You Linux faggots can keep rooting for your +piece of shit operating system that Windows 3.1 tops in terms of +compatibility, all the while hindering your experience for something else +you could be doing, while I use the operating system of choice (or by +default) for over 200 million others in the world. Anti-Microsoft zealots +piss and moan all you want, but your queer little OS won't be the reigning +desktop champion anytime soon. +% +Yep, Heidi Klum has done it, she�s shown just how low she will go. It�s sad +in a way, but to be expected, she isn�t getting any younger, and what better +way to bring attention to yourself, than to show the world you�re a +low-class nigger-loving slut-whore black pole-humping piece of euro-trash? +At one time, early in her career, she was quite beautiful, but now, she�s +just another pig. She�s no different than the usual white trash that ends up +dating/marrying this unevolved species that time forgot. So, farewell Heidi, +hope you get pregnant, and have the opportunity to raise future criminals, +murderers and rapist, er, I mean children +% +A special warning about Matrox; they are from Canada, and so their products +do not meet the demanding electrical standards required of American computer +equipment and because their chipsets are mostly illegal counterfeits of +American chips, you may encounter unexpected bugs and compatibility problems +with standard APIs such as DirectX. ATI is also Canadian and has the same +problems; counterfeit computer part manufacturers are attracted to Canada +by its lax intellectual property laws. +% +Don't open those emails. Don't surf that page. Lock yourself in a faraday +cage. Your monitor'll pop and your CPU will fry. All I have to do is click +the button labeled: Die. I've got your IP targeted, your DNS uncloaked. +Surrended and pony up, or click and Boom: You're smoked. +% +The closest I've ever come to sucking my father's dick was the time he +caught me going through the trashcan in his bedroom. As a teenager growing +up, I would always search my parents' bedroom trashcan for used condoms. I'd +slide the used condoms over my own cock and jerk off with them, excited by +the feeling of my father's jizz and by the idea of adding my own fuckload +into his. Well, he eventually caught me kneeling over the trashcan, sticking +my tongue deep into one of the sticky used condoms and stroking my cock with +my free hand. I was literally caught with my pants down, and there was no +way for me to hide what I was doing. After what seemed like several horrific +minutes of stunned silence, he finally mumbled something about the fact that +at least I was growing up into a healthy young man, and that I shouldn't +stop what I was doing or I'd get blueballs. As embarrassed as I was, my cock +didn't want me to stop what I was doing, either. My father sat next to me on +the bed while I continued to sit on the floor jerking off. The novelty of +this situation had me horny as fuck but also a bit nervous (sort of like +performance anxiety) and it took me a while to finally pump out my cream. As +I started to shoot off, I felt an unexpected sensation on my shoulder. My +father had been stroking his own cock as well, and he orgasmed at the same +time I did. I quickly turned around and saw him pump out another two or +three streams of cum. His eyes were screwed tight, and that fact made me +bold enough to lean in close enough to gently lick on the slit of his +swollen cockhead. I got the last drop of his spunk on my tongue. If he +noticed, he never let on. So I actually tasted my father's jizzcream, both +from his used condoms and directly from his cock, but I never did actually +blow him. But maybe one of these days I'll have the guts to ask him if he'd +let me. I think he might just not mind! +% +Did you know? The real reason slavery was abolished in the United States was +the discovery that niggers would gladly continue working in the fields all +day in order to buy themselves shiny shoes and fried chicken in order to +demonstrate their newfound wealth and freedom to other fellow niggers. By +removing the financial sensibilities of the white man from these shitskinned +jungle turds, our society has flourished greatly in the last 140 or so years. +% +It's just retarded 10yr old humor. Oh wow, Topless chick made out of pixels, +being zoomed in on by a perv. The desert comment doesn't even make sense, +there's grass there. Also, You can clearly tell she's dead, So that would be +fantasizing necrophelia. Good job. Sick bastards. +% +We need to remove laws which prohibit civilian ownership of rocket propelled +grenades and mobile surface to air missiles to enable our patriots to +overthrow the state in the event a tyrannical government takes power. +% +My mouth is at your disposal. Use it for your pleasure as I'm a GREAT +cocksucker. Use it for your toilet as I'll drink your piss and eat your shit +turd logs. You may treat me however it is that you want, whatever makes you +HOT HARD and HORNY. I like guys 50 yrs or older. Straight/Bi/Gay +Married/Single/Whatever...I am discreet. I am single and live alone in Long +Beach California, so would like to keep action in Long Beach California, so +would like to keep action in the LA/Northern Orange county area. I can +either host or come to you. I await your golden logs, mouth watering. +% +what is the point of gay marriage ? marriage as an institution exists to +keep people who don't love each other together for the benefit of their +offspring . why do gays want this? +% +It's a shame the gooks beat you good in Vietnam. (though you probably won +the unofficial underage girl rape contest)You fucking rambo wankers +% +<3 BUSH, ONWARD CHRISTIAN SOLDIERZ, NEW WORLD ORDER, MITE MAKEZ RITE, THE +SWORD CHOPZ OFF THE ARM HOLDING THE PEN, MANIFEZT DESTINY, REPREZENTIN' DA +ZOG CLIQUE, MACHIVELLIAN, DIDN'T NEED 2 SERVE IN VIETNAM TO BOMB DA KORAN, +BANG BANG, IRAQ THE NEW SOVIET BLOC, GUN-BARREL DIPLOMACY, VOTE NADER VOTE +NADER VOTE NADER +% +As long as I can remember, I've been picking at this small scab inside my +right nose near the nostril opening alongside the bone area. Sometimes its +flaky and hardened and thats why I pick at it and it never really goes away. +Other times, its perfectly fine. Your thoughts? +% +Hello. I am rich, and have the biggest computer. In addition to this, I +also masturbate into the most expensive monogrammed towels you'll ever set +your eyes upon. You can not even possibly compare to me. Good day. +% +I saw in a recent magazine that companies are legitimately selling catheters +as gaming accessories. Sitting immobile in a chair, hooked up to a catheter +for the rest of your life.. does this sound like anyone?? Christopher Reeve +tried in vain for years to escape what you people do to yourselves willingly +every day. My God, get some priorities!! +% +speaking of policy, at least my country has enough sense to limit itself to +two moderately similar political parties. you disgust me with your +parliamentary coalitions that don't manage to do anything except to +highlight the evils of socialism +% +OMG RIAA MPAA STARFORCE 3 DA SCENE IS DYING FTP FBI CYBERCRIMES DOJ RIP +ISONEWS MITNICK SCENERS CODING MOUNTAIN DEW LEECH ACCESS DISTRO HONEYPOT +UNIVERSITY SERVER OC192 TOPSITES CLICK HERE FOR FREE WAREZ CRACKIN +PHREACKING HPVAC PHRACK MAGAZINE 2600 MITNICK MITNICK MITNICK FXP COLECO +% +WTF LEAVE CHEESEBURGERS OUT OF THIS WHAT DID THEY DO TO YOU!? JUST BECAUSE +YOURE SOME PO-DUNK NIGGA FROM DA GHETTO DOESNT MEAN YOU GOTTA BE BASHIN ON +COOKED COW I MEAN SERIOUSLY ILL BET MONEY THAT YOU EAT ENOUGH FRIED CHICKEN +TO FEED THE ENTIRE CONTINENT OF AFRICA AND YOU PROBABLY GUZZLE ENOUGH MALT +LIQUOR TO FILL 200 BOEING 747S SO SHUT THE FUCK UP YARD APE +% +I fail to see how you're a genius; passing up people who can actually play +instruments for rappers who blubber into a microphone. However, I pick up on +the hints that you're an African American and you would support your fellow +"musicians" in their tirade of encouragement for shootings, drugs, and +whores. Little do you know you're only fueling this society's demise by +encouraging barbaric hip hop culture. Have a great day. +% +Of course, the day will come when the stupids and the normals such as +(chances are) yourself will fuck things up with your free-market, +all-American, freedom-loving life-style to the point where the rest of us +who have more than two brain-cells rubbing together will have no choice but +to exterminate you all. Sure, eat another cheeseburger and add another +pound, pretend to be a sensitive, caring guy when all you really want to do +is sneak into your room and see if you can find any pornography where hot +blondes are forced to eat shit and suck black cocks while hot Asian lesbians +suck menstrual blood out of their wet cunts. Just keep your head pointed +straight at that little monitor of yours, and you won't even see us as we +sneak up and put the gun to your head. We will show you no mercy. We will +find you, we will slit your childrens' throats, and people like you will +hang from the street lights. None shall escape the holocaust of the useless! +% +Would you like another piece of waddymelon to go with that fried chicken and +malt liquor? Beat it shitskin banjolips. This is a place for humans. +% +yea i'm in class and fell upon this site, i'm no techie but am quite +intrigued by the discussions taking place here. altough, i mean you guys +sound like internet geeks, the kind with acne and anime and weight problems. +do ya really need to resort to vulgarity against your own kind? express +your opinions, this country was built on those kind of freedoms, but take a +chill pill.yes, i did just type that. +% +i bet you shop at thinkgeek you faggot, go jack off while wearing your +binary watch before you cry yourself to sleep in your tux blanket +% +YOU KNOW GUYS I THINK INSTEAD OF CAPS-LOCK, WE SHOULD START SAYING CAPS-LOL, +BECAUSE IT CERTAINLY IS AMUSING WATCHING CERTAIN UPTIGHT INTERNET NERDS GET +ALL AGITATED OVER A BUNCH OF UPERCASE LETTERZ. +% +Typing laughter on IRC!While I understand that your knowledge of the world +outside the Frances-strewn shards that, on any other day, would have +comprised your double-wide is rather, shall we say, limited; Here in the big +scary city we "America Haters" like to call civilization, there are rules +that govern behavior and, to put a finer point on it, internet humor. And, +although one could argue that, having missed out on the more elegant points +in life such as color television or refrigeration, that you should be +exempted from said governances - I find it best to point out that ignorance +of the law is no excuse.This fact, combined with your abhorent +neoconservative indoctrination only leads one to conclude that your mental +stature, while irrefutably suited towards a more custodial vocation, does +not serve you well here on the fifth-gear world of the "information +superhighway." Indeed, I would be remiss if I did not instead point you to a +more, shall we say, rewarding hobby such as admiring your reflection in the +murky waters of the local "crick" or, if you fancy, arguing with trees. +% +slitting open the urethra, cauterizing the prostrate, inflicting corporal +punishment, blistering the penis with caustic acid, flaying the penile skin +with razor blades, sewing the prepuce shut with metal wire, encasing the +genitals in plaster or in lockable metal cages, or fitting the penis with +penile rings studded with sharp metallic teeth to discourage erections +% +The doctor performed fabulously with his textbook execution of a four-point +circumcision as he burst into my wife's room in the maternity ward, pinched +a clamp around my son's foreskin, and inserted an instrument between the +foreskin and glans. I covered my ears as the infant's shrieks intensified, +and the doctor was gracious enough to quickly tear the foreskin lengthwise +as my little son's head shook back and forth ohh yeah +% +I can't believe I just took a shit in my bellman uniform at the front desk. +What the fuck? I can't stand up and take it to the employee lounge because I +am literally wading in nuggets of my own ass gravy. Any attempt at movement +would send this rancid post-chili splurting all over my wingtips and into +view of every tranny prostitute within the hotel lobby. It doesn't help +that I've been doing the night audit all night! I can barely stay awake! +What am I going to say to the hotel manager when she comes back from getting +chili dogs and asks what I just did in the presence of the hotel guests? +She'll make me drop trau in front of everyone again. There it is, the 6'5" +shemale on meth just asked me if I could smell 'that'. I gotta go. +% +This is how I calculated the how the PS3 would be about 4-6X more powerful +than the current PS2 according to Moore's law. Assuming that the clock speed +and other performance metrics of the PS2 stay relatively proportional, in 18 +monthes the speed/power doubles to 600MHZ, in another 18 monthes (2005) it +doubles to 1200MHZ. 1200 divided by 300 gives you 4. I added the range of +4-6 b/c I know that SOI yields more efficiency and they certainly are going +to use more and faster memory...hence the range of 2. Either way, the PS3 +ain't gonna be 1000X more powerful. You'd have to be a gullible fool to +believe that. +% +What the fuck does that have to do with anyhting. Do you have a dick in your +ear or something. i dont want your fuckin apology, I want you to just log +off, stop fuckin writing me period and then go to your mothers room, eat her +out, beside the drawers, next to the trash cans, and then tell her I +appreicate her shaving my balls b/c its really hard to do it myself. Until +next time, fuck you and use your teeth to pick the hairs off my ass. ha ha. +% +oh yeah you dick likcing fuck. you are a waste of sperm your mother should +have fuck that truck driver other than that dirty as german (your +father).<---(you're not smat enough to get it, stupid fuck) Maybe you would +be doing something better with you life other than argueing with me about +posting meaningless shit. +% +Guess whoes back talking shit this mutha fuckin faggot is a mutha fuckin +bitch saying he hates rap with a passion then all I got to say is fuck you +you mutha fuckin bitch I fukin say alot of curse words because I fuckin hate +when you start hating on rap if anybody gots a problem with the way I think +then you could find a fuckin short peir and take a mutha fuckin walk I hope +you fuckin die a long and painful death you fuckin bitch later you mutha +fuckin haters word to your mutha fuckin mutha +% +before yall bitchmade mutha fuckin computer nerds come on here talkin shyt +like u hard get da infos straight..da man dat did my site TOLD ME STRAIGHT +OUT he did juice's site so b4 u call me a fuckin biter get all your facts on +da table u ignorant ass mutha fuckaz!!!if I MADE DA SITE u would have every +right to call me a biter...i didnt do shit to dat site..da man contacted +me..showed me juices site and said he did it...and then did mine and didnt +even finish it so fuck all yall hatein ass mutha fuckaz!!if yall wana run +lip do it face to face fuck dis computer shit..HOLLA!! +% +I've been into just about every car scene, truck scene, motorcycle scene and +yes the import scene is the worst. Main reason is because we got a bunch of +little pricks who drive around and think they're badasses cause they gots a +body kit y0 and in all reality I could take on 10 of them at the same time +and make em cry. I'm getting to the point to where I don't even wanna go to +car meets anymore cause of all the stupid bullshit thats goes on and that I +get associated with it cause I drive an "import". I'm about ready to go buy +another 5.0 or camaro and be done with imports all together just so I'm NOT +associated with all these fucking morons driving around now. I drive my +Grand Cherokee all over the place and I always have other Jeep owners wave +at me. +% +take this short quiz to see if u qualify to meet me: ugly? stupid? mean? +ghetto? non english speaking? not from ohio? if u answer yes to any of the +above, don't click to meet me cuz i hate all of the above :) +% +It's not so much that I hate anime, well I do its utter shit, but that's not +too bad because the world would be boring if we all liked the same thing. +Anyway what really gets to me is anime fans or 'otakus' as they have dubbed +themselves. They think that liking anime makes them superior to those who +don't, they think that if someone does not like anime it means they are too +stupid to understand it and they worship Japan. There ongoing obsession with +Japan makes me want to kill myself, they all want to learn japanese and move +to Japan to be an anime artist. They insist on speaking in broken Japanese +all the time, trying to show off to there fellow anime losers just how much +they know and they get offended if you say a slight word against Japan. They +also have an obsessin with gay people and yell and scream whenever they see +one, they say that gay people should be treated the same as straight people +yet i don't see then shout and scream when they see a straight couple do +you? No, they only reason they love gay people is becasue they are desperate +to show the world how openmided they are and they just wait for someone to +something like 'thats so gay' so that they have have a 3 hour discussion +about it.I myself don't have anything against gays but to be honest i don't +really think about it. I could go on for hours but I can't be botherd just +know one thing Anime couldn't be crapper if it tried. +% +I don't know about you guys, but knowing that gay marriage exists here now +has hurt marriage. Whenever I try and fuck my wife, all I can think about is +two sweaty, heaving male bodies joined together in government sanctioned +disgusting decadent man sex with large calloused hands grasping and moist +gasping lips joined with giant throbbing cocks ohh yeah +% +NO I SAY PEOPLE LIKE YOU HAVE SMALL DICKS COS YOU DO BUTT MUNCH YOU DONT +EVEN HAVE A NAME YOU SAD FUCK PISS OFF NO ONE WANTS YOU HERE ON THE PLACE OR +IN THE WORLD YOU FUCKING JEW NERD HITLER SHOULD HAVE KILLED YOU FUCKING ASS +YEARS AGO AND THE REASON YOUR PISSED OFF IS COS THE TRUTH HURTS YOU WHY DONT +YOU GO BACK TO WEARING A PINK DRESS AND BEING FUCKED BY YOUR UNCLE YOU +LIITLE DRAG QUEEN GO TAKE YOUR FAGGOT SELF AND JUMP OFF A CLIFF SMARTGIRL IS +BETTER THEN YOU WILL EVER BE YOU ARE NOTHING AND FOREVER BE NOTHING LATER +GEEK +% +I, for one, feel that Fox TV has gone too far with their programming +excesses. Have you seen their new show, the X-Files? It's simply ludicrous! +I mean, demonic possession? Aliens? Come on, that's ridiculous! But the +worst thing is that it implies our government lies to us! Hey, Sergeant +Muldower: This is America. Love it, or leave it! +% +HAHAHAHAHA FOOL YOU COUNTRY WAS FOR CONVICTS TO THEY ONLY THING THAT WAS +DIFFERENT IS ALL YOU FUCKS HAD IT SO BAD YOU GOT CRANKY AND HAD A WAR OF +INDEPENCE COS THE BRITISH WERE ABUSING YOUR ASSES HEY AND YOUR COUNTRYS A +REST ROOM FOR MEXICANS LEAST I DO SOMETHING ABOUT OUR PROBLEM WHAT DO YOU DO +ABOUT MEXICANS THATS RIGHT NOTHING COS YOUR A CHICKEN SHIT WHAT DO YOU CARE +IF YOUR WOMEN LOOK GOOD YOUR GAY AND THATS WHY WE ARE NOT ALL FAT CO +% +for all of you non believers. please just answer 1 question 4 me. If God +didnt exist then how did the earth get here.You will probably come up with +some answer like , a bunch ef gas and dust and a star formed the earth. but +if all that is true then hoe did that gas and dust get here. i am a +Christain and i encurage you all to be 1 aswell. You will be much happie, +take it from a kid that knows +% +ASIANS FUCKING SUCK THERE EVERY WHERE DOWN IN SYDNEY FUCKING OVEL EYED +GOOKS. WENT DOWN TO CHINA TOWN 2 WEEKS AGO BASHED A COUPLE OF THE +DICKHEADS.THE PROBLEM IS THEY BREED LIKE RABBITS THEY JUST GO ROUND FUCKING, +SPITTING OUT BABYS AND SPREADING THEIR CHICKEN FLU AROUND DAMN FILTHY +ASIANS. 88 HAIL HITLER SKINHEADS FOREVER +% +TO THAT PISS ANT COWARD FUCK COS I'M NOT A PATRIOTIC AMERICAN YOU NIGGER +LOVER I'M A PATRIOT TO WHITE SUPREMACY YOU SMELLY TURD. YEAH AND I'D LIKE TO +SEE YOU TRY AND KILL ME YOU CANDY ASS FUCK WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO BEAT ME TO +DEATH WITH YOUR HANDBAG. I'M A SKINHEAD YOU FOOL I'VE HAD MORE FIGHTS THEN +YOU'VE HAD HOT DINNERS. STUPID FAG SO SHUT THE FUCK UP OR I'LL PUT YOU TO +WORK ON MY COTTON FARM +% +FUCK YOU FATSO YEAH YOU CAN TALK SHIT BEHIND YOU COMPUTER YOU FAT NERD. IF I +EVER SEE YOU IN THE STREET I'M GONNA STAB YOU IN THE FACE WITH MY HITLER +YOUTH KNIFE YOU STUPID CHEESEBURGER CHEEKS THEN YOU'LL FALL TO THR GROUND +AND CRY LIKE A LITTLE BITCH STUPID LITTLE RICH VAG YOU DUMBASS SKINHEADS +COME FROM MANY DIFFERNT BACKGROUNDS RICH, POOR, MIDDLE CLASS ALTHO I +WOULDN'T ACCEPT A PANSY ASS SKIRT LIKE YOU INTO MY GANG +% +fuck asians I am from flushing queens newyork and I'm pissed the fuck off +because ugly inferior orientals are taking over my home town of flushing +putting up prices on houses and speaking there ugly chinese languages. +orientals ARE not smart that's a fucking myth. orientals will NEVER be +white. p.s. DROP DEAD INFERIOR ORIENTALS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! +% +as far as i can tell, mexico sucks. i've never been there, but i have +mexican neighbors. they suck. 15 of them live in one house. only one of +them has a job. the rest collect welfare. one of them was even arrested +for molesting a 12 year old girl. funny thing is, i took a dump on their +porch. i'm pretty sure i saw one of them watching me. i wiped my ass with +their news paper and jammed it in the mailbox. they suck anyways. which is +why mexico sucks. +% +congratulations on getting modded up you simpering idiot! maybe with all +that infamy you can convince a geek surgeon to remove some ribs so you can +suck on your own nub penis you fucking faggot!!! +% +I pray to the wonderful Lord Jesus Our Saviour and thank Lord God in the +Highest Heaven for all the beauty and love in the world every time I fuck a +nun with a glass-covered bone-carved dildo. Tear that dry and wrinkled +punani! +% +Objectivism is nothing but selfishness with a philosophical bumper sticker +stuck on its ass that somehow purports to elevate it to respectability. +Objectivism will succeed as soon as human nature is purged of empathy, +sympathy, love for one's family, love for one's community, love for humanity +itself. In other words, never.The only people who take this shit seriously +are earnest but naive college students with too much philosophy classes +under their belt and no real life experience, 40-something assholes behind +on their alimony payments, and nutjobs who horde guns in the woods and +consider themselves to be part of the minutement militia, 2 centuries +hence.Objectivism has as much a tenuous hold on reality as the KKK and +neonazi skinheads. They deserve our attention as much as the mating habits +of dung beetles. Oh yeah, I forgot, Ayn Rand is selfish racist classist +elitist bitch. Am I making an impression on you here, you fruitcakes?Stay in +the woods and spout your ignorant mumbo-jumbo, the real world doesn't need +you. we'll take your selfish asocial bullshit seriously when hell freezes +over. +% +I work at a University IT helpdesk, and after far too many malware problems +from far too many dumb lusers (and many of them repeat visits), I've adopted +a new policy.If a student or member of faculty comes in with malware +problems for the first time, I fix it for them and I give them a Gentoo +Linux install CD to go away with. If they come back with viruses/spyware a +second time, I tell the luser to stop bothering me, and that I gave them the +solution to install last time. Linux is an OS immune to these kinds of +problems. +% +Anyone think jews are really hot? Especially rabbis! Those greasy curls send +me wild.Sadly there's no jews in my region of the desert, so camels have to +do. +% +mexicans are lazy?? umm no we are theopposite of lazy. we are taking +overthis country and you white americans andblack americans people are not +doinganything about it.all yall do is say"fuking wetbacks go back to +homecountry" or "you taking our jobs,, nowwe are unemployed" you know what +boo hooyou call us stupid or whatever, butatleast we know how to get a +job.if youask me you americans are the lazy people. +% +Women are too fragile. The mere suggestion of being able to play a female +character in Doom 3 is laughable. Well, I guess you could play as a maid or +cook. At least that would be just about as boring as the current +storyline.It has been proven in many scientific studies that women are +inferior to men. This is why women are deservingly payed less for doing the +same work as a man. The only valuable skills a woman can ever hope to learn +are cooking and cleaning. Men are too busy with important business dealings +to worry about cooking and cleaning for themselves.History is littered with +evidence of this. For instance, Joan of Arc led an army on the battlefield, +only to be subsequently raped, tortured, and killed. In the Bible (the word +of God), Eve was tricked into eating the forbidden fruit because she was +weak-minded. Many men said that a woman could never fly around the world +alone. Amelia Earhart proved they were right.At least the countries in the +Middle East have their priorities straight. Their women are not allowed to +go to school, hold jobs, and in some cases they are not even allowed outside +without a male escort. That's how it should be here. Women should be treated +as property of men. In the future, I think there will no longer be printed +or coined currency. Instead, we will walk the streets with a couple women +around our arms and trade them for various goods and services.In conclusion, +go the kitchen and make me a sandwich. +% +fuck all this elexctronic shit. Give me a typewriter, a pushbutton +telephone, and a bank of teletype machines with yellow paper. Then you could +make sense of this crap +% +Now, if i were ever to meet one of you people who flames me in real life, +let's just say thine attitude might change a little. Ive studied tae kwon do +for 4 years, and studied kung fu as a young child. I am going to take up +judo soon, and also casually jeet kune do. I lift weights every day, and +have been in a fight before, and won. That's the thing, that behind the +internet you can say whatever you like to me, but you know what? Im secure +in the fact that i am popular in my circle of friends in real life, and dont +need to be accepted in some faggot forum to boost my self esteem, i am also +confident that i could kick most of thine asses in real life, so what do i +care? +% +Ok Im New To This I Posted One Picture Of Me On My Website And Now Im Trying +To Post Another But All I Do Stay In The Log AndIt Says Uploading Picute May +Take A Few Seconds Then I Check My Site And Nothing No Posts Or Anything +Someone Please Help +% +Yes I do like the Muslim Girls also. They get me very JIHARD. +% +One time at camp, well let me just get to the point, It was 3am and I heard +the cabin door open and all the other boys leave. Then all of a sudden i was +being anally rampaged by Mr.Sunny, the counselor. He kept pillaging my raw +anus until it bled. Needless to say, I still have a fear of campfires. +% +You know what's keeping the black man black, in addition to that attitude, +and that erstwhile PBS miniseries? It's affirmative action, fatty foods, +cheap alcohol, tasteless jewelry, and Kwanzaa. And of course, the worst +culprit. Niggers. +% +OK WELL ONE TIME I WAS DRIVING A STOLEN POLICE CAR AND I HAD A SYRINGE +HANGING OUT OF MY NECK VEIN AND I HAD A FUCKING HOOKAH IN MY LAP AND 3 +DISMEMBERED CORPSES IN THE PASSENGER SEAT AND I WAS BASSING AND I TOTALLY +RAMPED MY CAR AND BLEW UP THE SPACE SHUTTLE CHALLENGER +% +by the way i can' tsee a word your saying so if you're laughing at your own +comments in vain mr. wantin to complain about an ego mother fucker, then +you're really truly laughing at your very own comments in vain of YOU +% +Muslim babes turn me on. Those one's who dress entierly in a black bedsheet +head to toe. I want to squirt right into the eye-slot. +% +Fact: The word "mizer", traditionally meaning a one who is excessively +frugal, was originally short for "sodomizer". This is because in the 18th +century it was routine, and even expected, that the Comptroller of a +business would punish wastefulness by engaging in mandatory buggery. +% +I like terrorists who use bombs, especially nailbombs. And let me tell you +why. I was once a victim of a nailbomb attack and a searing white-hot nail +happened to go right up my japseye, welding itself to flesh. It was so good. +% +The Jerk-Off Walk : Drop that trau right to your feet. Thrust your hips +and beat your meat. Squelch and splurt go your oily cock. Leave the house +for a jerk-off walk. Strolling the streets while you're slapping your dong. + It feels so good it can't be wrong. Here comes your neighbor, eyes askew. +You saunter on up and ask, What's new? A hand on your shaft and a hand +outstretched, your neighbor made a gagging sound and promptly retched. Since +when is a stroke against the law? You say as you start to fiddle with her +bra. And there you start, right on the sidewalk. The morning rape's begun, +other pedestrians gawk. She screams and hollers so you punch her face. Who +cares if she dies? She's of the nigger race! Your cock already stiff begins +to invade, and you twist nips proper like Marquis de Sade! Pullin out quick, +and you spurt in her eye. Standing and you kick, right between the thighs. +The bitch is all mangled and your cum is all spent. Your pants, at the +apartment, your soft cock: bent. Now the task is done and it's time to head +back. Your tired wang hangs like a rope so slack. The nigger curled up in +a ball so tight, you smile as you think: This shit's done right. I hope you +enjoyed my anthem true. Now best of luck and fortune, love, Mega Man II +% +"LOCUSTS INVADE HOLY LAND..." was a deceiving web link. When I first saw +it, I thought to myself: "Whoa - Locusts in Vatican City? I've got to check +this out!" Unfortunately the "Holy Land" described in the link described - +get this - Israel. Is there nothing those cursed jews won't do to get +attention? +% +Guys, the funniest thing about linux is that the average linux user spends +from 50-75% of his (and I use the pronoun literally, because let's face it; +women just have more common sense) computing time configuring and +troubleshooting his operating system just to get it to run. Come on you +dolts. I know you're short a chromosome but does it take a vagina to figure +out that this is just stupid ? Do yourself a favor, put on a clean shirt, +get a copy of windows xp, and spend that time at the gym instead of +compiling your kernel endlessly. You'd be surprised how many women don't +notice your complete lack of social skills! +% +The Chub Chant: Rub a Dub Chubs Three Plumpers in Tubs - Watch them Squirm +as they Wash Their Nubs - Delight in the Sight of their Big Juicy Butts - +And the Sudzy Soap loving Slippery Fat Sluts - Cum Take a Dip in Our Super +Sized Tub - And Sing with us Rubba Dub Chub. +% +My favorite episode of Family Matters was when Steve locked Laura up as a +joke. He stood near the vault excited at what he had done. He pressed his +cheek against the metal, feeling the coolness and the tiny thumps on the +door as Laura pounded for her life. Laura's screams were deep and guttural. +Steve felt their vibration against his groin as he pressed against the door. +Aroused by the power of life and death, he exposed himself and masturbated +as he listened to Laura's screams. His eyes glazed in ecstasy as he chewed +on his lower lip and jerked vigorously to his ultimate climax. +% +Hey guys, did you ever consider what would happen if Star Trek perchance +waged war with Star Wars? Who do you think might win such a conflict and why? +% +why dont you install a real OS and make some room in your head using the +space you have to devote to remembering the 100000 ways to parse a text file +in linux (with zero ways to get any actual work done) +% +this ignore list is for losers, boozers, those boring and self-whoring and +folks unwilling to represent memories of Tupac and keep the dream of the +Black Planet alive. +% +I have looked at much gay porno and gotten no erections or arousal. I find +it amusing. Gay culture on a whole I find grand, gays are often snobbish and +excellent physical specimens which I find very admirable. +% +Apparently everyone is up in arms about this new racist Six Flags Atlanta +ride, they say it negatively portrays african americans. I guess the name is +a little bit insensitive. They call it the 'Nigger Experience' and the ride +is: when you get in the parking lot at the end of the day, you realize that +niggers have broken into your car and stolen your stereo. I don't know what +to think. +% +Coon Tune : There exists a people called the Shitskins. They're only fit for +stuffing cotton into bins. You might say "Hey thats crass!" , but you can +shove it in your nigger lovin' ass. I do believe that God set it up this +way, slaves for working,and a partner with which to be gay. Thats right, you +heard it here first, I love my gay nigger slaves, signed Fred Durst +% +KING GOLDI SIGNS WITH DICKSUCKERS INC and NOW LOOKING TO SIGN ALSO WITH +FAGGOTS SOUTH!!!!!! PLAYA FLY IS LOOKING TO SIGN WITH SEMENLOVERS!...MEMPHIS +NYGGAZ BOUT TO COME OUTA THE CLOSET..THIS IS WHAT THE INDUSTRY NEED FROM THE +SOUTH...REAL FAGGOTS! +% +Gotta Crap Rap: Poo knockin on the door, My rectum can't hold it no more. I +firmly clench to keep it inside, but there's no defense for this poopy tide. + My tighty whities stained with ass sweat, my quivering asshole hasn't given +in yet. Holy shit I just felt a spurt, this is a disaster I could not avert. +% +FUCK U!!!!! I WILL FIND U AND KILL U A HUNDRED TIMES SEVEN!!!!! U CAN COUNT +THE DAYS ON UR HANDS THAT U HAVE TO LIVE BEFORE I SLAY YOU IN THE STREETS +AND BUTCHER U LIKE A CATTLE!!!!!! NO ONE DARES TO DO DISGRACE ME AS U +HAVE!!!! WATCH UR BACK, FOR I COME WITH MURDER ON MY BREATH!!!!!! +% +Put on your party hats, its four more years of no legal pot, no stem cells, +abandoning abortion, tons o' guns, throat choking pollution, Big Brother +monitoring your every internet move, and best of all -- thousands more of +your copatriots will die needlessly on foreign soil! +% +I can't believe John Kerry just took a shit in his power suit at the podium. +What the fuck? He can't walk off and take it to the portalet, because he's +standing in feces-filled underwear at this very moment. Any change in his +standing position will send his poo spilling down his legs and into view of +every voter within 30 feet of him. There is no way he can play this off as a +fart. It doesn't help at all that he's been on the trail for 3 months. He +can hardly stand up straight! How is he possibly going to explain this to +his wife Theresa Heinz-Kerry when she comes back from getting ketchup to ask +him what the fuck he just did in the presence of his supporters? She'll make +him drop trau in front of everyone again. There it is. The undecided voter +standing below the podium to the right of him just asked if anyone could +smell 'that'. He's gotta go. +% +I've gone and done it again. After shitting on the toilet seat I took a dab +of crap and worked it into my hair. Now my bald spot is a uniform brown +along with the rest of my hair. I mussed up my hair enough for it to look +plausible. I'm back in the conference room now and no one is willing to +meet my gaze. I have to clench my stomach to keep from vomiting. My penis +throbs with an intense erection. +% +Sitting at the beach takin' a nap , didnt notice my bowels, now I've taken a +crap. Sitting in the diarrhea, think I should be sayin' "Mama Mia!" Can't +take it to the ocean, too fast a motion, poo would spill out in a commotion. +Too stinky to be a fart, I cant stop my pounding heart. Drugs have spun me +out for days, I'm in such a haze, can't explain it to my wife , my life is a +maze. Pooped in front of my kids, its worse than watching shitty itty bitty +titty vidz. On her command my trau I'll be droppin' , my poo will be a +floppin'. Beachgoers asking if I could smell "that" , Its just my poop, +smooshed in between my ass fat. Word. +% +Adolf Hitler, the Fuhrer himself, burst into my room one eve and whisked me +away on a dream vacation to the Bahamas! We toured the isles together +arm-in-arm, and made love on the sandy beaches and in the clear, blue ocean. +I fell in love with Hitler that weekend. Unfortunately when it was over, he +disappeared, but I know that one day, mein Liebe will return and take me +away to his castle in the clouds. +% +Dick Cheney has an odd habit. This bastard loves to masturbate using +Nickolodeon Gak. You know, that slimey stuff. Years ago, when he was a +congressman from Wyoming, he used to come into my toy store and buy my whole +stock of Gak once a month. I never asked because hey, hes a congressman. But +one day I was walking around Casper and I saw Mr. Cheney in his car. He was +totally naked , and was masturbating. His cock was covered entirely in this +Gak! He had 2 empties in the passenger seat, and was really working his +cock. I was sickened, and was about to leave when the future Vice President +lowered the window and asked me to join him. I couldnt believe he said that. +I jumped in the car and slurped his Gak-infused cock up ohh yeah +% +guys i am shitting in my pants at this very moment i can feel the turds +smashing against my white cotton briefs ohh yeah +% +Asimov, I want you to fuck me in the ass please. I am dying to be anally +accosted. I want to be ravaged like hog. I want you to dress like a farmer +and make me oink like a pig. I want an ass reaming like no other. Asimov, I +haven't had this kind of lust for you since the crazy college days. We used +to butt fuck each other in the stalls. You always told me not to flush and +preferred using my feces as opposed to real lubricant. ember your chocolatey +member, your manhood, draped in my feces. Man, Asimov, I remember. I was day +dreaming, escaping into a nether world where we used to fornicate and live +in fornicatory bliss. You used to like to keep your tube socks on to enhance +the gay look. We were so flitty and light on our feet. I am so very confused +these days. I have difficulty conceptualizing the time that was then in +contrast to now. I mea were a raging homosexual, now you wont look me in the +eye because of this anime woman. I know that bitch is a transvestite, and +you lust after my ass while you are being tentacle raped. You are closeting +your homosexuality and denying your roots in my ass! Don't be fooled! Asimov +knows how to suck a dick. He may nibble, and bite, and pretend to be +sheepish at first, but deep down this cock loving acolyte of shaft licks bar +maid. I am destabilizing. The world is going dark to me. I have +scintillating threads of motley thoughts; my ability to control my self +evanesces away! I have only an adamantine desire to see your balloon knot +once again, and to have you ravage mine! Asimov - I NEED YOUR HOT MAN SEX +NOW. This is your long lost butt buddy Joe, please come back. +% +Instead of crapflooding the Slashdot I managed to literally crapflood the +toilet at my workplace. I sprayed diarrhea all over the bowl, filled it with +foul smelling semi-liquid and left it unflushed! +% +Gilles de Rais had us all fooled, with his two sided life. On one end, he +was a fabulously wealthy nobleman. On the other side he broke into my +farmhouse , grabbed my son around the waist, and carried him off! He took +him to his chateau for a glorious night of rape, followed by death by +suffocation on Mr. de Rais' dong. He was nice enough to have an artist +record the event, and to ejaculate in my mouth as my son died ohh yeah +% +Willem Dafoe gave a fabulous performance with his real-life portrayal of a +monstrous child molester as he smashed through my son's window, grabbed him +around the neck, and raped him viciously. He was gracious enough to use +lubrication, and to jerk my sons little cock back and forth ohh yeah. +% +Hitler, Hitler, our glorious fuhrer. With all his jew gassing, he'll make +the race purer! +% +Chaps Rap : Wearing Assless Chaps, its really easy to take craps. Showing +off your erect cock, such a shock, every hour is jerk-off-o'clock. Your buns +in my face, I have to taste, otherwise what a waste. Jerked you off so you +could tuck away, its not Gay, Balls didnt touch anyway. +% +BongToke BongToke Two Four Six, Mari Juana Stiff long Dicks My chin is +bruised from Pounding Scrote Chuggin cum made tummy Bloat Smokin Weed 4 +Peace an Warez As long as theres Buttsex I've no Cares +% +Cock Jam : Jerk That Shit Holmes, Jerk it Up. Jerk it like the world is +endin', Jerk it till your mind is bendin'. Crunchy and Mushy, catbox. +Jerkin' fat cocks. Pearl of the Orient, gotta represent. Pants in a tent, +I've jerked it ; now I'm spent. +% +Fact: The product Miracle Whip is named after a mythical whip used to beat +slaves in the south that would turn them into highly efficient and +intelligent workers. +% +to late dip shit, I hope your not as stupid as you seem, giving me your name +and email to give to my buddies down at the hate crime lab. +% +Isn't it great to spend night after night online in the company of your best +friends? Nothing like shooting the shit with your pals after a long day of +watching Star Trek VHS tapes. After the long walk upstairs, it feels so +good to sit down in the Archthrone of your Painkeep, rip open a new Pringles +can and start sipping a freshly concocted Mountain Dew-Quik shake you call +the "Polyjuice Potion" in honor of Harry Potter. (uNF Ginny!!) You call it +that because after you drink it, you transform into something completely +different. Your deep cyst acne clears up, you forget about your obesity, +and you can chat about anime with people who genuinely care about you. After +a few hours, the chat slows down and you wander over to some Russian child +porn sites you subscribe to. Here's hoping the feds don't track your +Citibank card! Hehe. A good long session of stroking your four inch penis +finally results in a few drops of clear semen on your flabby fist, which you +wipe all over your lips and chin, inhaling deeply. Finally feeling a bit +drowsy, you click off your monitor and crack open your Gentoo laptop so you +can finish explaining why Babylon 5 shouldn't have been cancelled while in +bed. You fall heavily onto your greasy mattress which has a stained pillow +and a discolored blanket half draped on it. You sleepily type in a few +lines of chat while popping some throbbing zits on your cheek, making more +pin point stains on your pillow. Just as you see some orange glow around the +edge of your sheet draped window you decide to catch some sleep. You hate +this time of night (day?) Now your loneliness hits you like a wall. Almost +every real friend you've ever made has forgotten about you or is disgusted +by you. Why do you act like that? Why do you LOOK like that? You +represent everything they don't want to be. Why couldn't you just stay on a +diet? Why carve up every last pimple until yet another bloody crater has +been dug out of your cheek? Go to sleep...go to sleep, you plead to +yourself. Tomorrow is Season 4 of Voyager... Seven of Nine. You like to +imagine that you're on that spaceship, part of something, part of a group. +But you never will be. Tears mingle with pus stains on your pillow as you +squeeze your eyes shut trying to push the terrible reality of your singular +aloneness. If only you had done better in school, if only you could find a +job... and you remember Mom wants you to mow the lawn tomorrow morning. +Goddamn it, you're turning 30 this November and you're still doing this +shit. Your life is a prison and there's no chance for parole. Seven of +Nine... +% +I right clicked the clone brush over the head of the penis but when I click +on the anus it puts a ballsack in there, wtf!! +% +I've gone and done it again. It always happens when I need to keep my cool. +During the seventh-inning stretch at the baseball game, I went into the +urinal area and pissed right into my mouth. God, it tastes so bad. I think I +got the front of my shirt all wet. I just hope we can come back from 3 runs +behind. Allright, I need to get back into the stands, now that I'm refreshed. +% +we can argue this all fucking day, and in the end it didn;t matter any more +than it did when you guys started +% +I cant go a day without punching myself. It is the only thing I get pleasure +from, so I end up with bruises and I cry myself to sleep because the only +thing I enjoy is painful. I tried to kill myself once, but then I stopped +because my mom threw a beer bottle at me. +% +I have been worst than offended by faggots who've sought homosexuality from +me. I have never beaten a homo, but there was a time when a faggot, a +brotha! and this subhuman cat approached me in a GreyHound bus terminal +asking me could he give me some head!!! I would have murdered this beast but +I wasn't tryna go to prison outta state where I couldn't get no bail. +% +randomd's songs: Niggers Niggers, our dark skinned friends. If they're not +out working, they'll rape your girlfriend! For jail's their domain, they're +society's bane-- Let's hear it for our friend the Nigger! Linux, linux, it's +free as in beer. But if you installed it, you're a goddamn queer! To clear +up your pimples, the solutions quite simple-- Just take a bath and use a +face wash! Jews, jews, their noses are long. They've got to clean the extra +skin on their dong! They'll steal all your money, the kabelah's funny-- +Let's go for the final solution! +% +I have something resembling lava temperature pumpkin pie filling spilling +from my cock and my right nut has swollen to at least 3 times the size of +the other. I have a large, angry lump in my armpit that I swear makes noise, +my cat shit in my bed, my sister is fucking all my friends, and someone +keeps leaving little Cornish game hens stuffed with used condoms on my +doorstep. +% +I'm a 4'2", balding, port-a-let cleaner with dirty fingernails that lives +with his step-mother. My dad died in an controversial felching accident when +I was 5. Now they call me turd-gerbil. Instead of an asshole, I now have a +nice cluster of hemorrhoidal "grapes" gently tucked between my butt cheeks +and for some reason, they smell like clams. My last bowel movement was 9 +days ago. They hurt so bad that every time I try to shit, I cry. Speaking of +shit, a hooker shit diarrhea in my eyes four months ago... I still can't see. +% +ONEZ ZEROZ BINARY DIGITZ HACKIN CRACKIN STAYIN UP ALL NIGHT BUFFER OVERPHLOW +U GOT OWNED L33T5P34K IPARTYZ CONFIN PHREAKIN ----++++THEMENTOR++++---- BBS +LANPARTY WIN NUKE OOB EXPLOITZ MATIX HEAP OVERFLOW HEX-O-DECIMALZ NO CARRIER +FLIP THE BITS NULL ROUTE COMPILIN TWENTY FO HUNNERD BEE PEE ESS HAYEZ MODEM +PEEK N POKE SHELLCODE COFFEE N BAWLS COCKTAILZ OCTAL SYN ACK PACKETZ LEAVE +B4 U R EXPUNGED +% +When I was a little jew, my Ima told me that if you swallow matza it stays +in your colon for forty years. After I was interred I told a Nazi and he +laughed until he gassed me unconscious and then bulldozed my corpse +viciously into a shallow hole! +% +YOU CAll me fagit? IN COLORS? HAVE YOU no SHAME? I will break your glasses, +you nerd. I fucked Dor GITTELAMN, watch your ass, MODER FUCKER. +% +Hey, I totally agree that she was stupid, but could you please not use the +word "retarded" in this context? I know I sound like the PC police, but +that's not my intention - it's just a word that really offends me. +% +Never, never, never, never forget what subhuman Muslim Islamic pigshit +terrorist filth did to the US on 9-11-01. To put the destruction into proper +scale, this GroundZero photo essay helps. I've been advocating "camps for +enemy combatants" since last September 12th, and I still think it's way past +time to round-up Middle east suspects and intern them in the desert. The +Muslims and Arabs, who are proven terrorists, should be tried by military +tribunals and executed quickly. Radical Islam is an insane murder cult, and +"moderate" Islam is its Trojan Horse in America. Islam is a gutter religion, +full of deviant faggot girly-men, and women haters, and intolerant zealot +scumbags, who aren't fit to join the modern world. Kill all Islamic, Muslim +and Arab terrorist filth in the madrassas and in the US cities where they +hide. +% +When at last our orgasms had subsided, she suddenly leaned forward across me +and hugged me tight, whispering in my ear, "I don't believe it! I can't +believe I just took a shit in your mouth and watched you swallow it. That +has got to be the wildest, hottest thing I've ever done or seen. And I've +got to say that I loved doing it and watching it. I must have gone crazy at +some point, but I did love it." She hugged me tighter, and I squeezed her +back as I felt the pieces of shit she had dropped on my chest earlier +mashing between our trembling, hot and sweaty bodies. She felt it then, too, +and realized that it was smearing both of us as she crushed the turds +against me. At that moment, though, she didn't care. +% +No idea why people still code in C++ and Java. Get with the times! +Macromedia Flash is gaining ground very quickly, and will soon overtake the +aging "popular" programming languages. Those who have already tuned in to +the wave of the future are using flash to program everything from command +line utils to MMORPGs. You crusty unix programmers need to stop clinging to +your old ways and modernize! +% +low level format your hdd at once before you lose data +% +Niggers are not just African-Americans. Some niggers are Caribbean-American +niggers. And there's plenty of niggers outside of the USA too, like in +Africa. Trust me, I'm an expert. I am seething with hatred for those cursed +apes. +% +"The Swastika" is the oldest cross and emblem in the world. It forms a +combination of four "L's" standing for Luck, Light, Love and Life. It has +been found in ancient Rome, excavations in Grecian cities, on Buddhist +idols, on Chinese coins dated 315 B.C., and our own Southwest Indians use it +as an amulet. +% +I GOT SOMETHING FOR ALL U DAMN MOMS. IT SOMEWHAT RESEMBLES THE PECAN LOGS +YOU GET AT CHRISTMAS. THATS RIGHT ITS A BIG BLACK PECKER! +% +Any stupid fucking jobless fish eating rice farming waps think tou can fuck +with a real person come get it you stinking fucking retarded ass mother +fuckers. If you want to go back to where you came from i'll open up the ass +cheeks of the world and buy you a fucking fishing trip back to your +birthplace of infection. +% +I've done it again. It always happens when I need to keep my cool. During +the coffee break half way through my big sales pitch I went into the +bathroom and carved "nigger" into my chest again. God, it stings so badly. I +think the blood is seeping through the paper towels. I just hope my suit +jacket covers me enough. All right, I need to get back into the real estate +mindset again. +% +I felt a glorious climax approaching. "Jesus we need more balloons," I +grunted as I shot my load all over the assembled crowd. "More mother-fucking +balloons!" As my acidic semen splashed onto them, I watched as everyone +screamed and writhed on the floor in agony, their skin melting away. Oh, +they would pay for taking my balloons. They would pay dearly. I wiped a tear +from my eye and whispered "more balloons" as I started to fondle my balls +again. This will be a long night. +% +Niggerbabble is the unintelligible babbling that comes out of a nigger's +mouth. Niggers often issue forth these babblings while grabbing their +crotches, in a desperate attempt to keep their sexual organs from falling +off due to the effects of the many niggerborne communicable diseases they're +infested with. +% +I just saw a preview for "Renovate MY HOUSE!", and some uppity female negro +saw her new house for the first time and was shouting "THANK YOU JESUS!!!". +The only way I would say "THANK YOU JESUS" is if he got rid of all the +people of a certain race if you catch my drift. :D +% +girl did you install back orifice 2000 on me because you just caused my cd +tray to eject +% +Listen, dont make me stick my finger in your dirtbox. I'll fill your gaping +manhole with slimy man seed and pump some hot cock snot into your fart box. +% +When I was little a friend told me that if you swallow chewing gum it stays +in your stomach for 7 years. After I was married I told my husband and he +laughed until he choked me unconscious and then raped me viciously in every +hole! +% +Hey, faggot! Those assless leather chaps are pissing me off. How can you +possibly walk around in public without anything covering your erect cock, +and clean shaven balls. I cant believe anyone does this for real! You should +find some sort of underwear before I come over and put my hands on your +genitalia, to provide some modesty! I will happily stroke your penis so it +can be tucked away inside the chaps if you insist, but I'd rather you just +put on some boxers. Yes, I know I have pink pants on, and a rainbow shirt. +Im still waiting. Get those chaps covered up, and get your hot, tight buns +out of my face before I go crazy. +% +shut the fuck up you obviously have no idea w-t-f you are talking about why +dont you give up and go back to playing yu-gi-on on your little borther's +GAYCUBE because you are obviuoulsy too stupid to comprehend a real game like +final fantasy 8 (argubly the best game of the series) +% +Guys, does anyone ever have that thing happen, where you've just defecated, +and are wiping yourself, and the toilet paper seems to kind of... snag, and +then you realize it's sucking into your rectum and the next thing you know +the cardboard tube from the toilet paper is just spinning on the holder and +you've inadvertantly sucked an entire roll of quilted two-ply into your anus? +% +Human perception is subjective. The human mind is a higly subjective thing, +subject to an endless parade of subjective factors, a democratic "neuron +voting" process, nutritional and hormonal factors, and so forth. Therefore, +any philosophy created by humans is necessarily subjective, and so I find +your so called "objectivism" laughable to a degree, which, while subjective, +is still quite high. Enjoy the rape fantasies kids +% +Do not try to sexually assault the 13 year old girl. That's impossible. +Instead only try to realize the truth. There is no 13 year old girl. Then +you'll see that it is not the 13 year old girl you are sexually assaulting, +it is only yourself. +% +girl you must be a drow elf sorceress because you have cast level 3 ensnare +on my heart +% +You know, I know that this sheep shit doesn't exist. I know when I put it in +my mouth, the Matrix is telling my brain that it is juicy and delicious. +After nine years, do you know what I've realized? Ignorance is bliss. But +the funny part is, I'm not even in the matrix! It was reality!! I REALLY ATE +SHEEP SHIT!! +% +Anime? Could you be any more of a fucking useless nerd? Seriously. I know +people like that who go to my high school, they wish their whole goddamned +lives were anime. Probably because their parents got divorced and TOTALLY +DON'T CARE when they come home and announce that they're gay or something. +% +201 Come back in like 10 years or something, maybe science will have +developed a pill that'll make you happy and pretend that you have giant blue +eyes and purple hair. Until then just keep cutting yourself and writing +shitty poetry. +% +Does anyone remember that commercial on TV where the kids would drink Yoohoo +or some other beverage out of one of those juice boxes with the red and +white striped straw? They would get sucked into the box and have on giant +party. I always thought that if I sucked hard enough I would get to go there +and party. +% +gays don't belong here you fucking faggot with rippling muscles and clean +shaven smooth skin. you need to just take your lisping moustached mouth out +of here before the urge gets to be too much and you start fucking people in +the ass because you're a gay fag who fucks guys in the ass and sucks dick. +now put on your thong and leather pants and get out. +% +Miatas can't handle as well as other cars or SUVs because they don't have +all the weight to let the tires grip right. +% +I'm sort of new to this linux thing, but there's this directory on my new +install of Debian 3.1 called "/usr/bin". It was all messed up when I first +went in there. None of the files had descriptive names, and it took me like +an hour to figure out they were executables, since none of them had .exe on +the end of them. Furthermore, whenever I double click them, they just pop up +a command prompt for a few seconds then go away. I was gonna delete them, +but I got kinda afraid that they might be my kernel, so I fiugred I'd ask. +It's ok to delete this stuff, right? +% +You would make a perfect Liberal � homosexual, self-absorbed, hates America, +anxious to impose your values on everybody else. +% +What do you call a gay jew? � A sodo-miser! +% +Bill O'Reilly is a very important news personality, one of the only +prominent news anchors who puts politics aside in favor of reporting pure +facts. Democracy needs a whole lot more Bill O'Reillys to weed the +propaganda out of the popular media. +% +So, /. must be the Berekely if the internet. I don't mean in terms of actual +politics, I mean in terms of the mindset that assumes everyone thinks like +us, or would if they were intelligent. Ogg people are sort of like +Trotskyites, when you think about it. An infinitesimal minority that tends +to disrupt the conversations of others with their irrelevant diatribes. +% +I will freak you like an animal, putting my sting in you sideways. I will +hit you up doggy-style until the sun comes up. I will whisper in your ear +that you are the most precious, sexiest gift of God that has ever existed in +all of creation. And I will do it in sheets made of the most exotic European +satin. +% +Learning about lunix is not about compiling everything from scratch. linux +is all in the configuration, not the bootstrapping and compilation. Debian's +package management tools pull down precompiled binaries, automatically, with +dependencies, PLUS, with a kernel-recompile and a bit of knowledge with +menuconfig, you can "optimize" the kernel (which is all that really matters) +to what hardware you have. Gentoo's motto: "life is too short to be spent +rebooting all day, but long enough to emerge openoffice (mozilla, kde, +gnome, any of the big suites.) Debian lets me install the packages, and get +on with configuring them. You're not going to learn any more about linux by +watching "gcc -lncurses -o main main.c -DOMGWTF" scroll by for hours. +% +From my experiences on irc, the only reason i can see for using any non +windows OS (linusex, freebsd, sun, barbieOS, macOS) is so that you can +appear k-rad to your irc peers. +% +Hi, my name is Gareth. I'm from Brisbane, Australia. I'm into emo and zines. +I actually used to do sexual stuff with my father. It was kinda weird when +it first happened, but it's cool now. We jerk each other off and sometimes I +rub his load into my nipples. It's pretty cool. I like to taste it. It's +salty. Sometimes I mix our semen together. It's like a party for our sperm. +They get some "social time." For a little while we used to play with each +others faeces. It was gross for a little bit, but once you get over the +whole "it stinks" part, it's awesome. It's like playing with DIY play dough. +That's pretty punk. I would love to play with your faeces. Some would think +faeces is faeces but hot chick faeces is alot better. Yours would be THE +SHIT. LOL. GET IT? +% +i remember once my dad sleeping on the couch and something was sticking out +of his pants, i thought it was a knife, so i went up to him and i touched it +and tried to pull the knife off his body and he woke up with me holding his +penis +% +The lowest requirements for Doom 3 are a Pentium 4 1.6 Ghz, and as we all +know the fastest pentiumIII is faster than the slowest pentium 4, so I think +I'm fine. If not, I'll just wait for the Linux binary to come out so that I +can run it on my ultra fast compiled-from-scratch Gentoo box. No M$ slow +downs for me! +% +Listen: Freebsd is for amateur tinkerers and college kids. Only some old +fart who started working in the 90s would still use BSD for anything +important. The last time FreeBSD was ahead of linux in anything was what? +1996? maybe 1998? Name anything freebsd actually does better than linux? +There is never anything specific backed up by facts. It's always just some +"well it's like more robust or something..." crap which means nothing and is +not even true. BSD is running on fumes of hype right now, once people wake +up and realize it sucks it will be all done. +% +excuse but this person promised me he would send me shemale snuff porn if i +was to send him some of mine, he lied. i sent him massive amounts of +tranzgender fucking sucking,blowing and jizzing and he still hasnt returned +the favor.please to not trade porn with this man on internet relay chat +% +It's a good thing we have conscientious websites like slashdot.org to report +this kind of stuff, it was completely ignored by the mainstream press. +% +I live with my best friend of many years. He and I eat dinner together, +watch TV together, and drink together. While we were in the living room +watching TV, he asked me if I wanted to masturbate with him. I hesitantly +said okay. I let him get started first and finally got the courage to do the +same. I was amazed at how much I watched his penis barely looking at the +women in the video. I saw him glance at me several times as well We +currently masturbate together about 3 nights a week. After the first month, +I told him I wanted to do what I like to but didn't want to freak him out. +He said okay, and after I ejaculated on my stomach, I scooped it up and ate +it. I've always done this. Just last week he shocked me by ejaculating in +his hand and asking me if I wanted it. I licked it out of his hand and that +was it. Can I be doing this and not be gay? +% +i will make a point to you people that the youth cant buy doom 3 as it has a +thing called an age rating, and if you dont want your children to play this +game thats fine by me.You shouldnt go around trying to get things banned +that us p.c gaming nuts will play and enjoy. Do something constructive like +donate money too the poor or help old ladies across the street than sitting +in front of a computer trying to get a video game banned. +% +Hey shithead. If I find any of your posts modded down I'll metamod in +agreement with the moderator. You are a piece of shit asshole who deserves +to be modded down. +% +Sometimes I'm convinced the only reason ipod users are so devoted/obsessed +is the fact that Apple treats its customers like shit. You know, the whole +abusive spouse paradigm +% +You present a real and true perspective. A perspective of one who spends all +his time surfing conspiracy websites and schizophrenic web forum postings, +disregarding anything that conflicts with a predetermined conspiracist +conclusion. +% +You're just a common or garden onanist. You open with a question, but then +gab on and on and on and on about yourself. You are a virgin who calls his +mother every night and then sobs quietely into his imported Japanese brandy +while masturbating impotently to a DVD freeze frame of Janeway with her hair +a little mussed. You will never know the touch of a woman, and never have +any friends outside of your widescreen 19" DVI LCD. When you die, your +arteries choked with Cheetos fat at age 32, your last thoughts will be of +blessed relief, and nobody will mourn your passing. +% +My cock stayed hard after coming from his fist slamming my prostrate with +each punch, the onslaught continued. He slide his fist back in elbow deep +and with the other hand untied my restraints. "Now turn over on your back +with my fist in your ass and then raise your legs high above your head so +your cunts fully exposed" I flipped over feeling that massive arm rotating +in my ass, almost making me cream again. I held my ass up high for him as he +held my leg with the other arm and the fisting started again. I looked down +to watch deep long fisting stokes, my asshole complaining with gurgling and +sucking sounds as he pummeled my asshole.. My balls were tied of tight as I +began to jack my cock "Go deep, really ruin it master!" He pulled out, wiped +his hands clean and untied my balls. "Hit the showers, slutboy! Your asshole +is totally wasted" I could feel huge lips flapping between my cheeks, afraid +to see what he has done, I know I never shit right for a awhile. +% +your thighs sweat from the cheap velvet of your walmart shorts, the +cellulite sticks out like a sore thumb. you sit in front of your webcam with +the dorito crumbs on your chest still left over from last weeks smorgasbord +% +Do they teach english in Palestine? You stinky fucking sand nigger. That's +right, I am to the Arabs as Hitler was to the Jews. My job is to exterminate +every last one of your race, starting with YOU, you disgusting wretch of an +Arab dog. You'll lick my boot right before you dig your own ditch, and then +I'll shoot you in the back of the head. You're naked, stomach swollen, +hungry, exhausted. You're my dog. If you're lucky, I won't feed your remains +to the pigs. Nothing can save you from your fate, the fate of all the Arabic +peoples: to be wiped off the face of the earth like the plague you are. You +can try to ignore me, but let's see if you can ignore a pistol being waved +in your face. You have no hope. You're stuck somewhere in the Middle East, +sucking donkey cock all day because your dirty Arab hide has no other way to +get nourishment. I'm in the wealthy west, sipping champagne and laughing +myself to tears as I watch your race get massacred on my 40" hdtv. I'll take +a dip in the cool waters of my olympic sized pool as your corpse rots in the +hot equatorial sun. +% +Touching, long handshakes, grasped buttocks, even walking hand in pocket by +two males is common place in the Arab world. A considerable number of Arabs +touch more between the same sex, to show liking--not sex. They hold hands at +urinals, hug each other, kiss if close friends, sometimes with tongue. This +is a pivotal part of Arab society that few westerners understand! +% +GOD DAMN SKATEBOARDERS ARE GAY...YOU LITTLE FISHY CUNTS SOUND LIKE A BUNCH +OF WOMEN ARGUING OVER SHOES. GOOD JOB LADIES...HOW ABOUT THIS...TAKE EACH +OTHERS COCKS OUT OF YOUR MOUTHS AND GET OVER IT. THE WHOLE WORLD IS MONEY +DRIVEN AND RUN, AND ALWAYS WILL BE. ILL BET MOST OF YOU ARE 15 AND HAVE NO +CONCEPT OF HOW EVERYTHING REALLY IS. ITS SO EASY TO SAY ALL THE STUPID SHIT +YOU ARE SAYING WHEN YOU DONT HAVE HUMAN BEINGS DEPENDING OON YOU TO SURVIVE +(ie: children). OH...AND REMEMBER...FUCK ISLAM AND ANYONE OF MIDDLE EASTERN +NATIONALITY....ROUND THEM UP, PUT THEM IN CAMPS AND LET THEM SIT THERE UNTIL +THINGS ARE SOLVED, OR UNTIL WE DECIDE TO EXTERMINATE EACH AND EVERYONE OF +THEM IN THE USA +% +It has been brought to my attention from a fellow of mine that he fingers +his asshole while he jerks off. We were talking about Ninja Turtles the +other day and he was like have you ever given yourself a Donatello? And I +had no idea what that meant so I asked and he said it was when you stick +your finger(s) in your asshole while you jerk off. So to that I say no and +ask him if he has ever given himself a Donatello, and he gives me some kind +of faggish grin. So I call him a fag. He says it helps him get it up faster +and cum faster. I still dont quite understand, why in the hell would you +want stick your fingers in your asshole. Is there something up there +special? The farthest I would ever go is wiping my ass. I just can't +imagine, I mean I've licked an asshole by mistake once, but voluntarily +sticking your fingers or objects in your ass while you jerk off just strikes +me as vile. +% +You see, Bob Barker was in New Jersey with a 42 year old woman. At any rate, +Bob and this Jersey broad, told the Jersey broad's teenaged kids to throw +pennies at hasidic jews. A cop saw it, and bid on door number one. Bob +Barker had him castrated... he now goes by the moniker "High Pitched Eric." +The rest is history. +% +Ah yes, the Nazi's come to play. Wonderful, the only thing more ignorant +than a homophobe is a racist. Well god help you my brother, because if your +Hitler youth ass ever steps foot in GA, I will find you myself. +% +I have problem with my sister husband. He started about a while back to +bring his friend over when he visit to start acting funny with me. Because +he is my sister husband I felt I could not refuse it and now it has turn to +sexual acts of an improper nature. Although intercourse had never occurred +he has shot his sperm on my face, placed objects in my anus and made to +drink his urine. How do I stop before things go farther. Thanks. +% +Guess what, asshole? I was one of the earliest hackers in the 1980s. I KNEW +Kevin Mitnick. Phone Phreaking is as secondary to me as skullfucking your +daughter. I'm going to keep calling your house, OVER AND OVER, and the phone +company will NEVER be able to trace the call. You're going down. +% +I have survived fights by always expecting at least one more attacker than +what you see and [I] always expect weapons. The time that I was seriously +cut? I was caught by surprise with a guy drawing a hidden straight razor. +That was in my early days. I have been fortunate enough to survive attacks +with my attackers presenting guns and knives. Usually two or more attackers. +I have also come out of fights relatively unscathed where I faced +approximately twenty gang members, several times, different occasions. +Mostly knives, chains, and pipes there. ...My first fight with a gang? I was +in high school ...I was determined that no one was going to get my buddy +from behind. The gang guys all started taking off their belts and rolling +them up on their fists. We walked out of that fight at the end of that fight +and he had no more trouble from that gang as long as he lived there ...It +was a stand up fight. I think I wouldn't let myself go down because I didn't +want to let my buddy down. ...We showed up at the agreed upon time and place +and there were about 20 of the Chinese gang members who were there to make +sure there was a "fair fight." Sure, that was why there were 20 of them +against the three of us and they used pipes and knives. 'Course we used +nunchucks, three sectional staff, and chain whip. That ended the fight real +quick. +% +you must be real smarte to be albe to make a space robot, my parents have a +dvd player thing, can you turn that into a robot, it has a lasre in it +% +Since I was a kid I always thought of Adolf Hitler as a great leader. When I +took a Holocaust class in school and the teacher preached about what a +scumbag he was and how much Germany fucked up I told her to go fuck herself +and I walked out a dropped the course. Everytime I see her I give a Sieg +Hiel and the salute. I wish Germany won World War II and the U.S. lost +miserably. The world would be such a greater, cooler place. +% +Picking your nose and eating it is one of the best ways to stay healthy, +according to a top Austrian doctor. Innsbruck-based lung specialist Prof Dr +Friedrich Bischinger said people who pick their noses with their fingers +were healthy, happier and probably better in tune with their bodies. He says +society should adopt a new approach to nose-picking and encourage children +to take it up. Dr Bischinger said: "With the finger you can get to places +you just can't reach with a handkerchief, keeping your nose far cleaner. +"And eating the dry remains of what you pull out is a great way of +strengthening the body's immune system. +% +U CANT FOOL ME WITH YOUR HACKED PROXY OMG DDOS DRONE NET PAQUETS REVERSE +TRACE HAXORS SUB7 PAQUETS PAQUETS PAQUETS NMAP MOUNTAIN DEW HUGE ASS UNIX +FREEBSD SLASHDOT OPEN SARCE DATA RAPE FIREWALLZ PAQUETZ XPLOIT VIRII DDOS +SCO LUNIX PARENTZ BASEMENT +% +What do we see? We see the figure of a muscular man laying back on some kind +of rocky outcrop, resting on a piece of animal skin. His left arms is tucked +behind his head, while the other drops to the side of the rock. His muscular +torso is well defined while his legs are raised up and seperated so that +both of his inner thighs are shown. It is clearly evident what part of the +male anatomy is being emphasized here as one's eyes cannot help but focus +upon the area between the thighs and alight upon the man's genitalia. +% +The girl can probably never be said to truly enjoy the experience if she is +fearful for her life or suffering the trauma's of the victimization but it +still seems funny to be that if she is going to be raped anyhow than she +should at least get a good fuck out of it. +% +She smiled as she felt her finger become drenched in her mother's hot cunt +juice. She was surprised. She reached into her bathrobe and pulled out +Karen's panties. If her mother had not been snoring so loudly, Karen would +have worried that she was in an alcohol induced coma. Karen pissed for a +long time, completely drenching her mother and the bed in warm piss. +% +My Band, although composed of 2 flute players, and almost soothing at times, +is comparable to the sound of Kenny G, but our music holds messages of hate, +genocide, and anal sex. We played the title track off our album, "Hitler was +the World's True Leader", which talks about killing Jews and acheiving Nazi +ideological clarity. +% +No more group sex in the Jacuzzi, got it? You all kept me up until 4am, and +all the chlorine in the world wouldn't get rid of the shit that I found +swimming in this thing 20 minutes ago. +% +SCIENCE TRIVIA: Did you know that the more members an instrumental rock band +has, the worse they are? Studies have shown that the optimal number is zero +% +Trolls are utterly impervious to criticism (constructive or otherwise). You +cannot negotiate with them; you cannot cause them to feel shame or +compassion; you cannot reason with them. They cannot be made to feel +remorse. For some reason, trolls do not feel they are bound by the rules of +courtesy or social responsibility. +% +I didn't get laid. She said she was "bi but doesn't date guys", so we're +just friends. God I'm such a fucking loser. +% +So assuming that I know how to write cronjobs, bash scripts that change the +color of my prompt, and DOS batch scripts, which language should I try +learning first? +% +Who is John Edwards? A Disingenuous, Unaccomplished Liberal and Friend to +Personal Injury Trial Lawyers +% +EvenFate's members form so clearly the pool of their music: the ripples of +each individual's craving for creation and the ripples of music that has +influenced them. Stark, bold, complex, and moving, Even Fate intends the +listener to let the waves inspire them, so the waves bounce back, and +inspire Even Fate +% +you guys got no life and you have shitty computers cause you can only run +old warez +% +An Apple computer user has at least three of the following features:he is +gay; he thinks he's straight, but yearns to get out the closet; loves the +smooth curves of plastic; has more money than brains; always ends up +"accidently" in a gay bar to "use the payphone"; has at least once +fantasized about blowing Wozniak in a shower; likes running through a field +of daisies; has an IKEA card; has worked as a "graphic designer" for at +least two years +% +Okay faggots, listen up. Mandatory drug tests today. Only this time, instead +of pissing in a cup, you'll be pissing on each other's faces. Sure hope you +like asparagus. +% +Not only would I kick your ass if you came and said this shit to my face, I +would shove your head so far up your ass, you would smell the mousse in your +hair. I would also make sure I bend your your ribs sequentially and throw +water on your face the whole time to make sure you remained conscious +throughout the entire ordeal. Then I'd call 911 and turn myself in to the +cops, make bail and go home. You'd be in pain for a long time. I'd be home, +in bed. Self defense. +% +I just heard sad news on talk radio - Laughingstock/operating system *BSD +was found dead in its Walnut Creek server this morning. I'm sure we all +won't miss it - even if you likely didn't use it, you've probably been +served a webpage by it. Truly an icon of uselessness. +% +If the choice of a sexual partner were protected by the Constitution, +prostitution, adultery, necrophilia, bestiality, possession of child +pornography, and even incest and pedophilia also would be. All of these acts +should be legal as long as no one is coerced. They are illegal only because +of prejudice and narrowmindedness. Some rules might be called for when these +acts directly affect other people's interests. For incest, contraception +could be mandatory to avoid risk of inbreeding. For prostitution, a license +should be required to ensure prostitutes get regular medical check-ups, and +they should have training and support in insisting on use of condoms. This +will be an advance in public health, compared with the situation today. For +necrophilia, it might be necessary to ask the next of kin for permission if +the decedent's will did not authorize it. Necrophilia would be my second +choice for what should be done with my corpse, the first being scientific or +medical use. Once my dead body is no longer of any use to me, it may as well +be of some use to someone. +% +Like any red-blooded, masculine man of the male gender, I love PVC weaponry. +You should too. If the concept of heading on down to the local Home Depot +and transforming $100 worth of random pipe bits into a killing machine +doesn�t appeal to you, you�re a goddamn pansy. Also, you�re probably sane +and will live significantly longer than I will. Nonetheless you disgust me, +and I take comfort in the knowledge that your obituary will be nowhere near +as humorous as mine. +% +this is how you hit on a woman, you punch her in the guts so nobody sees the +damage. then you grab her stupid girly head and make her suck your cock and +if she doesn't swallow and say mmm mmmm hallo i love 2 suck ur big cock +please give it to me baby" then you need to rape her in the butt ok don't +let these little sluts get away with showing their tummies and bra straps +you know they want to be fucked so just fuck them +% +niggers must really throw some nasty shit out. because you know damn well +they'd treasure most of what white people throw out. +% +I hope you have an ulcer and vomit your guts all over the ground, and then +I'll do a saucy jig on your entrails while you lay face down bleeding out +your nose, mouth and ass. then when you are almost dead I'll jerk my cock +hard and start throat fucking you your stomach juices will make for a spicy +lubricant. your last earthly sensation will be of hot jizz squirting down +your throat, and your death rattle will be more of a death gurgle as you +belch out your last breath in the form of a cum bubble +% +Cassini Probe touched Saturn's junk liberally. It strapped its camera into +Saturn's rings and wouldn't keep its offensive snapshots off it. It was +performing many red-filter image captures. Saturn couldnt believe what the +fuck was going on. Saturn told the Cassini probe that the solar system would +not approve of a human-manufactured orbital device taking pictures of a +gas-giant for free. It doesnt help at all that the probe has been enroute +for seven years. I hardly had time to prepare and hide the massive alien +population living on me. How am I possibly going to explain that to the +scientists who analyze the images in detail? They'll make me drop rings in +front of all the other planets again. There it is. The aliens are recieving +a transmission from SETI. I gotta go to a different solar system. +% +anyways i had a dream where i was sol badguy from guilty gear x well i had +all his powers but i looked like me which made it 10x more badass and i was +hella fighting people and i had a dreamone time i was venom. but i looked +like me, and my suit was way iller =\ +% +UMMMM OK WHO ARE YOU? WHERE DO YOU LIVE? I WILL MEET YOU WHERE EVER AND WHEN +EVER YOU WANT AND I WILL FIGHT YOU. UR A BITCH ASS NIG-GA TALKIN @#%$ LIKE +WHO YOU ARE. DONT MAKE A GAY RESPONSE TO THIS AND SAY "O UR NOT COOL, I WONT +FIGHT YOU, IM NOT TELLING YOU WHERE I LIVE" I DONT CARE HOW OLD YOU ARE I +WILL STILL F-UCK YOU UP. @#%$. UR PROBABLY A SAND NIGGER. STUPID SAND +NIGGERS ALWAYS GETTING INVOLVED IN STUFF +% +Aren't you a bit fucking fat to ride a horse? what gives you the guts to +call yourself a cowboy? you probably haven't been outside in so long you +probably don't even know what a horse even looks like. cowboy my ASS. you +fucking poseur. you are just a nerd. go back to your computers and slashdot. +a horse could whop your ass any day. +% +I even named my computer mouse Scabbers after Ron's pet in the Harry Potter +books. It's really fun. Sometimes I'll talk to it while I'm working as +though it's a real pet. "Hey Scabbers, I'll give you some cheese if you open +that .exe file." Or something like: "Scabbers, you little rascal, did you +just cause my computer to freeze?" +% +You know what? I took the plunge and installed Linux today. Top Hat or some +hat version. But now I have a problem. Im getting these big red lesions all +over me. Im not allergic to anything that would cause that, and I havent +become infected with any diseases, my doctor checked me out fine. Then I +figured out what Linux really is. Open Sores. Linux is killing me! Help! +% +ok. i installed linux. and it brought up this screen. i needed login and +password. i finally figured out to put "root" as login but then i brings up +this thing like [root@localhost root]# now what the fuck am i supposed to +put there +% +guys do you know when tupac is coming home? Im worried about him. He wears a +bulletproof vest so he usually is safe. but i made supper for him and he +hasnt come home yet! his potatoes and shake n baked chicken are starting to +get cold! +% +The worst terrorist attack in recorded history occurred just a two and a +half years ago, followed by a Holy War against Islam, and now Israel and the +Palestinians as well as India and Pakistan are teetering on the brink of +their own war, Argentina is in the midst of a financial crisis, America is +considering launching attacks against North Korea and Syria, and you people +have the gall to be discussing video games???? My *god*, people, GET SOME +PRIORITIES! The bodies of the thousands of innocent civilians who died (and +will die) in these unprecedented events could give a good god damn about +video games, your childish image macros, your nerf toy guns and whining +about the lack of a fun workplace, your Everquest/Diablo/D&D fixation, the +latest American Idol episode, or any of the other ways you are 'getting on +with your life' (here's a hint: watching American Idol in your jammies and +eating a bowl of Shreddies is *not* 'getting on with your life'). The souls +of the victims are watching in horror as you people squander your finite, +precious time on this earth playing video games! You people disgust me! +% +If you expect companies to follow the copyright of the GPL, you should +support the RIAA going after infringers of its copyright. If not, you're a +hypocrite. +% +AHAHAHAHAHAHHHAHAHHAHHAH YOU FAGS ACTULLY THINK NINTENDO BEAT XBOX +HAHHAHAHAHAHH HOW AMUSING HAHAHHAHAHAHHAHHAHHAHHHHHAAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH JUST +GIVE IT UPHAHHAHHA YOUR NOT GOING TO WIN !!HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHHAH!!!!!!! A +NEW GAME COMING TO GAY CUBE CALLED PRINCESS NINTENDO IT COMES OUT THE SAME +TIME HALO 2 COMES OUT WHILE ILL BE PLAYING HALO 2 YOULL BE PLAYING PRINCSS +NINTENDO AHHAHAHHAHAH HELP MASTER BILL GATES CONQER THE WOURLD AND LET THE +EVIL EMPIRE RING HAHAHHHAHH JOIN I THINK ALL GC / PS2 OWNERS SHOULD BE SHOT +IN A FIELD DAM PS2 SUCKS AND GC SUCKS DAM SHAME THE GC IS WINNIG OVER THE +PS2 HAAHAAHAHHA SEE BILL GATES OUR XBOX LEADER WILL WIN US TO VICTORY DONT +BE MAD BECUSE YOU BOUGHT THE WRONG SYTEM JUST BUY AN XBOX NOW!!! AND SPARE +YOUR SELF WHEN BILL WINS THE COSOLE WAR!!! HAHAHAHAHHHHAHHAHHAH7TH +COLUM!!!!!1!1 GUES S WHAT YOUR USING BILL GATES COMPUTER ARENT YOU GAME CUBE +PEPOLE HAHAHHAHHAHAHHAHHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHHAHAHBILL GATES OWNS YOU +HAHAHHAHAHHAHAH!!! ENJOY ZELDA MASTER QEST WHAT A GAY GAM HE WILL NEVER KILL +MC LINK IS A FAGGOT THAT CAN TUN INTO A FUCKING KID !! ENJOY SUCKY GRAPHICS. +% +Or maybe i snatched your ip out of the irc stream and ran a backwards trace +against it, but hey, who knows right? Security exists for those who do not +know how to break it. +% +God damn it. I am sick of these extremist arab fucks. I wish we would turn +the region into green glowing glass. Don't feed me this "america caused it" +bullshit either, they are a bunch of fucking animals and should be treated +as such. +% +YES WE KNOW IT HAS DUAL XEONS NOW FOR FUCKS SAKE WILL YOU STOP TWISTING +EVERY SINGLE CONVERSATION AROUND JUST SO YOU CAN MENTION IT YOU STUPID, +PATHETIC, WHINING, LIFELESS VIRGIN PIECE OF SPOILT RICH-KID BUTTSUCKING SHIT +% +Batman whipped out a cease & decist from his utility belt. he slinked +towards me slowly like a g thug. "I believe this is for you" batman +bellowed. just as i was about to reach and grab the legal paper Batmans +hands thrusted towards my bean bag and he squeezed me into a coma. now its +10 years later. i have woken up. something smells funny. there is the batman +symbol on my bed as a shitstain. i have been violated. +% +Hi, my name is Najeeri Mongo and I am a quadrapelic who is deaf, dumb, and +blind. I also have a very blunted sense of touch. I have spent months +learning to read braille with my mouth so that I can come onto the intenet +and ask you all to help me. One of the care workers is touching my penis, a +lot, and no one seems to be doing anything about it. Please respond if you +can help me. +% +Have you eaten ground beef recently? Ground beef is the result of everything +outside of the cow's bones (including nerves) being ground up. Ground beef +often contains prions (misfolded proteins) which due to mammalian protein +metabolism act virally and will cause you to come down with +Creutzfeldt-Jakob Disease (CJD) where your brain slowly decays due to holes +forming in your brain, as the proteins in your body lose their ability to +fold properly. Do you feel as smart as you were last week, or last month? +You may have it. +% +PS- you'll fail at everything you ever try. Leave writing to the pros, sit +back, and feel the germs crawling all over your amoeba-like body. What's +that? Did you leave the oven on? Sorry, I'm so itchy, I can feel tiny mites +burrowing into the skin of my scalp, behind my ears, biting my ankles, god, +they'll go right through to my brain if I don't scratch them out. I just +remembered that I need to go refold all my clothes! +% +(���������) (���������) FOUR HOTDOGS (���������) (���������) +% +YOU'RE DOOMED TO A LIFE OF LONELINESS YOU WILL NEVER FIND ANYONE WHO TRULY +LOVES YOU EVEN YOUR PARENTS REGRET YOUR BIRTH YOU SPEND ALL YOUR TIME +CHATTING WITH FAKE FRIENDS ON THE MODEM AND YOU SPEND THE REST OF YOUR TIME +PLAYING WITH OPERATING SYSTEMS AND OTHER BORING SHIT GO BACK TO WATCHING TV +BECAUSE THAT ESCAPIST SHIT IS THE BEST YOU WILL EVER GET FAGGOT DIE DIE DIE +DIE DIE DIE DIE TIT ASS NIGGER +% +I HATE FAGS, NIGGERS, KYKES, CUNTS(IF IT BLEEDS IT DON'T FUCKING VOTE IF YOU +ASK ME YOU FUCKING FAGS), SPICS, SLANT EYED SLOPE ASS SMALL DICKED COMPUTER +USING BAD DRIVING THIEVING CHINAMEN/JAP/GOOK DUMBASS MOTHER FUCKERS NOW ALL +YOU ALL MOTHER FUCKERS BETTER GET WITH ME AND HOP ON THE WHITE TRAIN. +FUCKING NIGGERS DON'T HAVE SHIT ON MY WHITE MAN RIFLE, YOU WANNA KNOW WHY WE +OPRESS YOU? ITS BECAUSE YOU DIRTY THIEVING NEGROES SMELL LIKE A WHORE'S +ASSCRACK AND DESERVE EVERY PELLET OF BUCKSHOT IN MY POINT BLANK SHOTGUN +BLAST TO YOUR FILTHY GUTS. +% +O'Brien broke my will liberally. He sent me to room 101, strapped the rat +cage on my head, and would not keep his offensive rodents off me. He was +performing many red flag tortures. I could not believe what the fuck was +going on. I told O'Brien the Spirit of Man would not approve of the Head of +the Outer Party torturing the last humanist for free. It doesn't help that +the Ministry of Love has been holding me prisoner for months. I can barely +recognize myself! What am I going to tell Julia when she comes back from +room 101 to ask me why the fuck I told them to take her instead of me? +She'll make me commit thoughtcrime in front of everyone again. There it is. +The table next to mine is standing up for the Two Minute Hate. I gotta go. I +love Big Brother! +% +Saying that Java is nice because it works on all OS's is like saying that +anal sex is nice because it works on all genders. +% +The planes on 9/11 must have run Windows ME because they sure crashed +quickly. Not a lot of uptime, if you get my drift. +% +I'm selling a wireless Dreamcast Modchip, you dont even need to open it up! +you put it just to the right of your console (where the fan is) and it will +work. I have 10 on stock, 5$ each, or 10 for 45$ , msg me if you are +intressted +% +Your hands are filthy, covered in vast amounts of fungi, bacteria, and +viruses. Underneath your fingernails is even worse. Also, the stove is on. +% +I think the PRESIDENT is the BOMB. SHOOT, sometimes, I think about GEORGE W. +BUSH and wonder if he would like the ISLAMABAD deli on 14th st here in +WASHINGTON, DC. I think the falafel is to DIE for. Or even to KILL for. It's +so good it makes me wanna declare a falafel JIHAD on all the other INFIDEL +falafel stands in the capital -- from those near THE WHITE HOUSE to those +near CAPITAL HILL. they give me heartburn, though. it's like they +ASSASSINATE my belly. it really KILLS me. +% +the link is only old because you are a loser and have nothing better to do +than FIND THE MOST CUTTING EDGE LINKS ON THE INTERNET. +% +A recent incident (last night) not really wanking but being wanked. My gf +was tossing me off in her parents spare bedroom as she didn't like giving me +head, as she always thought it might "taste funny". Anyway, lying bollock +naked, being careful not to make too much noise, my gf suddenly, and without +warning decided to suck my boaby. I let out a "gWaARgh!" and started spewing +a massive amount of testicular dairy into her mouth. Her dad then burst in +to o see what I was doing to his daughter, she shits herself, and sprays my +cum all over me. I was nearly sick, and she just pissed herself lauging. Her +Dad dissapeared very quickly, and has been making subtle jokes ever since in +the presence of everyone! +% +your modem touched my junk liberally. he strapped me in to his comms rack +and he couldnt keep his offensive rj11s off of me. he was performing many +red flag RX/TXs. i couldnt believe what the fuck was going on. i told your +modem the internet would not approve of a telecom device touching an +underage kid for free. it doesn't help at all that your modem has been +lagged to hell after touching everyone's junk. he can hardly whistle at 300 +baud after touching Chali's diseased junk. how is he possibly going to +explain this to the internet when he is responsible for 99% packet loss? +they'll make him drop carrier in front of the whole network again. there it +is. al gore just called and asked why your modem hasn't responded. he has to +go. +% +Turn ons include: Star trek TNG slasher fanfics (_NO_ rikker) and +fabricating an intricate web of self delusion. Turn offs include the word +"Kawaii" and the rancid smell of my own festering ass-crack. +% +John Stamos is getting divorced just as the Olsen twins turn 18. +Coincidence? I think not. I think someone is going to be entering the +backdoors of two little houses very soon. +% +Did you know that spiders cannot physically die of natural causes? If kept +safe, a spider can continue to live and grow larger for a theoretically +unlimited amount of time. In fact, in China there exists a collection of +'holy' spiders, hatched some 2,800 years ago during the height of the +Mang-Tsun dynasty. +% +Hitler was a horrible monster. Is it even worth debating? He was a failure +as a leader and a human being; this is universally accepted. Why even +discuss the actions of this mad demagogue? I mean, think about it... the guy +rises to a position of absolute power, with (arguably) the most powerful +army in Europe. He's Blitzkrieging all over the place, Churchill is trying +to appease his demands to avoid a full-out war, he's essentially +unstoppable: and then comes the horror of the Holocaust. What kind of +demonic possesion would cause a man in his position to use his power to +practically wipe out the jewish people and culture in Germany? The final +death toll was estimated at 4-6 million jews, despite the -years- in power +that they could have been executing the Jewish people. The death toll could +have been much, much higher. Hitler was a disgrace to the human race, more a +monster than man. Even discussing his actions, despite his motives, is an +affront to all that is pure and good. The most unfortunate thing is that he +took his own life before the proper punishment could be bestowed on him for +his terrible failure. +% +Taking an idea that I came up with a few years ago, but just never found +time to execute (well they really didn't steal this idea) they took the +original Legend of Zelda "overworld" theme for the Nintendo Entertainment +system, put a stronger beat over it, and turned it into a great rap song. +% +XTC RAVEZ CANDY VISORZ WATER BOTTLEZ LOVE PEACE TRIPLE STACKED PAUL +OAKENFOLD PLUR GLOWSTIX LOCKJAW PACIFIARS TURNTABLES PLUR EX STROBE LIGHTS +LASER SHOW UNDERGROUND RAVE RAVE RAVE XXX FUCK FUCK FUCK LOVE EVERY1 KANDY +BRACELETZ ACID WEED POT DRUG DRUG DRUG SPESHAL K TRANKWILIZER EXXXST +% +that does it. i am going to write a 4 panel gag manga about this very +situation, and it's going to cast you in a very unfavorable light. +% +hello are you familiar with playagain website if not maybe you can still +help i have downloaded a file from there, but not just there a chd file +using bittorrent and the file i cannot open th extract whats in there i do +not have a program to open it or even know what format it's in the file has +a white backgroung and a microsoft windows flag on it. please help +% +I just ate some fried chicken. The breasts were juicy, and the buns were +soft and warm. Afterwards, the division manager of Popeyes came up to my +table and asked me how the meal was.I said I was satisfied, but the meal +lacked a certain je ne sais quoi. He apologized profusely, and said he had +something to show me that would make up for it. He lead me to the back of +the popeyes, to a room soaked from floor to ceiling in blood. In the center +of it was a live horse, chained by all four legs to the structural supports +of the warehouse like room. As I watched, employees of the popeyes cut large +sections from the horse, which was whinneying and screaming in horror, the +remaining sections of its body covered with festering sores and a froth of +sweat. The popeyes employees took the chunks of horseflesh and sliced them +into pieces, then they rooted around through the bags of trash strewn around +the room to find discarded chicken bones. They quickly tenderized the meat +with sledgehammers and fed it into a machine which formed the horsemeat +around the bones, then they breaded and deepfried it. I asked the division +manager why he had led me back to this place, and he pointed at the steed's +rump, the diseased asshole puckering rythmically with terror, squirting pus +with each convulsion. {We're just about to use that section, would you like +a crack at it first?} I quickly unzipped my pants and wasted no time jamming +my erect penis into the stallion's defenseless asshole. With each thrust, I +donkey punched the horse in the back of the head, making it clench its ass +even tighter. I came just as the horse died. I was delighted. Popeyes +definitely went the extra mile to make me a satisfied customer. +% +Eat your own shit. That's a great way to start then move on to another hot +guy's load. The smell is a big turn-on for me and that gets me going and +wanting to eat the guy's shit. My first experiences with was a guy smoking a +cigar...and I gotta be honest, that still gets me going.It helps if you have +a feeder who can feed me slow and not all at once...but then some guys like +it all it once I guess...different strokes for different folks. What I would +suggest for someone who finds the smell harsh is try eating slowly if +possible and holding your breath at first...it will come with time if you +let it.Sometimes it helps to lie under a rim seat with a mirror nearby so +you can see how much your partner is enjoying it too...this is a real turn +on for me...giving pleasure gets me pleasure I find...and vice versa... +% +There is a new online code out, kinda lol and brb. This one is a little +different though. You all know how it feels when you're talking to someone +online,and your Mom is standig right behind you, reading every word that is +on the screen.Then of, course,the other person swears or talks about how +much you luv your crush or something and your Mom reads it and tells you to +get offline that instant, and not talk to that person anymore. Well, what +can we do about that? To solve this problem, now we have started the {Code +9} system. In code 9, u simply press 9 when your parent or sibing is +watching over your shoulder as you type That way, the other person will know +what you are talkin about, and begin a conversation about homework or +something. When your Mom or dad leaves, press 99 to let the person know that +they r gone, so u can have a normal conversation again. NOW, SEND THIS TO +EVERY1 YOU KNOW, SO CODE 9 CAN GO INTO EFFECT!!! IT IS VERY IMPORTANT YOU +SEND THIS EMAIL TO EVERYONE YOU KNOW>> +% +BEST DAM WAY TO COOK COLLAD GREENS BE REAL DAMN SIMPLE. SNATCH 2 O' 3 DEM +PUFFED HAM HOX N PUT EM IN SOME FAT ASS POT WIT SOME WATA. BRING DA SHIT +TO A BOIL N LET DAT SHIT BOIL FO 4 HOURS. ADD MO WATA BITCH BFO YO ASS +GONNA LET DAT SHIT DRY OUT LIKE A MOFUKKA. DA BRAINSTORM BE TA LET DAT SHIT +BOIL TIL DEM HOX BE ALL FALLIN PART N SHIT. COOK EM REAL DAMN THOROUGH OR A +NIGGA BE GETTIN LOCKJAW. GRAB DA GREENS AN SEPARATE DEM LEAVES. BDP USE DA +SCREEN OFF THA NAYBUHS CRIB. TASTE DEM GREENS, MAKE SURE THEY BE ALL SPICED +UP LIKE A NIGGA ON A MEXI HO N FLAVA IF NESSARY. SERVE WIT CHIITLINS. NOW U +BE KNOW WHAT GREENS BE LIKE BEAT DOWN POSSE STYLE. +% +While jerking off with some sort of lubricant, mount something like the +corner of the bathroom sink so that your balls are rubbing. This adds +intense pleasure to your nut sack. Also, try lubing up something like your +toothbrush handle and stick it up your ass while jerking...it hits the +G-spot nicely. +% +Software piracy is WRONG! You are stealing from hard working programmers. +Your IP HAS been noted, and is being forwarded to the SPA with a +reccomendation that they investigate your CRIMINAL activity. Please delete +all your pirated software before you are arrested! +% +Linux is illegal! You are breaking the law, and hurting yourself and your +family with your ILLEGAL SOFTWARE. Your ip has been noted and is being +forwarded to the SPA with a reccomendation that they investigate your +CRIMINAL ACTIVITY. Please destroy all your unpatriotic linux software before +you are arrested! +% +I'm a guy and my friend is a guy and for whatever reason I've always wanted +to ejaculate in his face. For his birthday one year, I decided to bake him a +birthday cake. In the middle of the baking, I decided I'll ejaculate in the +cake. He ate the cake. Therefore I indirectly ejaculated in his face. +% +My favorite way to masturbate is to purchase some Nickelodeon Gak. For those +who don't know its a strange little gel substance that's really cold and +slippery. It makes me feel like I'm having sex with an alien. +% +CALLING ALL 3RD GRADERS! How can you people think this game is entertaining? +i bet you also like pokemon, rayman, tak and the power of really stupid +games, and megaman battle network. why dont you grow up and play some real +games like Resident Evil. Oh wait, i forgot, your too dumb and your mommy +wont let you buy M-rated games. BOOO-HOOO! or the greatest game ever forged +by mankind....DIABLO 2!!! +% +MMMM........mmmm i'm abit confusing right now......why will they eat their +own poo-poo where it smell so terrible? Actually, mushu is very good in her +toilet training. She'll only pee & poo on the newspaper i prepared for her. +But she eats it when i'm away! After i beat her twice, she seems to bark at +the poo first before she goes near it. Then she'll smell it & play with it. +Then she'll put everything into her mouth!!!!! Yucks!!! But i didn't get the +chance to see it but my housemates did. +% +yeah it si ok bcuz if an older hamster itz his\her own poo they get the +mineral and vitamins thats left behind and was missed so it go though 2 +times and for the babys it is ok bcuz they need to eat the older hamster poo +so their stomach can get the bacteria and other stuff so it can help the +baby im not saying to pick up poo and stick it in the nest they willd o it +them self......(you wont see them) +% +2 to the izzle and 3 to the shizzle, see you on the flopside. your friend, +Riley Michel +% +My band, although hardcore, and almost scary at times, is comparable to the +sound of Limp Bizkit, but our music holds messages of much value. We played +the title track off our album, "This Road," which talks about working hard +to achieve goals in life. +% +I FOUND THIS REALLY COOL GAME CALLED EVERQUEST EVER HEARD OF IT LET ME TELL +U ABOUT MY ADVENTURES BTW I USE CHEETO CRUMBS FOR BABY POWDER WHEN I GET +MOISTURE PROBLEMS IN MY CROTCH +% +my name is Akmar and i am 7 yrs old and dad tied me in the basement and tell +me to have all dos game by 7 o clock or i get no food plz help +% +I'm not a goth. Many goths say this, but I'm really not one. Well, OK, I +wear black. And I like goth music. And regularly go to goth clubs. Argh, and +I've been known to wear silly goth outfits when I go. But I'm still not a +goth. +% +I've learned over the last week that I really like oral sex. I've learned +that every guy tastes differently and overall I like the taste. But. Cum is +best served fresh and hot. Cold cum is not my idea of a good meal. +% +I may not be as tech savvy as Linus Torvalds, but I know my way around the +Windows registry. +% +I really cant wait to get the money for the full version and my own server +with my clan so I can kick fags. Its amazing to me the capacity some people +have for being assholes and losers in a video game +% +IRAQI PRISONERS TORTURED? THIS IS NO DIFFERENT THAN WHAT HAPPENS AT THE +SKULL & BONES INITIATION...I'M TALKING ABOUT PEOPLE HAVING A GOOD TIME. +THESE PEOPLE -- YOU EVER HEARD OF EMOTIONAL RELEASE? YOU EVER HEARD OF +NEEDING TO BLOW SOME STEAM OFF? +% +"If a man finds a girl who is a virgin, who is not engaged, and seizes her +and lies with her and they are discovered, then the man who lay with her +shall give to the girl's father fifty {shekels} of silver, and she shall +become his wife because he has violated her; he cannot divorce her all his +days." (Deuteronomy 22:28-29, NASB) Can you imagine the mental torment and +terror such a woman would endure after being married to her rapist? +% +Christ clearly came to destroy Judaism and had nothing but contempt for the +Jews. He rejected their laws and customs, called them the spawn of Satan, +and basically condemned them to hell. How can anyone deny that the Jews were +directly responsible for the death of Christ when Christ himself directly +blames the Jews prior to his death? There is no Judeo-Christian religion, +tradition, or anything else. There is a war between God and the children of +Satan (Jews) that God will win, but nothing else. To speak of a +Judeo-Christian tradition, is like speaking of a Satanic-Christian tradition. +% +Yo, dawg, are you hitting on me? God, I hate fags! I wish one was here right +now. I'd make him fuck me up the ass and jerk off all over my face. And then +I'd lick his nipples while cupping his balls in my hands and be like, 'Is +that how you like it? Huh? Is that how you like it, fag?' And then I'd make +him take a dump on my chest while I masturbated. That'd teach that goddamn +queer. +% +I'm Jordan. I just wanted to see what my rating is, so please be honest. I'm +a good guy with a nice heart, and I love to read poetry. I am a full time +christian and I love the world. Live life to the fullest. Peace. +% +Ever since I was three I knew that something was something different in my +sexual preferences, as time went on I realized that I liked anime babes and +Hentai. Ever since then I have been looking at anime porn and such, I`m not +attracted to real girls that much. If I see a girl naked I won`t like it but +If I see hentai I`m all in for it. Since I`m a christian I`m wondering if +God made me this way for punishment or something, I don`t blame him at all. +He didn`t have to make me anyway so I thank him for simply making me. Anyway +is it normal for me to like anime babes or not? Should I tell my parents or +hide this secret from them? I`m looking at this HOT anime babe in her bra +and panties and I`m hard as heck! But is this a sin? +% +Like you've ever been to an arcade. The skin on your back would peel off if +you ever extricated yourself from your oily throne of cheeto crumbs and +mountain dew stains. +% +Im in the middle east. Middle eastern people may have dark skin like a +grl.......face it bitch...ur a motherfuckin dick suckin man +hoe!!!!!!!!!.........ur a faget ass punk pussy lil girl......ur da gayest +person ever........go to hell bitch!!!! +% +your fuckin gay you should be shot and put in a gas chamber you fuckin peice +of trailer trash....you put your moms dick back in your mouth and shut the +fuck up the song fuckin rules +% +I�AM�CAUSING�YOUR�XTERM�TO�SCROLL�THE�CAUSE�OF�YOUR�XTERM�SCROLLING�IS:�ME� +% +I thought ocd was like a car, too, but then my psychiatrist suggested that I +don't have to wash and wax my car and walk around it three times every time +before I drive (some of the paint is comming off, and it is only a 2002 +lumina) so I tried not doing it and that very same day, I got in a car +accident and they had to amputate part of my foot. Luckily I walked around +the car ONCE, or I might have been killed! I used to think cutting was self +destructive, but that was before it made me rich, famous, and helped me meet +the love of my life. Boy am I glad I never put down the razor! If you care +about yourself, cut EVERY DAY. If your boyfriend has OCD, you can Trick him +out of it. Try moving his car keys when he's not looking, changing the +ingredients in his food, swich his computer to spanish text by default, make +subtle hints that you are sleeping around on him. This will jog his brain +into working correctly, and he'll know you're only doing it because you love +him! +% +If your son has requested a new "processor" from a company called "AMD", +this is genuine cause for alarm. AMD is a third-world based company who make +inferior, "knock-off" copies of American processor chips. They use child +labor extensively in their third world sweatshops, and they deliberately +disable the security features that American processor makers, such as Intel, +use toprevent hacking.AMD chips are never sold in stores, and you will most +likely be told that you have to order them from internet sites. Do not buy +this chip! This is one request that you must refuse your son, if you are to +have any hope of raising him well. +% +There are, unfortunately, many hacking manuals available in bookshops today. +A few titles to be on the lookout for are: "Snow Crash" and "Cryptonomicon" +by Neal Stephenson; "Neuromancer" by William Gibson; "Programming with Perl" +by Timothy O'Reilly; "Geeks" by Jon Katz; "The Hacker Crackdown" by Bruce +Sterling; "Microserfs" by Douglas Coupland; "Hackers" by Steven Levy; and +"The Cathedral and the Bazaar" by Eric S. Raymond. +% +Did you Europeans quit when you were behind in your butchering Jews like +unwanted fetuses? Don't bother booting up En Carta, genius, the answer is +no. My yarmulke wearing Sergeant Grandpa had to fly his jet over there and +knock the gas chamber remote out of your assy smelling fingers himself. And +while he was at it I think he popped a WWII era cap right in your sunken +euro-chest. I'll never forget the stories he told me about how he and his +buddies and a bunch of foxy WAVES liberated ol' San Francisco from you +slanty-eyed motherfuckers. +% +Another Infected Dick Sucker - that's what AIDS stands for. I'm going to +live to see the day you queers die a horrible death. There's no reason for +you to be here on earth. +% +So let me guess, you were one of those guys late up at night. jobless, and +tired of going to your dead end job, until you saw a commercial for an +exciting career in "Information Technology!" offered by the DeVry institute +where you will be trained in as little as 3 months in the field of +INFORMATION TECHNOLOGY! Promising you the career of $50,000 a yearAnd now +with this knowledge and your A+ certification, you join random channels in +irc in the hopes of you connecting with other INFORMATION TECHNOLOGY! +professionals so you can show off your shiny new {Certificate of completion} +from the DeVry institute. +% +The Quran requires the infidel, whether Jew or Christian, to be killed. ... +That's a core essence of the religion. ... Muhammad was a pirate who killed +infidels and who advocated the killing of infidels. Not a nice guy. Osama +bin Laden is in keeping with his fine tradition. +% +BSD, Lunix, Debian and Mandrake are all versions of an illegal hacker +operation system, invented by a Soviet computer hacker named Linyos +Torovoltos, before the Russians lost the Cold War. It is based on a program +called "xenix", which was written by Microsoft for the US government. These +programs are used by hackers to break into other people's computer systems +to steal credit card numbers. They may also be used to break into people's +stereos to steal their music, using the 'mp3' program. Torovoltos is a +notorious hacker, responsible for writing many hacker programs, such as +'telnet', which is used by hackers to connect to machines on the internet +without using a telephone. +% +I'm all talk? Lets meet at a secluded place and I'll show you how much talk +I am you pussy. I'll burry you so deep that your mommy will litter all of +California with your missing posters. +% +I JUST HAD THIS FREAK ACCIDENT WHERE I SAT DOWN TO WORK AND I SPILLED DOPE +INTO THE BONG AND THE LIGHTER FLICKED OUT AND SET IT ON FIRE AND THE WHEELS +OF MY CHAIR SLIPPED BACK AND I INHALED THE DOPE SMOKE AND ATE A MUFFIN +% +EFnet split my junk liberally. It strapped me into its splitting server and +would not keep its offensive lag off of me. It was performing many red flag +timeouts. I told EFnet dalvenjah would not approve of its servers +impersonating DALnet for free. It doesn't help that EFnet has been run by +nazis for eight years. Its hubs can barely stay up! What is EFnet going to +say to comstud when he comes back from a Dianora blow job and asks what the +fuck EFnet just did in front of 120,000 users? He'll make the hubs squit in +front of all the opers again. There it is. They just relinked irc.aol.com. I +gotta go. +% +Finally, a break from the linux tax. Yeah, you know the one -- the one that +makes you pour hundreds and hundreds of wasted man-hours into using poorly +written programs with little or no documentation. What can you expect from +spaghetti code written by hobbyists and students? I'll happily give my money +to the professionals any day, no matter what News for Nerds declares. +Honestly, I know most of you agree with me! +% +IF U R ON DIZ LIST, WTACH OUT!!! U R A MARKED MAN (OR WOMAN), I WILL HAV MY +VENGEANCE ON U ALL!!! U SHALL FEEL MY WRATHLY WRATH, U SHALL RUE DA DAY U +MADE AN N.A.ME OF DA MAD MATRIX HA><0R!!@#!$ +% +When the hell will all those people just curl up and die? I'm so heartily +sick of that mustachioed hippie free-love deviant ESR spouting his OSS +filth. When will he realise that he's made all the money he possibly can +from it, and it's time to just shut up and move along now? +% +Humidity overheated my junk liberally. It strapped me into its ambient +temperature and would not keep its offensive moisture off of me. It was +causing many red-flag heat strokes. I could not believe what the fuck was +going on. I told humidity that the Weather Network would not approve of a +cool front coming out of the Gulf Stream for free. It doesn.t help that the +Humidex has been at 40% for weeks. I can barely walk straight! What am I +going to tell my wife when she comes back from getting ice to ask why the +fuck I.m towelling off my balls in the presence of our children? She.ll make +me drop trau and use deodorant in front of everyone again. There it is. The +guy across the street just asked if anyone could smell .that.. I gotta go +shower. +% +HOT XXX YOUNG CUMSHOT WATERSPORTS ANAL FUCK BRITNEY SEX GRANDMA CUTE VOYEUR +LATINA FACIAL HENTAI PORN JACKOFF PUSSY ANAL SEX BLOWJOBS BACKDOOR HERSHEY +HIGHWAY CUMSHOT TEABAG $$DVDA$$ TITTY FUCK DIRTY SANCHEZ $DOUBLE +PENETRATION$ JAPSCAT $GOLDEN SHOWER$ LATTE ENEMAS $TVTA$ SKULLFUCK +DOGGYSTYLE MISSIONARY $QVQA$ !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!DIRTY HORSE BEASTIALITY KIDDY +PR0N LOLITA.MPG.JPG.AVI.DIVX.BMP.MOV.PIF +% +BANG BANG ALLAH MECCA KORAN AL AQSA BIN LADEN SHAHID YA SADDAM YA HABIB +UTRUB UTRUB TEL AVIV FILIN FILTIN FILYALLA FALESTIN $$TURBAN$$ AFGHANISTAN +WAR ON TERROR W.T.C 9/11-NEVER 4-GET JIHAD HEAVEN AL AQSA AL ABDALLAH YA +SHARIF AL QAEDA THE SHAYKH EMIR ABU ABDALLAH IN SPIRIT AND IN BLOOD WE WILL +FREE JERUSALEM AND ABU AMAR MATADERRA MATADERRA HAJJ NUJAHID ALLAH EMIR AL +HABIBBI +% +XTC RAVEZ CANDY VISORZ WATER BOTTLEZ LOVE PEACE TRIPLE STACKED PAUL +OAKENFOLD PLUR GLOWSTIX LOCKJAW PACIFIARS TURNTABLES PLUR EX STROBE LIGHTS +LASER SHOW UNDERGROUND RAVE RAVE RAVE XXX FUCK FUCK FUCK LOVE EVERY1 KANDY +BRACELETZ ACID WEED POT DRUG DRUG DRUG SPESHAL K TRANKWILIZER EXXXSTASY +COLORS UNDERGROUND RAVE MUZIK XTC DANCE ALL NITE FUCK THE PARENTZ +DEYHDRATION HUGE PANTS BODY PAINT PLUR PLUR PLUR LOCKJAW GLOW STIX VISOR +UNDERGROU +% +AUNT JEMIMA UNCLE BENZ RICE PANCAKES GRAINS WAFFLES GRITS HASH BROWNS BACON +ON POP KOOL AID WATERMELON FRIED CHICKEN OMMELETES BITCHES N 40Z FRIED +CHICKEN FISH ROLLIN WHEAT GRAINS AND OATS CORN PUFFS WIT WATER FRIED CATFISH +AUNT JEMIMA CRACK COCAINE SOUL FOOD KITCHEN BAKIN BREAD MAKIN GRITS FRIED +CHICKEN WATERMELLON SHRIMP WENDY'S SPICY CHICKEN SANDWICH ROLLIN BLUNTS +SMOKIN JOINTS HENNESEY GIN N JUICE CRISTAL COLONAL SANDERS REPRUHZEN +% +FUBU BIG CHAINZ DUBZ $BLING$ $BLING$ FUCK DA 5-0 BITCHES BLUNTS 40Z KICIKIN +IT BLUNTED JARNELL BABY MAMMA CHILD SUPPORT CHICKEN AN WATERMELON KOOL AID +DA RED KIND FOOD STAMPS WESTSIDE $$CASH MONIES$$ DRIVE BY RYDE OR DIE NIGGA +RUFF RYDA 4 LYFE PHAT ICE PHAT BLUNT DENZEL WASHINGTON ROCAWEAR ICE BLING +BLING 5-0 187 MURDA MURDA FOOD STAMPS BLUNTS PAPERZ BLAZED WELFARE CHITLINS +GRITS KOOL AID HOLLA BACK FUCK DA POLICE ROLLIN IN DA BENZ-O +% +420 BONG TOKE PARTY WEED BOB MARLEY SPLIFF CHEEBA TOKE BONG MARLEY JOINT +WE$D YEAH BOWL PACK WEED SMOKE YEAH NIGGER LEGALIZE SMOKE POT DANK WEED BUDS +FRUIT OF LIFE KOTTONMOUTH KINGZZZZZZ BONGHITS ONEHITS DUGOUT BUBBLER +STEAMROLLER ZIG-ZAG PHAT BAG SINSEMILLA HEMP SMOKE GRASS GAS OR ASS NOONE +RIDES FOR FREE PAPERZ LIGHTARZ LEGALIZ0RZ WHIPITS +% +u dont even know me kid shut the fuck up hidin behind yuor computar id +fuckin lump u out if u fronted on me like that in person fukin bitchass +littel nerd hidin behind cmputar screen littel pussy i kick ur ass irl fagget +% +I love to satisfy women in which ever way they choose. I love to please you +and make you scream and moan until you cant take it no more and grab my head +pushing it between your legs making my tongue go deeper and deeper until it +reaches that spot! And then squeezing my head between your thighs! I keep +going until you are so wet that your sweet juices are drippin and running +down your thighs and on my lips and all over my face +% +This has got to be the worst 'holiday' ever conceived. First, my friends +started by playing a mean prank on me, and then even my family got in on the +act. They took me out back into the woods, tied me to a tree, and paid a +drunken hillbilly to rape me! First he lubed up my asshole with his spit, +and then he proceeded to violently penetrate my ass. The stench exuding from +his unwashed mountain-man body was overwhelming, and only served to make me +sicker than I already had been. I couldn't help but begin vomiting, and this +only seemed to turn the hillbilly on more. After he finally finished and +deposited his semen in my rectum, my family and friends shouted {April +fools!!} They're going to get what's coming to them next year. +% +My father has been gone on Mar 26 due to an bus accident (fuck Shanghai XX +bus corp., fuck Shanghai XX hospital), I am very sorry for often making him +anger. I can't forgive myself, so I decide to stop this project including +reply service for at least 2 months according to our custom, please forgive +me. I promise I will be back, but now I am in very pain... Dad, please +forgive me, please bless mother, sister and me... unf +% +OH IT'S A SLYTHERIN SCARF!!! LOOK AT ME I LIKE HARRY POTTER!!! PS I HAVEN'T +READ THE BOOKS ONLY SEEN THE MOVIES +% +I bet Blihoorlt is one of those guys who has a "word of the day" calendar on +his desk, and every morning he nearly pees his pants because he's so excited +that he's going to learn a new word that he will use all day long (and +usually incorrectly), and then promptly forget it the next day when he tears +off the page. +% +Hyndmost, you appear to have a "sounding smart" fetish. But in reality I bet +you're a depressed nerd who dropped out of school because you couldn't take +getting made fun of anymore. Maybe if you didn't spend 5 minutes looking up +words on dictionary.com, it wouldn't take you so long to reply. +% +i claim to be liberal, and for the most part part i am...but i can't help it +that i just do not like black people. i want to but whenever i see one on +the street or something i can only think "Nigger!" i want to like them and +every once in awhile i meet a nice black person but most of them just seem +to be stupid niggers. +% +Your are thr reason this world going to hell your fucking piece of shit ...i +hope you get strike down by lighting in the middle of the field and then +wolfs eat your smodlering carcus you fucking physco path!! +% +Ladies: walk through the woods, grab a lumberjack, toss him to the ground, +strip him, suck his cock, piss his face wet and then get down to some dirty +dung duty. +% +Yesterday I was cooking some food in the kitchen and I heard an electric +shaver in the bathroom. The only other person in the house was my roommate +who is female. I rolled my eyes, realizing she must be shaving her pubic +area. When I later entered that bathroom, the trash can had a sizable ball +of brown curly hair in it. Gross. +% +There's a pubic hair on my keyboard. What the fuck?? I "mow the lawn" so +it's not mine. Gross. +% +Gentlemen, I am pleased to announce the following: My testicles and penis +are larger than the average size by a considerable degree, which women find +very attractive. I also possess a great deal of wealth, including sports +cars, real estate, works of art, and extensive liquid assets, which are also +very desirable to women. In short, your genotype has no chance to survive. +That is all. +% +I'm not racist (okay, no more racist than the average middle-aged American +white guy), but lately I've been barking out (in a really unnatural voice) +the words "STONE COLD SUPER NIGGER". +% +Please help me before I fry in the pits of hell. I masterbate several times +a day. My parents bought me the anti-erection ring and I deal with the pain +just to have that orgasm. I want to be castrated but my parents tell me I am +to old. They say that at 14 years old i will not be able to handle being +castrated. But they are wrong. +% +I can't believe I just let loose a fart in my pants at my workplace. What +the fuck? I can't sniff and make a disgusted face too soon, because that +would throw suspicion at this very person. Any change in my seating position +might cause the leather of the seat make a farting noise, alerting every +coworker within 30 feet of me. There is no way I could play that off as a +burp. It doesn't help at all that I've been a part timer for 3 weeks. I can +hardly pay the bills! How am I possibly going to explain this to my boss +when he comes back from photocopying TPS reports to ask me what the fuck I +just did in the presense of the CEO? He'll make me drop trou in front of the +temps again. There it is. The fat guy at the desk to the right of me just +asked if I could smell 'that'. I gotta go. +% +Niggers fucked my ass liberally. They strapped me onto the hood of their +Cadillac Escalade and could not keep their enormous dicks out of me. They +were performing many red flag touches. I could not believe how big their +cocks were. I told the niggers the city would not approve of an undercover +police officer shitting blood for a week without a doctor's note. +% + +1002001001001202301004100102010300101001001001010110101010100203010101010120 +THE MATIX HAS U +% +Yeah I hit her. When I told her to jump on my dick she said she was tired +and had to finish cleaning. I told her I wanted some fucking cunny now but +she didn't listen. Yeah I hit her fucking hard and gave her bruises. The +bitch deserved it. It's all her fault. Christ, now the fucking kids are +screaming. I'll be right back, I gotta beat some sense into them. +% +Yeah, I hit the bitch. She was fucking asking for it. I told her to go get +me a beer and sausage and you know what she fucking did? She brought me a +can of beer instead of a bottle. The fuckin whore, she knows the cans are +for the kids and I get bottles. DONGS. +% +BADABABABA IM LOVIN' IT : Scat d00d00d00d00 in my mouth +% +fuck shit bitch ass tits. Lets drop some e shoot some heroin and pass out in +a ditch. 3420 bong toke party. smoke dat herb into yo mind. <3 my mom smoked +so much weed im suprised im not retarded <31 you dumb fucking f a g g o t s +% +I am white trash and I live in a trailer and it's raining real hard outside +and I heard some hard knocking on my door and I looked out the window and I +saw some guy wearing a mask running around to the back of the trailer and +now I hear him banging on the side and then I saw him looking in another +window and now I closed all the blinds and now the power has gone out and I +think he's gonna break in and kill me. +% +I love to lick the sweet pre-cum from a black man. Kiss and lick his nipples +then deep throat his cock until I gag. I'm willing to travel far for a man +who's interested in the best suck he's ever had. Please let me choke and gag +on your cock. I can suck off a 9 inch (22.5cm) cock with ease. I also have +some great butt pussy. It's tight and can be tamed. Let's deep kiss first! +We can share a bottle of wine and get sexy together. +% +Oh My!! Straight from heaven. Ide bury my nose deep in that cotton and take +deep, slow breaths. Enjoying that sweet musky boquet. Suck her taste and +flavor through the moist fabric and smile. Slip the panel aside and gently +lick and suck that tastey pink morsel until she grabbed the back of my head, +bucking her hips and forcing my face into her hot wet snatch. +% +Comcast bid on our junk liberally. They strapped us into their Entertainment +and Communications portfolio and would not keep their offensive investors +off us. They were offering to assume many red-ink net debts. We couldn't +believe what the fuck was going on. We told Comcast the Securities and +Exchange Commission would not approve of two multi-million dollar +corporations merging tax-free. It doesn't help at all that we've been +hypnotizing the youth of America for 67 years. We can hardly turn a profit! +How are we possibly going to explain this to the press when they arrive and +ask us how the fuck we lost the Pixar contract in the presence of our +shareholders? They'll make the Board of Directors drop trau in front of +everyone again. There it is. The FCC just left us a very pissed-off +voicemail. We gotta go. +% +I am a gay. My problem is my asshole is very small and even my finger does +not fit inside. How can I make my asshole wider. +% +The bitch beat the crap out of me. She made me bleed, and left welts on my +ass and back. She was beating me like she was Furio and I owed money to Tony +Soprano. She went to work on my ass with a spatula, wooden kitchen spoons, +everything. She bit my nipples. She even tried to go at my nuts with some +tongs. It was hilarious, and painful. +% +Hi =) i don't mean to do spam... just thought to let u know that there is +another channel around. #HyDrO-WaReZ... thanks =) +% +I went to MacWorld and persuaded an Adobe employee to preview the then beta +of Photoshop 4. He left me to mess around with it on my own and while he was +talking to some other folks I pulled out an ethernet crossover cable and +connected his Mac to my Powerbook and copied over the Photoshop Beta. +% +If your tongue is anything like your foot, then I will sweat like a banchee +if you eat me out. +% +MMMMMMMMMMMMM. Crunchy, mushy CATBOX. The PEARL OF THE ORIENT. You JERK THAT +SHIT, HOLMES. You JERK IT LIKE YOU'VE NEVER JERKED BEFORE. For the LOVE OF +CHRIST AND BALLS, JERK like the WORLD IS GOING TO FUCKING END. +% +Sometimes when I put something full of flavor in my mouth, I close my eyes +and feel like I'm flying-drifting into eternity, above and beyond all the +craziness of the world below, and I dream that all there is in the world is +love, harmony and bacon. In an effort to forward world peace, I plan to be +the first person to send bacon into space. +% +I remember one time at fashion camp Dustin Diamond came up behind me and +pulled my shirt over my head. He pushed me to the ground and jumped on top +of me. He took 3 pairs of handcuffs out of his rear pocket. He used one pair +to bind my hands, another for my feet, and the last one to bind my hands and +feet together. Dustin Diamond then ripped off all of my clothes including my +new shirt and silk briefs. He put his mouth on my penis and masturbated me +for a minute or two and then he turned me around on the ground. Dustin +Diamond then disrobed himself and lay down on top of me. He inserted his +penis in to my anus. I couldn't believe what the fuck was going on. Dustin +Diamond was fucking me in the ass! He continued to fuck me in the ass. I +counted every second of it. After 27 seconds he ejaculated inside of me. I +was mortified. The worst part was that my new shirt was ripped and I didn't +even reach orgasm! +% +But anyway, my dad is said to have a ten inch cock, but I have not seen it +since I was five, so I don't remember. +% +I can't believe I just took a shit in my bathing suit at the beach. What the +fuck? I cant stand up and take it to the ocean, because I am wading in a +puddle of feces at this very moment. Any change in my seating position will +send my poo spilling down my legs and into view of every sunbather within 30 +feet of me. There is no way I can play this off as a fart. It doesn't help +at all that I've been spun out for 3 days. I can hardly see straight! How am +I possibly going to explain this to my wife when she comes back from getting +chili dogs to ask me what the fuck I just did in the presence of my +children? She'll make me drop trau in front of everyone again. There it is. +The family on the blanket to the right of me just asked if I could smell +'that'. I gotta go. +% +By taking the name of the popular operating system 'windows' and replacing +the last bit with 'blows' (which is a colloquialism meaning 'bad' or +'inferior') you've just given the name a whole new meaning, while not really +changing the sound of the word too much! this is the epitome of both wit and +humour! other highly amusing (and often underused) slag terms are 'windoze' +(doze meaning 'light sleep' or 'knap') and {'M$'} (which usually stands for +MicroSoft, but in this case, the 'S' is deliciously replaced with a dollar +sign to represent how they unfairly charge for their products!) This is a +new wave of humour, people. I think we should riddle all our posts, replies +and (where applicable) everyday speech with these little beauties to forever +represent that we, the open source community, know better than everyone else! +% +I AM MR DARL MCBRIDE CURRENTLY SERVING AS THE PRESIDENT AND CHIEF EXECUTIVE +OFFICER OF THE SCO GROUP, FORMERLY KNOWN AS CALDERA SYSTEMS INTERNATIONAL, +IN LINDON, UTAH, UNITED STATES OF AMERICA. I KNOW THIS LETTER MIGHT SURPRISE +YOU BECAUSE WE HAVE HAD NO PREVIOUS COMMUNICATIONS OR BUSINESS DEALINGS +BEFORE NOW. MY ASSOCIATES HAVE RECENTLY MADE CLAIM TO COMPUTER SOFTWARES +WORTH AN ESTIMATED {$1} BILLION U.S. DOLLARS. I AM WRITING TO YOU IN +CONFIDENCE BECAUSE WE URGENTLY REQUIRE YOUR ASSISTANCE TO OBTAIN THESE FUNDS. +% +One day Captain Kirk was maiming his cock with a horseshoe when suddenly Mr. +Spock ran up to him and shoved his pointy ear up his butt. "What is this +for!" the fag captain said. "FAGS FOR YOU AALL!L!!!" the ancient alien +howled as suddenly he farted and Captain Kirk twirled around in a daze and +his foreskin twisted and his kidney stones turned into wooden beads. He +pulled out his pistol and shot lasers at his chastity belt and suddenly he +hurdled his dick into Captain Kirk's bellybutton and it tore his flesh while +Spock fucked his stomach. Kirk hollered out loud and Mr. Spock threw his +shoes to the floor and wrinkled his penis until Kirk bellowed out to make it +stop. A maelstrom of shit whizzed around the ship and suddenly a giant fag +appeared out side and the U.S.S. Enterprise went up his butt. "Oh what the +hell have you gotten us into NOW!" Captain Kirk said as he oozed a condom +back on his dick and put his panties back on. OOH!H!!!!!! Mr. Spock started +fucking him again and shoved his phazer up his butt. He dissolved his glands +and exploded his turds and finally a queer klingon hurdled through the door +and smashed Kirk with his butt hairs. A maniac sucked his dick and suddenly +Mr. Spock fagged Kirk so hard that his intestines burst open and he died. +% +batman touched my junk liberally. he strapped me in to his batmobile and he +couldnt keep his offensive hands off of me. he was performing many red flag +touches. i couldnt believe what the fuck was going on. i told batman the +city would not approve of a millionaire touching an underage kid for free. +% +I'm going to drive a remote controlled car into your mother's pussy and have +it drive on her clitoris over and over again until she cums on it and it +catches on fire and she dies from pussy burning +% + 9/11 was done by sandniggers and all 7-11s are run by sandniggers. +coincidence? i think not. +% +Hello. Did you know Chali is a disgusting whore? Please surf over to Stile's +Stileproject.com to see her latest pornographic material. This bitch +disgusts me in her lascivious lifestyle. All day she hungers for sex and +masturbates and in general pollutes the human condition. Redeem yourself at +#teens4christ. Thanks for reading this. dongs. +% +O say can you see by the monitors early light what so proudly we hailed at +the twilight's last gleaming? Whose broad scripts and bright colour through +the perilous fight O'er the jupes we watched were so gallantly streaming? +And the rockets red glare g-lines bursting in air gave proof through the +night that our chan was still there. O say does that #T4C banner yet wave? +O'er the land of the pedo and the home of the gay. +% +Michael Jackson touched my junk liberally. he slept with me in bed and he +couldnt keep his offensive hands off of me. he was performing many red flag +touches. i couldnt believe what the fuck was going on. i told michael the +city would not approve of the King of Pop touching an underage kid in bed +% +You really do not even know me, child. I demand that you immediately silence +yourself. You're hiding behind your computer, for goodness sake! I would hug +you if you ever talked to me like that in person, child. +% +Yo! First off I love the Lord Jesus. My name is Ron. I am a Freshman at +Winona State. My family is really important to me. I'm not doing this to +find a g/f. I just thought it would be funny and I like to meet new people. +Peace out! +% +Kobe Bryant is being attacked by all the media concerning the sex assault +charge filed against him. It fine when he dunking on the basketball court +but he a criminal when he going strong to the hole with a white woman. That +be some bullsheeeee-it. This is most terrible travesties. First they take +the McRib off the Mack Donald's menu, now this. There will never be justice +for our peoples. +% +Rory touched my virgin junk liberally. He strapped me into his Trans Am and +told me we were taking a detour on the way back from the prom. I could not +believe what the fuck was going on. He vomited red many times as he had been +drinking heavily. I told him the athletic staff would not approve of the +star quarterback falling asleep inside an underage girl. There it is. My dad +found us at makeout ridge. I've got to go. +% +I swear, if these homosexuals don't take a hint and quit sucking my cock all +the time, I'm going to have to resort to drastic measures, like maybe +pinning them down to the cement floor of the loading dock with my powerful +forearms and working my cock all the way up their butt so they understand +loud and clear just how much I disapprove of their unwelcome advances. I +mean, you can't get much more direct than that. +% +I think gay cruises should be called something other than a cruise because +cruising is what gay men do all the time and it's not like they need a +vacation from fucking strangers am i rite gentlemen? +% +I QUIT IRC FOREVER! I'M THROUGH WITH THIS SHIT HOLE FUCK YOU ALL YOU FUCKING +QUEERS! GO BACK TO YOUR FUCKING STUPID TALK ABOUT WEB BROWSERS EVERYONE +KNOWS THAT OPERA SUCKS A FAT DICK ANYWAYS OH AND ALIEN88 - GET A FUCKING +LIFE! YOU'LL NEVER GET A FUCKING GIRLFRIEND ALL YOU DO IS SIT ON FRONT OF +THE COMPUTER ALL DAY LONG AND TALK ABOUT STUPID SHIT WITH THE REST OF THESE +STUPID FAGGOTS! YOU'RE A FUCKING QUEEN ! +% +my girlfriend is so mad just because when she was sucking my cock i clubbed +her with a high heel on the back of the head, grabbed a handful of hair, +yanked her off and started pissing in her face she was choking really bad +and then she vomited on my cock. she should understand that is what i am +into. money ho's and clothes. How can I apologize? +% +i was just awarded a "yellow star" and while i appreciate that you +appreciate my bidding and doing business on ebay. i must tell you though, +that since my family has lost many members in the holocaust, it was very +upsetting to me, to be "awarded a yellow star" . if you are not aware, jews +were made to wear yellow stars to identify them as jews so they could be +rounded up for the concentration camps. +% +I got news for these niggers. They can screw 100 degenerate White sluts a +day and that doesn't change the fact that they're still just niggers. Its +like the niggers who go out and buy Cadillacs or BMWs imagining people will +think they're "high class" or rich. LOL! When people see a nigger riding +around in an expensive car, they automatically know its nobody of any value +or class, just a dumb nigger trying to act rich. +% +I GOT JUMTED IN WHEN I WAS 11 BITCH IM 13 WITH A BULLET STILL KICKING BACK +LEVA..... OH YA THE ONE WHO MADE THE WEB SITE GOOD JOB BUT MAKE THE COLOR +BLUE IN STED OF BITCH ASS RED........FUCK WEST SIDE SNICHES,EAST SIDE +BITCHES,NORTH SIDE SLUTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! +!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! +!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! +% +yo fuckin idiot, trying to step up to me/ you should be lookin up like a +midget standing in front of a tall tree/ i was going to start dissin you/ +but here's what i'll do/ since you start dissing your ownself/ with rhyme as +old as a book covered with dust on top of the bookshelf/ you call yourself +the fuckin idiot/ you must be pretty smart because you came up with it/ +% +Horney? Looking for a quick no strings blow job, swing by, walk in, un zip, +feed it to me, fuck my face, squirt n go. no games, no names, no +reciprocation! very discreet, I live alone, can host anytime this weekend. +You: HWP, 45/under. clean and ready to squirt. send me a message with your +info, age, height, weight and when you wanna squirt. Me: good looking, very +discreet, white male. +% +Hey, I remember one time out on the ranch I was with my brother and I +decided to pull a trick on my brother. I took two thick, dense cords of +sheep feces and put it in a bowl. I gave to my brother and told him it was +chocolate pudding. He began to eat the sheep feces. In fact, HE FINISHED +EVERY LAST BIT! My brother ate sheep shit!!! But the funny thing is, I don't +even have a brother! It was me! I ATE SHEEP SHIT!!! +% +listen you fucking shit skinned coon nigger jungle bunny spear chucker. Shut +your chocolate tar baby hide before I whip your ass. go back to niggeria and +prance around with all the Schvartza in the bush you fucking moolie nigger. +ill fucking brand you toby, and if you try any of that KUNTA KINTA crap ill +fucking execute you and feed you to pigs. +% +this channel is for ballers, shot callers, those rolling and controlling and +folks willing to represent memories of Tupac and keep the dream of the Black +Planet alive. +% +you shut your face you nigger loving pile of intestinal feces, ill rip your +bowels out and feast on them, then i'll impregnate your girlfriend and wait +7 months then unwravel her belly button and suck out all the vaginal +discharge and feast upon the baby. i will fornicate your liver, then make +you guzzle gallon after gallon of putrid diarrhea. you will gag on my green +logs of asshole mud butter +% +oh wait you remember when frodo was dry humping bilbo up the ass in a +classroom at gryffendorf then harry potter walked in and started tossing +frodo's salad HOLY SHIT I DO NOT CARE +% +u dont even know me kid shut the fuck up hidin behind your computer i'd +fuckin lump u out if you fronted on me like that in person kid +% +So you guys can go on about your mitsis and your fake idles and whatever +bullshit you talk about to pass the time and make the constant throbbing +reminder that your live is a living hell go away. I'll be hanging out with +my FRIEND, watching anime. +% +I'll fuck you in the ass you punk ass white boy. I'll fuck you in the ass +you coward, you bitch. You fucking faggot! Come up and take me on you scared +coward. You white bitch. You ain't man enough to fuck with me, bitch! There +ain't no-one in the room big enough to take me on. You're just scared like a +little white pussy. I'll fuck you till you love me, you faggot! +% +It's safe to say that I am one of the world's foremost experts on memes and in fact there is no one I can think of that has a meme resume as impressive as mine. So please tell me, what are your qualifications to say that I don't know what a meme is?}} diff --git a/vars/_index b/vars/_index index 515e39f..229e5a4 100644 --- a/vars/_index +++ b/vars/_index @@ -197,6 +197,7 @@ the_key 15960fcfd1fa841fec22edd3cdb43e000481b704 thecharacter 500d1f6901ee60d7c5c15207ede04a75e3d80ab0 thesecret 211a492a3371d6d290933b1d4f7162a9b29463f9 tranny_dict 51736692ecd6fbe4296f22b711e44c12e7d345b1 +trolldb 65f4db31e0536a2e56b7d1f8b1fc252dda9b13bc unixprog_dict 6f8db3e41b0c4f419cd676828926c9dbdf0f6276 var e5b4e786e382d03c28e9edfab2d8149378ae69df vflip_pairs_better f86d8f97015cbb1764992341f73c320af09c95b2